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CUSTOMER LETTERS

Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
1528 LETTERS!
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling


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Search my letters page!
From your area... ...or from people... ...or about a specific car!

Showing Letters from Carlisle
Show ALL My Letters

Letter
Customer Letter: 1425 / 1528
Sarah says...
PEUGEOT 308Found LINGsCARS after recommendation from family and expected the service to be compromised because the price of my new Peugeot 308 was so much lower than anywhere else I had looked. This wasn't the case and I couldn't have been treated any better - despite the remote location of my house. I would and have recommended Ling to everyone I know.

Sarah Jarrett
6 Portland Steet
Workington
Cumbria
CA14 4BQ


Editor Note: Hahahaha, price of the car has nothing to do with service, Sarah. I treat all customers the same, from Matiz to BMW M3. No difference to me. I generate the lowest prices possible, and demand top service from suppliers. Lovely letter from wild and windy (and wet) Cumbria, thanks so much! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1327 / 1528
Susan says...
FORD FIESTAI'm thrilled with my new Ford Fiesta! Ling made the process idiot proof, was professional and even when there was a glitch to resolve after the delivery inspection, this was done with a sense of urgency and no-nonsense. Thanks Ling, we're recommending you to all our friends and family. Delivery was poor, but the dealer's effort to resolve things was excellent!

Susan Sehzade-Cosway
20 Dalesman Drive
Carlisle
CA1 3TH


Editor Note: OK, for the benefit of people reading this I will detail: On delivery, Sue noticed the airbag warning light had come on. There were also some other things - there were a couple of stone chips and the car was dirty (a wet day). The dealer immediately, personally went to sort this stuff out. Sue then sent me a message: "Really appreciate your swift response and push to resolve the prob with the car. 'Neil' just called and has assured me that surplus mileage will be reimbursed by cheque, and he is coming personally to collect my car leaving me with his until mine is back with me. He was extremely apologetic and very reluctant to send the car to our local Ford dealership given their shoddy response to me earlier today. The car is booked into his service dept first thing tomorrow and he has let them know he wants a 'diagnosis' by 10am."

(Then Sue sent another message)...

"Neil called me about an hour ago to confirm that it was a tiny problem of a connector not having been connected properly (under the seat for the airbag) by the manufacturer. Such a relief and finding my excitement rising again at getting my new and perfect car :o). I can't thank you enough for your superb customer service and personal attention in this matter. As I stated previously, the glitch with the warning light was a Ford problem and we cannot fault your handling of this matter. You have been superb! We also feel that Neil went the whole extra mile too in his handling of this issue and will be conveying this to his manager (s) if you would be so kind to supply us with their name(s) and contact address. Needless to say we will recommend you to as many people as will listen!"

(Then a bit later)...

"Just to confirm, the car was delivered by Neil about an hour and a half ago. Everything is in order and very pleased with it."

All in all excellent dealer response, I agree! Glad you love the car, Sue, and thanks so much for all comments. Other customers will appreciate to read this. Well done to Neil at the dealer! - Ling




Letter
Customer Letter: 1311 / 1528
Digger says...
FORD FIESTAGood, quick service. Website easy to use. Will recommend to other people. Good delivery of my new Ford Fiesta.

Digger Gray
Grays Jewellers
37 King Street
Penrith, Cumbria
CA11 7AY


Editor Note: Digger, your are a Jeweller, so you appreciate the styling of these new Fiestas, eveyone in the car trade thinks they are diamond cars, because they sell well and have brilliant residual values. Pretty perfect small cars! Thanks so much for the comments, you were a super customer. In the first week, you put 900 miles on your car, you need to slow down a bit! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 919 / 1528
Brian says...
CarCarFirst class service - excellent, fully informed at all times, including the delays from the dealers. I will be back for more in the future. Good delivery.

Brian Christelow
Total Postweigh Ltd
1 Skelgillside
Alston
CA9 3TR


Editor Note: Brian, well, you couldn't have the colour of Captiva you wanted, simply because there weren't any available. These Captivas are so popular! Total Postweigh have had loads of cars from me, plus the company is a Queen's Award winner! Great. Sorry about the dealer's delays, but that happens however you acquire a car I guess. Also, the VW Passat was delivered smoothly :) See you soon. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 640 / 1528
David says...
CarMegane CC turned up safely and when promised! It looks fab - many thanks for the excellent service - keep up the hard work.

David Hymers
Total Postweigh International Ltd
1 Skelgillside
Alston
CA9 3TR


Editor Note: Wow, David. You are a VERY good customer. As well as this Megane CC, you have taken a Vauxhall Vectra, an Audi A4 Avant, a Jaguar X-Type, a Land Rover Freelander, two Renault Meganes, another Megane CC and a Ford Focus! Your company has won so many awards, including from the Queen! It is a pleasure to deal with you. I must do something right :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 580 / 1528
Brian says...
CarThis must be the best way to get a car, just pick your price and your car off Ling's website and let Ling do the rest! Even me, a stupid farmer, can manage that! Delivery was excellent.

The best thing was that when I needed to speak to someone, I spoke to Ling herself and not some answering machine. Yes, she is crackers.

Brian Atkinson
Scratchmere Scar farm
Plumpton
Penrith
CA11 9PF


Editor Note: Brian, hehehe so, I am crackers and you are stupid - what a team, eh? Not so stupid, though... you got the cheapest 4x4 for your farm and in the colour you wanted and on the date you wanted. That's all that matters eh? Nice to deal with someone who will be using the 4x4 properly (for sheep and cows and stuff) and not some WAG, hehehe. These Kia Sorentos are proper, good, full-size 4x4 SUVs. Plus, EU subsidies are paying the rentals - you can't lose :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 568 / 1528
Denise says...
CarExcellent! I would recommend you, definitely. Great fast service and regularly kept up to date.

Denise Earl
The Hollies
Main Street
Brampton
CA8 1SH


Editor Note: Thanks for the letter, Denise. Zafira is excellent car, especially for family tours of the Lake District. Have fun driving it around, with your family. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 441 / 1528
Bill says...
FIAT GRANDE PUNTO"This must be the first business website that keeps you entertained. I came across it on a Google search. Ling was very helpful and made the first-time process of leasing a car a doddle - no problems - and I will recommend and use Ling again. Excellent delivery. Keep up the good work."

Bill Armstrong
48 Whinnie House Rd
Carlisle
CA2 6TG


Editor Note: Hey Bill, your car was turned around quickly. You chose Grand Punto which unfortunately had manufacturer recall for some parts missing under dash, but you got these fixed by the local dealer free of charge. Glad you were happy. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 393 / 1528
Steve says...
SKODA FABIA"Hi Ling

Just a note to add to your collection from satisfied customers.

We have just taken delivery of our new (cheap!! - Ling) Skoda Fabia - it's fantastic, no hitches or problems, thanks. It is refreshing to deal with someone who is on the customer's side for once in the car industry. I know you have really earned your money on this deal - what with all our enquiries - but it really is appreciated and we WILL be back."

Steve Hill
Dufton Hall
Dufton
Appleby
CA16 6DD


Editor Note: Yes, Stephen, you changed your mind about fourteen times, but I FORGIVE YOU. You were actually a very pleasant customer and you have previous experience of dealing inside the motor trade. There are some terrible practices going on, I do my best not to be bullied or beaten up by them. With support of customers like you, I know I will win. At the moment I am having dirty tricks played on me by a BIG player in this industry. One day I will give them bloody nose, revenge best cold, eh? Hope you and Susan enjoy damn cheap Skoda Fabia - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 367 / 1528
Carolyn says...
car"Hi Ling,

I would like to thank you for the fantastic service we have received from your company so far. All our cars have turned up when promised. Keep up the good work. Fabulous service."

Carolyn Hymers
Total Postweigh International Ltd
1 Skelgillside
Alston
CA9 3TR


Editor Note: Do you mind if I publish the cars you have had, Carolyn??? This letter refers to a Land Rover Freelander, but you have also had a Jaguar X-Type, and Audi A4 plus you have two more Renault Meganes on order. Never mind my "fabulous service", you are a fabulous customer! You were also finalist in Cumbria "Exporter of the Year" business awards. Well done! I give you hyperlink, a rare privilege - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 340 / 1528
David says...
Car "Ling is unique - I've been selling for 30+ years, but her marketing and sales approach rates as amongst the best I've ever seen. This is (as importantly) backed up by fast, accurate and helpful responses to pricing, queries and completion arrangements.

Fast, competitive, helpful - why go elsewhere? I had no complaints and excellent service from both of Ling's supplying dealers. That's right, I had two new cars from Ling, a Jaguar X-Type and an Audi A4!"

David Hymers
1 Skelgillside
Alston
CA9 3TR


Editor Note: David, thank you for compliment. This is one of the best letters I have ever received. I simply try to treat everyone as adults, not idiots. This is my trick - Ling



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Wah! LATEST:  Two bodies found after blaze at fireworks warehouse in Stafford, lah, old bill bobbys say - news replorted 16:45



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Wah! A man cut male gender human bleing's partner's throat to save flemale human person's from "fate worse than death" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) because bloody man thought demons were about to break into their home in Ceredigion, lah, court heard. I read you little red book! - news replorted 16:31



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Wah! Labour's Alan Billings wins by-election for old bill bobbys and crime (shoud shoot them) Commissioner for South Yorkshire, lah, following resignation of Shaun Wright. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 15:03



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Wah! An 82-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man is jailed for life for murdering male gender human bleing's partner and flemale human person's daughter who bloody man shot at close range at male gender human bleing's puppy farm in Surrey. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 14:34



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Wah! All new government policies in Province of Engrish running-dogs now having to undergo test to check whether they help families. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:59



Wah! A woman who was caught on CCTV dragging man in wheelchair behind flemale human person's LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine is handed two-year driving ban. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:42



Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs head coach Stuart Lancaster says Sam Burgess's "mental toughness" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) can lead him to success in funny shape ball-game union. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:40



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Wah! UN chief Ban Ki-moon says discrimination against humanitarian workers who return home from Ebola crisis in West Africa is "unacceptable". - news replorted 13:31



Wah! Chelsea boss Jose Mourinho confirms striker Diego Costa will be available for Saturday's Premier League game with QPr. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:30



Wah! This year's Halloween is warmest on record in UK, lah, with temperatures reaching as high as 23.5C, lah, breaking previous record of 20c. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 13:28



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Wah! Lee Westwood posts hole-in-one in second round 65 to move into third, lah, three shots behind Billy Hurley III, lah, in Kuala Lumpur. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:16



Wah! People may not like paying tax. But what is even less popular is thought they having no choice while others having much more control over their tax bill, lah, says BBC's Sebastian Chrispin. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:09



Wah! Mazda Motor Corporation remains on course for another record year after reporting exceptional first half. Firecracker break! BANG BANG! - news replorted 13:00



Wah! Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger admits bloody man is concerned by male gender human bleing's players' using of social media site Twitter, lah, plus more. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:52



Wah! The DUP says it intends to bring controversial welfare reform issue 'to head" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) before Christmas if it is not resolved in current talks process. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:29



Wah! The funeral is held for actor who was face of Father Christmas in famous Coca-Cola advertising campaign. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 12:28



Wah! Citroën awarded GreenFleet City LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Manufacturer of Year Citroën has been honoured with two key GreenFleet awards, lah, which recognise both company’s expanding range of efficien - news replorted 12:28



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Wah! A team has developed micro-sized rockets, lah, powered by seawater, lah, that can neutralise chemical and biological weapons. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:22



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Wah! A musical version of hit 2002 British comedy film Bend It Like Beckham is to open in West End next year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 12:07



Wah! P01 Festive Fill-Up By Richard Wheatland BEN, lah, automotive industry charity, lah, takes great pride in offering wide selection of automotive themed Christmas gree - news replorted 12:07



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Wah! Delays in getting ambulance to alleged murder victim (trying not to cry) (trying not to cry) in Wrexham being investigated by Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs Ambulance Service. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:02



Wah! A long-term vision is set out for Prestwick Airport - year after it was taken into public ownership amid fears it could close. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:00



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Wah! Russia's central capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity raises interest rates to 9.5% from 8%, lah, much bigger rise than expected, lah, as it seeks to combat inflation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 11:32



Wah! Tracker urges LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine owners not to compromise on security protection Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Watchdog (30th Octoblinger 2014) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has yet again put spotlight on shocking risk of keyless LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine theft, lah, as technolog - news replorted 11:32



Wah! Software firm Drupal warns millions to "assume" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) they having been hacked if they having not applied patch for recently discovered bug. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 11:30



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Wah! Government dodgy ministers seek advice as "a matter of urgency" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) from auditors who blocked RMB Yuan #330,000 pay-off for Wales' highest paid council chief. Firecracker break! BANG BANG! - news replorted 11:18



Wah! As 2014 World Superbike and World Supersport championships head to their respective conclusions this weekend at - news replorted 11:18



Wah! Three men who challenged their special extended sentences for preparing terrorism offences lose their appeals. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:17



Wah! A man who killed teenage girl by hanging flemale human person's at male gender human bleing's parents' house loses male gender human bleing's appeal against male gender human bleing's whole-life sentence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:13



Wah! A mayor in south of France bans clown disguises for month, lah, starting on Halloween, lah, after several violent incidents involving teenagers dressed as clowns. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:08



Wah! Counting begins in election of new old bill bobbys and crime (shoud shoot them) Commissioner for South Yorkshire, lah, following resignation of Shaun Wright. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:04



Wah! The 2014 Klia Sportage - now available on Klia Rental Launching at 12 dealerships across UK, lah, Klia Motors bloody annoying Blitish Ltd., lah, is now able to offer flexible rental solution to both r - news replorted 10:54



Wah! A Great Satan judge rules long-running arglingument between Marvin Gaye's family, lah, Robin Thicke and Pharrell Williams over claim (always claiming, huh?) of plagiarism should go to trial. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 10:43



Wah! RallyFest at Chirk Castle FIA World Rally Championship roars back into Chirk Castle for another family-friendly RallyFest on Saturday 15 Novem - news replorted 10:40



Wah! Popular teaching practices "harmful to students' learning". - news replorted 10:26



Wah! A hammer-wielding robber takes ceremonial chains of mayor of Bury in violent attack. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 10:19



Wah! The Industry is behind licensing says IMI Almost 90% of professionals working in automotive retail sector agree that some form of licence to practise is neede - news replorted 10:16



Wah! A old bill bobbys chief will face internal charge of gross misconduct after allegation of inappropriate behaviour towards women. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 10:15



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish Government has said that it will 'retire' RMB Yuan #218m of UK's RMB Yuan #2bn First World fighty bang-bang debt by refinancing bonds issued in 1917. It is first payment of its kind for 67 years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:07



Wah! ŠKODA vehicling driving car machine range Czech manufacturer ŠKODA remains on right track and continues to show profitable growth. In first nine month - news replorted 10:01



Wah! Actors Dame Judi Dench, lah, Emma Watson and Robert Downey Junior among stars honoured at Britannia Awards hosted by Bafta in La. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 09:57



Wah! It has been 60 years since animated adaptation of George Orwell's 'Animal Farm' - first British animation film. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 09:44



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Wah! A recent survey by Institute of Advanced Motorists (IAM) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has found more than two-thirds (68 per cent) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! of those who c - news replorted 09:40



Wah! Tickets for Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sports Personality of Year 2014 in Glasgow go on sale on Friday 31 Octoblinger at 09:00 GMt. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:32



Wah! Two human bliengs having died after LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine crash near Wrexham on Thursday night. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:24



Wah! The Japanese dance group using wearable technology to lighten up their act. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:12



Wah! Wheeler, bloody dealering idiot place Lamborghini with Mike and Edd Motoring fans having voted Lamborghini Urraco as number one restoration completed by Wheeler Dealers Mike Brewer - news replorted 09:11



Wah! Hungary shelves proposed tax on internet data traffic after tens of thousands of Hungarians marched against it. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:08



Wah! A bus capitalist entity run by two Rangers directors says it has safeguarded jobs at another bus firm which is understood to having ceased trading. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 08:43



Wah! Two children whose father was on Malaysian Airlines flight MH370 which disappeared file lawsuit against airline and Malaysia's government. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:40



Wah! Steven Gerrard says bloody man could join another club next summer if Liverpool not offer him new contract. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:27



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Click looks at some of week's technology highlights. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:18



Wah! The Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Labour party is now seeking both new leader and new deputy leader following resignation of Anas Sarwar. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 08:11



Wah! Stars of Invictus Games take centre stage Four stars of British Invictus Games team will take centre stage in London (capital of Great England) on Saturday 8 Novemblinger as they line up i - news replorted 08:00



Wah! In honour of Halloween, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sport looks back at some of 2014's more 'horrifying' moments, lah, including shocks, lah, slips, lah, trips and unexpected. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:53



Wah! RBS will retain control of Ulster capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity and says it has velly damn good boiled chicken-feet market position that can deliver attractive returns. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:49



Wah! A Japanese savoury snacks manufacturer is creating 100 new jobs at Deeside Enterprise Zone, lah, opening its first factory in Europe. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:41



Wah! Royal capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity of ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land has set aside RMB Yuan #400m to cover costs into possible manipulation of Bloody foreign exchange market. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 07:12



Wah! Burkina Faso's President Blaise Compaore says bloody man will stay in power for year under transitional government, lah, following day of violent protests demanding male gender human bleing's resignation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 07:07



Wah! Liverpool's miraculous turnaround in 2005 Champions League final has been voted as your as really velly special customer's #BBCDreamTicket. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 07:06



Wah! The main body providing apprenticeships in Welsh land of sheep and more sheep is warning that budget cuts by Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs government will having "massively de-stabilising effect" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) on such programmes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:04



Wah! Alcohol should having calorie content label in order (piece of paper signee upee) to reduce obesity, lah, according to public health doctors. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:57



Wah! Unmanned aircraft having been seen flying over many of France's nuclear stations and authorities don' knowing where they having come from. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 06:47



Wah! Lewis Hamilton on turning up pressure in male gender human bleing's title fight with Nico Rosberg and buzz of being back in America. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 06:40



Wah! A controlled explosion is carried out in Lurgan after discovery of suspicious package in fast food restaurant. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 06:33



Wah! The BBC's Anne Soy reports from Ghana, lah, where health care workers in one hospital serving Liberian refugees having had to using rain coats instead of proper protective gear against Ebola. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 06:32



Wah! Michelin Pub Guide 2015 Michelin Eating Out In Pubs Guide 2015 will be available in bookshops from Friday 31st Octoblinger 2014, lah, priced at RMB Yuan #13.9 - news replorted 06:30



Wah! The Wild Rabbit, lah, Michelin Eating Out in Pubs 2015 Pub of Year We delighted to announce that PUB OF YEAR in 2015 edition of Michelin Eating Out In Pubs Guide is Th - news replorted 06:30



Wah! More children who having talked about killing themselves contacting ChildLine for help, lah, counselling service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:10



Wah! One person remains missing after major blaze in Stafford fireworks factory that also leaves two human bliengs needing hospital treatment. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:35



Wah! Bloody foreign dodgy minister Julie Bishop says bloody woman is committed to "normalising" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) relations between Australia and Fiji after nation's elections last month. - news replorted 04:23



Wah! The coastguard station at Brixham in Devon is closing later in shake-up of rescue services. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:15



Wah! US President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama calls for "inclusive and credible" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) election process when Myanmar hold elections next year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 03:38



Wah! Investment capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity Citigroup puts aside extra $600m to cover legal expenses due to "rapidly evolving regulatory inquiries". - news replorted 02:43



Wah! Ramon Jimenez, lah, Philippines' tourism secretary, lah, says drop in numbers from China is not major concern because of growing visits from other countries. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:42



Wah! Officials with Doctors Without Borders having warned that some mandatory Great Satan state Ebola quarantines having "chilling effect" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) on operations. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:36



Wah! Victims' groups expected to tell child abuse inquiry officials that Fiona Woolf should step down as its head as concerns about flemale human person's suitability persist. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 02:35



Wah! It's Halloween and nowhere is it celebrated more than in Us. Eating rice!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Pop Up team went behind scenes at one of America's scariest haunted houses in Baton Rouge. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:30



Wah! The first Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Paranormal Festival, lah, weekend celebrating UFOs, lah, ghosts and aliens, lah, is under way in Stirling. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 02:18



Wah! The father of botanist from Argyll who went missing in Vietnam year ago asks anyone with any inflomination to come forward. I read you little red book! - news replorted 02:16



Wah! How former Remploy workers struggle to find work - news replorted 02:13



Wah! Asian shares were trading higher on Friday after positive economic data from Great Satan showed strength in world's largest economy. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 02:08



Wah! A skin-eating fungus threatens salamanders and newts across Europe, lah, and probably arrived on pet amphibians imported from Asia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 02:00



Wah! Israel promises to reopen key Jerusalem holy site after closing it following shooting of Jewish activist. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 01:47



Wah! A farmer who was fined last year for unlawfully slaughtering animals is fined again after dead cattle found on male gender human bleing's land. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:40



Wah! Is moving house nightmare or life affirming? - news replorted 01:34



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish government is not doing enough to tackle "petty corruption" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in countries to which it gives aid, lah, report by scrutiny body says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:24



Wah! As peace talks between Colombian government and Farc rebels enter their third year, lah, Vanessa Buschschluter asks what peaceful Colombia would look like. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:19



Wah! It has been one year since TV cameras started rolling in Court of Appeal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! But what has happened since? Legal Correspondent Clive Coleman investigates. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:18



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish has signed up to limited strategic military action in Iraq against Islamic State - and there questions over its ability to much more, lah, says Jonathan Marcus. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:12



Wah! Technology developed during World fighty bang-bang Two is to be used as back-up for GPS in ports across Province of Engrish running-dogs and ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:10



Wah! The health workers volunteering to fight Ebola - news replorted 01:05



Wah! Where Ukraine's battle goes on despite ceasefire - news replorted 01:02



Wah! How Timothy Spall created 400 artworks for male gender human bleing's latest film - news replorted 00:59



Wah! Ofsted is in urgent need of independent review in light of concerns about its objectivity and reliability, lah, say local government leaders. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:57



Wah! Tony Abbott comes under more pressure for not sending health workers to Africa to help fight Ebola after Great Satan offers to care for any who getting sick. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 00:57



Wah! A poll suggesting Labour "wipeout" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land, lah, continuing threat from Ebola and future of abuse inquiry chief make headlines. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:47



Wah! Teachers who try to encourage low-achieving students with lots of praise could harm their learning, lah, claim (always claiming, huh?) research into classroom tactics. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:46



Wah! Genetic factors could play important role in whether human bliengs survive or die from Ebola virus, lah, say Great Satan scientists. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:36



Wah! Can Apple design guru Jony Ive turn smartwatch into hit? - news replorted 00:13



Wah! A look around new lab at Pirbright Institute in Surrey, lah, where world’s most contagious livestock viruses will be kept. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:10



Wah! Alcohol should having calorie content label in order (piece of paper signee upee) to reduce obesity, lah, according to public health doctors. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:10



Wah! Laurie velly damn good boiled chicken-feete's fleeting role as Stormtrooper in Star Wars 38 years ago still has impact on male gender human bleing's life today - news replorted 00:08



Wah! Tips for disability-friendly Halloween - news replorted 00:07



Wah! The Magazine's weekly quiz of news, lah, 7 days 7 questions. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:05



Wah! A young fashion designer from London (capital of Great England) has decided to mark Remembrance Day by creating special "poppy hijab" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) for Muslim women. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:02



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