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CUSTOMER LETTERS

Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
1528 LETTERS!
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling


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Search my letters page!
From your area... ...or from people... ...or about a specific car!

Showing Letters from Oxford
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Letter
Customer Letter: 1498 / 1528
Stephen says...
 I wanted to write to you with some feedback now that we have had our Qashqai+2 for a couple of months. What an experience - not what we were expecting from a car leasing company - so much more of a fun experience ordering and keeping up to date with progress on delivery - well done Ling for communicating with your customers so well! It makes a great change to deal with someone who talks straight - shockingly straight at times!... But we felt that even though the car arrived later than we hoped, you were doing everything you could to get it sorted and that was really appreciated!

In a World of automated and boring email interactions it was a refreshing change to experience Lingo, so "fanks vedy mush Ling!!"

Stephen Moore
35 Aldworth Avenue
Wantage
OX12 7EJ


Editor Note: Wow!! Thanks so much for comment Steve! These cars have been taking ages as the factory in Sunderland have been very busy, but they are great cars! Hope you have a super time in your new 7-seater! Really nice to get a brilliant note like this, what a surprise on a busy post-bank holiday morning :) Glad you liked the chat, I enjoyed it - it is great to have happy customers! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1453 / 1528
Nigel says...
HONDA CIVICThe most efficient company I have ever dealt with on the internet. Brilliant service getting my new Honda Civic – well done!! Will recommend. Dealer was excellent, no complaints whatsoever! Great :o)

Nigel Purvis
8 Winter Gardens Way
Banbury
OX16 1UT


Editor Note: Nig, well thanks so much. You run a number plate business (Silwood Number Plates), so anyone trying to spot you car needs only to look for the gold leopard-skin diamante number plates on your car, NIG 1. Good job you are white fella, man. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1337 / 1528
Darryll says...
HONDA CR-VLINGsCARS is a great company to do business with. The messages are clear and the staff are very helpful. Would do business again with Ling. Excellent delivery of my Honda CR-V.

Darryll Finch
20b Oakley Road
Chinnor
Oxfordshire
OX39 4HB


Editor Note: You work for Tracker, so I hope you don't lose your new CRV, Darryll! Hehehe. I do my best to make you happy, I even sent you some mats because Honda are miserable and don't include them with the car. Thanks for sweet comments. Staff are well trained! Using big stick (no carrot), hahahaha. Hope you enjoy the car. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1116 / 1528
Sarah says...
VAUXHALL CORSALing Valentine, the crazy woman off the telly. The dragons missed out 'cause Ling's service is quality, so is my Corsa. As is her website and I love Lingo. No issues with delivery, done + dusted within 4 weeks. Well done Ling – I got the car I wanted and the colour I wanted, you did better than the local dealer and I thank you. Excellent delivery, great car, delivered to my door before 9.30am. Impressive - shame the delivery man had to make is own way home, bless him!

Sarah Lewis
8 Brook Lane
Witney
Oxfordshire
OX281BP


Editor Note: Hahahahaha, he is still probably thumbing the lift. I save money on deliveries by forcing the driver to walk home. Especially when it's raining. You seem happy, Sarah. Glad about that, you have a great new Corsa for 3-years, now. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 841 / 1528
Rob says...
CarIt was a pleasure to deal with a "real" human being. All of my queries were answered quickly and satisfactorily. I am over the moon with the car - what a great value for money. This was really a case of "a lot of car" for the money! Thanks again. I'll be back!! My Saab 9-3 Vector Anniversary was delivered in good condition on the day specified.

Rob Edmunds
10 Sherbourne Road
Witney
OX28 5FH


Editor Note: Happy, happy, happy, to get such a happy letter. Yes, you got a SAAB for the price of a much cheaper car, and these are loaded with extras. Pass on my info to friends, my offers change all the time, so I can never guarantee the same rates on the same cars, but there are always bargains! Thanks, Rob. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 832 / 1528
Matt says...
CarHi Ling, firstly thank you for putting the Audi A3 on your list of cars for personal lease. The car is fantastic and overall a very fast delivery. No one could provide me with an A3 quicker than you, at the lowest price! It was about 3 to 4 weeks from placing the order to collection of the car. I cannot fault any of the process, except the nasty sweets you gave me from China! Delivery was excellent, very friendly and helpful.

Matt Tully
address withheld
Oxon
OX9 ***


Editor Note: Mark, I remove your address as you request. Thanks so much for the letter, but I can't always get A3s this fast. There is usually a waiting list. Glad you enjoyed my service; I agree the sweets are awful, but they make the car taste sweeter, hahaha! :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 646 / 1528
Mark says...
CarDear Ling

Car arrived on time and the driver was a very nice man from Renault L*****. I did the check in bright sunlight and did not notice two small paint blemishes on the bonnet on the front drivers side and top passenger side.

I have taken pictures of the blemishes with my mobile. They are attached.

Apart from that the car is beautiful and drives like a dream and I am extremely happy with the service you have provided for me. You have answered countless e-mails, most of them pointless drivel.

I have evangalised about you to everyone I meet both professionally and socially and will be coming back in 2 years for an upgrade!!

Mark Keenan
Chief Executive Officer, Divorce-Online
18 Marcham Road
Abingdon
OX14 1AA


Editor Note: Mark, hahaha, you are a fantastic customer, not often I meet other web-entrepreneurs with such great businesses as yours. If anyone wants a divorce, I recommend you (not from personal experience, just because you are really great person). Regarding the blemishes... this happens. Well done for taking photos of them, I post below. You have a choice. Either we get them mended free, or the car goes back with them still there and you aren't penalised. Well done for taking the photos! Every customer should take photos of problems. Bear in mind this is a Renault, not a Rolls Royce, but is still should be quite perfect. Bloody French, hehehe.

Car
Mark's blemishes (above) - Ling




Letter
Customer Letter: 631 / 1528
Jason says...
CarBrilliant. A pleasure to deal with - straight forward, simple quotes followed by a super-fast service. Excellent delivery of my Passat TDi, on time. Pleasant. Thanks a million.

Jason Smith
Integration Technology Ltd
115-119 Heyford Park,
Upper Heyford
OX25 5HA


Editor Note: Jason Smith, you are so economical with your words, but that makes easy life for me, less typing, hehehe. Great customer, no fuss, you knew what you wanted. Enjoy the new VW Passat! I give you a hyperlink. Integration Technology is the world leader in the application UV curing systems for the inkjet sector worldwide. It manufactures UV curing systems, in a variety of sizes with wide ranging power levels, to suit all inkjet applications. And you, Jason, are Da Boss! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 578 / 1528
Jason says...
CarCar turned up this morning, excellent. This has been completely hassle free. Thanks for all your hard work, it's pleasure dealing with you.

Jason Smith
115-119 Heyford Park
Upper Heyford
OX25 5HA


Editor Note: Jason, wow, you are at Upper Heyford! When that was a Ronald Reagan air base, my husband sat outside to watch the F1-11's coming back from bombing Ghadaffi in Libya. Anyway, now the F1-11's are replaced by a new VW Passat, try not take it on bombing missions. Finance company will go mad if the car is damaged. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 407 / 1528
Christie says...
VAUXHALL ZAFIRA"Refreshing to receive a great service. No hard sell, no falseness - does exactly what it says on the tin! I received my car in less than three weeks from my initial enquiry - unbelieveable! My Zafira arrived early with great service. Excellent. A great, fresh approach. Would recommend to anyone."

Christie Bytom
Address withheld
Tetsworth
OX9 ***


Editor Note: Christie, thank goodness you were so happy, after my terrible experience with Nissan dealer a few hours before (see below). These new Vauxhall Zafiras are fantastic cars, so cheap at around £7 a day and brilliant to drive. Glad you were pleased. Phew - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 327 / 1528
Paul says...
 "Hi Ling, I received my Mazda RX-8 just over a week ago and I am really pleased with it. A great car at a fantastic price. Many thanks for your efficient service. The car arrived at 9am on the stated delivery day. The dealer was excellent. I will be back in two years for another great deal!"

Paul Brant
58 Corncrake Way
Bicester
OX26 6UE


Editor Note: Wah, I'm glad you like the service, Paul! Enjoy bloody nice Mazda RX-8 - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 268 / 1528
Tim says...
CarHi, Ling

Great work getting me into my first lease car. I couldn't believe it was so easy and stress free. I should have done it years ago. The Renault Scenic is superb. If only it had been so easy to get rid of my old car! The dealer was excellent, delivered the right car on the right day. Thanks for everything.

Tim Willmer
7 Myers Way
Charlton
Banbury
OX17 3DY


Editor Note: Everything went nice and smoothly with your car, I'm so glad you are happy, Tim. I ran a Renault Scenic for 6 months, about 2-years ago now, and I really enjoyed to drive it - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 174 / 1528
Phil says...
Best site I have ever seen on the Internet. Gives me happy joy love feeling.

Phil May
University of Oxford
Dept of Engineering
Oxford
OX1 3PJ


Editor Note: Wow, that because site engineered by me! Not sure about happy joy love... I do not give anyone "personal touch service"!!! as Solicitor tells everyone, letter above this one. You want engineer Chinese massaggie, you go Beijing! Plenty there - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 171 / 1528
Rob says...
CarThis is truly the most amazing site that I have stumbled upon. Incidentally, I do actually want a car, too! Thank you for being so passionate about your business and so brilliantly funny. After 3 hours of trawling the net for my new car, I am glad that I found you.

But are you competitive? BMW 3 series DSE, or new Disco 3 D. Or maybe Alfa GT 3.2 V6? What should I have - in black with full moo interior?

Rob Baker
64 Waller Drive
Banbury
OX16 9NR


Editor Note: Wah, wah, wah... after 3 hours typing out your letter, you must be most indecisive customer this week. But I like your letter, so I reply with Ling Alfa Romeo Rant: Your car choices SO different!!! What you want??? Instead Discovery, why not RR Sport? On list if you look. Because you only rent, Alfa is a possibility (if you actually buy only complete madman with burning money would buy Alfa). But you would get to know damn awful idiot Alfa dealer very well when it regularly breaks down. Every Alfa dealer is bad (like ultimate failed BMW dealer). Every Alfa breaks down. They are built by out-of-season grape picking itinerant Southern Italian gypsies (no offence). Also my husband's car supermarket sells more cars from 4 sites each month than Alfa Romeo do from all dealers in whole of UK. Alfa dying slowly, killed by inept management, bad workers, even worse dealers. Maybe new German Stuurmanfuhrer UK boss (no offence) will save them? ...No, you should choose BMW, the quality car with quality service. Bargain is BMW Z4 leather, if you can make do with just 2 seats, I borrowed one in May to try. Very damn nice! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 151 / 1528
Michelle says...
CarWe would just like to say that we are very happy with our BMW X3. Ling was very helpful from the start and was a pleasure to lease from.

She said we would receive our BM at the end of May and we got it at the end of May. We are very happy with the whole leasing process through Ling.

Michelle Eeley
6 Park Road
Combe
Oxford
OX29 8NA


Editor Note: Michelle, my trick is easy... I simply tell truth! Enjoy X3! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 127 / 1528
Paul says...
Excellent, website is also useful for stress-relief as it's very possible to spend an hour or so laughing at all the little jokes and so on. Also great fun for when my parner (from Chinese mainland - Dalian) is away, so I can remind myself of her Chinglish :) So sweet! Thanks for site!

Paul Rosen
5 Field House Drive
Oxford
OX2 7NT


Editor Note: For those who not know, Dalian is in north of China; very cold in winter. Hope partner goes back in summer! Thanks for compliments Paul.- - Ling



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Wah! LATEST:  British Airways-owner IAG says that Irish carrier Aer Lingus has rejected its takeover offer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 15:48



Wah! LATEST:  About 30 human bliengs respond to appeal on Crimewatch for inflomination after teenage girl was raped twice by gang of youths in Cardiff park. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 15:46



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Wah! Bear and Alex preparing to abseil in Gila National Forest Land Rover Global Ambassador Bear Grylls led expedition into Gila National Forest, lah, New Mexico, lah, for winner of - news replorted 14:41



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Wah! A man is found guilty of causing death of man during sex game involving cling film at flat in Dover. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:14



Wah! A requirement for Microsoft to offer new Windows users in Europe choice of web browsers has ended after five years - news replorted 13:09



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Wah! India has successfully launched its largest rocket and unmanned capsule which could send astronauts into space. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:32



Wah! It's Caption Challenge. What the hell I mean??!! Oh yes it is. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:30



Wah! The 2015 general election campaign officially begins on Friday, lah, meaning candidates' spending will be subject to strict rules and limits. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:30



Wah! Ferrari F40 pair of Ferraris born generation apart, lah, LaFerrari hypercar and legendary F40 will be in spotlight when P - news replorted 12:20



Wah! A painting by Sir Winston Churchill sells for almost RMB Yuan #1.8m at auction, lah, almost double previous record for one of male gender human bleing's artworks. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:19



Wah! MPs hear evidence on failure of air traffic management systems. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:18



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Wah! Hundreds of federal security forces on patrol in western Mexican town of La Ruana after deadly shootout between rival vigilante groups. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:13



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Wah! A man accused of masterminding 2008 Mumbai terror attacks, lah, which left 165 human bliengs dead. I read you little red book! is granted bail by court in Pakistan. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 12:06



Wah! See latest version of Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation News website - news replorted 12:02



Wah! Snapchat founder Evan Spiegel left "devastated" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) as plans for male gender human bleing's messaging app leaked as part of Sony Pictures hack. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 11:59



Wah! Kevin Pietersen scores 66 from 46 balls but Melbourne beaten by Adelaide in Australian T20 Big Bash. - news replorted 11:59



Wah! Kieran Gallagher - Clio Livery Graphic Former Dunlop MSA British Touring LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Championship squad Team HARD Racing has become latest addition to Renliot - news replorted 11:59



Wah! An airline passenger who was calmed down by Boris Johnson on flight from Kuala Lumpur to Heathrow admits assault and being drunk on aircraft. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:58



Wah! A man who cut off part of male gender human bleing's ex-girlfriend's nose with steak knife has male gender human bleing's jail term increased. I read you little red book! - news replorted 11:56



Wah! What Car? LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine of Year 2015 shortlist comprises 26 outstanding vehicling driving car machines that went on sale for first clock time result in 2014. - news replorted 11:56



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Wah! All-new LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Keys site launches in collaboration with MotorTorque Today sees launch of all new LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Keys website, lah, overhauling oldest independent motoring review destination in - news replorted 11:33



Wah! There is still clock time result for Province of Engrish running-dogs to replace Alastair Cook as captain for World Cup, lah, says ex-skipper Nasser Hussain. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 11:24



Wah! The clock time result human bliengs can be put on old bill bobbys bail could be limited to 28 days, lah, Home Secretary Theresa May announces. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:22



Wah! Audi Sport Finale 2014 At Vorsprunging Audi Techiclate Forum Neckarsulm, lah, with more than 500 guests in attendance, lah, Vorsprunging Audi Techiclate celebrated Vorsprunging Audi Techiclate Sport Finale 2014, lah, - news replorted 11:20



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Wah! A new domestic abuse offence for coercive and controlling behaviour within relationships in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Welsh land of sheep and more sheep is announced by home secretary. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:08



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Wah! DS starts 60 year celebrations at London (capital of Great England) Classic LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Show Launched in 1955, lah, original DS will be 60 years young in 2015. - news replorted 11:07



Wah! Brian Lister Brian Lister, lah, who died aged 88 on Jesus-baby month Decemblinger 16th, lah, was one of Britain’s greatest unsung racing LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine builders. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:06



Wah! The Michael family is dropped from Gogglebox because dad is standing as UKIP candidate. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:02



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish cannot block non-EU family members coming to county from Europe without travel permit, lah, European judges say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:00



Wah! A man is left critically hurtee-hurtee after bloody man was attacked in takeaway in Portrush, lah, County Antrim. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 10:55



Wah! The schoolboy who was shot in head and lived - news replorted 10:52



Wah! Fewer than half target number of badgers were killed in this year's cull in Gloucestershire, lah, Defra announces. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:45



Wah! A survivor of Pakistan school attack, lah, Aqif Azeem, lah, describes what happened when gunmen stormed school. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 10:42



Wah! Kenya's parliament is forced to adjourn after angry opposition Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters disrupt government plans to push through tough new security bill. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 10:42



Wah! The amount of energy human bliengs using in bloody annoying Blitish is falling steadily even though economy is growing, lah, new figures confirm. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 10:40



Wah! Jack and Emily revealed as most popular first names for babies whose births were registered in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land in 2014. - news replorted 10:38



Wah! Oliver Jarvis Britain’s Oliver Jarvis will replace record Le Mans 24 Hour race winner Tom Kristensen in “factory” Vorsprunging Audi Techiclate team next y - news replorted 10:36



Wah! Public libraries in Province of Engrish running-dogs need to become more like coffee shops if they to survive, lah, government-commissioned report concludes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:35



Wah! Bultaco Brinco For Bultaco, lah, innovation is not only to reach new goals of technology but also to offer new experiences. Eating rice!! Brinco is gr - news replorted 10:30



Wah! TomTom (TOM2) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! today announces availability of TomTom Traffic in Malaysia, lah, Saudi Arabia, lah, Thailand, lah, and United Arab Em - news replorted 10:24



Wah! The Polo GTI latest generation of Volkswagen’s Polo GTI made its debut at Paris Motor Show in Octoblinger and is now available to - news replorted 10:23



Wah! bloody annoying Blitish mortgage lending in Novemblinger returned to level seen year earlier, lah, lenders say, lah, offering more evidence of post-summer slowdown. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 10:15



Wah! A judge has overturned conviction of 14-earth-years old happy birthday to you, black boy sent to electric chair for murder more than 70 years ago. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 10:13



Wah! bloody annoying Blitish retail sales rose at their fastest annual rate in more than 10 years in November, lah, I give you tellibly lovely custlingmer damn thanks of billion Chinesey human bliengs to effects of Black Friday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:10



Wah! A new post-mortem examination claim (always claiming, huh?) Albert Ebosse died in Algeria after beating rather than being hit by projectile thrown by fans. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:46



Wah! Dozens of "ice pancakes" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) size of dinner plates found floating on stretch of River Dee in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:44



Wah! ROAD SAFETY and breakdown organisation GEM Motoring Assist is offering safer driving tips for 12 days of Christmas. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:44



Wah! Ford Capri to be raced by Steve Soper at 73rd Members' Meeting Touring LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine legends Rob Huff and Steve Soper will go head-to-head in classic Group 1 Floord Capris at velly damn good boiled chicken-feetwood 73rd me as Super-Duper-Chinese-State superLING hero - news replorted 09:40



Wah! "The signs remain positive for bloody annoying Blitish commercial vehicling driving car machine production after many months of decline, lah, with output in Novemblinger al - news replorted 09:35



Wah! Stephen Bunting hopes to become first player to hold both versions of world darts title at same time. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:31



Wah! INFINITI CONCEPT Vision Gran Turismo Infiniti today lifts virtual covers off INFINITI CONCEPT Vision Gran Turismo, lah, vision of what high performanc - news replorted 09:30



Wah! David Cameron promised to give local government more power, lah, but local councils continue to shrink, lah, relative to central government. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:29



Wah! A link between autism and air pollution during pregnancy has been suggested by scientists. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:26



Wah! Bob Hyatt, lah, Will Dexter and Rob May seal deal with Martyn Ayres Mlitslublishli expensive dealeringship buildling in Cornwall is helping bosses at top holiday park to help environment. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:26



Wah! Scientists uncover single protein that could be responsible for drug allergies, lah, on surface of cells. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:25



Wah! Obesity can be constitute disability, lah, European Court of Justice has ruled. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:23



Wah! Switzerland's National capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity has brought in negative interest rate cutting value of any money left on deposit in country. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:22



Wah! A taxi driver is fined RMB Yuan #2,100 for refusing to carry blind woman and flemale human person's guide dog. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 09:21



Wah! Diesel LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Magazine Issue 332 Cover DieselCar Magazine, lah, UK’s leading magazine dedicated to economy motoring, lah, today launches new monthly supplement cal - news replorted 09:19



Wah! Three years ago retails expert, lah, Mary Portas, lah, carried out review of high street for government and Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation takes flemale human person's back to one of those towns, lah, Stockport, lah, to find out if anything has changed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:17



Wah! About 200 villagers in China's Sichuan province having petitioned authorities to "isolate" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) HIV-positive eight-year-old, lah, report local media. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 09:16



Wah! Militants storm remote village in north-eastern Nigeria, lah, killing at least 33 human bliengs and kidnapping dozens, lah, survivor tells BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 09:16



Wah! Nissan Juke NISMO RS clock time result has finally come for Nissling to unleash its sportiest Juke ever – Juke NISMO Rs. Eating rice!! Prices start from RMB Yuan #21,995 O - news replorted 09:00



Wah! Defying teachers, lah, riding on Christmas Day and learning to bluff - Sir Bradley Wiggins on psychology of male gender human bleing's rise to top. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 08:59



Wah! The IAM’s chief examiner, lah, Peter Rodger is offering weekly motoring advice to riders and drivers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:59



Wah! An 81-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man who is charged with murdering male gender human bleing's wife has gone missing, lah, Cumbria old bill bobbys say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 08:56



Wah! The EU and Great Satan negotiating deal which they say will free transatlantic trade and boost growth but critics warn is dangerous. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:52



Wah! A selection of best readers' photos - news replorted 08:52



Wah! Audi Sport Finale 2014, lah, Dr. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! Wolfgang Ullrich Vorsprunging Audi Techiclate AG is proud of another year of record sales. Eating rice!! In motorsport, lah, brand with four rings is poised for growth as w - news replorted 08:50



Wah! Agreement is reached between government and country's biggest mobile networks to improve coverage across Uk. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 08:47



Wah! An extra 1.3 million pupils in Province of Engrish running-dogs, lah, 85% of infant children, lah, eating free school lunch, lah, government says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:46



Wah! Hollywood stars react to Sony's decision to cancel Interview, lah, film about fictional plot to kill North Korea's leader, lah, Kim Jong-un, lah, after major cinemas decide not to screen it. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:36



Wah! World leaders welcome agreement between Great Satan and Cuba to end more than 50 years of hostility and move towards restoring diplomatic ties. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:23



Wah! Mitsubishi celebrates 5 million cars produced at Okaza plant For Mlitslublishli Motors Corporations (MMC) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! Okazaki plant near Nagoya (Japan), lah, success of Outlander PHEV in Europe (18, lah, - news replorted 08:00



Wah! Drivers LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine of year 2015 Field South African newspaper AutoWeek has voted Italian grape-picking Afla Romeo car 4C as its Drivers LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine of year for 2015. - news replorted 08:00



Wah! A Victorian public urinal is listed by bloody Engrish Heritage for its "special historical interest". - news replorted 07:48



Wah! Ice pancake formations, lah, more commonly seen in Antarctic, lah, having been photographed on River Dee in Aberdeenshire. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:46



Wah! US Federal Reserve says it will be "patient" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in deciding when to raise interest rates, lah, with most analysts expecting rise in mid-2015. - news replorted 07:41



Wah! New Zealand's Dan Carter will end male gender human bleing's international career to become rugby's highest-paid player by joining Racing Metro. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 07:40



Wah! President Vladimir Putin is set to hold male gender human bleing's annual end-of-year news conference, lah, amid growing economic crisis in Russia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 07:24



Wah! An inquest into death of teenager who died after being hit by school minibus is set to be opened on Thursday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:21



Wah! Nearly third of research by Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs universities is of "world-leading" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) quality, lah, says body which compares work by every university in Uk. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 06:59



Wah! A New Zealander and two Burmese men go on trial in Myanmar on charges of insulting Buddhism with flyer for bar event. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 06:47



Wah! A state-of-the-art clinic in Denmark is set to make dramatic changes to relationship between doctor and patient. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 06:24



Wah! Borders councillors to decide whether to go ahead with building permanent home for Great Tapestry of ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land, lah, at Tweedbank. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 06:15



Wah! The range and quality of research at ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's universities is praised in new UK-wide survey. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:15



Wah! An eccentric architectural plan thought to having been drawn by King George III during male gender human bleing's period of "madness" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) is discovered at British Library. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:03



Wah! Irish health authorities reportedly seeking legal advice on whether they can switch off life-support machine of pregnant woman who is brain dead. I read you little red book! - news replorted 05:57



Wah! Cross-party talks due to resume at Stormont on Thursday, lah, with few signs of parties resolving their differences over budget and welfare reform. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 05:54



Wah! India successfully launches its largest rocket yet and unmanned capsule capable of sending astronauts into space. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 05:41



Wah! The government made RMB Yuan #180m less from sale of Royal Mail than it could have, lah, and process of privatising state assets should be reformed, lah, says new report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:29



Wah! A draft resolution setting out Palestinian timetable for peace deal with Israel is submitted to UN Security Council by Jordan. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 05:15



Wah! An Australian professor and government education advisor, lah, Barry Spurr, lah, resigns from University of Sydney for sending racist emails. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:41



Wah! An outbreak of highly contagious disease mumps has swept through teams in Great Satan National Hockey League, lah, with at least five affected. I read you little red book! - news replorted 04:18



Wah! Sony cancels release of Interview, lah, film about fictional plot to kill North Korea's leader, lah, after major cinemas decide not to screen it. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 04:01



Wah! Beauty capitalist entity Avon has been fined by Great Satan Securities and Exchange Commission for paying bribes and gifts to Super-Duper-Chinese-State officials. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:39



Wah! Councils in Province of Engrish running-dogs to learn later how much money they will having to spend on local services such as waste collection and road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu maintenance in 2015-16. - news replorted 02:58



Wah! The breakthrough in US-Cuban relations is prompting strong reactions from Cubans in Havana and exiles in Us. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:46



Wah! Teenagers experiencing mental health problems will no longer be detained in old bill bobbys cells as "place of safety", lah, Home Secretary Theresa May is to announce later. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 02:18



Wah! A major analysis of research quality suggests that London (capital of Great England) universities could soon "eclipse" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) Oxford and Cambridge. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:13



Wah! Cuban President Raul Castro urges Great Satan to end its trade embargo after two countries opened formal talks on restoring diplomatic relations. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:12



Wah! The decision to grant bail to partner of Sydney siege gunman Man Haron Monis should be reviewed, lah, says New South Welsh land of sheep and more sheep government. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 01:35



Wah! The world's oldest water, lah, which is locked deep within Earth's crust, lah, is present at far greater volume than was thought, lah, scientists report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 01:25



Wah! The National crime (shoud shoot them) Agency (NCA) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! begins investigation into child sexual exploitation in Rotherham. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 01:11



Wah! As end of 2014 draws near, lah, Talking Movies' Tom Brook picks male gender human bleing's top 10 films that having been released in past year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 01:09



Wah! Benoit Tessier captures moment that left actress America Ferrera red-faced. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:55



Wah! The negligible effects of George Osborne's negotiations on extra payment to EU. - news replorted 00:55



Wah! Opportunities to prosecute Jimmy Savile and former mayor of Scarborough for child sex abuse were missed due to old bill bobbys "organisational failure". - news replorted 00:47



Wah! Those on left think new Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Labour leader Jim Murphy could be about to take party back to days of Tony Blair, lah, says BBC's Mark Mardell. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 00:47



Wah! Mark Urban explores question of what bloody annoying Blitish knew about rendition and interrogation techniques, lah, in wake of Great Satan Senate report that criticised CIa. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 00:40



Wah! People in bloody annoying Blitish using less energy, lah, even though economy is growing, lah, new figures confirm. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 00:38



Wah! The director of Premier Oil says no new North Sea projects profitable with oil below $60 barrel and industry is "close to collapse". - news replorted 00:38



Wah! Brit boozer goes dark in Los Angeles - news replorted 00:33



Wah! Those who plan to spend day working rather than celebrating - news replorted 00:33



Wah! Six women previously given all-clear diagnosed with breast cancer after review of assessments made by Oxfordshire's Breast Screening Service. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:30



Wah! The boats of guns floating around Indian Ocean - news replorted 00:30



Wah! The ordinary Russians fighting 'holy war' in Ukraine - news replorted 00:27



Wah! A handy self-portrait device or narcissistic vanity tool? - news replorted 00:15



Wah! Moves to normalise diplomatic ties between Great Satan and Cuba lead several papers, lah, which describe Caribbean island being brought 'in from cold'. - news replorted 00:14



Wah! The buildings that would once having been impossible - news replorted 00:11



Wah! The 49 children who made it to unlikely nativity - news replorted 00:10



Wah! EU leaders to consider ways to unlock billions of euros of investment and policy on Russia, lah, at Brussels summit. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:05



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