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CUSTOMER LETTERS

Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
1528 LETTERS!
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling


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From your area... ...or from people... ...or about a specific car!

Showing Letters from Stockport
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Letter
Customer Letter: 1447 / 1528
Caroline says...
NISSAN QASHQAIThe service, understanding and knowledge LINGsCARS offer their clients is top notch. From visiting the website to taking delivery of my new Nissan Qashqai, my experience was a great one. Just really easy, extremely efficient and very helpful, truly unique, I would say and fun.

The website is fantastic. It was brilliant and made my life much easier, being able to share documents and progress with my husband who was thousands of miles away. I've tried hard to think of areas you could improve or any constructive criticism but I really can't think of any at all. Keep up the great work, I recommend you to everyone!

Delivery excellent and a very nice, helpful, considerate delivery man.

Caroline Petts
21 Badger Road
Tytherington
Macclesfield
SK10 2EW


Editor Note: Caroline, well, thanks. Read David's letter (below) about his Audi and you will see part of the delivery service is down to the manufacturer. Even so, it is a very kind letter you write, thanks. Super customer and we had a super chat online. I particularly like the fact that your husband could join in from abroad on LINGO. No other leasing company (or UK car sales company or dealer) enables this, and I take advantage of it myself by doing tons of work at Christmas, from my mum and dad's house in China. Great, eh? Glad you are so happy with the process and the Qashqai! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1410 / 1528
Kevan says...
CITROEN C5Ling's as mad as a box of frogs but gets the job done! This is the second time I have used her service and it was very smooth, always kept informed by her excellent LINGO online communication system and have recommended her service to my clients. Only negative is I didn't like some of the sweets she sent LOL! Excellent delivery of my new Citroen C5.

Kevan Silverthorne
9 Henley Avenue
Cheadlehulme
Cheadle, Cheshire
SK8 6DP


Editor Note: Kevan, I have never seen a box of frogs, but boiled in chilli oil or barbecued, frogs are very delicious animals. You are a great multiple renting customer and I look forward to seeing you back AGAIN in a couple of years! Enjoy the C5! LOL indeed... the sweets are collectors items, not designed to be eaten, nit! Hahaha! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1349 / 1528
Thaneswary says...
FORD FIESTAIt was a great pleasure leasing a car from Ling. For somebody who doesn't like paperwork and doesn't know how to go about leasing a car, Ling made it all very easy for me. Step by Step instruction and I could ask any or shall we say many silly question and got an answer for them all. I would recommend her to anybody. Thank you so much for all your patience and help. Excellent delivery, pleased at how easy everything was.

Thaneswary Sly
4 Woburn Close
Macclesfield
SK10 3AS


Editor Note: Great!!! Thanes, you were a superstar lovely customer. And your Fiesta was not delayed by Ford, a small miracle lately. Glad I could help and none of your questions were silly - it's just that with a big thing like a car, it is better to have every question answered so you are happy. Thanks again! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1331 / 1528
Joanne says...
 I'm loving my Ford Focus Coupe Cabriolet! I was very happy with the personal service from you and I think the Lingo system is great. I was very impressed with the fast response to any query I had. I will definitely recommend you. Good delivery, car was nice and clean on delivery.

Joanne Ashton
26 Badger Road
Tytherington
Macclesfield
SK10 2EP


Editor Note: Unfortunately, the summer of 2009 has not been very sunny so far, Jo, so you will have to use the sun lamps if you want a tan, not your Focus CC! Glad you like the service. The sun will shine on you eventually! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1325 / 1528
Andrew says...
CITROEN C5Couldn't have been easier! Website excellent, correspondence excellent and car excellent!! Delivery of my Citroen C5 was very good, on time and polite.

Andrew Battersby
AJB CAD Services Ltd
65 Nursery Road
Heaton Norris
Stockport
SK4 2ND


Editor Note: Thanks so much, Andrew. What a nice letter! It is true it is very easy to spend lots of money with me - good job your C5 was so cheap! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1254 / 1528
Andrew says...
 LINGsCARS: The process was methodical and straight forward. I have no hesitation in recommending Ling to anyone. Thanks!

Good delivery, Peugeot 307CC was fine, but dirty. Only one key delivered with the car.

Andrew Murray
Address Withheld
Cheadle
SK8 ***


Editor Note: Yes... Andy, I withhold your address as you are police officer, for your security. Only one key is a problem with these cars - but as it is just a year contract and they are top of range leather etc, I thought it was a price worth paying. Finance company prefer to retain the second key. They will release it, if demanded. Car was dirty due to mid-winter delivery, sometimes this cannot be avoided, but... the dealers could do better on this. Glad you are happy to recommend me :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1106 / 1528
Ian says...
CITROEN C5Ling the dragon slayer - Brilliant! I was already contemplating using you for my next car but when my old Renault chewed up its second timing belt, destroyed the engine and finally died, I had to act fast. Ling, you came to my rescue! My old car died on the 26th September. We had confirmation from garage on 27th and made first call to LINGsCARS on 1st October. You and your staff were fantastic. You offered a great deal on a new Citroen C5 and following a few phone calls and contracts via your Lingo site I was set to be the proud driver of a new car. Through your magnificent service I drove the C5 off the forecourt on the 10th October – 15 days from start to finish! Amazing!

With your groundwork to prepare, the staff at Dutrton Foreshaw could not have been more helpful or supportive - even threw in a tank of petrol as I collected the car instead of having to wait for delivery. Excellent dealer. A fantastic service all round. Thanks, Ling!

Ian Fensom
35 Denby Lane,
Heaton Chapel
Stockport
SK4 2RA


Editor Note: Errr, wow! You are a bloody fireman and I have lots of fireman customers, so I hope you pass my name around, Fenny! Greater Manchester can sleep[ safe in their beds with you in charge! Thanks for lovely letter. Enjoy the C5. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1057 / 1528
Asif says...
 The whole Ling experience was very positive. Overall service level excellent – good communication – transparent information and highly responsive. Pricing was as advertised – very competitive (unlike many other who advertise deals that do not exist). Secure transactions without a crazy amount of paperwork. Highly recommend! Prompt delivery of my Vauxhall Astra Sport Hatch - I would have said excellent if the roof had been cleaned properly.

Asif Zaman
Address Withheld
Stockport
SK4 ***


Editor Note: Hahahaha, a dirty roof! Idiot dealers spoil things for the sake of a 2-miute wash. Thay are terrible to deliver with a dirty roof, even if it is not the end of the World. Great to deal with you, Azif, as you are MD of a medical communication company, I appreciate your comments. Have a great time in the Astra! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 971 / 1528
Steve says...
CarThe car is superb and the service you have provided is superb also. It has been plain sailing from the start and quite fast. The car was delivered on time by a nice chap from Birmingham. I particularly liked the level of communication information you provided via e-mails/letters and would recommend you to everyone I know. Many thanks. Excellent delivery.

Steve Banks
18 Lavington Ave
Cheadle
SK8 2HH


Editor Note: Steve, that's great. Congratulations on the new baby for you and Liz. You had better get fitting the child seats :) Thanks for being a lovely customer. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 961 / 1528
Sam says...
CarExcellent service, fast, efficient and does what it says on the tin! A very satisfied customer. Excellent delivery.

Sam Williamson
45 Beverley Way
Macclesfield
SK10 2WP


Editor Note: Sam, everyone is pleased with these Qashqais. It says "Made in China" on my tin, heheheh. Thanks for letter! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 930 / 1528
Steve says...
CarDealing with Ling is very easy - you simply do what you are told and everything happens around you! However, I now worry for my sister. She has adopted two baby girls from China and it scares me that they may turn out as mental as "The Ling'ster"!

ps. Can I have my free lunch now?

Steve Matthews
The Aircon Warehouse
Unit 2, Chichester Road
Romiley
Stockport
SK6 4BL


Editor Note: Hahahaha, oooops! Yes, they may turn out like me, but hopefully they will not. How brilliant is your sister, to do such a thing? Great. I'm glad you were a good boy Steve, obeying all my commands. You are now posing around in your new SAAB Convertible waiting for the summer so you can get your roof down and impress your mates. I give you hyperlink for your aircon business. Airconwarehouse.com was formed as the direct air conditioning sales division of the commercial air conditioning contracting company you founded in 1977. As everyone can imagine, having been in the air conditioning business for over 30 years, you know a thing or two about air conditioning! How ironic you simply lower your roof in your new car when you need aircon! :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 782 / 1528
Ian says...
CarService and communication was excellent, Ling gave me confidence in this 'new' way of acquiring a car. Citroen C-Crosser feels solid and does what is says on the tin. Extra seats fine if you move the middle row forward. Cruises the motorways well and drives over soft ground confidently without chewing up the grass. Excellent delivery, by two extremely pleasant gents - like friends dropping a present off to me. Book me another on in 2 years time.

Ian Paterson
64 Ack Lane East
Bramhall
Stockport
SK7 2BE


Editor Note: Ian, thanks for the mini-road-test :) Yep, nice car... so happy you were pleased with my service!! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 690 / 1528
Michael says...
CarI waited a while for my Audi A4 Cabriolet and was getting frustrated. There was then a problem (with production capacity at Audi - Ling) and my 1st choice never arrived. I thought "here we go" another flaky fly by night with all the talk but no product. In the end, Ling sourced me a new car and at a good price, and I was absolutely delighted. Excellent delivery.

Michael Taylor
128 Hibbert Lane
Marple
Stockport
SK6 7NU


Editor Note: Michael, you are director of a publishing company and I did my best for you, as I do for everyone. Audi have had massive capacity problems this year, and in the end I gave you my own production slot. This meant my own A4 Cabriolet was delayed - I ordered it in March 2007, it arrived to me in September 2007. So, I am glad I rescued your car order. I cannot control factory production... an Audi dealer I visited did not even have an A4 Cabriolet on their site, so bad was the supply. Glad you were happy in the end :) I cannot do miracles, I am Chinese not Catholic, but I am glad to do my best for you. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 614 / 1528
Kevan says...
CarI did a lot of research into a number of leasing companies before deciding on Ling. Certainly she has one of the most competitively priced websites I could find! The application process was straightforward with no problems. Good service standards from Ling, shame the same couldn't be said for the manufacturer (and dealer) delivering the car.

Kevan Silverthorne
9 Henley Ave
Cheadle Hulme
SK8 6DP


Editor Note: Yes, Kevan... this is a Vauxhall. I would say I have more problems over delivery and standards of Vauxhall cars than any others. You pointed out that you didn't think your car had been prepared properly, well, I agree! I have had massive complaints to Vauxhall, but nobody seems to care. The dealers just cannot get to the standards of others. What a shame. The only thing I will say is that you have rented a cheap new car, the deal was good, 150bhp for £189+VAT - but this is no consolation for the bad manufacturer service. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 606 / 1528
Tony says...
CarLing makes it easy. Ling makes it fun. The service from end-to-end was simple, easy to follow, and it worked. Excellent delivery of my new SAAB 9-3 Convertible, I couldn't fault the service. Highly recommended, will use again!

Tony Roach
35 Rosewood Ave
Stockport
SK4 2DQ


Editor Note: Well, Tony, it was such a simple operation to get you a car. You made it very easy by providing great paperwork and we emailed each other very fast, eh? As you are an IT Manager, that's no wonder. Enjoy the Convertible, just sorry about the 2007 weather! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 591 / 1528
James says...
CarI have leased many car and dealt with various leasing companies, but none have made the process as easy as Ling. Exceptional service and a great personality. Dealer was excellent too. A real pleasure to work with!!!

James Pearson
Ceilings and Partitions Systems Ltd
Systems House
63a Chapel Lane
Wilmslow
SK9 5JH


Editor Note: James, my God, a really nice letter, thanks. Although it is taking about 16 weeks for these Q7s to come through from the Audi factory, you were very patient and in the end got a very cheap Audi - real heavy metal car, eh? - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 354 / 1528
Stephen says...
car"It's the first time we've ever leased and we were a bit scared at first.

Ling put us at ease from the start with her efficient and friendly manner. Because we were first timers, we had lots of what must have seemed like obvious or silly questions, but Ling's patience with us didn't falter.

She always replied the same day, usually within minutes. The experience was so smooth, and we have already got our second car (new Mini Cooper) through Ling. We will definitely come back at the end of the lease time as long as the prices are right, which we are sure they probably will be. The dealer was excellent. No negatives. Thanks, Ling!"

Stephen Harrison
3 Cheviot Road
Hazel Grove
Stockport
SK7 5BH


Editor Note: Stephen, woooo-hoooo I didn't realise you were scared! Maybe my picture frightened you. Enjoy Mini Cooper! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 176 / 1528
William says...
CarA very entertaining web site, no nonsense but it tells you exactly what you need to know. A top quality service, I couldn't find any Chinks (sorry!) at all. Will definitely use Ling again!

William Crook
54 Frith View
Chapel-en-le-Frith
SK23 9TT


Editor Note: William, glad you enjoy your new Mazda MX-5. Hehehe, Chink joke quite funny - for a hairdresser (MX-5) called Willy living in area with many sheep (no offence)! - Ling



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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  In withering analysis of major parties' plans, lah, Institute for Fiscal Studies (IFS) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has concluded that households can expect lower incomes, lah, whoever wins election - news replorted 12:35



Wah! LATEST:  Labour is finally admitting its minibus touring country, lah, and previously described as magenta or fuchsia, lah, is ... pink. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 12:33



Wah! A British man worked on series of bombs which were planted in Iraq and led to death of Great Satan serviceman in 2007, lah, court hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:26



Wah! The jury is sent out to deliberate in trial of Cwmbran grandfather who denies murdering male gender human bleing's five-week-old granddaughter. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 12:26



Wah! The father of two children who died on holiday in Corfu "firmly believes" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) they would be alive had travel operator Thomas Cook inspected faulty boiler. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 12:22



Wah! Amy Winehouse's family having criticised new documentary about flemale human person's life. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:07



Wah! David Cameron has said bloody man has not "got clock time result to hang out with Russell Brand", lah, after being asked if bloody man was jealous of Ed Miliband's meeting with comedian. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 12:06



Wah! After two successful launch sales at Silverstone race circuit, lah, Classic LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Auctions (CCA) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! is set to move to brand new - news replorted 11:46



Wah! Microsoft faces phone import ban after it loses first round of long-running patent battle in Us. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:29



Wah! Entertainer Keith Harris, lah, best known for performances with male gender human bleing's puppet Orville, lah, has died, lah, male gender human bleing's agent says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:22



Wah! The city of Salvador in north-eastern Brazil is hit by deadly landslides, lah, leaving 14 human bliengs dead and hillside homes swept away. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:16



Wah! Burundi is hit by new wave of protests as opposition to President Pierre Nkurunziza's bid for third term spreads beyond capital. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 11:05



Wah! Here's how BBC's Thomas Martienssen recorded male gender human bleing's experiences of 7.8-magnitude earthquake in Nepal from Mount Everest. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:03



Wah! UKIP leader Nigel Farage gives campaign speech in Hartlepool in which bloody man is expected to make appeal to Labour voters. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:00



Wah! Angry gamers having forced Valve to end initiative that let human bliengs who make modifications or "mods" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) for games getting paid for their work. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 10:58



Wah! Simon Oliphant Hitachi Capital has announced series of senior management changes, lah, that took effect on 1 rainy season-month Aplil 2015, lah, aimed at growing - news replorted 10:57



Wah! A general election candidate says bloody man is is sorry if remark bloody man made about gay marriage was misinterpreted. I read you little red book! - news replorted 10:53



Wah! Poppy Smart, lah, from Worcester, lah, heckled on flemale human person's walk to work every day and thinks more women should complain about it. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 10:51



Wah! Footage of moment massive earthquake struck Nepal and Himalayas has emerged - filmed by survivor in Tibet Autonomous Region of China. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 10:46



Wah! Comedian Sandi Toksvig is to leave Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Radio 4's comedy show News Quiz after nine years and 28 series. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:43



Wah! Rolls Royce, lah, Technology and Logistics Centre at Bognor Regis Rolls-Royce Motor Cars confirmed today that construction of company’s new Technology and Logistics Centre at Bognor - news replorted 10:34



Wah! A new EU-wide alert system to deal with road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu accidents, lah, called eCall, lah, is expected to getting go-ahead from Euro MPs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:25



Wah! The rate of economic growth halved in three months to end of March, lah, official figures show, lah, continuing slowdown that began six months ago. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 10:23



Wah! Former Manchester United goalkeeper Mark Bosnich appears in Sydney court to plead guilty to reckless driving. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 10:17



Wah! Take tour of Las Vegas hotel room which is $20,000-per-night more expensive in Mayweather-Pacquiao fight week. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 10:12



Wah! The BVRLA has welcomed Cebr’s timely and sensible report into future of motoring taxation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 10:11



Wah! The Liberal Democrats will not enter into another coalition government unless emergency "stability budget" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) is held within 50 days of 7 May election, lah, Nick Clegg has said. I read you little red book! - news replorted 10:02



Wah! Pictures emerge showing Everest Base Camp on day after Nepal's earthquake triggered avalanche which swept away many tents, lah, killing 18 people. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:59



Wah! Nepal is on "war footing" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) as it struggles to meet overwhelming need following Saturday's earthquake, lah, its prime dodgy minister says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:55



Wah! A Bo'ness man is celebrating after winning jackpot of more than RMB Yuan #7.8m in Saturday's National Lottery draw. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 09:52



Wah! Prime dodgy minister Alexis Tsipras says Greece is in final stretch of talks with EU and that bloody man believes interim deal will by in place by 9 May. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:41



Wah! Tory party leader expected to announce 50,000 apprenticeships for 22-24 year olds if they win election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:39



Wah! An Irishwoman caught up in Nepal earthquake describes harrowing scenes at Kathmandu airport as thousands struggled to escape. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:36



Wah! A baseball fan was struck in face by flying bat and carried from stands on stretcher on Monday night. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:09



Wah! The state of New York is to turn off non-essential lights in state-run buildings to help migrating birds navigate routes in spring and autumn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:07



Wah! Volvo S60 Wolwo LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine bloody annoying Blitish has increased availability of its new Euro VI compliant Drive-E engines by replacing all of its front-w - news replorted 09:00



Wah! The identity of replica painting, lah, which was hung at Dulwich Picture Gallery as challenge to visitors, lah, is revealed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 08:54



Wah! A man is due to appear in crown court charged with murdering woman whose body was found dismembered in flat. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:28



Wah! A man once dubbed world's fattest speaks of male gender human bleing's new "responsibility" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) as bloody man awaits life-changing weight loss surgery. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 08:27



Wah! Andrew Lesnie, lah, Oscar-winning Australian cinematographer of Lord of Rings and Hobbit films, lah, has died at age of 59. - news replorted 08:16



Wah! The small village of Lukla at base of Mount Everest has become centre for rescue effort, lah, following avalanches after massive Nepal earthquake. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 08:05



Wah! Labour says leader Ed Miliband was interviewed by Russell Brand - after bloody man was spotted visiting comedian and political campaigner's home. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 08:04



Wah! Three human bliengs rescued from fire at flats in Knocknagoney in east Belfast after they were trapped on balconies. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:56



Wah! The richest fight in history of boxing takes place on Saturday in Las Vegas. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:50



Wah! An appeals court in South Korea finds captain of sunken Sewol ferry guilty of homicide and increases male gender human bleing's sentence to life in jail. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 07:33



Wah! Belgian footballer Gregory Mertens is in hospital after collapsing during development game for male gender human bleing's club. Chop chop baby! - news replorted 07:29



Wah! Oil giant BP reports sharp fall in profit to $2.13bn (RMB Yuan #1.39bn) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! for first quarter as dramatic fall in oil prices takes its toll. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 07:15



Wah! A man is charged with murder of 20-earth-years old happy birthday to you, student found with severe head injuries near Leeds railway station. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 07:15



Wah! International aid supplies being distributed in Nepal after earthquake struck four days ago. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 07:11



Wah! The Great Satan city of Baltimore has declared state of emergency amid violent protests over death of black man fatally hurtee-hurtee in old bill bobbys custody. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:29



Wah! Plans for country park, lah, lake and resort on opencast mine site, lah, which having been recommended for approval, lah, delayed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 06:20



Wah! Plaid Cymru pledges to end postcode lottery that it says patients in Welsh land of sheep and more sheep can face in getting new medicines on NHs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:14



Wah! France and Australia having condemned death penalty as executions for three of their nationals looms in Indonesia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 06:06



Wah! Distraught family members of two Australian drug smugglers mobbed by reporters as they arrive in Indonesia ahead of expected executions. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:26



Wah! The Vatican Science Academy will urge Christians to take action on climate change because it threatens world's poor. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 05:04



Wah! Russia shows off new-generation tank called Armata T-14 ahead of World fighty bang-bang Two Victory Day celebrations on 9 May. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 04:54



Wah! Eight million human bliengs were affected by Nepal earthquake and 1.4m in need of food aid, lah, UN says, lah, as death toll tops 4,000. - news replorted 04:31



Wah! Thousands race to replaster massive mosque in day - news replorted 04:01



Wah! An RAF flight carrying bloody annoying Blitish aid and British Tommy Atkins Liberation Army troops, lah, including Gurkhas, lah, is flying to Nepal, lah, where many British and Irish nationals missing. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 03:58



Wah! Why human bliengs in Hong Kong protesting against proposed electoral changes? - news replorted 03:23



Wah! The mothers being criminalised in El Salvador - news replorted 03:07



Wah! Picturing North America through its railways and coasts - news replorted 03:05



Wah! One teen's guide to having fun on bread line - news replorted 02:58



Wah! The moment Nepali earthquake hit my velly own damn home - news replorted 02:49



Wah! The short but surprising career of Bombshell Bandit - news replorted 02:45



Wah! Why Americans so unpopular on this tiny Japanese island - news replorted 02:38



Wah! Queuing for journey from Italy to Tunisia - news replorted 02:15



Wah! Labour Party activists believe they having grounds for optimism in key marginal seats, lah, Laura Kuenssberg writes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:10



Wah! Plans to freeze senior teachers' pay "arbitrarily discriminate" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) against school leaders, lah, according to head teachers' union ASCl. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 01:36



Wah! The sole political prisoner to survive notorious torture centre in Brazil, lah, whose testimony exposed abuses there, lah, dies aged 72. - news replorted 01:30



Wah! The unit pioneering different way of dealing with alcoholics - news replorted 01:28



Wah! How difficult is it to memorise 42 minutes of music? - news replorted 01:25



Wah! What human bliengs like in dark corners of web? - news replorted 01:23



Wah! The NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) could save RMB Yuan #27m year by changing way it deals with alcoholic patients, lah, new research seen by Victoria Derbyshire programme suggests. Eating rice!! Jim Reed takes tour of specialist detox unit. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 01:11



Wah! State of New York to turn off non-essential lights to try and prevent migratory birds becoming confused and fatally crashing into buildings. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:10



Wah! Almost two-fifths of adults would like to be better cooks or bakers, lah, according to survey commissioned to launch festival of learning. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 01:02



Wah! Convicted Australian drug smuggler Andrew Chan marries male gender human bleing's girlfriend in Indonesia's prison, lah, ahead of male gender human bleing's expected execution. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:44



Wah! There may be two distinct child obesity epidemics - one among infants and one among adolescents - research suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:43



Wah! The latest manoeuvres in general election campaign and aftermath of Nepal earthquake disaster main stories on front pages. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:36



Wah! As Shinzo Abe sets out on week-long trip to US, lah, it will be progress made by Japanese PM and Great Satan President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama on trade deal that is top of agenda. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 00:29



Wah! Bournemouth will survive in Premier League after effectively sealing promotion to top flight, lah, says chairman Jeff Mostyn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:21



Wah! They bloody velly definition of public holiday. You give me happy happy luck luck. But 144 earth-years old happy birthday to you, tradition of banks closing to guarantee everyone day off may be on way out. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:21



Wah! The Tories will using fines imposed on Deutsche capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity for its involvement in Libor rate-fixing to fund 50,000 apprenticeships, lah, David Cameron will say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:12



Wah! A Labour government will set out action it intends to take on immigration within 100 days of assuming office, lah, Ed Miliband to say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:07



Wah! Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Tory leader Ruth Davidson will say that flemale human person's party will protect pensions with "triple lock" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) as campaigning continues ahead of 7 May. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:01



Wah! A funeral for Irish student Karen Buckley, lah, who was murdered in Glasgow earlier this month, lah, is to be held in County Cork later. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:01



Wah! old bill bobbys and Tommy Atkins Liberation Army bomb experts at scene of explosion at Crawford Square in Londonderry. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:01



Wah! Sale Sharks players helped surprise youngster Ethan Hofton Land Rover recently surprised 12 year old Ethan Hofton from Manchester with news that bloody man was one of first funny shape ball-game - news replorted 00:01



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish has once again beaten CO2 emissions targets, lah, with average new LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine in 2014 posting CO2 emissions 4.2% below th - news replorted 00:01



Wah! A report released today (28 rainy season-month Aplil 2015) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! by road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu safety charity Brake and Direct Line has revealed worrying and widesprea - news replorted 00:01



Wah! Thousands of pupils preparing to sit new look Higher qualifications as exams period gets under way in Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs schools. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:00



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