Show FAQ
Close (X)
Close (X)
Close (X)
Close (X)

LIVE CHAT

Props/Quotes

>> Online
Wai
- - Offline
Randall
- - Offline
Yajun
- - Offline
Ling V

Admin

- - Offline
Guy
- - Offline
Holly
- - Offline
Jon
>> Online
Adrian

Aftersales

- - Offline
Ling V
CAR LEASING
Want a cheap
new lease car?

Start HERE!


Cheapest Car Leasing CHAT
My Customer Letters!
My Fun Pages!
Read All About Me!
Note: I live inside this website Monday to Friday 9am-6pm, to give you the very best service and make your experience a happy one! - I am Ling, accept no substitutes
Car LeasingCar Leasing
Vote for your favourite motorway sign message!
Version 237.1.
You can trust me! ... In 2014 I'll rent over £75 million of cars (at RRP)!
Spacer
Spacer

CAR LEASING - CONTRACT HIRE - CHEAP LEASE CARS

Home
Cars and Vans
How It Works
Price Lists
About Ling
Customers
 Fun Stuff
Quote/ Order
 
Quiz Ling's Movies Chinese Car Websites Free Cash Apply Noodle Apply Werthers My Bus
Speed Cameras Chop Gear Mongol Rally UK Rallycross LingTube Website Advice Website Article
Car Flu Car Websites Google Censorship Missle Truck Top 10 Car Ads Suspension Movie Personal Plates Motoring Law Help Chinese Vote Now! World Cup 2006 Burma Pledge Hangman BBC News Monetise Twitter iPad vs iLing SuperMondays MOT Game Bottom Trumps FREE Ling Badge Halloween Cars First Aid
Top Matrix Sign Messages Karaoke Madness Stupid Crash Game

Loading...

The twitter pigeon is loading "LINGsCARS"
LIVE + KICKING twitter feed... WAIT!

New!
Intro Film News Blog Office TV Contact Moan Links Play Quiz Privacy Policy Google Visitors
Ling Valentine Quote Quote Apply for Quote DRAGONS' DEN

Richard Farleigh - "I wanted to invest; I was amazed by Ling's
complete lack of nerves, and also by her business acumen."

Duncan Bannatyne - "I wanted to
invest... but ye turrn'ed me dooon!"

Deborah Meaden
"Harrumph! I'm out!"

UK WARNING: Customers reporting many other internet prices hiding true lease costs! Beware dodgy companies selling high initial rental "6+" leases
Ling Valentine is Viz's Official Ethnic Business Ambassador Play stupid crash game! Cheap insurance Google Spider Google Spider
Food --->
Google Spider Food

View LIVE visitors: 8 online

 
Hi! I am Ling Cheap Car Leasing - WAH! from Dragons' Den. I lease cheap new cars!
UPDATE... The latest car I've added is a Volvo V40 1.6 D2 8v (115bhp) R Design Hatchback 5dr 1560cc Diesel at £292.61 inc VAT at 13:06 on 19th Sep - Ling
Car Leasing Traffic Light
COLLECTOR'S BADGES!
FREE for everyone who loves badgers!

No other car leasing company gives badges! They are miserable gits!
BUT LING DOES! FREE!
3
NEW
BADGES
HOW DO I GET A BADGE?
 
Q1. Name a Swedish manufacturer?
One correct question wins
an "original" Ling badge
 
 
 
 
Q2. Can you name the man behind Top Gear?
Two correct questions wins large "special" badge
 
 
 
 
 
 
Q3. On a scale of 1 to 10, who is the most annoying?
Three correct questions wins set of 3 "special" badges
 
 
 
 
 
 
NOW PRESS BUTTON!!
WHAT WILL YOU WIN?

OR...

...OR ALL THREE?
 
I give away 10x free badge/day!
Car Leasing badge!
Fill in my form below to apply Ling BADGE!

BADGE SONG!
Listen while wearing!


Ling Van Leasing!

LIMITED EDITION - only 3,000 badges ever made!

Every web visitor...
...can apply for superb-design collectors item Ling BADGE! Traditional METAL badge will become treasured in the future. Wear!

FREE!
Genuine metal badge with "brass" pin!

MADE IN GERMANY

There is some DANGER to small children if they choke on badge, or if they poke out an eye with the monkey metal faux "brass" pin. This is unfortunate. Swallowing badge can also cause metal POISONING!

Note BADGE is a COLLECTORS ITEM. Do not go complaining to Trading Standards if it is not the size you expected, or I will label you a pig-headed capitalist-roader and
you will be subject to my substantial penalties.

Lifesize Badge!
Lifesize badge next to Nissan Z350: "At last, a Nissan with a decent badge!"





10 BADGES A DAY
go to deserving website visitors!
APPLY TODAY!
As soon as you fill in the details above (for 10 visitors per day) your COLLECTOTS ITEM badge may be in post!
No need to wait 21 days for delivery!
If the British Post Office government monopoly Peter Mandelson sell-off works OK, you will have free BADGE next day! - You have free badge, now rent cheap car!



Car Leasing badge! If you are lucky, you get COLLECTOR'S BADGE!
IF YOU DO,
I want badge photo emailing to me and I will publish! Best photos win extra prizes!

You should seek truth from facts.
Three sayings which match my philosophy are;


"It does not matter if a car is black or white
as long as it gets you to the shops"

- Deng Xiao Ping


"People of Britain, you can trust me"
- Tony Blair

"I am Chinese not Catholic:
I cannot do miracles"

- Ling


Long Live Ling
- Ling
lingscars.com
CLICK! See 275 clients live in LINGO!
Live!!
CLICK to VIEW!
Online Service
Response Times
Quote > Proposal > Order > Delivery
 
70 CLIENTS IN 'PROPOSAL'
...LING REPLIES IN:
  HRS : MINUTES sec  
 
205 CLIENTS IN 'ORDER'
...LING REPLIES IN:
  HRS : MINUTES sec  
Lingscars.com Limited (GB)
Customers use my secure LINGO management system.
Response times above based on last 4 hour period between
9am - 6pm, Mon to Fri
-Ling
WOW! UK's best service times!
No Waiting
lingscars.com
Hello, hello! This is me!
Don't run, little customers! I'm friendly...
I am the Viz UK business ambassador!
Post me Ferrero-Rochers! Yum Yum!
Unlike most other internet car leasing sites, I publish all my contact information openly!
...so, you know who I am
- Ling


THE UK's FAVOURITE
CAR LEASING WEBSITE!

The UK's FAVOURITE car leasing website
The UK's FAVOURITE car leasing website
Boss: Ling Valentine MSc IoD
LING World Headquarters
Vance Business Park
Gateshead, NE11 9NE
Tel 0191 460 9444
Fax 0870 486 1130
sales@LINGsCARS.com
I prefer email to phone - Ling
VAT No: 866 0241 30
Co Reg No: 6178634
Consumer Credit Licence: 663330
Data Protection No: Z1098490
Best Before: 17/08/2007
LING World HQ
People's Republic of Gateshead!

 
Spacer

Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  Nissan e-NV200 I give you tellibly lovely custlingmer damn thanks of billion Chinesey human bliengs to its range of versatile, lah, practical and innovative models, lah, Nissling is cementing its position as global player i - news replorted 10:33



Wah! LATEST:  World premiere of Wlokswaglon TRISTAR at IAA Multifunctional like Swiss Tommy Atkins Liberation Army knife. What the hell I mean??!! Adaptable, lah, reliable and all-rounder: on eve of 30th anniversary of t - news replorted 10:18



Wah! Bentley Motorsport & Absolute Racing to compete in China Bentley Motorsport announces next phase of its race-winning Continental GT3 programme, lah, with signing of partner - news replorted 10:14



Wah! Man, lah, 37, lah, arrested in London (capital of Great England) on suspicion of involvement in production of improvised explosive devices in Iraq - news replorted 10:07



Wah! Two Palestinians suspected of abduction and murder of three Israeli teenagers in June-mber month having been killed by Israeli forces, lah, Israel's military says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:05



Wah! Government borrowing remained high in August, lah, hampering chancellor's efforts to reduce public deficit, lah, official figures show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 10:00



Wah! Low key tax disc communication could harm used LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine trade With just week to go until new rules governing vehicling driving car machine excise duty (road tax) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! begin, lah, Auto Trader has added its voice t - news replorted 09:51



Wah! At least three human bliengs killed in bomb attack in Pakistani city of Peshawar as violence returns after several months of relative calm. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 09:31



Wah! A Sinn Féin MLA says bloody woman is "very concerned" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) about pressure on emergency department at Royal Victoria Hospital on Monday night. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:24



Wah! Andy Murray has spoken publicly for first clock time result about written-down messages on dead tree bloody man made on eve of Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs independence referendum. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 09:24



Wah! Leaders from 120 countries will meet in New York on Monday for climate change summit called by UN secretary General Ban Ki Moon. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:19



Wah! Liberia is to become first nation in Africa to completely stop cutting down its trees in return for cash from Norway. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:11



Wah! British Olympic champion Katherine Grainger is back in training and considering bid to compete at Rio 2016 Games. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:09



Wah! Hunstanton Sea Life Sanctuary in Norfolk is set to re-open in Octoblinger after tidal surge damage. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:06



Wah! Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs comedian Billy Connolly has said there will be "hell to pay" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) if David Cameron does not honour male gender human bleing's pledge of extra powers for ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:05



Wah! The team which overhauled government's websites is attempting to solve problem of effective online identity verification. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:05



Wah! Mitsubishi Outlander PHEV TWO Mlitslublishli dealerships in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land went all out to spread word about game-changing Outlander PHEV at speci - news replorted 09:00



Wah! FISITA World Automotive Summit 2014 5th annual FISITA World Automotive Summit to be held in Paris, lah, France, lah, from 30 September – 1 Octoblinger this year will - news replorted 09:00



Wah! A second video has been released showing British journalist John Cantlie, lah, who is being held hostage by Islamic State (IS) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! militants. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:53



Wah! On show at Museum of Modern Art in Welsh land of sheep and more sheep - news replorted 08:52



Wah! A badger found shot in abdomen inside west Somerset cull zone suffered "cruel and unacceptable" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) death, lah, anti-cull campaigners say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 08:43



Wah! The presenter and physicist Brian Cox says bloody man supports idea that many universes may exist. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:42



Wah! Andy Murray speaks publicly for first clock time result about written-down messages on dead tree bloody man made on eve of Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs referendum. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 08:40



Wah! Plans for how Welsh land of sheep and more sheep will collect and manage its own taxes will be revealed by finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan dodgy minister Jane Hutt on Tuesday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 08:29



Wah! A London (capital of Great England) bus used in Allied fighty bang-bang effort of 1914 is retracing its route in Belgium. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 08:15



Wah! World leaders including Great Satan President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama holding what they say is crucially important summit on climate change at UN in New York. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 08:09



Wah! Labour deputy leader Harriet Harman has said that "long-term plan" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) is needed to address problems in UK, lah, such as pay falling behind cost of living. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 08:03



Wah! Championship leader Lewis Hamilton heads to Japanese Grand Prix eyeing first ever win at tough Suzuka track. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 07:55



Wah! Ex-Manchester United player Phil Neville believes club need another two transfer windows of heavy spending to contend. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:43



Wah! Troubled supermarket giant Tesco says its new chief financial officer, lah, Alan Stewart, lah, is joining capitalist entity immediately, lah, more than two months earlier than originally planned. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:42



Wah! Only third of rail passengers happy with way their train capitalist entity deals with delays or cancellations, lah, survey has suggested. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:40



Wah! Designer shoe maker Jimmy Choo announces plans to list its shares on London (capital of Great England) Stock Exchange. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:22



Wah! The Rockefeller family, lah, which made its fortune from oil, lah, is to sell its investments in fossil fuels and put money into clean energy. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:20



Wah! Ceefax, lah, service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service relied upon for sports news in days before smartphones and apps, lah, celebrates its 40th birthday today. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:18



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sport takes look at 10 of best moments from Ryder Cup. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 07:16



Wah! Welsh land of sheep and more sheep risks losing key part of its historical heritage according campaigners trying to find buyer for Cardiff's Coal Exchange. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:16



Wah! A leading cancer charity says it is concerned disease is not being spotted early enough in young human bliengs because many too embarrassed to talk to their Gp. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 07:02



Wah! Ministers accused of "shutting up shop" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) by not revealing how each of Wales' seven enterprise zones is performing. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 06:46



Wah! A court in China has found prominent Uighur scholar Ilham Tohti guilty of separatism and jailed him for life, lah, male gender human bleing's lawyer says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:31



Wah! US authorities say Omar Gonzalez, lah, who broke into White House on Friday evening, lah, had 800 rounds of ammunition, lah, machete and two hatchets in male gender human bleing's car. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 06:16



Wah! A growing number of Super-Duper-Chinese-State companies exporting "tools of torture" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) such as electric shock batons and spiked metal batons, lah, Amnesty says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:06



Wah! Thousands of Hong Kong students to gather in park in front of government offices, lah, on second day of week-long protest. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:44



Wah! David Cameron is to meet Iranian President Hassan Rouhani to persuade male gender human bleing's country to join international action against Islamic State. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 04:31



Wah! A human rights watchdog is to investigate Met old bill bobbys after it emerged references to discrimination were deleted from internal reports. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:03



Wah! The Great Satan and allied nations having launched campaign of air strikes against Islamic State (IS) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! militants in Syria, lah, Pentagon says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:49



Wah! US and other nations begin air strikes against Islamic State in Syria, lah, Pentagon says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:35



Wah! The number of human bliengs dying from dengue fever in Malaysia has more than tripled this year compared with 2013, lah, with 250 cases being reported daily. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 01:50



Wah! Comedian Dawn French is to become new chancellor of Cornwall's Falmouth University. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 01:38



Wah! White House break-in adds to Secret service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service woes - news replorted 01:30



Wah! How lasers having revealed ancient city beneath forest - news replorted 01:14



Wah! Scientists at American Museum of Natural History and taxidermy experts having preserved Lonesome George, lah, last Pinta giant tortoise, lah, who died in 2012 in Galapagos Islands. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:07



Wah! Hostages' families roll dice with public appeals for release - news replorted 00:38



Wah! Alex Salmond is to address Holyrood for first clock time result since ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land rejected independence and is expected to call for voting age to be lowered. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:38



Wah! Supermarket Tesco's suspension of four executives over overstated profit guidance leads several papers, lah, while others focus on claim (always claiming, huh?) of Breaking Bad-style murder plot. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:36



Wah! Movie style trailers increasingly common for theatrical shows, lah, but not everybody in theatrical world thinks they velly damn good boiled chicken-feet idea. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 00:05



Wah! The White House announces new treasury department measures aimed at stopping companies avoiding Great Satan taxes by merging with overseas firms. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:01



Spacer
5 Titanic Cars
Sky
Top 5 Car

1.5 CDI 107bhp 5dr
diesel, auto, met
Mercedes
B-Class
Grass
Click Here
£279.67
per month, inc VAT
Sky
Top 5 Car

2.2 CDI 170bhp 4dr
diesel, g-tronic auto, met
Mercedes
E-Class Sa
Grass
Click Here
£404.40
per month, inc VAT
Sky
Top 5 Car

1.6 e-HDi A... 90bhp 5dr
diesel, auto, met
Citroen
C4 Grand P
Grass
Click Here
£215.99
per month, inc VAT
Sky
Top 5 Car

1.2 VTi 82bhp 3dr
petrol, man, met
Citroen
DS3
Grass
Click Here
£192.83
per month, inc VAT
Sky
Top 5 Car

1.8 CDI 134bhp 5dr
diesel, auto, met
Mercedes
A-Class
Grass
Click Here
£298.80
per month, inc VAT
Titanic
Spacer
Tyres
Spacer
Viz
Spacer
Dragons' Den
Spacer
Live Google
Spacer
LINGsCARS is verified by Norton Security
Spacer
Play Ling's quiz
Win!
Play my brilliant motoring quiz!
Spacer
Not sponsored by


...don't do lease cars, but if they did, they would be done like this - Ling
Spacer
Auto email updates
Car update me!
Get my latest EMAIL car updates!
Spacer
Traffic
Spacer
Nuclear Truck
My Nuclear
Missile Truck
Spacer
Free Delivery
Spacer
Contact Ling
Spacer
Spacer
Honest John
Spacer
Ling's Awards
Spacer
As seen on TV... Plus over 30 movies!
Spacer
Webcams
Spacer
Want a Quote?
Spacer
Titanic
Spacer
FREE Badge
...get a FREE BADGE!
Collectors item - FREE!

APPLY NOW!
Spacer
LINGsCARS customer mosaic!
Spacer
LIVE customers
Click to see my LIVE lease car customers! - Ling
Spacer
/* */