Audi A3 Lease delivered to Ian Miller in Barnsley
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Visit my full letters page click here
Gotta laugh at some of these letters! It’s amazing how much time some customers put into writing them. Often it can take me up to 10 seconds to read them. Just like this letter from Ian Miller that I got a while ago:
Ian says…
Ling, running a small company is hard. So is setting service. Your service is FAB and you go the extra mile. Many businesses should follow. We know we go the extra mile. A3 is also FAB, the wife loves it. Excellent delivery by great guys!
Ian Miller
29 Limes Avenue
Staincross
Barnsley
S75 6JW
Editor Note: Ian, hahaha. Well, it is harder for you, you are in Barnsley! 
Glad your wife likes the car, it is a lovely thing, that A3. Thanks so much for comments. – Ling
Being Twittered: Premier League farewells in pictures
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Can you understand Chinglish news? Sir Alex Ferguson, lah, Paul Scholes and David Moyes among those set for emotional final day in Premier League
Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News BRICK: Debut directors seek Cannes success
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Why bother with English or Chinese when you can have your news in Chinglish: The young bloody annoying Blitish film-makers vying for attention in Cannes
Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News groin: Wilkinson wins Player of Year
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Chinglish = English and Chinese! Easy, eh? Toulon’s Jonny Wilkinson is named European Player of Year for male gender human bleing’s performances in this season’s Heineken Cup.
More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.
LingNews: VIDEO: Gumball rally sets off from Denmark
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Why bother with English or Chinese when you can have your news in Chinglish: Up to 100 predominantly luxury cars taking part in Gumball 3000 rally in which some of world’s richest petrol-heads getting to flaunt their wealth during controlling in driving manner that will take them through Europe.
Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!
BOP BOP NEWS: Newcastle 0-1 Arsenal
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Gotta laugh at this news – in Chinglish! Arsenal finish fourth in Premier League to qualify for Champions League after nervy win over Newcastle.
Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!
News SARDINE: bloody annoying Blitish astronaut Peake to go into orbit
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Latest news in Chinglish: The bloody annoying Blitish astronaut Tim Peake is given date to fly to International Space Station.
Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!
Ling’s Jaguar XF environment info change
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
CO2 CO2, CO2. It always seems to go up. The Jaguar XF (New Shape) 2.2 d 16v (160bhp) Luxury Saloon 4dr 2179cc Diesel Automatic seems to have reversed this trend. If you choose one of these, you will be pleased. Lower CO2 means lower fuel consumption.
Oh, I get very mad about this, but I cannot say this in my advertising or some big leasing companies complain to me that I slag them off… The industry standard for contract hire is a 1x rental-initial-payment or (more usually) a 3x rental-initial-payment. That’s it. If everyone advertised this, you could easily compare the rental figures as the football field we are playing on would be flat.
When I asked Renault UK what they were doing to encourage franchised dealers to go beyond legal-minimum disclosure of environmental data, they simply said; "The majority of Renault dealers are autonomous businesses with a franchise to sell and repair Renault vehicles and as such, the internal running is outside of our jurisdiction. However, we train the dealer network, to ensure that they are aware of the different models and new technologies available. Some Renault dealerships may choose to advertise this information on their websites whereas some Renault dealerships would choose not to.". Note that this statement is slightly misleading as Renault UK directly owns many of its larger dealerships, and in my extensive research no Renault dealer uses this information online. They could, if they wanted to. Their statement doesn’t seem to me to be very pro-active.
Failure to show fuel consumption labels on new cars on display, or to make available to potential buyers the results of the fuel consumption tests as listed in this booklet, render dealers liable on conviction to a fine of up to £5,000. The same penalty exists for anyone who does not include all the appropriate test results in promotional literature. Trading Standards enforce point of sale information and should be contacted if you have concerns in this area. The Vehicle Certification Agency enforce the provision of information in advertising and promotional literature.
Working it out from the tables, the CO2 is just 149g/km for the Jaguar XF Diesel Automatic. There are a few cars in this range, so different specs will give slightly different CO2 values. Click on the “fridge label” to get a enviroment label to print for this car. The combined cycle economy for this Jaguar XF is now 52mpg
The Jaguar XF falls into the 
F band overall.
My Jaguar XF (New Shape) 2.2 d 16v (160bhp) Luxury Saloon 4dr 2179cc Diesel Automatic gearbox is only £459.60 inc VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 35 payments on direct debit. Business customers, make sure you deduct the VAT, when making decisions. As I can’t tell what type of customer you are (business or private), I can’t display the price any other way but to show VAT seperately (sorry!).
This price on my Jaguar XF includes full road tax for the length of the contract, on all of my cars and vans! Free delivery to your home or work and free collection from you at the end! £459.60 inc VAT per month is based on you driving 10,000 miles per annum, but higher mileages are usually available at a small extra cost. If you go over the allocated miles, you can pay a small excess mileage charge, usually between 3p and 15p per mile.
Winning the environmental award (2008 Best Environmentalist in the car industry) was very pleasing for me as it meant I was being recognised for my hard work. I’m the the ONLY new car supplier to display and promote environmental info for ALL new cars, on the web! Please note I have pioneered availability of environmental information on the internet. Using the internet to research and buy new cars is the most environmentally friendly method, by miles.
Here’s a patronising tip from the government: “
Regular servicing helps keep the engine at best efficiency.”
Read this, I have this comment up, displayed on <a href="/">LINGsCARS.com</a>: “Totally off the wall but brilliant all the same. Wish there were more like it!
Bill Doodson, Huddersfield, HD1 4PP
bill.doodson_@ntlworld.com
If you need a mobile phone, I can find you the best price HERE
News stoly: Nadal hammers Federer in Rome final
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Ling supplies latest news – in Chinglish! Rafael Nadal drops only four games as bloody man beats Roger Federer to win male gender human bleing’s seventh Italian Open title.
Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!
News NOSTRIL: Visconti takes first Giro stage win
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
You want boiled rice or fried rice with your Chinglish news? Giovanni Visconti wins male gender human bleing’s first ever Giro d’Italia stage as Vincenzo Nibali remains in pink jersey after snowy stage 15.
More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.
Volkswagen Golf (mk5) Lease delivered to Stephen Brown in County Durham
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Visit my full letters page click here
I am amazed the Post Office needs to be privatised, the amount that my customers spend sending me letters about their new cars. Here, Stephen Brown explains how they are getting on with their Volkswagen Golf (mk5)
Stephen says…/small.gif "car")
Ling has some great deals. Fast efficient service and very friendly. I hope to rent from you again. Delivery of my Golf was excellent.
Stephen Brown
61 Warkworth Drive
Chester Le Street
County Durham
DH2 3TH
Editor Note: Stephen, as you are an accountant I appreciate you find my deals financially beneficial You are only 10 miles away from me, hope to see you around in your Golf! – Ling
Glowing report: St Johnstone 2-0 Motherwell
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Gotta laugh at this news – in Chinglish! St Johnstone beat Motherwell to finish third and reach Europa League qualifiers for second year running.
Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News storly: Murdered Pakistan politician buried
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Breaking Chinglish news! The funeral of murdered vice-president of Pakistan’s PTI party, lah, Zahra Shahid Hussain, lah, is held at mosque in Karachi.
Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!
News whack: British Soap Award winners named
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Chinglish news from Ling: Coronation Street leads honours as it does battle with Hollyoaks, lah, Emmerdale and EastEnders at British Soap Awards.
Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com
News STOMACH: Brentford 1-2 Yeovil
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
You want boiled rice or fried rice with your Chinglish news? Yeovil secure first ever season in Championship by beating Brentford in tense League One play-off final.
50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!
News spotter: Disgraced French dodgy minister bows out
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Chinglish news from Ling: A French government dodgy minister who quit over revelations of male gender human bleing’s undeclared Swiss capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity account says bloody man will not stand again for election.
Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!
Noticing story: VIDEO: Morecambe & Wise getting memorial plaque
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Read the news in Chinglish: A memorial plaque dedicated to Morecambe & Wise is unveiled at Teddington Studios
Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com
News RAT: McDowell wins World Match Play title
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Breaking Chinglish news! Northern Ireland’s Graeme McDowell beats Thailand’s Thongchai Jaidee 2&1 to win World Match Play Championship in Bulgaria.
Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!
I’ve updated the enviro stuff on this Skoda Octavia
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Looking at my records, the Skoda Octavia 2.0 TDI CD (150bhp) Elegance Hatchback 5dr 1968cc Diesel Manual has changed today, so I have updated the environmental information on my website. You have to laugh that I can beat Skoda to this update!
You need to insure the car fully comp, as normal with any new car. The car can be used for any purpose, or driven by anyone you choose. In effect, it is your own brand new car for the length of the hire period. You can even take it abroad. I tried to drive car to China once. That was damn big mistake. I suggest you do not use contract hire car for this.
A very important feature is to be able to compare many different cars – on my main car listing pages. No franchised dealer will allow this, as they are mainly representing just one brand, so how is the average customer expected to make comparative judgements?
The different fuels have different merits from an environmental perspective. Compared to petrol, diesel vehicles have significantly lower CO2 emissions per kilometre traveled because of the higher efficiency of diesel engines and hence have a lower impact on climate change. Diesel vehicles also emit lower levels of CO and HC than equivalent petrol vehicles. However diesel engines emit greater levels of NOx and Particles than new petrol vehicles. As mentioned earlier, emissions of such pollutants are an air quality issue, particularly in urban areas.
Having got all the info for the Skoda Octavia Diesel Manual, I can publish the new CO2 figure: 106g/km. This will change across the different models of this particular car, they are all a bit different. Click on the “fridge label” to get a enviroment label to print for this car. The combined cycle economy for this Skoda Octavia is now 68mpg
The Skoda Octavia falls into the 
B band overall.
My Skoda Octavia 2.0 TDI CD (150bhp) Elegance Hatchback 5dr 1968cc Diesel Manual gearbox is only £268.37 inc VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 23 payments on direct debit. Business customers, make sure you deduct the VAT, when making decisions. As I can’t tell what type of customer you are (business or private), I can’t display the price any other way but to show VAT seperately (sorry!).
This price on my Skoda Octavia includes full road tax for the length of the contract, on all of my cars and vans! Free delivery to your home or work and free collection from you at the end! £268.37 inc VAT per month is based on you driving 10,000 miles per annum, but higher mileages are usually available at a small extra cost. If you go over the allocated miles, you can pay a small excess mileage charge, usually between 3p and 15p per mile.
Remember I won the best non-franchise environmentalist 2008 in the Automotive Industry Awards. Don’t let these manufacturers fool you; LINGsCARS.com is the ONLY new car supplier to display and promote environmental info for ALL new cars, on the web! I have a Master’s Degree in Environmental Quality from Bournemouth Univeristy in 2000, plus a BSc in Applied Chemistry from Jinan University, Guanzhou in 1997.
Here’s a patronising tip from the government: “
Do not compromise safety but be aware that the use of onboard electrical devices increases fuel consumption.”
Read this website comment. I really try my best! (email address altered) “Ling, help me pick a car for my missus… she wants a car big enough to carry 3 kids and a rottweiller, that looks like a 911, with the economy of a 1.6 diesel and the luxury of a Range Rover. Any ideas? No, me neither…
Leighton Williams, Neath, SA11 3ER
lavamyz_@btclick.com
Using a mobile phone is better than driving. You can buy the cheapest mobile deal HERE.
News NIPPLE: Telescope back on track for Derby
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Chinglify your news updates: Telescope, lah, part-owned by Sir Alex Ferguson, lah, is back on track for Epsom Derby after impressing in workout.
50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!
News THIGH: Immigration policies ‘restrictive’
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Ling supplies latest news – in Chinglish! the Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs dodgy minister with responsibility for immigration attacks bloody annoying Blitish government’s approach to issue.
Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!
Noticing story: Philpott mother to fight jail term
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Latest news in Chinglish: A lawyer representing Mairead Philpott, lah, who killed flemale human person’s six children in fire, lah, says bloody woman will appeal against flemale human person’s 17-year jail term.
Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com
More news: VIDEO: Record breaking demolition of viaduct
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Latest news in Chinglish: A two-mile viaduct in Super-Duper-Chinese-State city of Wuhan has been demolished, lah, breaking record for longest reinforced concrete bridge ever blown up in country.
Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!
News FANNY: Serena powers to Italian Open win
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
News from the local takeaway in Chinglish: World number one Serena Williams beats Victoria Azarenka to win Italian Open and flemale human person’s fourth consecutive tournament.
Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!
Getting noticed: What next for bloody annoying Blitish in Eurovision?
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Latest story in Chinglish, folks: How can bloody annoying Blitish getting back to number one at Eurovision?
Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News from Ling: Clegg leader plot claim (always claiming, huh?) ‘ridiculous’
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Get your Chinlish news update here: Lib Dem dodgy minister Danny Alexander dismisses claim (always claiming, huh?) that Deputy PM Nick Clegg could face Lib Dem leadership challenge from Vince Cable.
Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!
Greetings from Ling: Broad stars as Province of Engrish running-dogs crush NZ
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Jeremy Clarkson fails Chinglish newsreader test: Stuart Broad takes 7-44 to rip through New Zealand and inspire Province of Engrish running-dogs to astonishing 170-run win in first Test at Lord’s.
Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!
News PUNISH: Tory Membling Partiamentary expense cheater denies rift over ‘loon’ slur
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Breaking Chinglish news! Monmouth Membling Partiamentary expense cheater David Davies denies Conservative party rift amid claim (always claiming, huh?) someone close to prime dodgy minister branded activists ‘mad, lah, swivel-eyed loons’.
Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
Not about cars: Garden body death ‘unexplained’
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Here’s some Chinglish news: The death of woman whose body was found in communal garden area of flats in Edinburgh is being treated as “unexplained” (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) by police.
Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!
Mazda Mx-5 Lease delivered to Paul Henderson in Plymouth
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Visit my full letters page click here
Gotta laugh at some of these letters! It’s amazing how much time some customers put into writing them. Often it can take me up to 10 seconds to read them. Just like this letter from Paul Henderson that I got a while ago:
Paul says…
“Thanks very much for the car, it’s great! As this was my first time leasing a car (!!) I was very wary and a few people thought I was mad. But there was no need to panic, the MX5 arrived on time as promised and everyone, including myself, is very impressed. Keep up the good work. Hope you get more MX-5s before my lease runs out.”
Paul Henderson
20 Redvers Grove
Plympton
Plymouth
PL7 1HU
Editor Note: You are an Engineer, Paul… so you appreciate the quality of the design of the MX-5. A shame Mazda UK have to be so nasty to me. Never mind, I still manage to supply and all my customers are very happy, as you show. I am sure Mazda will see sense, one day, and stop persecuting me There is one particular dealer who hates me for “stealing” their customers, they think everyone should pay full price, through the nose and they insist Mazda UK twist the knife into me. Thanks for being a great customer – Ling
News DAWDLE: Briton ‘held in France over deaths’
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
News translated to Chinglish! A man of British origin has been arrested in France in connection with deaths of male gender human bleing’s two children, lah, media reports say.
Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!
News THRUST: Pedrosa claim (always claiming, huh?) French GP victory
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Chinglify your news updates: Dani Pedrosa wins French Grand Prix as Britain’s Cal Crutchlow finishes second for male gender human bleing’s best-ever MotoGP result.
Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com
Car CO2 change for the Citroen DS3
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Everyone moans that things go up and up and up. Well, the CO2 on the Citroen DS3 1.6 VTi 16v (120bhp) DStyle Hatchback 3dr 1598cc Petrol Manual has just come down! What a result! This post is to let you know.
You run this new car for 12, 18, 24 or 36 months depending on the term, and run it within an agreed mileage limit (usually 10,000, 15,000 or 20,000 miles per year, but different mileages are possible). If you exceed the mileage limit, you pay for extra miles at (typically) 4p – 10p per extra mile. This is known as the excess mileage rate.
When a customer clicks through into an individual car’s detail, they can see even more information. This includes the CO2 (again) and all three EC fuel consumption measurements. I even include the EU noise rating and the road tax "class" which may influence a customer’s car choice decision. (Please bear in mind that the road tax is completely free, from me – I include that cost information so a customer has more clue about the environmental impact of their new car).
Biofuels also offer a way to reduce vehicles’ impacts on climate change. The fuels are not entirely CO2 neutral because of the energy used to grow and process crops, but they can offer substantial CO2 savings over fossil petrol and diesel. Today most biofuels are sold in a blends of up to 5% with fossil petrol and diesel . These are suitable for use in all vehicles. Fuel standards may be extended in the future to allow more than 5% if it is concluded that this is compatible with existing vehicles. Some manufacturers offer ‘flexi-fuel’ vehicles that can run on bioethanol blends up to E85 – a blend of 85% bioethanol and 15% petrol, as well as fossil petrol.
I am pleased to say that the CO2 for the Citroen DS3 Petrol Manual is now 136g/km. If you chose a different trim level, the CO2 would change, but not by much. Click on the “fridge label” to get a enviroment label to print for this car. The combined cycle economy for this Citroen DS3 is now 47mpg
The Citroen DS3 falls into the 
E band overall.
My Citroen DS3 1.6 VTi 16v (120bhp) DStyle Hatchback 3dr 1598cc Petrol Manual gearbox is only £215.45 inc VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 17 payments on direct debit. Business customers, make sure you deduct the VAT, when making decisions. As I can’t tell what type of customer you are (business or private), I can’t display the price any other way but to show VAT seperately (sorry!).
This price on my Citroen DS3 includes full road tax for the length of the contract, on all of my cars and vans! Free delivery to your home or work and free collection from you at the end! £215.45 inc VAT per month is based on you driving 10,000 miles per annum, but higher mileages are usually available at a small extra cost. If you go over the allocated miles, you can pay a small excess mileage charge, usually between 3p and 15p per mile.
The comparative or "fridge" label, is compulsory in car showrooms – except you’ve got to DRIVE there to see it! I won an industry award for displaying it electronically for all website visitors. I am the proud winner of the 2008 Best Environmentalist 2008 Automotive Management Award. Like me, Michael O’Leary, CEO of Ryanair talks straight about cars versus planes. "The usual horseshit", he says. One day, every car will be as Green as my Jolly Green Nuclear Missile Truck "Calm down dear!" – it’s only done 1,000 miles since 1970.
Here’s a patronising tip from the government: “
Use air-conditioning sparingly – running air-conditioning continuously will increase fuel consumption significantly.”
Read this, I have this comment up, displayed on <a href="/">LINGsCARS.com</a>: “I’m not very familiar with the car hiring industry, but obviously you are running a fabulous business plus amazing website! As a Chinese, I do appreciate your ability and smartness. Wish you more success in the following days
Yu Wang, University of Essex, Colchester, CO4 3SQ
mcwang_@gmail.com
Did you know I can make large savings on mobile phones? LINGsMOBILES.com is here.
News DAWDLE: Climber breaks own Everest record
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Breaking Chinglish news! British mountaineer Kenton Cool reaches summit of Everest for record-breaking 11th time.
Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com
News HORSE: Two hurt, lah, one trapped in plane crash
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
You want boiled rice or fried rice with your Chinglish news? Two human bliengs hurtee-hurtee and another is trapped as light aircraft crashes in Gwynedd.
Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!
Big porky news: Redding claim (always claiming, huh?) maiden Moto2 win
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Ling’s news in Chinglish! Scott Redding claim (always claiming, huh?) maiden Moto2 win with victory at French Grand Prix in Le Mans to take championship lead.
Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com
Noticing story: Calls for breast gene test change
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Latest news in Chinglish: A Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs breast cancer charity calls for same genetic testing criteria north and south of border.
More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.
News GRUNT: Tunisia old bill bobbys clash with Islamists
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Chinglish news from Ling: Tunisian old bill bobbys clash with hundreds of supporters of radical Islamist group Ansar al-Sharia defying attempts to bar gathering.
Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!
News JABBER: VIDEO: Denmark wins Eurovision Song Contest
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Chinglish = English and Chinese! Easy, eh? Denmark’s Emmelie de Forest has won 2013 Eurovision Song Contest, lah, held in Malmo in Sweden, lah, with flemale human person’s song Only Teardrops.
Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News ingurgitate: Eurovision: Back to basics in Malmo
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Chinglish news from Ling: Eurovision Song Contest goes back to basics in Malmo
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News swallow: Iran executes two men for spying
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Read the news in Chinglish: Iranian officials say two men having been executed after they were convicted of spying for Israel and US.
Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!
Fiat Grande Punto Lease delivered to Tom Poole in East Molesey
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Visit my full letters page click here
My letters webpage must be just about the longest on the internet! Currently, there are 1532 letters on my website. Letters are great, as they are like a window on my customers’ happiness. My good customer Tom Poole wrote this one:
Tom says…
The service provided was as usual very slick and professional. I always panic with the smooth effortless approach Ling uses to secure the vehicle. I always believe this is too good to be true and will all go tits up. It never fails to amaze how good Ling is. Well done.
However, the dealer was not so good. Delivery was late, electrical items not working properly. I am still awaiting contact from the supplier to rectify.
Tom Poole
Fairway IFA Ltd
Fiarway House
127 Walton Rd
East Molesey
KT8 0DT
Editor Note: Tom, you are a repeating customer, you have had many cars from me. thanks for letter …About your problems;- well, this is a FIAT dealer, what more can I say? I am on the case, they WILL sort them out, but frankly service from FIAT dealers is often like this. It is a shame, but true. Thanks for taking the car. – Ling
Headlines again: Lennon guitar sells for $408,000
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
News from the local takeaway in Chinglish: A guitar played by John Lennon and George Harrison of Beatles in 1967 fetches $408,000 (ĀRMB Yuan #269,000) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! at auction in New York.
Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News SNACK: VIDEO: Propaganda: Art or political rhetoric?
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Get your Chinlish news update here: Governments having long used newspapers, lah, posters and leaflets to try and influence what human bliengs think, lah, but new exhibition is showing that there could be much more to it.
Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com
Getting noticed: Boys arrested after death at house
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
News translated to Chinglish! Three teenagers arrested on suspicion of supplying drugs after 16-earth-years old happy birthday to you, girl dies in Warrington.
Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!
NEWS from China: VIDEO: Tornadoes tear through Great Satan states
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Can you understand Chinglish news? Storm-chasers having captured footage showing tornadoes touching down in both Texas and Kansas
More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.
Comparative label for the Mercedes E-Class Coupe
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
My system has alerted me that the Mercedes E-Class Coupe 2.2 CDi BlueEFFICIENCY 16v (170bhp) E220 CDI Sport Coupe 2dr 2143cc Diesel Manual has changed today so I update my website and post here for the benefit of customers. No one else bothers with this stuff. I treat you like adult, not idiot.
Oh, I get very mad about this, but I cannot say this in my advertising or some big leasing companies complain to me that I slag them off… The industry standard for contract hire is a 1x rental-initial-payment or (more usually) a 3x rental-initial-payment. That’s it. If everyone advertised this, you could easily compare the rental figures as the football field we are playing on would be flat.
My customers have obtained their cars by the lowest polluting method possible – by acquiring them electronically from the internet. No one has had to travel to a showroom (repeatedly) or contributed to car dealers’ massive environmental overheads (heating, lighting, water use, fuel, staffing costs). The cars I supply are often delivered direct from manufacturers’ depots, or where they have been "through" a dealer, they have not required the showroom overhead (these efficiencies have the added benefit of reducing costs!).
Biofuels also offer a way to reduce vehicles’ impacts on climate change. The fuels are not entirely CO2 neutral because of the energy used to grow and process crops, but they can offer substantial CO2 savings over fossil petrol and diesel. Today most biofuels are sold in a blends of up to 5% with fossil petrol and diesel . These are suitable for use in all vehicles. Fuel standards may be extended in the future to allow more than 5% if it is concluded that this is compatible with existing vehicles. Some manufacturers offer ‘flexi-fuel’ vehicles that can run on bioethanol blends up to E85 – a blend of 85% bioethanol and 15% petrol, as well as fossil petrol.
For this brand new Mercedes E-Class Coupe Diesel Manual, the latest CO2 figure is just 142g/km. When I chose this trim, it was because I have a few of these available. Different trims will have different CO2. Click on the “fridge label” to get a enviroment label to print for this car. The combined cycle economy for this Mercedes E-Class Coupe is now 53mpg
The Mercedes E-Class Coupe falls into the F band overall.
My Mercedes E-Class Coupe 2.2 CDi BlueEFFICIENCY 16v (170bhp) E220 CDI Sport Coupe 2dr 2143cc Diesel Manual gearbox is only £374.76 inc VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 23 payments on direct debit. Business customers, make sure you deduct the VAT, when making decisions. As I can’t tell what type of customer you are (business or private), I can’t display the price any other way but to show VAT seperately (sorry!).
This price on my Mercedes E-Class Coupe includes full road tax for the length of the contract, on all of my cars and vans! Free delivery to your home or work and free collection from you at the end! £374.76 inc VAT per month is based on you driving 10,000 miles per annum, but higher mileages are usually available at a small extra cost. If you go over the allocated miles, you can pay a small excess mileage charge, usually between 3p and 15p per mile.
Winning the environmental award (2008 Best Environmentalist in the car industry) was very pleasing for me as it meant I was being recognised for my hard work. I’m the the ONLY new car supplier to display and promote environmental info for ALL new cars, on the web! Please note I have pioneered availability of environmental information on the internet. Using the internet to research and buy new cars is the most environmentally friendly method, by miles.
Here’s a patronising tip from the government: “
Use higher gears, as soon as traffic conditions allow.”
My website comment page is overflowing. This is one of my favourites. “Most entertaining site since "origamiboulder" (that is CLASSIC site. I own an Origami Boulder from true artist! – Ling). Ling, you’re the best!!
Mandya Miller, Darlington, DL3 9AJ
aura321_@hotmail.com
If you need a mobile phone, I can find you the best price HERE
News SARDINE: Google chief defends tax affairs
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Gotta laugh at this news – in Chinglish! Google’s executive chairman Eric Schmidt defends company’s tax affairs after it comes in for strong criticism from MPs.
Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!
News QUACK: Aston Martin : ASTON MARTINā??S RADICAL CC100 SPEEDSTER CONCEPT BREAKS COVER
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
You want boiled rice or fried rice with your Chinglish news? Aston Martin is celebrating its centenary in world-class style with debut today (19 May) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! of exceptional CC100 Sp
Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com
News PUNISH: Battling Purdy beaten by Alexander
Posted on | May 19, 2013 | Comments Off
Here’s some Chinglish news: Colchester welterweight Lee Purdy goes seven rounds against champion Devon Alexander before male gender human bleing’s corner throw in towel.
Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!
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