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Ling V
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Randall

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Holly
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Wai
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CAR LEASING
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Note: I live inside this website Monday to Friday 9am-6pm, to give you the very best service and make your experience a happy one! - I am Ling, accept no substitutes
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You can trust me! ... In 2012 I'll rent over £50 million of cars (at RRP)!
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About Ling! My Location Dragons' Den Viz Business Ambassador Awards HAT Award NatWest BT Award Ling Speaking Live CCTV Blog LingTube Work Mantra Ling's Racing Day Education FT Bans Me My Charity Ling Image Bank Amnesty Portrait Lingux Ling Environmental Policy Ling and Seth Godin Your Link on my Website Electric Cars on Dragons Den How to Create a Googlejack! BVRLA ignore code of conduct!
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LIVE + KICKING twitter feed... WAIT!
Intro Film News Blog Office TV Contact Moan Links Play Quiz Privacy Policy Google Visitors
Herman Von Rumpy EU cookie law. Piss off Von Rumpy. Me... I hammer visitors to death with cookies, so I can find out what they want. EU Cookie Law Cookies allow my website to serve visitors the content they need. Get used to it. The EU cookie law is an ass. - Ling
Ling Valentine Quote Quote Apply for Quote DRAGONS' DEN

Richard Farleigh - "I wanted to invest; I was amazed by Ling's
complete lack of nerves, and also by her business acumen."

Duncan Bannatyne - "I wanted to
invest... but ye turrn'ed me dooon!"

Deborah Meaden
"Harrumph! I'm out!"

UK WARNING: Customers reporting many other internet prices hiding true lease costs! Beware dodgy companies selling high initial rental "6+" leases
Ling Valentine is Viz's Official Ethnic Business Ambassador Play stupid crash game! Cheap insurance Google Spider Google Spider
Food ---> 		Google Spider Food

View LIVE visitors: 7 online

 
Hi! I am Ling Cheap Car Leasing - WAH! from Dragons' Den. I lease cheap new cars!
UPDATE... The latest car I've added is a Renault Captur 0.9 TCE (90bhp) Dynamique MediaNav S Hatchback 5dr 898cc Petrol at £258.44 inc VAT at 17:50 on 17th May - Ling
Car Leasing Traffic Light
Live webcams!! LINGsCARS. Real, live, good, bad & ugly! Camera Stuff
Guy McAulay WEBCAM INTERACTION
Pressing the button will play
"The Proclaimers" in my office.
This annoys Guy, as he is Scottish.

Webcams refresh automatically every 5 seconds!
Delek WEBCAM INTERACTION
Do NOT taunt Delek!
Taunt Delek button disabled.
LING'S WEBCAM FAQ:
Ling Stomping

Are those traffic lights real?
Yes! There is another set of traffic lights, hidden to the left of the camera, too! They keep my staff awake with visual stimulation in the same way that my website invigorates my visitors!

What does the TV do?
The TV keeps everyone in my office aware of all my customers and visitors online, and tells me who is visiting my website. The TV also displays the waiting time for proposal and sales (Emma C, Wot Went Wong and me) and admin (Guy, Holly and Jon) replies. It also shows the LIVE state of my Phenom-powered webserver (based in Bytemark, Manchester), by displaying CPU, RAM and MySQL usage. This is all because my website is massive and intensive and needs keeping a beady eye on.

What about the small Jeep?
That is a zero-emission battery-powered car (just like a Nissan Leaf) that we sometimes race around the office, for prizes. That can be dangerous and violates health and safety regulations.

Not Po

What the hell is the giant fat Panda??
Don't tell Dreamworks, ssssh. They will kill me for IP infringement. That is my pet Kentucky Fried Panda. It just looks a bit like Kung Fu Panda. But isn't. I keep the pet panda to remind me of my hometown, Chengdu (in China), which is where the pandas come from. Kentucky Fried Panda handles all my customer complaints. Hence, I don't get any :)

Delek

What does Delek do?
Delek is my pet administrator. He handles automated replies and deals with awkward customers. I keep him on a very short leash and he is not allowed to use his egg-whisk. Delek types replies using his plunger, and his spelling sucks (heh). His favourite saying is: "a can of 3 in 1 a day keeps the Doctor away".

Why are you hiding on the webcam?
My monitors are big... I do get up from my seat now and again, but my desk is on a raised plinth because A) I am quite small, and B) I keep an eye on my staff from up there.

How can I interact with your staff?
I have made you a special button, which when pressed will play "The Proclaimers" in my office. This will encourage Guy to get annoyed at the webcam, because he is Scottish. Do not press the button if you're easily offended, or if children are watching! Pressing it too much spoils the fun though and he will stop responding as the noise drives him mad.

Why so many monitors?
Each operative has two 28" monitors (except Jamie who is the Mac fag), because we like things big and we like loads of screen space.

Where did you get the cerise sofas from?
Ikea.

Are the plants real?
No, they are all plastic. I am real.



Awards!

My website and business have both won many awards, from the really great to the silly...

This shows that I am real and you can trust me. I am quite proud of all of these awards, even the smallest, daftest ones mean so much to me.

Thanks!

 Winning, winning!!
NatWest EveryWoman IRIS Award


Fiona Bruce
BBC newsreader Fiona Brucie performs at the 2009 NatWest EveryWoman Awards.		 In December 2009, I went down to London to collect my NatWest EveryWoman IRIS award, presented to me by Fiona Brucie!

This award is for using IT to advance communications in the industry, I am miles ahead of those dinosaur car dealers, they still rely on phoning all customers!!

I am honoured to be compared with brilliant women in business from across the country.




SMARTA 100 Business Award
SMARTA 100 Award
SMARTA AWARD WINNER!
Ling Valentine

The Smarta 100 are the most exciting, promising, disruptive new businesses, the family businesses who remain the cornerstones of communities, the innovators ploughing their own furrows in staid or declining industries, the recession-busters making a mockery of the doom and gloom, the web wonders, the teenpreneurs, mumpreneurs, olderpreneuers and, er, just about anyone who's running a small business worth shouting about.

Smarta say: "Ling Valentine is a marketing wizard. She has one of the most visually full-on, brightly coloured, graffiti-effect-laden websites you've ever seen. Frankly, it looks like a total car crash - but that's precisely the point."




Entrepreneur of the Year



Employee nutter Lina Liang accepting my Entrepreneur award - I was in China!		 At the end of 2006, I won the North-East Entrepreneur of the Year award, for Woman in Retail.

This was mired by controversy as the racist organisers airbrushed my chinese employee Lina out of the winners' photo. Terrible!!!! Sometimes, these organisations stink! I had to make a call to the chief exec of One North East (the sponsors) to get Lina's photo reinstated!

Previously, Dragon Den's grump Duncan Bannatyne has won the equivalent men's award!
...see the racist airbrushing!




Environmental Award




MEP Martin Callanan said some very nice things about my award!		 In 2008, I won the UK Motor Industry "Best Non-Franchised Environmentalist" award, from Automotive Management.

I am very proud of this award, as the environment should be on the top of every business agenda.

MEP Martin Callanan said some very nice things about me! "Ling and her unique website LINGsCARS.com displays environmental information in a way that leads the UK motor industry. Following my discussions with her about greening the business, Ling has grasped the environmental nettle and is giving UK car buyers comprehensive environmental data on all new cars for sale in the UK to enable them to make an informed choice. LINGsCARS gives a fantastic amount of green information on her new cars, which the rest of the UK motor industry would do well to emulate. Using the internet is already the most energy efficient way of researching and buying a new car, so well done Ling for taking the personal responsibility to push this carbon data to the top of her agenda and to push environmental awareness a big step further"
...visit my Enviro-Policy page




Best Motor Industry Website



Held in massive hall in Birmingham!		 In 2007, I won the UK Motor Industry "Best Non-Franchised Website" award, from Automotive Management.

I work so hard on my website, and to be singled out as the BEST unfranchised website in the whole UK car industry means a lot to me.

I was up against some massive competition. Perrys group won the Franchised award. Considering they had spent Ā£100k+ on their website, for my hand-made LINGsCARS.com to beat everyone else made me very proud!




Best TV ad campaign

Fresh Awards give me first place!!!		 In 2008, I won FIRST PLACE the FRESH AWARDS which recognise outstanding creativity and innovation outside the M25 in Creative, TV, Digital, Media and PR.

LINGsCARS.com "ImproPlug" is the winner of the 2008 TV Advertising Campaign category for outstanding innovation, originality and execution.

One of the ads was so good it got banned!
...see my TV ads and films!




FHM 100 Greatest Websites

FHM choose LINGsCARS!!		 FHM magazine, the lads mag, have chosen LINGsCARS as one of their 100 Greatest Websites.

They say: "We said au revoir to Amazon, ejected eBay and renounced Napster as our experts hand-picked these hidden gems of the web just for you..."

About LINGsCARS, FHM say: "Fortune cookie philosophies and a feature equating your daily lease payment to the price of fags. Oh, and a free chow mein for ten readers a day." Of the estimated 80 million websites on the internet, 79,999,900 didn't make it onto this list.

It is great to be chosen above Amazon and eBay, so thanks to all the visitors who voted for me!




Top 10 Worst in the World!

Now I am in the bottom 10!		 BLOGSTORM say: "If your website is on this list please don't be offended, although you may wish to consider a redesign.".

They go on (and on, hahaha): "Ling's Cars was featured recently on the BBC's Dragons Den program and really tries hard to provide a personal touch to her car leasing website. Unfortunately this means ignoring a few of the user friendly features on more conventional sites. Just try navigating round a few pages and you will see that the mass of information at the top isn't just on the homepage, its on all the pages."

Hey! That's changed, just in case you hadn't noticed, BLOGSTORM. I understand this list was tongue in cheek, but really, you should see some of the other, really boring car leasing websites out there!




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