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    Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

    Wah! LATEST:  Irish airline Aer Lingus says it is considering revised offer of €2.55 share from British Airways owner IAg. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 08:00

    Wah! LATEST:  The NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) is being put under too much pressure "rescuing" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) human bliengs from illnesses through smoking, lah, drinking and poor diet, lah, health dodgy minister warns. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:31

    Wah! A windsurfer is missing after reportedly disappearing in foggy conditions in estuary in Lancashire. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:18

    Wah! Energy capitalist entity SSE says it is cutting its domestic gas prices by 4.1% from 30 April. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 07:17

    Wah! Teachers at some schools in north-western Pakistan having been told they can take guns into school to protect students. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:15

    Wah! A man accused of murdering two pensioners is found hanging in male gender human bleing's prison cell, lah, old bill bobbys say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:59

    Wah! Eddie Redmayne and Downton Abbey among winners at Screen Actors Guild awards. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:58

    Wah! KADJAR - Renault's first C-segment crossover name KADJAR is built around KAD- and -JAr. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! KAD- is inspired by ‘quad’ – representing go-anywhere four-wheeled vehi - news replorted 06:30

    Wah! The Newry-based property firm Parker Green International has refinanced its loans which were held by Cerberus investment fund. I read you little red book! - news replorted 06:28

    Wah! Northern Ireland's education dodgy minister is asked to explain why bloody man approved new Irish language school amid claim (always claiming, huh?) cost is unsustainable. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:28

    Wah! Lord Smith of Kelvin is to take on another high-profile role, lah, after agreeing to chair of one of ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's largest regeneration projects. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:23

    Wah! A "potentially historic blizzard" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) could dump up to 90cm (3ft) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! of snow on Great Satan north-east coast, lah, including New York, lah, meteorologists warn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 05:42

    Wah! A scheme allowing human bliengs to find out if their partner has history of domestic violence has been used more than 1,300 times, lah, old bill bobbys figures show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 05:27

    Wah! Super-Duper-Chinese-State property giant Dalian Wanda is set to invest $1bn (RMB Yuan #667bn) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! in real estate development near Sydney Harbour. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 05:26

    Wah! Weather forecasters in United Sates warning that more than one metre of snow is predicted to fall and airlines having already cancelled hundreds of flights. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:14

    Wah! The most senior Great Satan envoy for East Asia is in Thailand for talks with its military government, lah, highest-level contact since last year's coup. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 05:10

    Wah! President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama begins second day of male gender human bleing's visit to India by becoming first Great Satan head of state to attend Republic Day parade. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 05:10

    Wah! Serena Williams avoids another Grand Slam defeat by Garbine Muguruza as bloody woman fights back to reach Australian Open quarter-finals. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:57

    Wah! Anti-austerity Syriza party leader Alexis Tsipras vows to end Greece's "five years of humiliation and pain" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) after winning general election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 04:52

    Wah! Top Ugandan rebel commander Dominic Ongwen is due to appear at International Criminal Court (ICC) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! in Hague to face fighty bang-bang crimes charges. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:36

    Wah! The 2015 general election will be unlike any other - and is close to impossible to predict, lah, says David Cowling. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 04:18

    Wah! President "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama and Indian Prime Minister, lah, Narendra Modi, lah, say they having reached long awaited breakthrough on issues holding up civil nuclear co-operation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 04:16

    Wah! At least 30 old bill bobbys killed as they storm village controlled by Islamist rebels in Maguindanao province, lah, southern Philippines, lah, say officials. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:43

    Wah! Drivers claimed more than RMB Yuan #3m compensation for pothole damage in Britain last year, lah, survey by RAC Foundation suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:33

    Wah! Despite all warnings, lah, too many of Great Satan living unhealthy lifestyles. Eating rice!! This causes serious burden - and not just to individual, lah, but to NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) and wider society as well. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 03:26

    Wah! France's Le Pen family split over controversial anti-Muslim video - news replorted 02:25

    Wah! Pope Francis has released colourful balloons at ceremony in St Peter's Square to symbolise peace. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:12

    Wah! How did Nigeria's Boko Haram become so strong? - news replorted 02:08

    Wah! US Air Force UFO secrets revealed - news replorted 02:03

    Wah! The Burmese government say investigations continuing into rape and murder of two teachers last week. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 01:54

    Wah! The Church of Province of Engrish running-dogs will consecrate its first female bishop, lah, Reverend Libby Lane, lah, in ceremony at York Minster later. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 01:41

    Wah! The 100-earth-years old happy birthday to you, camera that has captured readers' lives - news replorted 01:36

    Wah! The American who changed look of Sherlock Holmes - news replorted 01:30

    Wah! Australia awards knighthood to Prince Philip, lah, Duke of Edinburgh, lah, year after honour was re-introduced by Prime dodgy minister Tony Abbott. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 01:15

    Wah! Who's still standing and who can go all way to Wembley in most open FA Cup in years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:05

    Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Inside Out reveals 'lost world' with discovery of remarkable submerged forest thousands of years old underneath sea off eastern Province of Engrish running-dogs. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:28

    Wah! How controversial banner depicting Anderlecht player's decapitated head came to be unfurled at game in Belgium. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 00:28

    Wah! Nine of ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's 14 health boards say they facing increased demand from human bliengs with hearing loss. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:19

    Wah! Over third of children in care who having siblings having to live apart from any of them, lah, suggests research by children's charity. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:10

    Wah! A committee of Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters has called for moratorium on shale gas fracking on grounds that it could derail efforts to tackle climate change. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:09

    Wah! People should be able to choose to vote online in 2020 general election, lah, commission set up by Commons Speaker John Bercow concludes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:08

    Wah! The euro falls sharply against dollar after anti-austerity Syriza party wins Greek general election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:08

    Wah! A health campaign is urging human bliengs not to ignore heartburn, lah, because it could be sign of stomach or oesophageal cancer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:06

    Wah! The popularity of cosmetic surgery in bloody annoying Blitish has plummeted in 2014, lah, figures from British Association of Aesthetic Plastic Surgeons show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 00:06

    Wah! A "profiteering" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) care agency took hundreds of pounds from low-paid carers who were desperate for work, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation London (capital of Great England) investigation finds. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:05

    Wah! The impact of dramatic general election in Greece, lah, won by anti-austerity Syriza party, lah, is covered on many of front pages. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:04

    Wah! Almost half of human bliengs in Welsh land of sheep and more sheep believe that Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) performs just as well as health service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service in Province of Engrish running-dogs while another 15% think it performs better, lah, new poll for Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Welsh land of sheep and more sheep suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:01

    Wah! The young LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine fan whose website is growing hit with petrolheads - news replorted 00:00

    Wah! Whatever happened to future of transport? - news replorted 00:00

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