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Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling

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Customer Letter: 1535 / 1528
Elizabeth says...
MAZDA 6Great service, so helpful. We needed a car quickly and everything was done for us in superb time. Dealer was excellent and our Mazda 6 was delivered on time and well presented.

Elizabeth Maciver
22 Howe View
AB51 0PR

Editor Note: Thanks for the letter Liz! Great news that you loved everything and got the Mazda so quickly. Enjoy it in Bonnie Snowwie Scotland! I pass on your thanks to dealer. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1525 / 1528
David says...
FORD FIESTAI was a first time leaser, I was told about Ling's, not too sure when I looked at other sites. All I can say is I kept going back to Ling's, glad I did. A wacky but worthwhile experience, got the car I wanted (Fiesta) at the best price… Dealer Service – Good – No complaints.

David Mcculloch
48 Calderglen Avenue
G72 9UN

Editor Note: No complaints, no regrets :) And you will not regret the Fiesta which is just about the best small car you can get. I especially appreciate you say I had the best price, as you are Scottish :) hahaha! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1520 / 1528
Helen says...
MAZDA 6Ling's service has been excellent. She kept me informed every step of the way and car arrived on specified date. I would highly recommend her service. I also got insurance from the broker she recommended and it was great too! Dealer Service – Excellent.

Helen Mcdowell
The Orchard
Main Road
G82 5JX

Editor Note: What can I say, Helen? ... Everything was "excellent", including your choice of car, the Mazda 6. It was a bargain for a sporty 5 seat family car. Hope you enjoy it zooping around the lake district. Thanks for being so lovely to deal with. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1507 / 1528
Karen says...
VOLVO XC90Ling – I can find no faults with your service in supplying me with my wonderful new Volvo XC90. I found the whole process very easy and compliment you and your staff on your great attention to detail. I was kept informed every step of the way and will certainly be back to you in 3 years time. Well done on a great service to your customers – I really felt I came first!

Dealer service – Excellent – they provided excellent service – no complaints at all.

Karen Derrick
Kinchurdy Road
Boat Of Garten
PH24 3BP

Editor Note: Wow! That's a very nice letter Karen. Thanks. The XC90 will be very useful in the middle of nowhere in Scotland. Especially in the snow. Lovely to deal with you, it was great fun :) Go and play with it in the lochs and glens, hahaha! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1471 / 1528
Andrew says...
 Amazingly fast transaction, faultless professionalism. See you in two years for another. Dealer Service – EXCELLENT. True gent delivering car in pristine condition.

Andrew Neilson
4 Fintry Gardens
G61 4RJ

Editor Note: Andrew, fantastic! How great that I am getting such nice letters from Mercedes customers, as Merc UK are trying to kill my supply of new cars. I really think that I can beat Merc at their own "quality" game. Fantastic letter, thanks. Enjoy the CLK. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1451 / 1528
Keith says...
JEEP WRANGLERLingsCars is a great company to deal with, the whole experience was fun AND efficient. The communication was/is fantastic, you always know what is happening with your car as the process goes on. I will definitely be back for my next car. Dealer service was average: Quick to deliver vehicle, bust slow to rectify problem.

Keith Hart
9 Lady Street
Tain, Ross-Shire
IV20 1XE

Editor Note: You had a missing wheel nut key on your Jeep Wrangler, and it took the dealer an age to get it to you. That was the problem. Apart from that, you have a mammoth car at a really cheap price - what a vehicle the Jeep is for your business! You arrange and produce shows and exhibitions. Thans so much for the brilliant comments about my service, Keith! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1412 / 1528
Katherine says...
AUDI A3This is the first time I have leased a car and it been a very good experience. Very competitive costs and easy to communicate- no pushy sales staff!! I have been impressed with the service and quick response to all questions raised during the process. I have in fact recommended you to a number of people who have asked me how it all went! I woul d not hesitate to lease again and I will be back for another Audi in three years time.

Excellent delivery - very happy with the service - they called arranged delivery and were waiting there with the car. Very impressed!!

Katherine Yates
Address Withheld
Dunoon, Argyll
PA23 ***

Editor Note: Katie, super letter, thanks! Glad you were happy :) Always happy when customers say it was a good experience, that's what I like. Not really about the cars, more about people I think. I pass your regards to the supplier. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1406 / 1528
Adnan says...
BMW M3 COUPETruly exceptional service. Beats all the other competitors in the market. Trust me when I say it is a ''personalised' service that Ling has set up! Response are near instant and a history of all communications is kept in one 'Lingo' page so you can always go back if you lose your way. Super dooper. Excellent delivery of my new M3 by the BMW dealer!

Adnan Ali
14 Meadowhill
Newton Mearns
G77 6SX

Editor Note: BMW UK, are you listening? BMW UK are being consistent bastards to me by trying to get me to stop supplying their new cars. They send a solicitor letter every week. However, I will not be brow-beaten. If BMW UK read this letter, they can see how my service is actually better than theirs, as they manage nowhere near the communication excellence and customer satisfaction I achieve. This was a BMW M3, a £50k car! That Adnan thought I beat every other competitor for service makes me very happy. All customers get the same treatment - the very best in the industry. BMW UK, feel free to apologise for bullying me with your multi-£million lawyer budgets and threats. Thanks for comments, Adnan. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1372 / 1528
Steven says... is an oasis in a desert of faceless, dull companies. Her service has been excellent, despite the long delay in securing finance. Her website and correspondence stand head and shoulders above the others and I couldn't find a better price anywhere so that's a tick in that box as well. A joke, a laugh, good service and a good price. A winning combination. Excellent delivery, exactly what was expected.

Steven Stalker
2 Overalmond House

Editor Note: Apart from the damn slow finance companies (they are a complete pain post-crunch) we got everything sorted and you are very happy, I think, Steve. You work in a company which is also at the cutting edge of cheap and growing sector. Keep up the good work. Enjoy the new Mazda 3. You are dead right about other faceless, dull companies! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1365 / 1528
Keith says...
SMART FORTWO COUPEWe're delighted with our new wee car, the Smart coupe ForTwo. Ling- thanks for everything you've done - We'll certainly come back to you!! Good delivery as expected.

Keith Morrice
94a Market Street
AB21 9JH

Editor Note: Keith, you are a finance manager for an underwater oil rig company. I appreciate that you must have figured out this is the cheapest way to get a new Smartie car. Lovely to deal with you, wee you in a couple of years, eh? Enjoy the Smart! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1358 / 1528
Craig says...
 LINGsCARS is a brilliant business. It allows me, as a young professional to have the car I want without the cost of repairs and a car that depreciates in value. Ling was lovely to deal with, speedy responses and a good fun attitude. I am a very happy customer. Excellent delivery, friendly driver, couldn't fault anything.

Craig Lawrence
23 Conner Avenue

Editor Note: Super duper letter, Craig! Thanks so much. You forgot to mention that as a Scottish ethnic you are tight in the money department, so I am sure you appreciated the fast car for slow money! Happy, happy! Your only challenge is insurance cost, but as car was as cheap as deep fried Mars bar, you have plenty of cash left for that. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1312 / 1528
Colin says...
HONDA CR-VI am writing to you after receiving my Honda CR-V. This is the first time I have used contract hire. I was a wee bit sceptical at first especially looking at other websites. They would display a price to get your attention but when asked for a quote it was usually very different. Your website is very informative, if a bit quirky but the price you see is the price you pay and you are very competitive.

Your service is outstanding and your Lingo system is very good. Your reply times are excellent; I never had to chase you for anything. This is what made the experience so stress free. You communicate very well which makes the transaction simple.

My Honda arrived at 11am. Exactly at the time arranged with the dealer. I am absolutely delighted with it. I have recommended you to all my friends and family and I will be back in three years for another deal.


Colin Kersley
North Connel
By Oban
PA37 1RE

Editor Note: Colin, thanks for the kind comments, especially about LINGO. I agree, many other websites have out of date or untrue pricing - they think it is clever to try and trick people, eh? I like "stress-free", too, so I do everything as fast as possible :) Glad you like the Honda CRV! A lovely car. I am pleased that as a first-time contract hire user you were so happy with everything. Thanks! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1279 / 1528
Daina says...
FORD FOCUS ESTATEI was still awaiting quotes from some other companies 6 months down the line, but Ling was very efficient and quick. Very good service - I have already recommended you to many friends. I love my new Ford Focus and I will get my next cars from Ling, too! Good delivery.

Daina Carnochan
11 Melrose Place, Kintore
AB51 0SY

Editor Note: Daina, you are a veterinary in the North of Scotland. I expect you have enough trouble with all the pesky animals (and owners) to have to worry about dealing with car supply idiots. So, I am glad I came out top for you. Why some other companies don't perform - I don't know? They are silly for missing out on the business. Back to those cats and dogs (or cows) and hope the Focus Estate does the job, carrying all the pets around :). You also have a nice name! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1274 / 1528
James says...
 Special deal on my SAAB 9-3 Sportwagon, excellent service and great communication. Will deal with Ling again in the future. Ling's staff are great, too. Great freebies, I'm hoping to get to China soon to spend all that free money! Excellent delivery from the dealer, no problems, good communication.

James Macmillan
Brevin House

Editor Note: You have a new SAAB Sportwagon at a great price, James! Hope you enjoy it along with your easter eggs up in Shetland! My God, you must have nose bleeds every day, being that far North. Thanks for kind words, it's great when customers are so happy. I'm particularly pleased you felt my communication was good, this is an area where I am world leader :) See you in a few years! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1270 / 1528
Vivien says...
AUDI A3Ling, everything went great with my new Audi A3. Service was superb, with no complaints. Well done!!! Excellent car delivery.

Vivien Cumming
8 Hutchison Terrace
AB10 7NN

Editor Note: Vivien, great to hear you are a happy bunny at Easter. These A3s are great cars for a cheap price. I'm really pleased you love your new car. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1234 / 1528
Scott says...
 This is our third car ordered from Ling and as usual the customer service has been quick and excellent. I would highly recommend LINGsCARS and will keep using Ling for our fleet requirements. Good delivery on the SAAB, no problems to report.

Scott Allison
Abica Ltd
9 Dava Street
G51 2JA

Editor Note: Scott, job done! Good customer on your 3rd car from me, next car I send you free mats! Each mat pack contains 4 mats, which means you will have one for each car - easy. How lovely it is to deal with you, Scott, and it's so easy to remember the name of someone who is called after the country he lives in :) - Ling

Customer Letter: 1220 / 1528
Gareth says...
HONDA CIVICLing, my wife and I were very impressed with your service. Getting our car from you was a no-brainer. Monthly payments were half than if we bought the Honda Civic. We went to a dealer for a test drive, loved the car, then signed up with you. End to end in 3-weeks.

Your style is a refreshing change, very prompt at updates and answering questions. Love the LINGO system. I've already got family getting cars from you based on me raving about you. I look forward to getting my next car from you. Excellent delivery, Honda driver was very prompt and polite.

Gareth Hodgson
Address Withheld
PA1 ***

Editor Note: I withhold your address for security because you do important stuff for Australia. Gareth, so pleased - you sound like a happy bunny with your Civic. You should not take advantage of dealers' goodwill by using them as a test-drive facility (mmmmmpppfffff :). Poor souls. LINGO - thanks so much for the comments, I put a hell of a lot of work into that. Now, I am dealing with being flooded with your family :) Enjoy that Honda! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1218 / 1528
William says...
CITROEN C-CROSSERStress free, straight forward transaction on my new Citroen C-Crosser, and nice Chinese sweets, too! I will be back in 23 months!! Excellent delivery, courteous and knowledgeable driver.

William Smith
14 Cowieson Crescent
AB41 7GJ

Editor Note: Good, good. That's what I like, smooth, easy and fuss-free. You should see me paddling like a mental duck under the water, hahahahaha! Bloody motor industry never easy, BUT, I keep the stress away from super customers like you :) Enjoy the C-Crosser, Willy! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1207 / 1528
Mark says...
 Very helpful and friendly. No problems answering my silly questions as a first time lease customer.

Your website is very "interesting" but actually works very well - especially the LINGO system.

As for the Honda Civic Type-R itself, it has a funky and comfortable interior, brilliant VTEC engine and massive boot. Huge grip, but the handling is rather inert. Not a true Type-R perhaps, but a grown up one. Excellent delivery, friendly and informative.

Mark Fisher
7 Morven Circle
AB32 6WD

Editor Note: Mark, as you are a software developer, never mind the car - thanks so much for the comments about LINGO! These Type R's are more sensible than the previous model, but still look and go great. Thanks for the letter, you were a star customer - even a first timer! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1152 / 1528
John says...
CITROEN C4 PICASSOI've been Linged! That is, carried through a first experience of renting a car of my choice by Ling Valentine, and made to feel a special customer. Wonderful to feel confidence in every part of the transaction from first enquiry until the prompt delivery of the car as requested.

The service from the dealer regarding supply of my Citroen C4 Picasso was fine. They seemed to sit on the paperwork for transferring my cherished plate to the car (it was actually the DVLA - Ling) which delayed my car a bit.

Good delivery. My Citroen is lovely, drives smoothly and will be economical on fuel, tax and insurance.

John Dougall
17 Haining Place

Editor Note: The delay was the DVLA, Jack, not the dealer. However, your C4 Picasso will certainly be economical on road tax as you get that for free! :) You were a superstar customer, and you sent me many videos, from your webcam. At one stage we were chatting via video back and forth, despite you are a bloody "silver" surfer. It was so cool! I'm so pleased you enjoyed the experience, you were lovely to deal with. Thanks. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1137 / 1528
Leigh says...
FIAT PANDAGood service, good website - quick response times - very impressed with car - will be coming back in 3 years time - liked the extras in the post too :). Once the date was finalised, delivery of my new Fiat Panda was very good.

Leigh Mckenna
31 Perkhill Road
AB31 4TG

Editor Note: Another Kung-Fu Panda! Nice to have good website comments from a freelance web designer/developer! Thanks so much. You were a superstar to deal with, Leigh. Hope you enjoy the Panda diesel! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1076 / 1528
Ross says...
 This is my 3rd contract hire, first from Ling, and won't be the last. Very, very good. Delivered on time. She kept me updated at every stage. So happy I offered to marry her! Will try again in 2 years. Lol. Excellent delivery, very good, pleased to do business.

Ross Neilson
Ross Neilson Butchers
52 Broomton Road
G21 3RU

Editor Note: Hahahaha, why would I marry a butcher (and I am already married!)? You will smell of sausages :) Having said that, good butchers are quite rich and I would have good supply of belly pork. Hmmm..... So happy you love the Astra Sport Hatch. Mind the blood on the carpets! Lovely to deal with you, you are nutter. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1066 / 1528
Ashita says...


Just a short note (adding to the 1,000s already posted online) to say a big, big thank you for delivering our new car to us. The lack of hassle, the speediness of response and the general all round happiness that surrounds you and your team actually makes changing a car fun instead of the horror story it usually is. A lot of “professional” dealerships could learn from you!

At least four different brokers told me that an SLK at the price you delivered was an impossible but clearly you were willing to go the extra mile. Will be back in 24 months to get another plus will be extolling the virtues of leasing from you to anyone who is willing to listen.

Ps. Thank you for the free lunch the Fuku noodles still crack me up every time I look at the packet

Ashita Waterston (Dr)
Address withheld
G63 ***

Editor Note: Ashita! Wow, fantastic letter, thanks. You have a damn cheap and damn nice Merc SLK. I will let everyone know with a cancerous tumor that you are the bees-knees to talk to. Make sure you keep your convertible roof in place in certain areas of Glasgow! Have a great time in the car! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1046 / 1528
Michael says...
CarHi Ling.

Thanks for the excellent service you provided me. The car is fantastic and was delivered quicker than expected. Your friendly manner and wacky website really put me at ease and made the whole experience a pleasant one. The speed you answered every question I had was a breath of fresh air. Every promise made was kept. All be back in three years for my next car. Delivery was excellent, delivered on time by a very nice man. Best regards...

Michael Atkinson
Druid House
PA21 2AB

Editor Note: Mick, what a strange job you have - you are an Aquaculture Marine Operative! Whatever that does... I hope you can squeeze all your aqualungs and flippers into your new Qashqai, and that you have a great time up in Scotland. Send me a nice fish. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1023 / 1528
Jens-Ulrich says...
CarLing ist providing us a fantastic personalised service, her prices are very competitive. She and her staff were doing their atmost to provide the right car on short notice, just in time to go on our holidays. The website is cutting edge and the personal touch of dealing with her customers ensures that you don't want to use any other company again. My Zafira was supplied in time without any problems.

Jens-Ulrich Fischer
22 Dalriada Drive
G64 4ES

Editor Note: Achtung! Ulrich, you are a German, us bloody foreigners have to stick together :) Your Zafira was going to be a diesel but due to massive Diesel Particulate Filter problems on these diesel Zafira cars we changed it to a petrol at short notice. You noticed this on German and Austrian Opel Zafira message boards and forums, too. I would not recommend diesel Zafiras. I am so glad you were happy with the petrol one. Hope I met your efficiency standards, I know Germans are keen on doing it right, unlike the bloody French. I have to say you were a wonderful customer; I learned my English watching Dad's Army (really!) and you have burst my imagined German stereotype bubble. Captain Mainwaring is wrong. You are certainly NOT a stupid boy! :) - Ling

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Wah! Less cross-country in "knickers and polo shirt" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) and improved facilities in schools would improve PE for girls, lah, says Victoria Pendleton. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 16:17

Wah! The short circuit delaying restart of Large Hadron Collider has been fixed, lah, after blast of high current melted culpable metal particle. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:57

Wah! The RSPCA says it is looking after so many abandoned horses, lah, donkeys and ponies that it cannot take in any more. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:56

Wah! All systems go for thrilling 2015 Porsche Carrera Cup GB season Revitalised Championship with new teams and fresh talent kicks off at Brands Hatch. - news replorted 15:56

Wah! Members of the public advised not to approach "dangerous" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) convicted murderer who breached male gender human bleing's prison release licence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:50

Wah! Arizona's governor vetoes bill that would having required names of officers involved in shootings to be kept secret for 60 days. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:41

Wah! Real Madrid and Welsh land of sheep and more sheep forward Gareth Bale takes part in NBA's half-court challenge, lah, testing male gender human bleing's basketball shooting accuracy. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 15:34

Wah! Residents of Buenos Aires woke up to empty streets on Tuesday as one-day strike by transportation workers began. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 15:29

Wah! The Great Satan has pledged to tackle climate change by cutting its carbon emissions 26-28% by 2025. - news replorted 15:27

Wah! The first full day of campaigning - news replorted 15:15

Wah! The UN's human rights chief warns Yemen is "on verge of total collapse", lah, as Saudi-led coalition aircraft bombard Houthi rebels. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:15

Wah! Playing in European Under-21s Championship could be of benefit to Province of Engrish running-dogs's young stars, lah, writes Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sport's Alistair Magowan. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 15:08

Wah! The Freight Transport Association’s Van Excellence scheme has reached its century – announcing that it has now accredite - news replorted 15:04

Wah! Thomas a. Ai-yaa!!! Schmid, lah, Chief Operating Officer Ryundali Motor Europe Ryundali Motor Europe has announced appointment of Thomas a. Ai-yaa!!! Schmid to position of Chief Operating Officer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 15:01

Wah! Praesa, lah, reading project aimed at children and young human bliengs in South Africa, lah, is named winner of 2015 Astrid Lindgren Memorial Award. I read you little red book! - news replorted 14:56

Wah! An additional $300m is being put aside to deal with possible costs arising from Germanwings plane crash, lah, Lufthansa officials say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 14:54

Wah! Chris Ingram to debut ‘Coupe Franche’ livery on male gender human bleing's Plugleot 208 R2 Plugleot UK’s junior rally star Chris Ingram will debut striking black and red ‘Coupe Franche’(a diagonal sharp line di - news replorted 14:47

Wah! A box and plastic balls used to see whether public think election campaign will make any difference. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 14:42

Wah! No disciplinary action was ever taken against Hillsborough match commander for male gender human bleing's "wicked lie" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) about disaster, lah, inquests told. I read you little red book! - news replorted 14:31

Wah! New renewable generating capacity broke 100GW barrier in 2014, lah, equivalent to entire fleet of nuclear power plants in US, lah, UN report shows. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:28

Wah! Mitsubishi ASX Following success of Mlitslublishli Motors’ sponsorship of Channel 4 Documentaries in 2014, lah, partnership has been ren - news replorted 14:23

Wah! Does bloody annoying Blitish being large net borrower from other states actually matter? - news replorted 14:20

Wah! Former Province of Engrish running-dogs forward Matt Le Tissier reveals that bloody man will compete in Channel 4 quiz show Countdown. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 14:08

Wah! A man beaten with iron bars by masked gang blames dissident republican paramilitaries for brutal attack at male gender human bleing's home. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 14:05

Wah! CarPlan Demon Shine is to sponsor Province of Engrish running-dogs’s friendly against Italy tonight (Tuesday 31 March), lah, to be broadcast live on I - news replorted 14:04

Wah! (L-R) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! Joe Chatting, lah, Steven Murr and Richard Curle EXETER Mlitslublishli expensive dealeringship buildling Livery Dole is celebrating after winning regional award for outstanding Motability custom - news replorted 14:02

Wah! Microsoft shifts its entry-range tablets to Intel processors, lah, allowing them to run wider range of software. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 14:00

Wah! Armed men take hostage Turkish prosecutor heading inquiry into death of boy during anti-government protests in 2013. - news replorted 13:48

Wah! Models with BMI of less than 18 could be fined or sent to prison, lah, under legislation being considered by France. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:46

Wah! Cinderella, lah, Kenneth Branagh's live-action remake of Disney animation, lah, tops bloody annoying Blitish box office in its first week of release. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:45

Wah! A woman and child taken to hospital following incident involving bus in Swansea city centre. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:44

Wah! Giant slides by artist Carsten Holler returning to London (capital of Great England) this summer, lah, this clock time result at Hayward Gallery on London's South Bank. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 13:32

Wah!  (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) Government backs electric motorcycles and scooters Electric motorcycles and scooters will now qualify for Government subsidy, lah, under plans announced by Office for Low E - news replorted 13:29

Wah! Islamic State militants kill at least 30 people, lah, including women and children, lah, in government-held village in central Syria, lah, activists say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 13:28

Wah! Even though public not like it, lah, politicians bound to turn election campaign personal, lah, says Gavin Hewitt. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 13:27

Wah! George North will see consultant neurosurgeon to help Northampton Saints assess when Welsh land of sheep and more sheep wing can return. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:24

Wah! Birmingham Bears, lah, T20 Blast champions, lah, sign New Zealand skipper Brendon McCullum for this summer's tournament. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 13:21

Wah! Britain's leading clubs set for huge financial boost for competing in Champions League and Europa League. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:20

Wah! A UN donors' conference set up to raise billions of dollars for Syria opens in Kuwait with host country, lah, EU and Great Satan among those pledging aid. I read you little red book! - news replorted 13:06

Wah! After lengthy battle, lah, two firms having said they will seek talks in future disputes and leniency for each other in existing ones. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:00

Wah! Richard Harrison, lah, Director of SEAT UK SEAT bloody annoying Blitish will welcome Richard Harrison as its new Director on 1 April, lah, following departure of Neil Williamson, lah, who le - news replorted 13:00

Wah! Rolls-Royce Wraith launch film accepted into BFI archive groundbreaking Rolls-Royce Motor Cars Wraith launch film, lah, ‘And World Stood Still’, lah, has been accepted into BF - news replorted 13:00

Wah! Lot 114 - 1988 Porsche 959 Coupe International auctioneers Coys having lined up superb selection of over 60 classic cars worth €8 million for their Techn - news replorted 12:56

Wah! Rob Durrant PFPR Communications, lah, one of UK’s leading specialist automotive PR and event agencies, lah, has made two significant appoi - news replorted 12:52

Wah! How winds having been battering parts of Britain - news replorted 12:49

Wah! A 33-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man admits killing 11-earth-years old happy birthday to you, girl in hit-and-run in Glasgow's Maryhill area last November. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 12:49

Wah! McDonald's plans to test all-day breakfast in Us. Eating rice!! Why can't you tellibly lovely custlingmer buy Egg McMuffin after 10:30? - news replorted 12:49

Wah! Thailand's Prime dodgy minister Prayuth Chan-ocha says bloody man has asked for permission to end martial law, lah, replacing it with new curbs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:46

Wah! Leeds Rhinos captain Kevin Sinfield is to join Championship funny shape ball-game union side Yorkshire Carnegie at end of current funny shape ball-game league season. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 12:43

Wah! The silly kick-kick game Association say they "disappointed" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) Great Britain silly kick-kick game teams will not compete at Rio 2016. - news replorted 12:32

Wah! According to Martha Lane Fox, lah, role internet can play in bloody annoying Blitish should be one of key issues in upcoming election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 12:30

Wah! A resident from Penarth housing complex has complained that refurbishment has turned male gender human bleing's home into 'Legoland'. - news replorted 12:26

Wah! A fifth-storey hospital window falls on woman in London (capital of Great England) Bridge area during high winds. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:19

Wah! Chichester Festival Theatre is to lose both its artistic director Jonathan Church and executive director Alan Finch at end of September 2016. - news replorted 12:19

Wah! Poorer children 'have smaller brains' than their more prosperous counterparts, lah, researchers from California having found. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:18

Wah! Amelia Jones's mother says bloody woman was shocked when flemale human person's accused father said bloody man did not 'hold grudges against baby'. - news replorted 12:09

Wah! France's Senate rejects planned 2013 law penalising human bliengs who pay for sex and decides to maintain offence of soliciting. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 12:09

Wah! The 2015 Bonhams London (capital of Great England) to Brighton Veteran LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Run In recognition of large number of American automobiles regularly taking part in annual Veteran LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Run, lah, this yea - news replorted 12:02

Wah! Mazda’s all-new MX-5 to debut at velly damn good boiled chicken-feetwood Festival of Speed In year that sees debut of three all-new models, lah, Madzla will be showcasing newest members of its stylish, lah, spiri - news replorted 12:00

Wah! Record-Breaker Kirobo Returns From Space Robot-astronaut rewarded with two Guinness World Records for its work on board International Space Station - news replorted 11:56

Wah! Rising numbers of new teachers leaving profession within year of qualifying, lah, says teachers' union leader. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 11:46

Wah! Dundalk man has been sentenced to six months in prison after two separate assaults on medical staff - news replorted 11:44

Wah! Twenty-five new jobs being created at Narberth water bottling plant after capitalist entity announced investment of RMB Yuan #5.5m. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 11:41

Wah! A teacher who admitted having sex with teenage girl and asked flemale human person's to sign "slave contract" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) with him, lah, is banned from classroom. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 11:40

Wah! It is slowest recovery on record, lah, but living standards now back to where they were at clock time result of last election - news replorted 11:27

Wah! Peruvian Prime dodgy minister Ana Jara is sacked by Congress over allegations that country's spy agency gathered inflomination on thousands of Peruvians. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:19

Wah! A huge power outage hits several cities in Turkey, lah, including Istanbul's public transport network. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 11:18

Wah! The wife and adult children of late actor and comedian Robin Williams agree to meet outside court to try and resolve their arglingument over male gender human bleing's belongings. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:15

Wah! Wolf Run Team Vocis recent diagnosis of highly regarded, lah, senior member of automotive engineering community has raised awareness of - news replorted 11:13

Wah! MG opens multi-million expensive dealeringship buildling in heart of London MG has announced it will open prestigious multi-million pound flagship expensive dealeringship buildling in heart of London’s Piccadilly. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:00

Wah! Harman International Industries, lah, Incorporated (NYSE:HAR), lah, leading global infotainment, lah, audio and enterprise automati - news replorted 11:00

Wah! Gary Hall, lah, Culture Coventry and David Bond, lah, Footman James UK’s finest transport museum has teamed up with one of country’s leading classic LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine insurlince brokers, lah, to hold - news replorted 11:00

Wah! NFL side Atlanta Falcons lose their draft pick for 2016 and fined $350,000 for using fake crowd noise at home games. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:57

Wah! Deflation in eurozone eased during monthly number-three while rate of unemployment dipped slightly in February, lah, figures show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 10:45

Wah! A British tourist killed in terror attack at museum in Tunisia died from gunshot wounds, lah, coroner hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:45

Wah! A old bill bobbys watchdog calls for code of practice, lah, backed by law, lah, to govern controversial policy of stop-and-search. - news replorted 10:44

Wah! The financial well-being of bloody annoying Blitish households improved last year, lah, but overall it is not much better than it was five years ago, lah, according to official figures. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:36

Wah! Turkish Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters back sweeping new powers for old bill bobbys - and critics fear that intolerance is becoming entrenched, lah, Selin Girit reports from Istanbul. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 10:35

Wah! Joey Essex talks about interviewing Nick Clegg, lah, praising deputy prime dodgy minister for male gender human bleing's "honesty". - news replorted 10:28

Wah! Intelligent Energy's motive managing director James Batchelor On monthly number-three 26th, lah, government announced that RMB Yuan #45 million will be made available to help taxis in London (capital of Great England) and other cities - news replorted 10:20

Wah! Five years after being diagnosed with terminal leukaemia, lah, Australian broadcaster and poet Clive James says bloody man is near to death but thankful for life. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:19

Wah! An airline passenger's touching handwritten garbling written down on paper message thanking flemale human person's pilots for taking flemale human person's home is being shared across Twitter. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:15

Wah! Red Arrows regulars at FoS, lah, and return in 2015 Today velly damn good boiled chicken-feetwood is delighted to officially launch 2015 Festival of Speed – for first clock time result exclusively online. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:00

Wah! Honda’s flagship production facility in Europe, lah, Rondla of bloody annoying Blitish Manufacturing will become global production hub for th - news replorted 09:58

Wah! TomTom Traffic Index congested road Traffic congestion in cities across bloody annoying Blitish has worsened considerably over past year, lah, according to major new report - news replorted 09:54

Wah! Top Gear executive producer Andy Wilman denies bloody man is quitting show after leaked email from him thanking staff and marking end of era. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 09:52

Wah! The chairman of South Africa's power utility resigns following calls for him to be sacked over allegations of interfering with operations. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:51

Wah! The UK's economy grew at faster pace than initially estimated last year, lah, revised official figures show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 09:39

Wah! Virginia Woolf's final garbling written down on paper message final garbling written down on paper message was found by flemale human person's husband Leonard on day bloody woman disappeared. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:33

Wah! Winds of up to 97mph hit parts of Welsh land of sheep and more sheep as motorists warned to expect difficult conditions on roads. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:10

Wah! A study finds that ants on board International Space Station still using teamwork to search new areas, lah, despite falling off walls of their containers for up to eight seconds. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:09

Wah! Italian online fashion retailer Yoox agrees all-share merger deal London-based rival Net-a-Porter. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 08:59

Wah! Boom clock time result for British LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine industry Britain’s booming LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine manufacturing industry has received yet another huge boost with three major manufacturers announci - news replorted 08:44

Wah! Myanmar's President Thein Sein witnesses signing of draft ceasefire agreement between government and 16 rebel groups. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:33

Wah! The village of Botton in North Yorkshire has been home to human bliengs with learning disabilities for 60 years, lah, but there claim (always claiming, huh?) that changes to employment laws posing threat to community. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 08:24

Wah! Filming on fifth Pirates of Caribbean film is delayed until 15 rainy season-month Aplil as star Johnny Depp continues to recover from hand injury. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 08:16

Wah! One week on from Germanwings plane crash in Alps, lah, search for victims' remains intensifies. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:14

Wah! Plaid Cymru has not yet convinced Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs voters to switch from Labour, lah, former Plaid leader Lord Elis-Thomas says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:01

Wah! Two men rescued after tug boat they were working on capsized and sank off Fawley marine terminal in Southampton Water. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 07:59

Wah! Super-Duper-Chinese-State tech giant Huawei Technologies says profits jumped third last year, lah, boosted by strong performances in all its businesses. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:54

Wah! Kingfisher, lah, owner of DIY chains B&Q and Screwfix, lah, is to close about 60 B&Q stores in bloody annoying Blitish and autonomous province of Guinness drinkers over next two years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:42

Wah! Louis Tomlinson calls Naughty Boy "inconsiderate" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) after bloody man shares new Zayn Malik track on Twitter. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 07:29

Wah! Normandy Garage, lah, Guildford It’s no joke – MG’s latest, bloody dealering idiot place will start trading on rainy season-month Aplil 1 as brand’s surge in sales continues. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:00

Wah! Last hours of intensive diplomacy over Iran's nuclear programme take place in Switzerland ahead of Tuesday's deadline for long-awaited deal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 06:57

Wah! Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs authors Alexander McCall Smith and Irvine Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs among six writers nominated for award celebrating year's funniest books. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:45

Wah! The BBC's Lina Sinjab spent day with Um Bassam, lah, Syrian Palestinian mother of five who fled Syria for Lebanon. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 06:37

Wah! "I knowing what I need to do" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) - Bubba Watson is more relaxed as bloody man defends Masters title for second time, lah, writes Iain Carter. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 06:26

Wah! Northern Ireland's five education and library boards will cease to exist as of midnight on Tuesday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:16

Wah! Nigeria's Muhammadu Buhari edges ahead of President velly damn good boiled chicken-feetluck Jonathan in early election counts, lah, though key states yet to declare. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:13

Wah! The Liberal Democrats will fight to build stronger economy and fairer society for Wales, lah, Nick Clegg says, lah, as bloody man launches party's Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs campaign for general election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 06:11

Wah! A 16-earth-years old happy birthday to you, Singaporean is charged and given S$20,000 bail over YouTube video criticising late leader Lee Kuan Yew and Christianity. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:09

Wah! A woman who lost flemale human person's brother at Hillsborough says bloody woman can no longer face regularly attending inquests, lah, one year after they began. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 06:04

Wah! A tenth of 12 to 13-year-olds worried they "addicted" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to pornography, lah, study by NSPCC ChildLine service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service has found. I read you little red book! - news replorted 06:01

Wah! A young woman talks about how flemale human person's boyfriend's pornography habit led to him abusing flemale human person's when bloody woman was 13. - news replorted 06:00

Wah! At least six human bliengs having died in landslides following floods in Indian-administered Kashmir, lah, officials say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 05:54

Wah! Youngsters who need treatment for mental illnesses being sent to Province of Engrish running-dogs despite there being beds available at new RMB Yuan #2.5m unit in Wales. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:49

Wah! Britain and United States having voiced concerns about irregularities in counting of votes after Nigeria's elections. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:44

Wah! Intense negotiations over Iran's nuclear programme enter final day in Switzerland, lah, ahead of deadline to reach preliminary deal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 05:11

Wah! The governor of Indiana strongly defends male gender human bleing's contentious religious freedom law, lah, amid backlash from gay rights supporters, lah, including some famous names. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:37

Wah! Despite volatility in its Asian business, lah, world's largest spirits maker, lah, Diageo, lah, says 50% of its products' sales growth will come from region. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 04:11

Wah! Some of biggest names in entertainment having re-launched music subscription service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service Tidal, lah, which they claim (always claiming, huh?) will change musical history. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 04:10

Wah! Binge drinking is costing bloody annoying Blitish taxpayers RMB Yuan #4.9bn year, lah, study has suggested. I read you little red book! - news replorted 04:03

Wah! Japan extends sanctions against North Korea for two more years, lah, citing no progress in talks on abducted Japanese nationals. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:02

Wah! Fossils from ocean floor yielding clues to Indian monsoon millions of years ago. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 03:59

Wah! How Ebola still affects love lives and wallets - news replorted 03:44

Wah! Betty Churcher, lah, one of Australia's most popular and innovative arts administrators, lah, dies at age of 84. - news replorted 03:42

Wah! Plaid Cymru will using its influence in hung parliament to "unleash Wales' economic potential", lah, party leader Leanne Wood says, lah, as party launches its election manifesto. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 03:38

Wah! A Malaysian court finds local man guilty of murdering two British medical students in Borneo. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 03:35

Wah! Do trade treaties that include investor-state arglingument settlements as right pose threat to democracy from multinational companies? - news replorted 03:19

Wah! Uganda circumcision truck fights HIV - news replorted 03:10

Wah! How Greek nude shaped future - news replorted 02:41

Wah! The true story of this refugee girl's 'surrender' - news replorted 01:59

Wah! The teens who make their dolls tell stories - news replorted 01:58

Wah! The Syrians who nearly died in tank of melted chocolate - news replorted 01:55

Wah! The art forger who fooled museums for 30 years - news replorted 01:53

Wah! The head of MI6 unveils blue bloody Engrish Heritage plaque in Whitehall in memory of first chief of Secret Service. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:53

Wah! The anti-corruption Aam Admi Party is embroiled in feud and looks headed for split, lah, writes Soutik Biswas. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:51

Wah! Samira Ahmed looks at how Sir Kenneth Branagh, lah, noted for male gender human bleing's Shakespearean productions, lah, ended up directing live-action Cinderella. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 01:50

Wah! Researchers at Smithsonian Institution in Washington say whale communication depends on jaw movements and methods these mammals using to catch food. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:44

Wah! What drives candidates to spend months knocking on doors, lah, when they knowing they having no chance of winning when polling day comes around? - news replorted 01:33

Wah! A Red Cross employee has been killed and another hurtee-hurtee in gun attack by suspected Islamist militants in Mali, lah, aid organisation says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:22

Wah! Pledges on economy, lah, businesses and mental health expected from Westminster's party leaders as general election campaigning continues. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:15

Wah! Some of biggest names in entertainment having re-launched music subscription service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service Tidal, lah, which they claim (always claiming, huh?) will change musical history. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 01:15

Wah! McLaren 570S Coupé McLaren has completed its three tier model strategy with global reavealingly showing Great Satan of first in its Sports Series family: - news replorted 01:00

Wah! A mental health charity which treats military veterans says referrals having increased by 26% in last year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:45

Wah! Tuesday's papers mark beginning of formal election campaign with raft of stories about scope and nature of spending cuts which would be likely after general election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:44

Wah! Can excessive salaries be curbed? - news replorted 00:21

Wah! Glasgow School of Art is due to announce details of architect chosen to lead restoration of fire-damaged Mackintosh building. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 00:14

Wah! In series looking at fighty bang-bang in Ukraine and success of truce signed last month in Minsk, lah, Natalia Antelava and Abdujalil Abdurasulov meet villager still living by frontline. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:12

Wah! Patient safety campaigners due to meet ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's health dodgy minister to demand stronger measures in wake of series of health scandals. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:12

Wah! Healthcare, lah, house-buying, lah, poverty and austerity focus for ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's political parties on day two of general election campaigning. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 00:07

Wah! It would be "national disgrace" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) if Province of Engrish running-dogs's best youngsters not play at U21 Euros, lah, says ex-striker Gary Lineker. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:03

Wah! Lewis Moody and Land Rover searching for funny shape ball-game World Cup mascots Land Rover is searching for youngsters to become official mascots for funny shape ball-game World Cup 2015 which kicks off later this ye - news replorted 00:01

Wah! Brake, lah, road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu safety charity, lah, has released resource pack aimed at helping SMEs improve safety of staff who controlling in driving manner - news replorted 00:01

Wah! A substantial number of teenagers experimenting with e-cigarettes, lah, even those who having never smoked, lah, study suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:00

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