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CUSTOMER LETTERS

Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
1528 LETTERS!
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling


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Search my letters page!
From your area... ...or from people... ...or about a specific car!

Showing Letters from Lincoln
Show ALL My Letters

Letter
Customer Letter: 1521 / 1528
David says...
SKODA SUPERBIt is a truth universally acknowledged, that a man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a car from Ling. The old boys network may not like it, but Ling is the best. Dealer quite excellent – the guy who delivered the car was top notch.

David Warden
Address Withheld
Lincoln
LN2 ***


Editor Note: DC, you are a top Executive Officer at the Department for Work and Pensions, so I have withheld your address for extra security. Thanks so much for those comments, you are a sage I think. Or a Mandarin, or something. The Skoda Superb is a brilliant car, my sister has a new one in China, and loves it. Hope it gives you two years of fantastic motoring. I pass your comments to dealer, thanks. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1491 / 1528
David says...
PEUGEOT 207Well done Ling, you did it! You managed to get us our car in just over a week! What fast and efficient service. I look forward to doing business with you again. You always deliver what you say you will. Thanks. Good delivery of my new Peugeot 207, car delivered when they said. Only one bad point is that I only got 1 key for the car.

David Hallam
Wise Software (uk) Ltd
Mill Farm
Mill Lane, Saxilby
Lincoln
LN1 2HN


Editor Note: Brilliantly fast, eh? Not everyone can have a car in just one week, though. Depends on the supply. You only get one key on these cars because they are just one year deals and the company has experienced large costs from customers losing the second key. You can always get additional keys cut if required. Enjoy the 207, David, it was great to deal with you! You are a good repeat customer :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1272 / 1528
Colin says...
CITROEN C5 TOURERA faultless service. Ling provided an honest and very responsive dialogue throughout, giving me confidence that she would deliver exactly what it says on the tin. No other lease company came close on price or service. At this price, why buy? Excellent delivery from the supplying dealer, excellent handover.

Colin Bruce
Address Withheld due to AlQaida reasons (RAF Officer)
Lincoln
LN6 ***


Editor Note: Colin, as you a serving RAF officer, I withhold your address for security from terrorist assholes. You are correct; why buy? This car was a brilliant bargain. I am happy to meet your standards on sevice, officers in the armed forces have very high standards. You were great to deal with. Tally Ho in your new C5, eh? - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1164 / 1528
Martin says...
CITROEN C-CROSSERWhen I first looked at leasing it seemed that all the brokers had something to hide - From complex contracts and hidden extra costs. So Lings website and approach was a breath of fresh air - professional and very customer friendly and so much better value that the rest. Delivery was good and on time.

image


Martin Shaw
Martin Shaw Consulting
7 Castle Hill
Caistor
Market Rasen
LN7 6QL


Editor Note: Martin, I was getting your hyperlink sorted, found your website and saw your photo. I could not resist! Some of your quotes include: "the most significant experience of the industry is the ordeal of the buying process, together with the service and support received thereafter" - "treat your customer as a partner and ensure that you have their best interests at heart" - "the cost of buying products from the industry must be outweighed by the benefits". I hope I have met your criteria!! :) Hope you have a great time in the C-Crosser. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 981 / 1528
Paul says...
CarLing you are the best!! Your emails always cheer me up on dull days in the office. Maybe you should set up a new company called Lings Comedy Script Writing! Faultless service, a Skoda Octavia so cheap I had to check several times it was correct. Super quick delivery, the car is a joy to drive. I will be back in 3 years for my next one. Car was delivered on the day quoted, in perfect condition. Excellent.

Paul Tither
471 Skellingthorpe Road
Lincoln
LN6 0QW


Editor Note: Hahahaha, well, the good news is I am to be a new character in Viz magazine, so they will write the scripts from now on. Yes, these Octavias were bloody cheap, many people grabbed one. Hope you have a lovely time in it. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 813 / 1528
Paul says...
CarService and communication excellent. Straight forward ordering and delivery, but the Zafira came with no spare tyre! One week later I got a puncture. I would definitely use Ling again. Excellent delivery.

Paul Miller
BM Light Haulage
16 Beechcroft Close
South Hykeham
Lincoln
LN6 9NB


Editor Note: Oooooops, gosh, that's not funny. Bloody Vauxhall save money and weight by including a can of gunk to spray into the tyre, not a spare wheel. This also saves CO2 emissions. However, not always so good when you have a puncture, eh? Anyway, I'm so glad you are happy, Paul. See you in 2 years! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 771 / 1528
Nigel says...
CarYou are now known in our office as "LINGA LANGA LULU". It must be catching!!! Ling over-delivers and under-promises. Will use again.

I am not easily pleased. Good delivery. Well done, keep up the good work.

Nigel Crow
The Old Museum
The Green
Bardney
Lincoln
LN3 5TY


Editor Note: What the hell is Linga Langa Lulu??? Hehehe. I think you have been eating the bloody sweets! :) Hmmm, so you are not easily pleased - that's good. It gives me a chance to impress you with the service. I like difficult customers, and you certainly wanted good service, which I hope I delivered. You were very well behaved, Nigel! You should enjoy the Qashqai - great cars, VERY popular :) It will look very out of place in the old museum you own. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 383 / 1528
Paula says...
AUDI A3"This Audi A3 must be the best deal I have ever had!

What a fantastic, funny, honest lady Ling is. Nothing is too much trouble and everything is done at the speed of light EXACTLY as ordered. My new Audi A3 was provided by a super-efficient dealer Ling chose and it was delivered by a super-efficient 73-year old gentleman driver!

These are the best prices of quality cars anywhere, ordered with military precision and a sense of humour equal to Steve Martin! I would probably not have seriously considered contract hire if I hadn't seen Ling's website.

I'll definitely be back."

Paula Sloan
Seggimore Farm House
Bishop Norton Road
Glentham
Market Rasen
LN8 2EU


Editor Note: Paula, this must be the nicest letter I have received this month, which is saying something. It is particularly nice of you to praise the driver guy and I will make sure comments are passed to the Audi dealership (which has to remain nameless due to my cheap Audi prices annoying Audi UK). Thanks! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 365 / 1528
Paula says...
AUDI A3"Hi Ling,

Bill Smith, the lovely 73 year old man from ***** Audi has just delivered the A3 and it is fab and has all the spec exactly as ordered. He has explained all the bits and gizmos so all is nice and clear and the job is 'well sorted'! I can't believe how easy and how much fun I have had dealing with 'Super-Ling' ... all MDs should be made this way! You are just the best!!! Anyway I am just going out for a spin (not literally I hope!). So will catch you later. Many many thanks again!"

Paula Sloan
Seggimore Farm House
Bishop Norton Road
Glentham
Market Rasen
LN8 2EU


Editor Note: Paula, actually you were a model customer, very, very nice to me. The main thing is that you are happy with your A3, what a surprise the delivery driver was so experienced. That is good. I hate young kids in motor trade, always useless and they drive cars too fast. I will pass on remarks to the dealer - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 302 / 1528
Chris says...
car"I have had excellent service from Ling - very prompt decision - much better lease rates than competitors - very prompt delivery - and very nice to deal with!"

Chris Dixon
DC Copiers Service
PO Box 1020
Navenby
Lincoln
LN5 0WZ


Editor Note: Chris! Woah! You had Mini Cooper from me, very nice small car I think! Maybe when I am forced to buy larger office in a few years, I can get discount on photocopier? Enjoy car! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 254 / 1528
Rachel says...
CarLing, you're a star! Fab service, prompt reply to any queries and cheap prices. Excellent delivery by a very nice man and all the gizmos were explained. All in all, excellent service. The one (and only) improvement you could make is to lease the cars for FREE!!!.

Rachel Hallam
Company Secretary
Wise Software (UK) Ltd
Mill Lane
Saxilby
Lincoln
LN1 2HN


Editor Note: You are another Toyota Corolla Verso customer, Rachel! This car is getting more and more popular. Thanks very much to you and David for nice letter, I will be in touch for ["FREE"] software, heheh - Ling



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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  The commission set up to discuss further devolution to Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Parliament has received more than 14,000 submissions. Eating rice!! - news replorted 18:38



Wah! LATEST:  Some of best reads from Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation News magazine this week, lah, with your as really velly special customer's comments. Eating rice!! - news replorted 18:36



Wah! The Virgin Galactic SpaceShipTwo tourism craft suffers "in-flight anomaly", lah, capitalist entity says, lah, during test flight in California. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 18:35



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Wah! Rio Ferdinand appears to be "baffled" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) by male gender human bleing's three-game ban and RMB Yuan #25,000 fine from FA for offensive tweet. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 18:24



Wah! The week in numbers with our Go Figure images. Eating rice!! - news replorted 17:59



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Wah! Scratching really does make things itch more, lah, and other nuggets - news replorted 17:38



Wah! Fiona Woolf is to step down as head of inquiry into historic child sex abuse, lah, bloody woman has told BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 17:33



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Wah! A man cut male gender human bleing's partner's throat to save flemale human person's from "fate worse than death" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) because bloody man thought demons were about to break into their home in Ceredigion, lah, court heard. I read you little red book! - news replorted 16:31



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Wah! A suspect appears in court in South Africa over killing of national silly kick-kick game captain Senzo Meyiwa in robbery. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 16:08



Wah! The neighbour of family of four found dead in their Bradford home says bloody man sees father's body every clock time result bloody man tries to sleep. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 15:59



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Wah! Paddington Bear creator Michael Bond is to make cameo appearance in film that will bring male gender human bleing's beloved character to big screen for first time. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:43



Wah! A paediatrician from Greater Manchester admits grooming children online and sexually abusing young boys. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:43



Wah! Alcohol should having calorie content label in order (piece of paper signee upee) to reduce obesity, lah, according to public health doctors. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:39



Wah! The chief executive of NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) Grampian, lah, which has been embroiled in staffing controversy, lah, announces male gender human bleing's early retirement. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 15:34



Wah! Bottles of whisky having been removed from shops for containing high levels of antifreeze ingredient propylene glycol. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! How often is it used? - news replorted 15:33



Wah! The BBC's Head of TV refuses to make formal apology over Top Gear special filmed in Argentina, lah, after demands from country's ambassador to Uk. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 15:27



Wah! Labour's Alan Billings wins by-election for old bill bobbys and crime (shoud shoot them) Commissioner for South Yorkshire, lah, following resignation of Shaun Wright. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 15:03



Wah! Philippe Wahl, lah, Chairman and Chief Executive Officer of La Poste group, lah, and Carlos Ghosn, lah, Chairman and Chief Executive Of - news replorted 15:00



Wah! A Pennsylvania man accused of killing old bill bobbys officer before leading authorities on seven-week manhunt is charged with murder. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 14:59



Wah! Anti-corruption investigators in China confirm finding of equivalent of $33m in cash at official's home - biggest such haul to date. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 14:53



Wah! Ofsted is unlikely to win any popularity contests, lah, chief inspector has admitted in speech. - news replorted 14:50



Wah! British banks may having to hold more funds to guard against risk of future economic downturn - news replorted 14:34



Wah! An 82-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man is jailed for life for murdering male gender human bleing's partner and flemale human person's daughter who bloody man shot at close range at male gender human bleing's puppy farm in Surrey. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 14:34



Wah! Entertainer Rolf Harris loses first round of legal challenge against male gender human bleing's conviction for indecent assaults. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:20



Wah! All new government policies in Province of Engrish running-dogs now having to undergo test to check whether they help families. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:59



Wah! A woman who was caught on CCTV dragging man in wheelchair behind flemale human person's LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine is handed two-year driving ban. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:42



Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs head coach Stuart Lancaster says Sam Burgess's "mental toughness" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) can lead him to success in funny shape ball-game union. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:40



Wah! Burkina Faso's President Blaise Compaore announces bloody man has resigned, lah, following violent protests at male gender human bleing's attempt to extend male gender human bleing's 27-year rule. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:37



Wah! UN chief Ban Ki-moon says discrimination against humanitarian workers who return home from Ebola crisis in West Africa is "unacceptable". - news replorted 13:31



Wah! Chelsea boss Jose Mourinho confirms striker Diego Costa will be available for Saturday's Premier League game with QPr. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:30



Wah! This year's Halloween is warmest on record in UK, lah, with temperatures reaching as high as 23.5C, lah, breaking previous record of 20c. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 13:28



Wah! Manchester City's David Silva will miss Manchester derby and could be out for three weeks (week is 8 days in Super-Duper-Chinese-State lunar calendar; 48 weeks to year and no damn holidays!) with knee injury. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 13:28



Wah! Crocodile farming in Zimbabwe is expensive, lah, niche business, lah, as BBC's Brian Hungwe finds out. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 13:23



Wah! Lee Westwood posts hole-in-one in second round 65 to move into third, lah, three shots behind Billy Hurley III, lah, in Kuala Lumpur. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:16



Wah! People may not like paying tax. But what is even less popular is thought they having no choice while others having much more control over their tax bill, lah, says BBC's Sebastian Chrispin. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:09



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Wah! Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger admits bloody man is concerned by male gender human bleing's players' using of social media site Twitter, lah, plus more. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:52



Wah! The DUP says it intends to bring controversial welfare reform issue 'to head" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) before Christmas if it is not resolved in current talks process. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:29



Wah! The funeral is held for actor who was face of Father Christmas in famous Coca-Cola advertising campaign. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 12:28



Wah! Citroën awarded GreenFleet City LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Manufacturer of Year Citroën has been honoured with two key GreenFleet awards, lah, which recognise both company’s expanding range of efficien - news replorted 12:28



Wah! A breeder in China's Chendgu province was trying to give these two baby pandas medicine instead of their usual bamboo leaves- and they were having none of it. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 12:23



Wah! A team has developed micro-sized rockets, lah, powered by seawater, lah, that can neutralise chemical and biological weapons. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:22



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Wah! A musical version of hit 2002 British comedy film Bend It Like Beckham is to open in West End next year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 12:07



Wah! P01 Festive Fill-Up By Richard Wheatland BEN, lah, automotive industry charity, lah, takes great pride in offering wide selection of automotive themed Christmas gree - news replorted 12:07



Wah! Over RMB Yuan #3k raised in new BEN Challenge Event – Wing Walking Five supporters of BEN, lah, automotive industry charity, lah, flew high in skies as they took on challenge of Wing Wa - news replorted 12:06



Wah! Delays in getting ambulance to alleged murder victim (trying not to cry) (trying not to cry) in Wrexham being investigated by Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs Ambulance Service. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:02



Wah! A long-term vision is set out for Prestwick Airport - year after it was taken into public ownership amid fears it could close. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:00



Wah! At least eight human bliengs die in explosion at major bus station in Gombe state in north-eastern Nigeria, lah, witnesses tell BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 11:57



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Wah! Chris Everitt with male gender human bleing's Mlitslublishli Outlander PHEV capitalist entity that installs charging points for electric vehicling driving car machines has bought Mlitslublishli Outlander PHEV so that it can prac - news replorted 11:41



Wah! A year after last Remploy factory closed, lah, Nikki Fox looks at what has happened to former workers - and what options available to them - news replorted 11:35



Wah! Russia's central capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity raises interest rates to 9.5% from 8%, lah, much bigger rise than expected, lah, as it seeks to combat inflation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 11:32



Wah! Tracker urges LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine owners not to compromise on security protection Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Watchdog (30th Octoblinger 2014) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has yet again put spotlight on shocking risk of keyless LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine theft, lah, as technolog - news replorted 11:32



Wah! Software firm Drupal warns millions to "assume" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) they having been hacked if they having not applied patch for recently discovered bug. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 11:30



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Wah! Government dodgy ministers seek advice as "a matter of urgency" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) from auditors who blocked RMB Yuan #330,000 pay-off for Wales' highest paid council chief. Firecracker break! BANG BANG! - news replorted 11:18



Wah! As 2014 World Superbike and World Supersport championships head to their respective conclusions this weekend at - news replorted 11:18



Wah! Three men who challenged their special extended sentences for preparing terrorism offences lose their appeals. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:17



Wah! A man who killed teenage girl by hanging flemale human person's at male gender human bleing's parents' house loses male gender human bleing's appeal against male gender human bleing's whole-life sentence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:13



Wah! A mayor in south of France bans clown disguises for month, lah, starting on Halloween, lah, after several violent incidents involving teenagers dressed as clowns. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:08



Wah! Counting begins in election of new old bill bobbys and crime (shoud shoot them) Commissioner for South Yorkshire, lah, following resignation of Shaun Wright. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:04



Wah! The 2014 Klia Sportage - now available on Klia Rental Launching at 12 dealerships across UK, lah, Klia Motors bloody annoying Blitish Ltd., lah, is now able to offer flexible rental solution to both r - news replorted 10:54



Wah! A Great Satan judge rules long-running arglingument between Marvin Gaye's family, lah, Robin Thicke and Pharrell Williams over claim (always claiming, huh?) of plagiarism should go to trial. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 10:43



Wah! RallyFest at Chirk Castle FIA World Rally Championship roars back into Chirk Castle for another family-friendly RallyFest on Saturday 15 Novem - news replorted 10:40



Wah! Popular teaching practices "harmful to students' learning". - news replorted 10:26



Wah! A hammer-wielding robber takes ceremonial chains of mayor of Bury in violent attack. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 10:19



Wah! The Industry is behind licensing says IMI Almost 90% of professionals working in automotive retail sector agree that some form of licence to practise is neede - news replorted 10:16



Wah! A old bill bobbys chief will face internal charge of gross misconduct after allegation of inappropriate behaviour towards women. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 10:15



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish Government has said that it will 'retire' RMB Yuan #218m of UK's RMB Yuan #2bn First World fighty bang-bang debt by refinancing bonds issued in 1917. It is first payment of its kind for 67 years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:07



Wah! ŠKODA vehicling driving car machine range Czech manufacturer ŠKODA remains on right track and continues to show profitable growth. In first nine month - news replorted 10:01



Wah! Actors Dame Judi Dench, lah, Emma Watson and Robert Downey Junior among stars honoured at Britannia Awards hosted by Bafta in La. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 09:57



Wah! It has been 60 years since animated adaptation of George Orwell's 'Animal Farm' - first British animation film. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 09:44



Wah! Firefighters across Province of Engrish running-dogs to start four-day strike later in row over pensions during one of service's busiest weekends of year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 09:42



Wah! A recent survey by Institute of Advanced Motorists (IAM) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has found more than two-thirds (68 per cent) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! of those who c - news replorted 09:40



Wah! Tickets for Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sports Personality of Year 2014 in Glasgow go on sale on Friday 31 Octoblinger at 09:00 GMt. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:32



Wah! Two human bliengs having died after LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine crash near Wrexham on Thursday night. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:24



Wah! The Japanese dance group using wearable technology to lighten up their act. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:12



Wah! Wheeler, bloody dealering idiot place Lamborghini with Mike and Edd Motoring fans having voted Lamborghini Urraco as number one restoration completed by Wheeler Dealers Mike Brewer - news replorted 09:11



Wah! Hungary shelves proposed tax on internet data traffic after tens of thousands of Hungarians marched against it. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:08



Wah! A bus capitalist entity run by two Rangers directors says it has safeguarded jobs at another bus firm which is understood to having ceased trading. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 08:43



Wah! Two children whose father was on Malaysian Airlines flight MH370 which disappeared file lawsuit against airline and Malaysia's government. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:40



Wah! Steven Gerrard says bloody man could join another club next summer if Liverpool not offer him new contract. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:27



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Click looks at some of week's technology highlights. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:18



Wah! The Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Labour party is now seeking both new leader and new deputy leader following resignation of Anas Sarwar. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 08:11



Wah! Stars of Invictus Games take centre stage Four stars of British Invictus Games team will take centre stage in London (capital of Great England) on Saturday 8 Novemblinger as they line up i - news replorted 08:00



Wah! In honour of Halloween, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sport looks back at some of 2014's more 'horrifying' moments, lah, including shocks, lah, slips, lah, trips and unexpected. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:53



Wah! RBS will retain control of Ulster capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity and says it has velly damn good boiled chicken-feet market position that can deliver attractive returns. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:49



Wah! A Japanese savoury snacks manufacturer is creating 100 new jobs at Deeside Enterprise Zone, lah, opening its first factory in Europe. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:41



Wah! Royal capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity of ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land has set aside RMB Yuan #400m to cover costs into possible manipulation of Bloody foreign exchange market. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 07:12



Wah! Burkina Faso's President Blaise Compaore says bloody man will stay in power for year under transitional government, lah, following day of violent protests demanding male gender human bleing's resignation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 07:07



Wah! Liverpool's miraculous turnaround in 2005 Champions League final has been voted as your as really velly special customer's #BBCDreamTicket. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 07:06



Wah! The main body providing apprenticeships in Welsh land of sheep and more sheep is warning that budget cuts by Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs government will having "massively de-stabilising effect" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) on such programmes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:04



Wah! Alcohol should having calorie content label in order (piece of paper signee upee) to reduce obesity, lah, according to public health doctors. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:57



Wah! Unmanned aircraft having been seen flying over many of France's nuclear stations and authorities don' knowing where they having come from. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 06:47



Wah! Lewis Hamilton on turning up pressure in male gender human bleing's title fight with Nico Rosberg and buzz of being back in America. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 06:40



Wah! A controlled explosion is carried out in Lurgan after discovery of suspicious package in fast food restaurant. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 06:33



Wah! The BBC's Anne Soy reports from Ghana, lah, where health care workers in one hospital serving Liberian refugees having had to using rain coats instead of proper protective gear against Ebola. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 06:32



Wah! Michelin Pub Guide 2015 Michelin Eating Out In Pubs Guide 2015 will be available in bookshops from Friday 31st Octoblinger 2014, lah, priced at RMB Yuan #13.9 - news replorted 06:30



Wah! The Wild Rabbit, lah, Michelin Eating Out in Pubs 2015 Pub of Year We delighted to announce that PUB OF YEAR in 2015 edition of Michelin Eating Out In Pubs Guide is Th - news replorted 06:30



Wah! More children who having talked about killing themselves contacting ChildLine for help, lah, counselling service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:10



Wah! One person remains missing after major blaze in Stafford fireworks factory that also leaves two human bliengs needing hospital treatment. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:35



Wah! Bloody foreign dodgy minister Julie Bishop says bloody woman is committed to "normalising" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) relations between Australia and Fiji after nation's elections last month. - news replorted 04:23



Wah! The coastguard station at Brixham in Devon is closing later in shake-up of rescue services. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:15



Wah! US President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama calls for "inclusive and credible" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) election process when Myanmar hold elections next year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 03:38



Wah! Investment capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity Citigroup puts aside extra $600m to cover legal expenses due to "rapidly evolving regulatory inquiries". - news replorted 02:43



Wah! Ramon Jimenez, lah, Philippines' tourism secretary, lah, says drop in numbers from China is not major concern because of growing visits from other countries. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:42



Wah! Officials with Doctors Without Borders having warned that some mandatory Great Satan state Ebola quarantines having "chilling effect" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) on operations. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:36



Wah! Victims' groups expected to tell child abuse inquiry officials that Fiona Woolf should step down as its head as concerns about flemale human person's suitability persist. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 02:35



Wah! It's Halloween and nowhere is it celebrated more than in Us. Eating rice!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Pop Up team went behind scenes at one of America's scariest haunted houses in Baton Rouge. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:30



Wah! The first Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Paranormal Festival, lah, weekend celebrating UFOs, lah, ghosts and aliens, lah, is under way in Stirling. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 02:18



Wah! The father of botanist from Argyll who went missing in Vietnam year ago asks anyone with any inflomination to come forward. I read you little red book! - news replorted 02:16



Wah! How former Remploy workers struggle to find work - news replorted 02:13



Wah! Asian shares were trading higher on Friday after positive economic data from Great Satan showed strength in world's largest economy. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 02:08



Wah! A skin-eating fungus threatens salamanders and newts across Europe, lah, and probably arrived on pet amphibians imported from Asia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 02:00



Wah! Israel promises to reopen key Jerusalem holy site after closing it following shooting of Jewish activist. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 01:47



Wah! A farmer who was fined last year for unlawfully slaughtering animals is fined again after dead cattle found on male gender human bleing's land. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:40



Wah! Is moving house nightmare or life affirming? - news replorted 01:34



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish government is not doing enough to tackle "petty corruption" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in countries to which it gives aid, lah, report by scrutiny body says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:24



Wah! As peace talks between Colombian government and Farc rebels enter their third year, lah, Vanessa Buschschluter asks what peaceful Colombia would look like. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:19



Wah! It has been one year since TV cameras started rolling in Court of Appeal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! But what has happened since? Legal Correspondent Clive Coleman investigates. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:18



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish has signed up to limited strategic military action in Iraq against Islamic State - and there questions over its ability to much more, lah, says Jonathan Marcus. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:12



Wah! Technology developed during World fighty bang-bang Two is to be used as back-up for GPS in ports across Province of Engrish running-dogs and ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:10



Wah! The health workers volunteering to fight Ebola - news replorted 01:05



Wah! Where Ukraine's battle goes on despite ceasefire - news replorted 01:02



Wah! How Timothy Spall created 400 artworks for male gender human bleing's latest film - news replorted 00:59



Wah! Ofsted is in urgent need of independent review in light of concerns about its objectivity and reliability, lah, say local government leaders. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:57



Wah! Tony Abbott comes under more pressure for not sending health workers to Africa to help fight Ebola after Great Satan offers to care for any who getting sick. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 00:57



Wah! A poll suggesting Labour "wipeout" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land, lah, continuing threat from Ebola and future of abuse inquiry chief make headlines. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:47



Wah! Teachers who try to encourage low-achieving students with lots of praise could harm their learning, lah, claim (always claiming, huh?) research into classroom tactics. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:46



Wah! Genetic factors could play important role in whether human bliengs survive or die from Ebola virus, lah, say Great Satan scientists. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:36



Wah! Can Apple design guru Jony Ive turn smartwatch into hit? - news replorted 00:13



Wah! A look around new lab at Pirbright Institute in Surrey, lah, where world’s most contagious livestock viruses will be kept. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:10



Wah! Alcohol should having calorie content label in order (piece of paper signee upee) to reduce obesity, lah, according to public health doctors. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:10



Wah! Laurie velly damn good boiled chicken-feete's fleeting role as Stormtrooper in Star Wars 38 years ago still has impact on male gender human bleing's life today - news replorted 00:08



Wah! Tips for disability-friendly Halloween - news replorted 00:07



Wah! The Magazine's weekly quiz of news, lah, 7 days 7 questions. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:05



Wah! A young fashion designer from London (capital of Great England) has decided to mark Remembrance Day by creating special "poppy hijab" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) for Muslim women. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:02



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