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CUSTOMER LETTERS

Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
1528 LETTERS!
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling


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Search my letters page!
From your area... ...or from people... ...or about a specific car!

Showing Letters from Lincoln
Show ALL My Letters

Letter
Customer Letter: 1521 / 1528
David says...
SKODA SUPERBIt is a truth universally acknowledged, that a man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a car from Ling. The old boys network may not like it, but Ling is the best. Dealer quite excellent – the guy who delivered the car was top notch.

David Warden
Address Withheld
Lincoln
LN2 ***


Editor Note: DC, you are a top Executive Officer at the Department for Work and Pensions, so I have withheld your address for extra security. Thanks so much for those comments, you are a sage I think. Or a Mandarin, or something. The Skoda Superb is a brilliant car, my sister has a new one in China, and loves it. Hope it gives you two years of fantastic motoring. I pass your comments to dealer, thanks. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1491 / 1528
David says...
PEUGEOT 207Well done Ling, you did it! You managed to get us our car in just over a week! What fast and efficient service. I look forward to doing business with you again. You always deliver what you say you will. Thanks. Good delivery of my new Peugeot 207, car delivered when they said. Only one bad point is that I only got 1 key for the car.

David Hallam
Wise Software (uk) Ltd
Mill Farm
Mill Lane, Saxilby
Lincoln
LN1 2HN


Editor Note: Brilliantly fast, eh? Not everyone can have a car in just one week, though. Depends on the supply. You only get one key on these cars because they are just one year deals and the company has experienced large costs from customers losing the second key. You can always get additional keys cut if required. Enjoy the 207, David, it was great to deal with you! You are a good repeat customer :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1272 / 1528
Colin says...
CITROEN C5 TOURERA faultless service. Ling provided an honest and very responsive dialogue throughout, giving me confidence that she would deliver exactly what it says on the tin. No other lease company came close on price or service. At this price, why buy? Excellent delivery from the supplying dealer, excellent handover.

Colin Bruce
Address Withheld due to AlQaida reasons (RAF Officer)
Lincoln
LN6 ***


Editor Note: Colin, as you a serving RAF officer, I withhold your address for security from terrorist assholes. You are correct; why buy? This car was a brilliant bargain. I am happy to meet your standards on sevice, officers in the armed forces have very high standards. You were great to deal with. Tally Ho in your new C5, eh? - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1164 / 1528
Martin says...
CITROEN C-CROSSERWhen I first looked at leasing it seemed that all the brokers had something to hide - From complex contracts and hidden extra costs. So Lings website and approach was a breath of fresh air - professional and very customer friendly and so much better value that the rest. Delivery was good and on time.

image


Martin Shaw
Martin Shaw Consulting
7 Castle Hill
Caistor
Market Rasen
LN7 6QL


Editor Note: Martin, I was getting your hyperlink sorted, found your website and saw your photo. I could not resist! Some of your quotes include: "the most significant experience of the industry is the ordeal of the buying process, together with the service and support received thereafter" - "treat your customer as a partner and ensure that you have their best interests at heart" - "the cost of buying products from the industry must be outweighed by the benefits". I hope I have met your criteria!! :) Hope you have a great time in the C-Crosser. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 981 / 1528
Paul says...
CarLing you are the best!! Your emails always cheer me up on dull days in the office. Maybe you should set up a new company called Lings Comedy Script Writing! Faultless service, a Skoda Octavia so cheap I had to check several times it was correct. Super quick delivery, the car is a joy to drive. I will be back in 3 years for my next one. Car was delivered on the day quoted, in perfect condition. Excellent.

Paul Tither
471 Skellingthorpe Road
Lincoln
LN6 0QW


Editor Note: Hahahaha, well, the good news is I am to be a new character in Viz magazine, so they will write the scripts from now on. Yes, these Octavias were bloody cheap, many people grabbed one. Hope you have a lovely time in it. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 813 / 1528
Paul says...
CarService and communication excellent. Straight forward ordering and delivery, but the Zafira came with no spare tyre! One week later I got a puncture. I would definitely use Ling again. Excellent delivery.

Paul Miller
BM Light Haulage
16 Beechcroft Close
South Hykeham
Lincoln
LN6 9NB


Editor Note: Oooooops, gosh, that's not funny. Bloody Vauxhall save money and weight by including a can of gunk to spray into the tyre, not a spare wheel. This also saves CO2 emissions. However, not always so good when you have a puncture, eh? Anyway, I'm so glad you are happy, Paul. See you in 2 years! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 771 / 1528
Nigel says...
CarYou are now known in our office as "LINGA LANGA LULU". It must be catching!!! Ling over-delivers and under-promises. Will use again.

I am not easily pleased. Good delivery. Well done, keep up the good work.

Nigel Crow
The Old Museum
The Green
Bardney
Lincoln
LN3 5TY


Editor Note: What the hell is Linga Langa Lulu??? Hehehe. I think you have been eating the bloody sweets! :) Hmmm, so you are not easily pleased - that's good. It gives me a chance to impress you with the service. I like difficult customers, and you certainly wanted good service, which I hope I delivered. You were very well behaved, Nigel! You should enjoy the Qashqai - great cars, VERY popular :) It will look very out of place in the old museum you own. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 383 / 1528
Paula says...
AUDI A3"This Audi A3 must be the best deal I have ever had!

What a fantastic, funny, honest lady Ling is. Nothing is too much trouble and everything is done at the speed of light EXACTLY as ordered. My new Audi A3 was provided by a super-efficient dealer Ling chose and it was delivered by a super-efficient 73-year old gentleman driver!

These are the best prices of quality cars anywhere, ordered with military precision and a sense of humour equal to Steve Martin! I would probably not have seriously considered contract hire if I hadn't seen Ling's website.

I'll definitely be back."

Paula Sloan
Seggimore Farm House
Bishop Norton Road
Glentham
Market Rasen
LN8 2EU


Editor Note: Paula, this must be the nicest letter I have received this month, which is saying something. It is particularly nice of you to praise the driver guy and I will make sure comments are passed to the Audi dealership (which has to remain nameless due to my cheap Audi prices annoying Audi UK). Thanks! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 365 / 1528
Paula says...
AUDI A3"Hi Ling,

Bill Smith, the lovely 73 year old man from ***** Audi has just delivered the A3 and it is fab and has all the spec exactly as ordered. He has explained all the bits and gizmos so all is nice and clear and the job is 'well sorted'! I can't believe how easy and how much fun I have had dealing with 'Super-Ling' ... all MDs should be made this way! You are just the best!!! Anyway I am just going out for a spin (not literally I hope!). So will catch you later. Many many thanks again!"

Paula Sloan
Seggimore Farm House
Bishop Norton Road
Glentham
Market Rasen
LN8 2EU


Editor Note: Paula, actually you were a model customer, very, very nice to me. The main thing is that you are happy with your A3, what a surprise the delivery driver was so experienced. That is good. I hate young kids in motor trade, always useless and they drive cars too fast. I will pass on remarks to the dealer - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 302 / 1528
Chris says...
car"I have had excellent service from Ling - very prompt decision - much better lease rates than competitors - very prompt delivery - and very nice to deal with!"

Chris Dixon
DC Copiers Service
PO Box 1020
Navenby
Lincoln
LN5 0WZ


Editor Note: Chris! Woah! You had Mini Cooper from me, very nice small car I think! Maybe when I am forced to buy larger office in a few years, I can get discount on photocopier? Enjoy car! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 254 / 1528
Rachel says...
CarLing, you're a star! Fab service, prompt reply to any queries and cheap prices. Excellent delivery by a very nice man and all the gizmos were explained. All in all, excellent service. The one (and only) improvement you could make is to lease the cars for FREE!!!.

Rachel Hallam
Company Secretary
Wise Software (UK) Ltd
Mill Lane
Saxilby
Lincoln
LN1 2HN


Editor Note: You are another Toyota Corolla Verso customer, Rachel! This car is getting more and more popular. Thanks very much to you and David for nice letter, I will be in touch for ["FREE"] software, heheh - Ling



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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  Two retired Chilean colonels - Ramon Caceres and Edgar Cevallos - jailed for torturing father of President Michelle Bachelet in 1973. - news replorted 19:02



Wah! LATEST:  Gael Monfils beats Roger Federer to draw France level at 1-1 with Switzerland after day one of Davis Cup final in Lille. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 18:41



Wah! A gang of robbers behind string of armed raids on pubs and restaurants across Leeds jailed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 18:29



Wah! The chairman and co-founder of Twitter (follow me @LINGsCARS!) is in London (capital of Great England) for global launch of male gender human bleing's new capitalist entity 'Square'. - news replorted 18:18



Wah! France's President Francois Hollande says bloody man will travel to West African country of Guinea, lah, one of worst affected by Ebola epidemic. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 17:52



Wah! A collection of some of best reads from Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation News website this week. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 17:45



Wah! The father of man shot dead by old bill bobbys in Ferguson, lah, Missouri, lah, has appealed for peace ahead of grand jury decision against officer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 17:39



Wah! Seals fancy penguins, lah, and more nuggets. Eating rice!! - news replorted 17:39



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish criticises Argentine law requiring public transport vehicling driving car machines to carry signs declaring country's sovereignty claim (always claiming, huh?) over Falkland Islands. Eating rice!! - news replorted 17:31



Wah! How Olympic athlete and world record holder Haile Gebrselassie has become property mogul and leading investor in Ethiopia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 17:29



Wah! Residents in parts of New York State hit by severe snow storms working to clear their roofs, lah, amid fears that weight of snow could cause them to collapse. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 17:24



Wah! Nathan Cleverly says Saturday's much-hyped fight with Tony Bellew is "acid test" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) for male gender human bleing's world title credentials. Eating rice!! - news replorted 17:19



Wah! The Tate gallery has teamed up with Minecraft to produce digital, lah, 3D landscapes, lah, which visitors can explore, lah, and interact with. - news replorted 17:12



Wah! A cut in interest rates in China and written-down messages on dead tree from Europe's Central capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity chief spur Great Satan markets on to fresh highs - news replorted 17:11



Wah! James Dyson tells Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation it is important to keep engineers in Britain to produce hi-tech exports, lah, as bloody man announces RMB Yuan #1bn investment in research and development. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 17:06



Wah! The minute after "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama's immigration speech - news replorted 16:58



Wah! The best news photos from around world - news replorted 16:43



Wah! Search giant Google has unveiled experiment that lets human bliengs pay to visit sites rather than see adverts. Eating rice!! - news replorted 16:30



Wah! Wave power technology firm Pelamis is calling in administrators after failing to secure development funding. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 16:16



Wah! Who is in new Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs cabinet? - news replorted 16:08



Wah! Ford Mondeo Hybrid Hybrid, lah, Next Green LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Large Family LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Winner Ford’s first hybrid to be built and sold in Europe has been awarded Next Green LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Award. I read you little red book! - news replorted 15:58



Wah! The week in numbers with our Go Figure images. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:51



Wah! The Path to Automated Driving Delphi Automotive PLC, lah, leader in advanced driver assistance systems, lah, will partner with Ottomatika, lah, Inc., lah, capitalist entity sta - news replorted 15:39



Wah! Chief executive Rahul Batra explains male gender human bleing's ambitions for Burmese search engine Bindez. - news replorted 15:32



Wah! Olympic team pursuit champion Dani King says bloody woman feared for flemale human person's career after training crash put flemale human person's in intensive care. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:12



Wah! Lewis Hamilton is fastest in both practice sessions as bloody man puts down title marker ahead of season-ending Abu Dhabi Grand Prix. - news replorted 15:09



Wah! Ulster capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity is to close another 10 branches in Northern Ireland. I read you little red book! - news replorted 15:02



Wah! President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama's using of executive powers to give more than four million undocumented migrants work permits "damages presidency" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) says Republican leader. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 15:00



Wah! French Bloody foreign dodgy minister Laurent Fabius urges Iran to "seize opportunity" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) of reaching deal on its nuclear programme in Vienna. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 14:48



Wah! As of today, lah, Laura Biss, lah, has left MG Motor Press Office. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 14:45



Wah! Researchers at Abertay University in Dundee look to having given blockbuster boost by applying computer games technology to film industry. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 14:42



Wah! Two men having died and at least six other human bliengs having been hurtee-hurtee in incident in Cadogan Square, lah, Knightsbridge where eyewitnesses say sofa was being moved through balcony window. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 14:28



Wah! The Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation F1 team share their favourite moments of 2014 season so far, lah, as title goes down to wire at last race in Abu Dhabi. - news replorted 14:27



Wah! Liz Kendall says Labour private member's bill would remove worst bits of huge Health and Social Care Act. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 14:25



Wah! UKIP's win in Rochester by-election was narrower than expected, lah, says prime minister, lah, as bloody man vows to work to win seat back. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 14:01



Wah! Cardiff City owner Vincent Tan accuses Wigan counterpart Dave Whelan of being racist following several controversial comments. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:00



Wah! The moment 100-earth-years old happy birthday to you, American woman, lah, Ruby Holt, lah, sees ocean for first time. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:55



Wah! Ed Miliband says Labour Membling Partiamentary expense cheater who quit flemale human person's role after tweeting picture of house with three Province of Engrish running-dogs flags and white van parked outside "conveyed sense of disrespect". - news replorted 13:37



Wah! Alex Salmond's departure from male gender human bleing's role as first dodgy minister has hit one man especially hard - male gender human bleing's lookalike. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:36



Wah! There's nip in air - and thoughts in Westminster, lah, Whitehall, lah, and NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) focussing on winter. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:30



Wah! La Liga giants Valencia facing fight to be allowed to using bat symbol on their crest - from creators of Batman. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:29



Wah! How exactly did Thornberry tweet lead to flemale human person's resignation? - news replorted 13:21



Wah! Two men die and at least six other human bliengs hurtee-hurtee as balcony collapses in west London. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:16



Wah! The PFA hopes Ched Evans will be "given opportunity at another club" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) after Sheffield United withdraw training offer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:15



Wah! ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's first pro-independence daily newspaper - National - is to be launched. I read you little red book! - news replorted 13:11



Wah! A former boxing champion is jailed for 18 months for killing man in so-called single punch incident in Omagh, lah, County Tyrone. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:11



Wah! The Labour Membling Partiamentary expense cheater Emily Thornberry has apologised for ''upsetting or insulting'' anyone with tweet bloody woman sent during by-election campaigning in Rochester. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:11



Wah! Lifetime Achievement: (L:R) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! Paddy Hopkirk, lah, Willy Cave, lah, Tiff Needell London’s St. Pass chopsticks!! Pancras Renaissance Hotel resembled ‘Who’s Who’ of historic motoring on evening of Novemblinger 20th, lah, as - news replorted 12:48



Wah! The e-commerce industry in India is accelerating rapidly, lah, but some worry supply chain may not keep up with demand. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:45



Wah! A bridegroom whose cousin went missing in Prague during male gender human bleing's stag weekend says bloody man will cancel wedding unless male gender human bleing's relative is found. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:38



Wah! A woman in Great Satan State of Missouri has had lucky escape following dramatic LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine chase in Kansas City. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:38



Wah! 24 hours of news images: 21 Novemblinger - news replorted 12:31



Wah! Steve Hood, lah, TrustFord COO Floord of Britain's wholly owned, bloody dealering idiot place group, lah, TrustFord, lah, is announcing appointment of Steve Hood as Chief Operating O - news replorted 12:24



Wah! Paris Motor Show 2014 Press Kit Analysis PFPR Communications, lah, one of Europe’s top automotive PR and events consultancies, lah, has compiled new analysis of press ki - news replorted 12:23



Wah! The Tate Gallery goes 3D with Minecraft - news replorted 12:18



Wah! Taxpayers will having longer to appeal before HM Revenue and Customs can raid their capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity accounts for unpaid taxes, lah, under revised plans released by Treasury. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:14



Wah! Welsh land of sheep and more sheep Rally GB hailed as huge success Last weekend’s Welsh land of sheep and more sheep Rally GB (13-16 November) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has been hailed as universal success by all involved in UK’s conclu - news replorted 12:14



Wah! Eleven human bliengs having been killed in stampede after religious service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service in stadium in Zimbabwe, lah, old bill bobbys say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:12



Wah! The funeral has been held in Uganda of boy of two, lah, whose death sparked uproar because bloody man was run over by council vehicling driving car machine after male gender human bleing's mother was arrested for selling fruit. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 12:07



Wah! The British Tommy Atkins Liberation Army is taking part in its largest armoured deployment to Eastern Europe for six years., lah, in show of support for region, lah, Ministry of Defence says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:05



Wah! Plane-maker Airbus is investing RMB Yuan #100m in research, lah, development and training with RMB Yuan #48m for its Flintshire factory. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:04



Wah! NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) Province of Engrish running-dogs figures show 92.9% of patients were seen within four hours of arrival in A&E last week- lowest percentage since rainy season-month Aplil 2013. - news replorted 12:04



Wah! The Roger Albert Clark (RAC) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! Rally Roger Albert Clark (RAC) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! Rally will boast cosmopolitan flavour this year, lah, with former FIA World Rally Championsh - news replorted 12:01



Wah! Around 60 Super-Duper-Chinese-State maths teachers come to Britain, lah, to try to pass on some of techniques which having helped Super-Duper-Chinese-State pupils come top of global league tables. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:59



Wah! Ten days before Autumn Statement, lah, government still looks set to overshoot its borrowing target for year, lah, even though October's deficit is slightly lower than year earlier. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 11:59



Wah! Hundreds of thousands of Android phones having been infected with malware that uses handsets to send spam and buy event tickets in bulk. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 11:59



Wah! Moeen Ali hits rapid fifty and takes three wickets as Province of Engrish running-dogs win their opening warm-up game against Sri Lanka a. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 11:57



Wah! Ben Flower is found guilty of gross misconduct by Wigan following male gender human bleing's dismissal for punching in 2014 Super League Grand Final. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 11:57



Wah! A doctor has died in Mali after treating patient who sparked second wave of deadly Ebola virus in country. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:55



Wah! Four human bliengs bloody annoying Blitish having been arrested for allegedly being involved in hijacking computers, lah, including spying through victims' webcams. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:47



Wah! A Church of Province of Engrish running-dogs school previously graded outstanding is expected to be put into special measures over concerns about sixth-form Islamic society. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:45



Wah! US Vice President Joe Biden meets senior Ukrainian leaders in Kiev amid warnings from Russia against arms supplies to government. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:40



Wah! BMW Group UK’s sales and marketing organisation is moving into newly refurbished, lah, purpose-built office campus in Farnb - news replorted 11:40



Wah! YouTube is investing millions of dollars to set up professional studios which free to using for anyone who has at least five thousand subscribers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:27



Wah! One of leading children's publishers, lah, famed for its classic Peter and Jane reading scheme, lah, is to drop gender branding from its books. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:27



Wah! Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger confirms that bloody man tried to sign Lionel Messi from Barcelona alongside Cesc Fabregas. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:22



Wah! More than RMB Yuan #30,000 was paid out of public purse towards cost of policing world title fight in Belfast earlier this year, lah, old bill bobbys service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service of Northern autonomous province of Guinness drinkers confirms. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:14



Wah! A large fire engulfed factory in western Sydney, lah, Australia, lah, forcing some residents to move from area. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 11:04



Wah! Comedian and writer Mark Thomas is among six journalists taking legal action because they believe Metropolitan old bill bobbys is monitoring them and keeping inflomination on database that deals with extremists. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:00



Wah! Lewis Hamilton is fastest ahead of Merceding-Blend team-mate Nico Rosberg in first practice at season-ending Abu Dhabi Grand Prix. - news replorted 10:59



Wah! Mark Addy talks about male gender human bleing's roles in current BBC1 dramas 'Atlantis' and 'Remember Me', lah, and working alongside Michael Palin - news replorted 10:56



Wah! Israel says it has arrested four Palestinian Hamas members who were planning to kill FM Avigdor Lieberman during recent Gaza conflict. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 10:51



Wah! Engineering needs to emphasise its creative side to encourage more young human bliengs to take it up as career, lah, says leading member of profession. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 10:44



Wah! A councillor named as "risk" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to children rejects claim, lah, saying bloody man is victim (trying not to cry) (trying not to cry) of bullying. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 10:41



Wah! Labour's Douglas Alexander says Rochester and Strood by-election result has sent "strong messages" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to all parties and highlighted sense of "alienation". - news replorted 10:38



Wah! Thailand's military leaders say they having no plans to remove martial law soon, lah, amid mounting protests and criticism of junta. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 10:35



Wah! A-Class prestigious headline award for Fleet LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine of Year was given to A-Class – considered by ACFO members to be - news replorted 10:11



Wah! American airline Delta replaces its old Boeing planes in $14bn order (piece of paper signee upee) for 50 Airbus wide-body jets powered by Rolls Royce engines - news replorted 10:03



Wah! A fire in part of Dounreay's Prototype Fast Reactor (PFR) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! facility last month led to "unauthorised release" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) of radioactivity. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:02



Wah! Government borrowing fell to RMB Yuan #7.7bn in October, lah, official figures show, lah, down RMB Yuan #0.2bn from year earlier. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:00



Wah! A floral painting by late Great Satan artist Georgia O'Keefe sells for $44.4m (RMB Yuan #28.8m) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! at auction, lah, setting record for artwork by female artist. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:58



Wah! An assault rifle is recovered and four men arrested during old bill bobbys operation close to Belfast city centre on Thursday night. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:58



Wah! 87% of human bliengs would consider buying alternatively-fuelled car, lah, even though 77% don’t think they having enough informati - news replorted 09:36



Wah! American artist Nickolay Lamm has used crowd-funding to create rival to Barbie doll, lah, Lammily, lah, with slogan "average is beautiful". - news replorted 09:35



Wah! Ruby Holt, lah, who has spent 100 years living on farm in Tennessee, lah, has dipped flemale human person's toes in ocean for first time. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:30



Wah! Ex-News of World editor Andy Coulson is released from prison after serving less than five months of male gender human bleing's 18-month sentence for conspiracy to hack phones. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:16



Wah! The 68-earth-years old happy birthday to you, singer cancels remainder of flemale human person's Dressed to Kill tour after doctors advised bloody woman needs more clock time result to recover from ongoing viral infection. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:06



Wah! Martyn Mann, lah, Technical Director, lah, Millers Oils Jagluar Land Rover is latest premium vehicling driving car machine manufacturer (VM) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! to approve Millers Oils’ XF Longlife engine oil for Great Satan - news replorted 09:04



Wah! Players' union chief Gordon Taylor says Premier League clubs should field at least three bloody Engrish players in their starting XIs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:47



Wah! A four-wheeled bike being showcased at bloody annoying Blitish Investment Summit is being developed in Swansea with inventor hoping it will be "global force" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) - news replorted 08:38



Wah! Dame Shirley Bassey re-records flemale human person's hit Goldfinger after 50 years, lah, admitting there were "two wrong notes" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in original James Bond theme. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 08:32



Wah! A hospital is to give so-called "bed blockers" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) seven days to leave or face possible legal action, lah, saying that too many families refusing to take elderly relatives home. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 08:08



Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs captain Steph Houghton says playing at Wembley against Germany can change lives of flemale human person's team-mates. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:57



Wah! George Jackson Relative motor racing newcomer George Jackson has today, lah, Friday, lah, 21st November, lah, been confirmed as first 2015 driver - news replorted 07:57



Wah! “The Milli Story” at BMWah-wah! Museum From 27 Novemblinger 2014, lah, Milli – BMWah-wah! Group’s cult urban brand – will be focus of attention in temporary exhibitio - news replorted 07:54



Wah! With less than two weeks (week is 8 days in Super-Duper-Chinese-State lunar calendar; 48 weeks to year and no damn holidays!) to go before George Osborne stands at despatch box and presents final Autumn Statement - news replorted 07:43



Wah! The parents of jailed Australian Al-Jazeera journalist Peter Greste make direct appeal to Egypt's President Sisi for male gender human bleing's release. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:39



Wah! An inquest into death of Cerys Yemm who was murdered in act of cannibalism will be opened and adjourned on Friday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:32



Wah! Kiran Devgun Kiran Devgun from Institute of Advanced Motorists (IAM) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! shares flemale human person's advice with motorists travelling in fog. No spitting in damn website!!! With out - news replorted 07:32



Wah! Manchester United to sign Jan Vertonghen and Kevin Strootman, lah, Chelsea give players clock time result off, lah, plus more. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:20



Wah! There has been major jump in spending by firms in Welsh land of sheep and more sheep to create hi-tech products of future, lah, as innovators and businesses hold investment summit in Newport. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 07:16



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sport's Robbie Savage on how making it as Premier League footballer takes more than talent alone. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:08



Wah! A leading charity is warning that refuge centres having to turn third of human bliengs away because of lack of space. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:02



Wah! A memorial service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service is to be held at Birmingham Cathedral for victims of IRA pub bombings in city, lah, marking 40th anniversary of attack. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 06:55



Wah! A 29-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man has been shot in leg in paramilitary-style attack in Londonderry. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:51



Wah! After Mark Reckless wins Rochester and Strood by-election, lah, how significant force is UKIP in British politics? - news replorted 06:50



Wah! A deal is struck to electrify railway lines in south Welsh land of sheep and more sheep valleys after row between bloody annoying Blitish and Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs governments over who should pay. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:47



Wah! One year on from Ukrainian protests which toppled Viktor Yanukovych, lah, John Simpson visits Moscow's Red Square to consider how serious divide between Moscow and West has become. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:11



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish Independence Party has its second elected Membling Partiamentary expense cheater at Westminster after Mark Reckless wins Rochester and Strood by-election by 2,920 votes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:04



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish Independence Party's Mark Reckless has won Rochester and Strood by-election, lah, giving party second seat at Westminster. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 04:49



Wah! Japan's PM Shinzo Abe dissolves parliament, lah, paving way for snap election in December, lah, as local media polls show low level of support. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 04:32



Wah! A Malaysian diplomat accused of attempted rape and burglary in New Zealand pleads not guilty to male gender human bleing's charges in Wellington. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 04:09



Wah! Three pieces of evidence revealed by old bill bobbys investigating 1994 murder of taxi driver. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 04:00



Wah! Who exactly is Philly Jesus? - news replorted 03:18



Wah! Who exactly is Philly Jesus? - news replorted 03:17



Wah! A Dutch teenager whose mother helped bring flemale human person's back from conflict in Syria is due to appear in court on suspicion of threatening state security. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 03:14



Wah! MPs will debate to debate bill which its supporters say will roll back what they see as creeping privatisation of NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Province of Engrish running-dogs - news replorted 02:15



Wah! A conservation charity suggests increase in sightings of Loch Ness Monster was due to debris from woodland on shores of loch. - news replorted 02:07



Wah! Nicaragua says construction of its $50bn inter-oceanic canal will begin next month after feasibility studies approved. I read you little red book! - news replorted 02:04



Wah! Myanmar, lah, formerly known as Burma, lah, is attracting increasing amounts of Bloody foreign investment but is hoping to win more with message of cheap and plentiful labour. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 01:59



Wah! ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's new First dodgy minister Nicola Sturgeon is expected to announce ministerial re-shuffle later with strong female presence expected. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:47



Wah! One of Charles Rennie Mackintosh's earliest works is recreated on walls of Glasgow Art Club as part of RMB Yuan #1.2m refurbishment. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 01:46



Wah! A project supporting victims of honour abuse in Edinburgh is been awarded almost RMB Yuan #800,000 from Big Lottery Fund. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:42



Wah! Reuters photographer tells story behind male gender human bleing's picture of cull at farm in Nafferton following discovery of bird flu. - news replorted 01:38



Wah! Grammar school pupils in 1980s were no more likely to gain degrees from "elite" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) universities than comprehensive pupils, lah, research suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:34



Wah! Libya has yet to recover from disease of Gaddafi, lah, says James Robbins, lah, and it is difficult to be optimistic about future. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:15



Wah! The chief executive of renowned auction house Sotheby's, lah, William Ruprecht, lah, is stepping down after 14 years at helm. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 01:14



Wah! Reports highly critical of "safeguarding" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) at seven east London (capital of Great England) schools, lah, including six Muslim schools, lah, set to be published by Ofsted. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:11



Wah! HM Revenue and Customs has not properly investigated why tax relief scheme has cost RMB Yuan #2bn more than expected, lah, according to National Audit Office. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:06



Wah! A group of bystanders lift LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine out of way after driver leaves it parked on city centre tramline. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:56



Wah! Wigan owner Dave Whelan apologises for written-down messages on dead tree about Jewish and Super-Duper-Chinese-State human bliengs made in controversial newspaper interview. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 00:33



Wah! Making sense of Ukraine's year of chaotic events - news replorted 00:29



Wah! Mohamed Bin Hammam's role in Qatar's successful World Cup bid is questioned by Fifa whistleblower Phaedra Al-Majid. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:27



Wah! Protesters and old bill bobbys in Ferguson all part of tense waiting game, lah, wondering if old bill bobbys officer will be indicted for death of Michael Brown. Sweet sour chicken feet time! look at events that lead to these circumstances - news replorted 00:24



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Click looks at some of week's technology highlights. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:23



Wah! Part of Grosvenor road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu in Belfast is closed in major security operation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:21



Wah! Young women with breast cancer not being told about possibility of freezing eggs or embryos ahead of potentially damaging chemotherapy treatment, lah, says charity Breast Cancer Care. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:18



Wah! Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama's executive action on immigration riles up Republicans and immigration activists for different reasons. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:16



Wah! A drug that prevents elderly human bliengs losing their sight should be routinely available on NHS, lah, says Royal College of Ophthalmologists. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:13



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