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Hi! I am Ling Cheap Car Leasing - WAH! from Dragons' Den. I lease cheap new cars!
UPDATE... The latest car I've added is a Citroen C4 Grand Picasso 1.6 e-HDi Airdream 16v (90bhp) VTR ETG6 MPV (7-seat) 5dr 1560cc Diesel at £211.06 inc VAT at 10:04 on 25th Sep - Ling
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CUSTOMER LETTERS

Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
1528 LETTERS!
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling


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Search my letters page!
From your area... ...or from people... ...or about a specific car!

Showing Letters from Birmingham
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Letter
Customer Letter: 1472 / 1528
Lisa says...
NISSAN QASHQAIExcellent service, communication was outstanding always knew exact status of delivery process. Excellent delivery of my new Qashqai.

Lisa Button
1 Sant Rd
West Heath
Birmingham
B31 3NJ


Editor Note: Hey, hey, and you are an accountant, Lisa. That means you will take time to find the very best financial option for your car. So, I am so pleased you chose me :) Thanks for being a great customer and enjoy that bloody Qashqai :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1450 / 1528
Lee says...
VOLKSWAGEN SCIROCCOExcellent service from Ling and her team. There is no lease company out there that has got their business right like Ling. I recommend anyone after a lease this is the place to contact. Thanks very much I'll be back soon. Excellent delivery - on time. Service was good. I have no complaints about the whole process.

Lee James
868 Coventry Rd
Small Heath
Birmingham
B10 0TZ


Editor Note: Sciroccos are great cars! So happy you had excellent service. As you are in the car trade, I appreciate your business and that you find my prices the cheapest. Enjoy the sporty VW! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1367 / 1528
Jacqueline says...
 I would like to thank you for a stress free time organising a new lease car. Your website is a bit mad! But your LINGO message system is excellent and you respond very quickly to every message. You also don't charge a fee (unlike the previous company I used) - How do you do it? Delivery was when they said, but the expected date was nearly a month earlier.

Jacqueline Lee
24 Whitehill Lane
Selly Oak
Birmingham
B29 4QF


Editor Note: Very easily! Those fees are a complete rip-off and the companies who charge them are just raking in extra profit at the customer's expense. You have a lovely new Mini Cooper. The delivery was affected by the factory shutdown at Mini, due to the credit crunch - BMW chose to save money by suspending production. Not a lot I could do about that, sorry. If they don't build them, I can't deliver them. Dealer was just as frustrated as you and me. However, you have your car at last and it's fantastic. I really like those fast Minis. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1354 / 1528
Tracy says...
CITROEN C-CROSSERVery efficient and helpful service. Keeps you informed every step of the way and very funny. Would recommend LINGsCARS to others. Helpful and professional delivery of my new C-Crosser.

Tracy Cawley
Address Withheld
Birmingham
B29 ***


Editor Note: Another C-Crosser! It's great to have so many good reports about this Citroen dealer, they are very efficient. As you are a Chiropodist, Tracy, I am sure to recommend you to any visitors with foot-problem... my only foot-problem is putting it in my mouth when I talk to customers, hahaha! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1271 / 1528
David says...
FORD FIESTAAlthough I could have got a car for a few pounds less (really??? Never! - Ling), Ling was much more helpful and has an interesting website. Also, i had a problem with my emails, but I was able to use Ling's secure "LINGO" system with no problem. Everything was made very easy, I know exactly what was going on. My new Fiesta arrived when Ling said it would. VERY PLEASED. Delivery had 46 miles on the clock. Good.

David Jones
45 Ashgrove Close
Marlbrook
Bromsgrove
B60 1HW


Editor Note: David, when you compare prices, remember that many companies have hidden fees and "document" charges. I avoid these whenever possible. So, the screen price on competitor sites does not always reflect what you will pay. In fact, most competitor car leasing websites are illegal in the way they represent VAT. However, you sound really pleased to choose me and I say THANKS to you for being a star customer. So pleased you like the LINGO system. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1198 / 1528
Neil says...
 Ling,

I really have to say how good the service that you provide is. The attention to detail, the prompt replies to questions and delivering exactly what you said, when you said made getting my car painless. Thank you very much, I will definitely be using your company again!

Delivery of the Vauxhall Astra to where I was working instead of home meant I got my car quicker as I was working in Bolton but live in Birmingham. Excellent.

Neil T
Address Withheld
Birmingham
B13 ***


Editor Note: I like "excellent", that is a great word. I am happy to deliver to work addresses as long as we have all home address proofs in place, for security. You were very lovely to deal with. Neil, as a software engineer, I am glad you like my software systems :) I still cannot pronounce your surname. And people say Chinese is a difficult language, hahaha. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1185 / 1528
Kevin says...
LEXUS ISThe Lexus IS was a great suggestion - thanks Ling. I like the new web portal, LINGO, it allows fast and easy information exchange and speeds up the whole process. Your service is still out in front. I will be back for my next car again in 2 years. Oh and the price - No one else even came near to it. Fantastic! All the best to you and your team for 2009! Delivery was very considerate and thorough.

Kevin Corry
Address withheld
Alcester
B49 ***


Editor Note: Great! You previously had a BMW 5-Series, so it's great to have a returning customer! You are also a company director so I take your comments very seriously. Thanks so much, Kevin, and I'm glad you like my new LINGO, it is a big improvement on email, eh? See you in 24-months! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 993 / 1528
Alan says...
CarCarExcellent service and communication supplying our two new Toyota Priuses. Provided with good honest advice - will certainly continue to use Ling Cars in the future. Good delivery, on time.

Alan Sadler
Fabstore Ltd
Unit 11, Tamebridge Industrial Estate
Perry Barr
Birmingham
B42 2TX


Editor Note: Alan, wow, now you are saving TWO planets :) I give you a hyperlink for lovely letter. thanks for being such a nice customer. You are repeating customer, so I am so happy to see you back. See you in 3-years. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 984 / 1528
Mick says...
CarLing -

Very good service, will shop with you again. Excellent delivery service.


Mick O'Reilly
8 Bissel Close
Hall Green
Birmingham
B28 0XX


Editor Note: Wow, these VW Eos are not very well-known cars, and not the cheapest, but they are very popular. A lovely convertible car :) I hope you get lots of sun in Birmingham, Mick. Thanks for short letter! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 964 / 1528
Linda says...
CarHi Ling

I am a big believer in good service, and that is what I feel I have received from yourself. The Chevvy Captiva is our first brand-new car and still has that "new" smell. We will be in touch in 18 months! Good delivery, not a lot of involvement needed, straight from the docks.

Linda Platt
PJ Research
27 Amberley Way
Sutton Coldfield
B74 3RN


Editor Note: Great to hear you got a fresh car, Linda! I'm so glad you thought I gave good service, that makes me VERY happy. Keep sniffing the car, it is like a drug. Speak soon! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 928 / 1528
Richard says...
CarThank you Ling, what you see is what you pay, and no hidden charges!!! No other company sends you sweets, and I will use Ling again. The Astra was a few days later than I hoped, but no problems. The delivery was excellent. The car had 75 miles on the clock, but all Ok and a nice driver.

Richard Moore
6 Parkfield Close
Tamworth
B77 1HE


Editor Note: Richard, you are so sweet. I am pleased you appreciated my poison sweets, many people say they make them ill :) You got a great 150bhp Astra (most popular car in the UK) so cheap, see you in 2-years! The 75 miles will be added to the contract mileage. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 897 / 1528
Justin says...
CarLing delivers on all of her many promises that she makes on her website. Always helpful and available and I wouldn't hesitate to recommend her to anyone. My Freelander arrived exactly on time as promised.

Justin Luckman
65 Hill Village Road
Four Oaks
Sutton Coldfield
B75 5BH


Editor Note: Just-in time for the Easter snow, Justin, hahahaha! Sorry, that was a very bad joke! As I type this, everything is white, and I am thinking of you driving your new 4x4. What a shame I didn't promise snow! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 817 / 1528
Peter says...
CarExcellent service, car in excellent condition with low delivery mileage. The Nissan Navara is a cracking car. I will definitely contact Ling for a new vehicle when the contract expires. My friends are now looking to use Ling, too. Thanks, Ling!

Peter Dea
20 Barrs Road
Sandwell
B64 7HG


Editor Note: Peter, well, not sure if the Navara qualifies as a "car" but what the hell, as long as you love it. As you are an NVQ assessor, I hope you give me top marks :) See you in two years, and I hope you have LOADS of friends, hehehe. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 748 / 1528
Mark says...
CarAfter searching the Internet for leasing a car at the right price with no hidden extras, we were lucky enough to find LINGsCARS! From start to finish Ling was superb in providing a top class service!

We would definitely recommend LINGsCARS and re-use her in the future, without having to look elsewhere! No bullshit now... but if you want a service from a provider where you literally have to do nothing... Ling is your woman! The Citroen C2 Code arrived on time and was fully explained to me in detail. Oh - Ling also sends nice sweets out in the post, too!

Mark Villers
am2pm Mortgages
49 Fowler Road
Sutton Coldfield
B75 7LN


Editor Note: Mark, well, I must have made a mistake and sent you the wrong sweets, most people say they are terrible and that I am poisoning customers :) The C2 Code is a fantastic, fast, fully equipped car, with aircon, leather and everything. Enjoy! Thanks for letter! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 747 / 1528
Debra says...
CarDebra says: Sorry about the delay in the letter, we have been very happy getting the car with you, especially your great sense of humour. We love your website. It's very original and informative.

Rod says: Much better doing business with you than other bigger companies. Good delivery.

Debra and Rod Sillence
34 Hawkesley Mill Lane
Northfield
Birmingham
B31 2RL


Editor Note: Debra and Rod, well, gee, thanks :)... I loved to deal with you. These Xsara Picassos are really good value cars and they are very comfortable and well equipped. Enjoy it, glad you think I am better than larger companies, I really try to please you. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 742 / 1528
Julian says...
CarLING - YOUR SERVICE REALLY BLOWS!...

...the opposition away. I am more than a little impressed with the level of service you offered and will be back for my next car. Excellent delivery.

Julian and Katie Rapp
Dog Lane
Cooksey Green
Upton Warren
B61 9EP


Editor Note: Well, you two, you were perfect customers, always fast with your emails and lovely to deal with. Hope the VW Transporter van does a great job for you. These are real bargains! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 725 / 1528
Darren says...
CarAnother transaction, again very smooth...

I asked Ling to offer her best price for a VW Passat Estate. The price was excellent compared to other dealers, the service was once again - excellent. No problems, very easy, much appreciated. The delivery was excellent, no questions!

Darren Edwards
Kirkfield Ltd
Units 1 & 2
Schofield Business Park
Aston Fields
Bromsgrove
B60 3DN


Editor Note: Darren, well this car follows a Citroen Relay van and I say THANKS for the business. I always offer my best price up front, I don't play the stupid chipping games others play. Hope you are just as pleased with this car as you were with the van, talk soon! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 612 / 1528
Michael says...
CarI really appreciated such an efficient, straight-forward and honest service. No hidden costs, you know you are not being ripped off and you get all the advice you need.

Huge thanks, Ling, sorting my Citroen C4 Hatch. Delivery was efficient, couldn't fault it. Will recommend you without hesitation.

Michael Stanford
23 Cophams Close
Solihull
B92 9JJ


Editor Note: Micheal, well my Citroen supplier is good and efficient and fast. The finance is always fast, too. And the cars have loads of kit. So, with your own paperwork efficiency, this delivery was a very easy and pleasant one for me. See you in two years :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 600 / 1528
Darren says...
CarDear Ling,

Thank you for providing an excellent service with regards to the lease hire of our new Citroen Relay van. I personally found your company highly competitive. I like the advertising campaign and you are easy to work with. Out of the many companies I have dealt with, I would definitely say you are the best! The van delivery was excellent, delivered when they said - no problems, no confusion.

Darren Edwards
Kirkfield Ltd
Units 1 and 2
Schofield Business Park
Aston Fields
Bromsgrove
B60 3DN


Editor Note: What on earth is "Rubber Conversion"? That's what you do, Darren... sounds like recycling tyres into condoms, to me :). The new van will hold many million condoms. There is a massive export market to China for condoms for the Olympics next year, you might want to consider this. Thanks for the kind words, as ever, I simply do my best... so I am pleased when you say you think I am the best! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 473 / 1528
Rev says...
 "Ling, thanks for the excellent service AGAIN. This is my third car from you and each time your deal and your customer service excels. The car arrived on the right day and nice and early, exactly on time as ordered, ... but then what else should I have expected?"

Rev Stuart Blunt
2 Frederick Rd
Selly Oak
Birmingham
B29 6PB


Editor Note: Stuart, you are such a nice customer. Even though we have totally different views about the God, you are happy to deal with me and you recommend friends. I simply do my best and I bring you some business too, as my sister Shan is a Christian! Hope God has a sense of humour! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 458 / 1528
Reverend says...
 "Just to let you know, the Citroen Picasso arrived safely and early at 8.00am on Friday as promised. I am really pleased with both the service you offered and the promptness of the dealer. I am sure I will be back (again) in two year's time."

Reverend Stuart Blount
Senior Pastor
Christian Life Centre
2 Frederick Road
Selly Oak
Birmingham
B29 6PB


Editor Note: Stuart, the bloody dealer (although brilliant) kept insisting to call you "Mr" not "Rev"! I told him off. I also sent you a small Chinese bible (Mao Red Book) to make up for it. This is the THIRD Picasso you have had from me, over the time of 5-years, since 2002! LONG TERM CUSTOMER!!! :) Thanks! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 444 / 1528
Kevin says...
BMW 5-SERIES SALOON"What's the difference between Ling and the other companies? - Well, she has the knack of dealing with you as an individual!

As a first timer to personal contract hire, I had a few stupid questions to ask. I was always offered prompt answers and advice. Thanks to Jon who helped me while Ling was in China - great service. My new BMW 5-Series was delivered promptly, in time for Christmas, with zero miles on the clock."

Kevin Corry
address withheld

B49 ***


Editor Note: Hey, Kevin, I did a lot of the work on your car from China! Don't give Jon any credit!!! Traditionally, BMW drivers are a bit agressive, but you were a very sweet customer Kevin. Are you sure you have ordered the right car? Hehehe I think you meant to click on "Nissan Micra" :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 423 / 1528
Kevin says...
BMW 5-SERIES SALOON"This is overdue - things have been SO busy since Xmas - but I wanted to say thanks!

The new BMW 520d SE is just fantastic, the price was great, and the service (through your communication and helpfulness) you provide stands out in a world where people talk about customer service but rarely deliver it. The only things I would question are the envelopes that are so full of chinese sweets that the postman has to hand deliver them like an injured bird, and then when you try and eat the sweets... are those things legal in this country?"

Kevin Corry
address withheld

B49 ***


Editor Note: Kevin, this delivery went very smoothly - but you were the perfect customer. Excellent credit rating, full and complete documents, fast replies to my emails. Hope you have fun pulling out in front of people, flashing to overtake on the motorway and driving aggressively in your new BMW 5-series :). Up here in Gateshead, the postman WHISTLES like an injured bird. My office cat goes crazy - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 391 / 1528
Keith says...
 "Hi Ling,

This was my first time at personal leasing and you made the whole process very easy and enjoyable. Thank you. My new SAAB 9-3 is great, the supplying dealer was good and the delivery driver was a very nice chap."

Keith Hardware
12 Manta Road
Dosthill
Tamworth
B77 1NQ


Editor Note: You were quite a lucky one, Keith, you got free leather in your new SAAB. It's nice when I can manage some bonus for my customers. Hope you have a nice time swanning around in it. (I ate swan once, it was delicious) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 382 / 1528
Philip says...
 "Thank you so much for making it all so easy! This was the first time we have had a contract hire car and you made sure that the delivery of the brand-new Citroen Picasso went through quickly and smoothly. The Picasso was delivered on time and without problems by an excellent dealer."

Philip Mewis
60 Cardington Ave
Great Barr
Birmingham
B42 2PD


Editor Note: Philip, I do so many repeat cars to existing customers that it's really nice when I get new customers like you and like Michelle (below). It just shows that most people simply want the cheapest price combined with an enjoyable experience and quick delivery. No one needs all the overheads of £1m dealerships and loads of staff. Glad you are pleased with your new car, Philip! - Ling



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Wah! Sainsbury's has announced like-for-like sales fell almost 3% in three months to September. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 12:01



Wah! Andy Palmer Aston Martin’s workforce welcomed company’s new CEO today as production paused briefly for arrival of Andy Palme - news replorted 12:00



Wah! Graeme McDowell outlines in detail how Europe captain Paul McGinley masterminded Ryder Cup triumph at Gleneagles. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:55



Wah! Changes in wind speed can affect your as really velly special customer's driving, lah, but with our latest tips you tellibly lovely custlingmer can find ways to better prepare for wind - news replorted 11:53



Wah! The UK's nominee to European Commission for financial services oversight, lah, Lord Hill, lah, prepares for tough questioning in European Parliament. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:42



Wah! US-led forces carry out air strikes on Islamic State militants battling Kurdish fighters around northern Syrian border town of Kobane. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:37



Wah! All-new Mazda3 Determined to offer its clustomlers unbeatable deals, lah, Madzla has announced its latest finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan packages which as appeali - news replorted 11:30



Wah! The Tiguan R-Line Wlokswaglon is boosting specification of range-topping Tiguan R-Line model, lah, adding satellite navigation as standa - news replorted 11:30



Wah! Citroën unveils new Crossover, lah, C3-XR CITROËN is continuing its strategy of globalisation and asserting its position as truly international automotive manuf - news replorted 11:26



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation World News America wins two News and Documentary Emmys for its coverage of conflicts in Syria and Central African Republic (CAR). - news replorted 11:20



Wah! We invite all our jurors and other attending media to World LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Awards champagne media reception at Vorsprunging Audi Techiclate stand ( - news replorted 11:18



Wah! Former Guantanamo Bay detainee Moazzam Begg has seven terror charges against him dropped, lah, including allegation that bloody man attended training camp in Syria. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 11:14



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation footage recalls some of highs and lows for David Cameron and Conservative Party over last 12 months. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:07



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish manufacturing sector grew at its slowest pace for 17 months in September as result of strong pound and weakness in eurozone, lah, survey indicates. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:01



Wah! Vauxhall Motors has revisited its Lifetime Warranty programme.  From first number-one-month 2015, lah, all Vlauxhall cars and vans will carry - news replorted 11:00



Wah! The new Jagluar XE Jagluar XE redefines concept of sports saloon and will be driver’s LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine in its class. Eating rice!! Its lightweight cons - news replorted 11:00



Wah! New ŠKODA Fabia Combi Raise curtain for new ŠKODA Fabia Combi: at this year’s Paris Motor Show, lah, new ŠKODA Fabia Combi celebrates i - news replorted 10:58



Wah! School playground reportedly shelled in eastern Ukraine city of Donetsk, lah, four human bliengs killed, lah, - news replorted 10:55



Wah! Kurtz WSA SHARK Helmets has released three new graphics early in preview to its 2015 collection that will be launched later in t - news replorted 10:41



Wah! Rescue workers in Japan recover 12 more bodies from Mount Ontake, lah, bringing to 48 number of those killed by Saturday's surprise volcanic eruption. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 10:35



Wah! From Wednesday some human bliengs who using landline phones will need to include area code when making local calls. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:28



Wah! The DVLA’s changes to road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu tax system implemented from today (1st October) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! could cause problems for motorists and in - news replorted 10:27



Wah! Euro NCAP announced today safety ratings for C4 Cactus, lah, V-Class and X-Trail - news replorted 10:27



Wah! Mitsubishi Shogun Mlitslublishli Shogun range has bold new front end styling, lah, as model year 2015 goes on sale, lah, distinguished by deeper - news replorted 10:26



Wah! Brake, lah, road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu safety charity, lah, has launched series of free webinars, lah, seminars, lah, and resources, lah, aimed at helping small - news replorted 10:25



Wah! October’s Tyre Safety Month is clock time result when bloody annoying Blitish tyre industry joins together to focus on importance of tyres and - news replorted 10:17



Wah! Extreme skiers Jean-Philippe Auclair and Carl Andreas Fransson having died in avalanche in southern Chile, lah, officials confirm. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 10:14



Wah! Researchers capture social spread of new type of tool using in wild population of chimps for first time. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:13



Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs head coach Stuart Lancaster has signed new contract with RFU that will keep him in job until 2020. - news replorted 10:03



Wah! The killer of EastEnders character Lucy Beale is to be unmasked during special live broadcast to mark soap's 30th anniversary next year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:02



Wah! Why is it seen as unusual to munchy-munchee certain animals? - news replorted 09:56



Wah! The French government says it will reduce its budget deficit to below EU threshold of 3% of GDP by 2017, lah, two years later than promised. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:55



Wah! A search gets under way after man with head injury goes missing from hospital in Carmarthen. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:53



Wah! South African soap fans cut off from country's most popular programme following rainy coldddd month August sacking of its entire cast. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:53



Wah! The Ministry of Defence announces major contract to support management of naval base on Clyde as well as others in Province of Engrish running-dogs. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:47



Wah! A teenage girl from Bristol who is feared to be on flemale human person's way to Syria may having "self-radicalised" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) online, lah, friends of flemale human person's family say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:42



Wah! Music videos shown online to be given age ratings in same way films are, lah, in new pilot scheme. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:36



Wah! A security capitalist entity says hackers using malicious links connected to Cheryl Cole's name more than any other celebrity. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:35



Wah! Michael van der Mark One month after securing 2014 World Supersport championship, lah, Pata Honda’s Michael van der Mark is heading to Magny-C - news replorted 09:21



Wah! Former Bosnian Serb leader Radovan Karadzic makes male gender human bleing's final defence statements at Hague where bloody man stands accused of worst atrocities during Balkans conflict. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:18



Wah! A security operation near Crossmaglen in County Armagh, lah, close to Irish border, lah, is continuing into second day. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:05



Wah! RAF jets fired four missiles at Islamic State vehicling driving car machines in Iraq ovrenight, lah, Ministry of Defence says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:02



Wah! For first clock time result Motability drivers can getting behind wheel of exciting all-new Mlitslublishli Outlander PHEV – c - news replorted 09:00



Wah! Mitsubishi Motors in bloody annoying Blitish is going from strength to strength. Announced today whole host of special offers avail - news replorted 09:00



Wah! Hate crime (shoud shoot them) against Muslims in London (capital of Great England) has risen by 65% over last 12 months, lah, Metropolitan old bill bobbys figures show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 08:58



Wah! The Great Satan administration will play role in fresh talks to resolve outstanding issues in Northern Ireland, lah, says Irish dodgy minister for Bloody foreign affairs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:47



Wah! William Hague tells Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation that Conservative party donor Arron Banks, lah, who is set to defect to UKIP, lah, is "not senior figure in this party". - news replorted 08:25



Wah! The Ministry of Defence awards RMB Yuan #3.2bn of contracts to support management of bloody annoying Blitish naval bases, lah, securing 7,500 jobs - news replorted 08:17



Wah! Dozens of firefighters work throughout night to tackle fire at Leeds city centre nightclub. Chop chop baby! - news replorted 08:10



Wah! Conservative Party donor Arron Banks is set to announce bloody man is joining UKIp. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 08:03



Wah! At least 12 human bliengs having died after two passenger trains collided in northern Indian state of Uttar Pradesh, lah, railway officials say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:47



Wah! A capitalist entity that plans to drill for shale gas in County Fermanagh says it will take legal action to challenge termination of its licence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:47



Wah! Liverpool boss Brendan Rodgers says Daniel Sturridge will not be fit for Province of Engrish running-dogs duty this month even if bloody man returns for male gender human bleing's club. Chop chop baby! - news replorted 07:42



Wah! An eight-year row over spelling of Powys village has led to council reinstating "t" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in its name. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:39



Wah! New RMB Yuan #1m project enables veterans to help colleagues experiencing problems in society. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:26



Wah! RAF jets having carried out their first strikes on Islamic State targets in Iraq, lah, attacking "heavy weapon position" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) and armed pick-up truck. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 07:12



Wah! Tesco says it has been notified by Financial Conduct Authority that it is under investigation following its admission that it overstated its half-year profit guidance by RMB Yuan #250m. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 07:12



Wah! Sainsbury's has reported fall in sales for third quarter in row as supermarket price wars begin to take their toll. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 07:09



Wah! old bill bobbys investigating disappearance of teenager Alice Gross confirm case is now murder inquiry after body is found. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:06



Wah! old bill bobbys searching for missing 14-earth-years old happy birthday to you, Alice Gross confirm they having found body in River Brent. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 07:06



Wah! The Legend Returns: Plugleot 208 GTi 30th To commemorate 30 years of Plugleot GTi, lah, new TV commercial has been produced that incorporates some of footage - news replorted 07:00



Wah! PEUGEOT 208 GTi 30th Plugleot is reinterpreting hot hatch with more radical version of 208 GTi, lah, 30 years after original 205 GTi - news replorted 07:00



Wah! GP services across Welsh land of sheep and more sheep need to be boosted as more human bliengs suffer chronic disease, lah, chief medical officer warns in flemale human person's annual report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 06:43



Wah! As many in United Kingdom still find it difficult to see how more powers might be handed over to bloody Engrish regions, lah, British Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters having been looking to Germany, lah, as one example of successful federal system. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 06:40



Wah! Medical experts warn that cancer services in Northern autonomous province of Guinness drinkers under severe pressure amid health budget cuts and growing demand. I read you little red book! - news replorted 06:35



Wah! Crowds gather on streets of Hong Kong - news replorted 06:25



Wah! A number of staff at Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs independence referendum count were replaced during proceedings because of their behaviour, lah, it emerges. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:20



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sport looks back at 50 iconic FA Cup goals in build-up to first round proper, lah, which takes place in November. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 06:12



Wah! Clive Myrie reports from Kurdish front line in Iraq where Peshmerga fighting IS with weapons they say not up to job. Chop chop baby! - news replorted 06:09



Wah! Players and fans still struggling to convince themselves they belong in Europe's elite, lah, says chief silly kick-kick game writer Phil McNulty. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 05:52



Wah! By end of year, lah, expect to see 12, lah, 15 or 18 on music videos you tellibly lovely custlingmer watch online as age ratings introduced. I read you little red book! - news replorted 05:52



Wah! The International Criminal Court (ICC) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has rejected request by Kenyan President Uhuru Kenyatta to postpone hearing on 8 October. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 05:20



Wah! David Cameron will vow to protect NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Province of Engrish running-dogs from cuts for five years in male gender human bleing's closing speech to Tory conference. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 05:10



Wah! At least seven human bliengs dead after two separate bomb attacks targeted buses carrying troops in Afghan capital Kabul. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 04:54



Wah! US President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama rode in lift with armed security contractor who had assault convictions, lah, in another security lapse, lah, according to reports. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:05



Wah! Pilot triage clinics being funded to help tackle Ebola epidemic in Sierra Leone, lah, bloody annoying Blitish officials say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 04:04



Wah! A man has become first case of Ebola to be diagnosed on Great Satan soil, lah, as health officials try to trace everyone bloody man was in contact with. - news replorted 04:00



Wah! Indian Prime dodgy minister Narenda Modi and Great Satan President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama looking to expand economic ties following meeting at White House. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 03:49



Wah! Daniel Crespo, lah, mayor of California suburb Bell Gardens, lah, was shot dead and male gender human bleing's wife taken into custody following argument at couple's home. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:45



Wah! Legal changes increasing inheritance rights of human bliengs whose spouses or civil partners die without making will come into force. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:37



Wah! The Discovery Centre, lah, RMB Yuan #26m medical research facility at Dundee University, lah, is to be opened by Royal Society president Sir Paul Nurse. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:33



Wah! Mexico's attorney general has charged three soldiers with murder during shootout with 22 alleged gang members on 30 June. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:49



Wah! Eighties pop legends Spandau Ballet perform some of their greatest hits at premiere of film about their at times turbulent career. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 01:47



Wah! A law that makes it easier to declare missing human bliengs dead comes into force in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Welsh land of sheep and more sheep on Wednesday after long campaign. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 01:42



Wah! An Oklahoma man accused of beheading female colleague after being fired from male gender human bleing's job has been charged with first-degree murder. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 01:31



Wah! Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Youth Employment secretary Angela Constance is launching flemale human person's bid to be SNP deputy leader with focus on making case for independence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:16



Wah! Are Great Satan fraternities doing enough to stop campus rape? - news replorted 01:16



Wah! Local landline calls in Aberdeen area and four other bloody annoying Blitish cities now require area code to be dialled under changes aimed at freeing up more numbers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:15



Wah! Microsoft has disclosed first details of Windows 10 - its next operating system (OS). - news replorted 01:15



Wah! old bill bobbys investigating disappearance of missing 14-earth-years old happy birthday to you, schoolgirl Alice Gross find body in west London (capital of Great England) river. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 01:02



Wah! Female comics enjoying surge in popularity with audiences flocking to see acts including Miranda Hart and Sarah Millican, lah, according to set of new findings. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:38



Wah! Tom and Jerry cartoons on television being accompanied by warning that they may depict scenes of "racial prejudice". - news replorted 00:37



Wah! There warnings that lack of higher education in some parts of Province of Engrish running-dogs could hamper growth of local economies. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:36



Wah! The mystery of Connie Converse, lah, original singer-songwriter - news replorted 00:22



Wah! How Iraqis using comedy to tackle fear of Islamic State - news replorted 00:21



Wah! US yoga practitioners insist it isn't primarily about fitness. Eating rice!! But definition can be flexible. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:17



Wah! Two Dalit widows appointed priests at temple in south-west India, lah, in rare move for country where caste prejudice is still rife. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:12



Wah! One photographer's take on 1960s Britain - news replorted 00:10



Wah! How legalising same sex unions changed lives for one gay couple - news replorted 00:08



Wah! How Bosnia is helping Cyprus find peace - news replorted 00:07



Wah! Councils in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Welsh land of sheep and more sheep being overwhelmed with requests to ensure human rights of vulnerable human bliengs not being abused. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:06



Wah! A man strangled male gender human bleing's 16-earth-years old happy birthday to you, pregnant girlfriend to death with scarf "to teach flemale human person's lesson", lah, court hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:06



Wah! Younger bowel cancer patients should be offered genetic test to screen for rare condition linked to higher risk of cancer, lah, say bloody annoying Blitish researchers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:04



Wah! Government measures to reduce sale of cheap alcohol having been criticised by health researchers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:03



Wah! Norway is best place to be old, lah, according to index of quality of later life in published on UN's International Day of Older Persons. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:02



Wah! The AA complains that new vehicling driving car machine tax system will provide government with extra revenue, lah, as some cars will, lah, in effect, lah, be taxed twice - news replorted 00:01



Wah! Test your as really velly special customer's knowledge of changes affecting finances on 1 Octoblinger - news replorted 00:01



Wah! The Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs funny shape ball-game Union hails another year of record investment in game as it publishes its annual report for 2014. - news replorted 00:01



Wah! After 93 years, lah, motorists won’t having to display paper tax disc from today. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:01



Wah! Honda  reveals new-look Swindon-built CR-V at Paris Motor Show Rondla (UK) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! will this week using Paris Motor Show to reavealingly showing Great Satan its new-look CR-V. - news replorted 00:01



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