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UPDATE... The latest car I've added is a Mercedes C-Class Coupe 2.1 CDi BlueEFFICIENCY 16v (201bhp) C250 CDI AMG Sport Edition Premium Plus Coupe 2dr 2143cc Diesel at £360.00 inc VAT at 13:23 today - Ling
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Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling

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Customer Letter: 1526 / 1528
Bruno says...
VOLVO XC90Lings Cars does exactly what it says on the website. The process was precise and accurate and recorded so even a non computer person like me managed to take delivery of a superb new Volvo XC90. As an ex–company car driver for 35 years the LingsCars site gave me the opportunity to keep driving new cars. LingsCars site and process excellent. Chinese sweeties awful. Thank you Ling. Dealer Service – Excellent – Very little contact, delivered on time.

Bruno Chorzelewski
47 Nidd Approach
LS22 7UJ

Editor Note: Mr Bruno Chor...something, let me tell you - "Very little contact" is exactly what you want, from car dealers. The less, the better - trust me. :) Your XC90 is stunning value for a £30,000 car! Glad you like everything (except the sweets, designed to kill) :) - Ling

Customer Letter: 1422 / 1528
William says...
carThis is my second lease from Ling and I tried to get as good a deal as my first contract - however I failed. I compromised cost for performance and got a car , Citroen C3, which is weak and tinny but is cheap to run. I wanted a new shape Fiesta but was let down and had to go with what was available.

William Stirling
2 Ashroyd
LS26 0BN

Editor Note: Yep, Bill. In the current climate of credit crunch I did exactly the same thing with my own car. Why waste money on expensive cars? Last time you have a cheap Seat which was more car, but was more expensive (if a bargain at the time). But in a credit crunch everything gets squeezed and more money in your pocket is always a good thing :) I would not say the 1.4 HDI C3 is weak, but it will do about 70mpg if you treat it gently! New shape Fiestas were all on back-order when you got your car... not much I can do if the Ford factories are backlogged, sorry. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1362 / 1528
Diane says...
CITROEN C4 PICASSODealing with LINGsCARS gave me peace of mind from beginning to end, never had a problem, helping me with any concerns I had. I would definitely recommend LINGsCARS, probably using Ling after our existing contract runs out. I was disappointed the car didn't arrive on a trailer.

Diane Mawson
4 West Lea Crescent
LS19 7EE

Editor Note: Di, glad you are happy with my service. We can't have it all ways, re the delivery (Birmingham to Leeds). If cars are trailered then someone has to pay and the cost of the rental goes up. It is cheaper to drive cars because that's what they are built to do. Any miles will be adjusted so you don't pay for them at the end. Apart from that you seem a happy bunny with your new C4 Picasso. Thanks so much for comments :) - Ling

Customer Letter: 1265 / 1528
Matthew says...
 This is my second car from Ling and again it was a pain free process. Good value and excellent service. Ling is a bit different, and I like that. Excellent delivery of my new Koleos. Thanks again.

Matthew Nabozny
Address Withheld for security
LS14 ***

Editor Note: Yep, Matthew, you are one of my best Solicitor clients. You are a Polish descent person, and I love to deal with multi-ethnic clients :) I always worry about making a tiny mistake and getting sued, hahaha. This Renault Koleos replaces a Citroen C4 you had last time. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1251 / 1528
Susan says...
CHEVROLET AVEOFab friendly efficient fast service - I am loving the LINGO area where you can keep up to date with progress. Loving the sweets, too!!!

Ling is one of the best, both myself and my partner have cars from Ling and we are both very very happy. XXX. Excellent delivery of my new Chevvy Aveo, no problems, delivered on time.

Susan Waterhouse
9 Parkways Grove
LS26 8TP

Editor Note: Sue, you are a superstar to write me such a lovely letter. I really do my best to make you a happy customer, but we end up being good friends after all the chat. Let me know how you get on in the Aveo - a car which is really nice and also cheap, but goes a bit unnoticed. It deserves to sell more. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1147 / 1528
Mitul says...
MAZDA MX-5Very happy with service, fast, efficient and hassle free. Answer all your questions without delay. Will be using again. Excellent delivery on my new MX-5.

Mitul Patel
The Dower House
219 Oakwood Lane

Editor Note: All you need now, is to add sunshine, Mit! You were great to deal with and fun to chat to. Thanks for being lovely. Now, get the top down! - Ling

Customer Letter: 958 / 1528
David says...
CarCar arrived on time this morning and is excellent - had a minor panic after they had left when I couldn't find the jack but realised after reading the instruction manual that it is with the spare wheel under the car!

You were right about insurers, spent an hour on the phone trying to explain the concept of personal contract hire to a call-centre drone in India. They couldn't understand how I could insure a car when I wasn't the owner or the registered keeper - at one point he was convinced that because Citroen Contracts are the registered keeper they would take it back to their registered address every day! In the end I gave up and rang my girlfriends insurer, a small local one-man broker - who understood instantly and quoted me less than the insurance I've got with Norwich Union on my 15yr old Jeep!

Thank-you for an excellent service, I never thought the process of getting a new car could be so easy - and I still don't know how you managed to quote less than not only all the major leasing companies, but cheaper than going direct to Citroen too - the only case I've ever come across of REDUCING cost by adding in a middle-man (woman!). Must be an ancient Chinese magic trick.... I hope all the Dragons are kicking themselves for not investing in you when they had the chance!

Anyway, thank-you once again, you can be sure I'll be doing my best to recommend you to all my colleagues at work - and I'll definitely be in contact in about 2 1/2 years to start looking for my next car - as will my girlfriend when hers expires at the same time.

David Calvert
29 The Green
LS14 6JL

Editor Note: David, what a lovely comment, thanks. I have really enjoyed to deal with you. This supplier is very good these days, after a shaky start, I have trained them. I reduce the prices by ripping out all the showroom costs, the dealer has to pay a salesman for (small) volume. Plus I am harsh with the suppliers, trading volume for no doc fees, free delivery, ripping out the margin etc. And, I work on thin margins. Motor trade is terrible for adding costs to thin air. Bollocks to all that, you just want a car, not a load of fancy showrooms and men in suits, eh? - Ling

Customer Letter: 949 / 1528
Alison says...
CarOver the last 3 years we have ordered 6 cars from Ling. The service has always been great even when we had a problem with the delivery date. She personally sorted it out with dealer. Great service. Many Thanks!

Alison Brown
Candystripe Inc
81 Stonegate Road

Editor Note: Alison, yes you have had many cars :))) The problems with these Peugeot Tepees have been all Peugeot's own making and I have had several customers who had orders cancelled by Peugeot. It is said that Peugeot received a very large order from a London based taxi company for these cars, and ignored personal customers and diverted production to where the £££ was, a terrible thing to do to people who had ordered a car, but commercially profitable. Production slots were put back and back. However, thank God (if not thank Peugeot UK) you got your Tepee, a 9-seat car/minibus thing. Glad you are so pleased with it. It is true you have been a long-time customer (like Cressida below) and I hope this did not spoil your experience too much. I give a hyperlink to your FANTASTIC website where you say: "We present a new concept in childcare dedicated to children and parents. As a member of Candystripe you can expect to leave your children in a safe, clean and learning environment. Our staff will be knowledgeable and helpful."

Car - Ling

Customer Letter: 722 / 1528
Joanne says...
CarI was very pleased with your services from start to finish. I have never leased a vehicle before and Ling made it so easy for me.

The best thing about Ling's service is that you are able to speak to Ling herself. Excellent delivery of my new Golf. I will definitely be using you again!

Joanne Dowson
NIC Services group
4 Cotswold Drive
LS25 2DA

Editor Note: You had a vey good value VW Golf 2.0 Tdi 170bhp Gt Sport 5dr, Joanne. NIC Services group delivers a complete range of facilities management services that offer value for money. It's with pleasure that I supply you a new car! - Ling

Customer Letter: 519 / 1528
Ray says...
 "I am enjoying the new Vectra, it is an excellent new car to drive, but I do feel it should have been delivered with mats (These subsequently arrived in the post after 2-weeks - Ling). The service from yourselves was very good, I have never known e-mail to arrive so quickly. However, your Vauxhall suppliers let you down."

Ray Gosling
Unit 1D Woodside Trading Estate
Low Lane
LS18 5NY

Editor Note: Yes, this Vauxhall did not arrive on time. Vauxhall are getting pretty bad at this with the delivery of new cars, and their dealers are frankly, not the best. Working on finding a better supplier. Still, you are pleased with your car and your mats :) - Ling

Customer Letter: 428 / 1528
Bill says...

This was my first experience of leasing and I have to say that your website made it very easy and gave me confidence to go forward - and I'm glad I did. I settled for a nice Seat Toledo, I got the colour I wanted and all the paperwork was well prepared and instructions were easy to follow. It was a very clean and prompt delivery and easy handover. Thanks again for all your advice and care."

Bill Stirling
2 Ashroyd
LS26 0BN

Editor Note: Bill, as you had your car over Christmas, we both decided to have it delivered to a car dealer in Leeds two minutes from your work - and you collected it at your leisure. That was a great success. You have the 140bhp version of the Toledo, with the Golf GT TDi engine in it, for just £179.99+VAT a month - what a bargain for a fast car. A real Golf GT TDi would have been £80 more (for really, the same car with a different body). You are Scottish ethnic, always nice to deal with another racial minority :) - Ling

Customer Letter: 411 / 1528
David says...
NISSAN PATHFINDER"Ling, thanks for the great service! These days, finding someone who treats every deal with as much care and importance as their first is unusual. Long Live Ling (all the truth!)"

David Brennand
D-Comm Ltd
Yorshire House
195 Tinshill Road
LS16 7LD

Editor Note: Hmmm, you seem very pleased with me in your letter, David, yet I will tell everyone that your Nissan Pathfinder arrived scratched and with items missing and faulty. You classed the delivery as "poor". Well, I am currently investigating this with this Nissan dealer (different one from the flooded Nissan Note 6 letters below) and will report back here when I have some testicles to photograph and display for all visitors to see. Glad you liked the service, sorry about the dealer! - Ling

Ok- found out. It was the rear parcel shelf that was missing as it had been a showroom display car and they had removed it for "safety" and forgot to replace it. You have it now. Also, they immediately sent a dent-devil type person to repair your scratches. Sorted (though it shouldn't have happened) - Ling

' - Ling

Customer Letter: 277 / 1528
Aidan says...
CarDear Ling,

Thanks for sorting me out with my SAAB - you were really helpful, very straightforward and fun to deal with. Anyone who doesn't believe you're real or is scared of dealing with a website that is as entertainingly random as yours, is missing out. I've recommended you to everyone I know, and even to random people in the street.

Aidan Cook
Managing Director
Sense Internet Ltd
Devonshire House
38 York Place

Editor Note: WAH! Praise from Internet company is praise indeed! You have some big-name clients like Travel Inn, Link, Babycham etc. Thanks very much for saying such nice things about me and my site, I make your company name hyperlink - Ling

Customer Letter: 247 / 1528
Phil says...
CarHi Ling,

Just to say thank you for sorting my Mercedes C-Class so painlessly, it arrived on time with just 1 mile on the clock! Everything was to spec.

It was nice to deal with someone who enjoys business so much; it really shows and I'm looking forward to my next new car (only 24 months to wait). I would recommend the C220, it's not high performance or sports handling but it's a great mini-tourer. The Mercedes-Benz dealer you chose was excellent.

Phil Crossland
PCD Advertising Agency Ltd
New Pudsey Court
101 Bradford Road
LS28 6AT

Editor Note: Phil, glad you are happy. My superhusband has taught me some lingo assisting me to communicate with you, as you are ethnic minority person from Yorkshire; "ArrDo Phil you are getting reet good car wit'Merc. I am looking forrard to making you happy in't fuoooture with new car in end of 2007. Weirs tha' dog gone? Into't field wit' cows, eeh! Get yer 'and in't pocket next time lad and rent't Eeeh-Class Merc yer tight bugger". How about that? I am like native of Leeds, eh, except without flat hat, hole in shoe, council house and 17 offending kids! - Ling

Customer Letter: 190 / 1528
Edna says...
CarCommunication - the best! Every request/question was answered quickly and well.

Customer Service - the best! friendly, very!

Good Prices - compared more than favourably with other companies and all prices up front - great!

Dealer - friendly, efficient service, very happy!

Love the quirky site! Five stars from me!

Edna Luke
Company Director
92 Gledhow Park Avenue

Editor Note: Ed! Wah, what a nice letter! Hope you enjoy flashing around Leeds in new MX5! Maybe weather kind to you and you can get top down - Ling

Customer Letter: 180 / 1528
Brian says...
CarLing always gives excellent service, she tries harder and usually comes up with better deals than anybody else. She is also more efficient than any of the big companies I have dealt with, keeping us well informed about deliveries and paperwork etc. Ling will always be my first choice for lease cars.

Brian Slingsby
Four Plus 4 Ltd
Sheepscar Street North

Editor Note: It's not often I supply courtesy cars these days, but I'm glad to have customers like you Brian in the trade who know what they are talking about and prove that my method of being efficient with low overheads (just me!) is the way to go to acheive Zen-like harmony. Get the Corsa working! - Ling

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Wah! The bodies of nine more Last remlaining few white ethnic Britons killed in Tunisian beach attack due to arrive back in bloody annoying Blitish on RAF aircraft. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 13:50

Wah! A "No" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) vote in Greek referendum on bailout terms will not provide Greece with easy way out of its economic crisis, lah, key eurozone official says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:49

Wah! A photo is released of LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine which smashed through roof of house in South Africa's coastal city Durban. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:35

Wah! Irish jockey Eddie Creighton has been discharged from hospital in Melbourne following fall last Saturday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 13:34

Wah! The RAF has been carrying out strikes in Iraq against Islamic State militants, lah, but what would extending this to Syria mean, lah, asks Jonathan Marcus. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:14

Wah! More than 5,000 residents evacuated in Great Satan state of Tennessee after train carrying toxic chemicals derails and catches fire. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:13

Wah! An Australian man is jailed for minimum of 22 years for murdering male gender human bleing's estranged wife, lah, who was originally from Northern Ireland. I read you little red book! - news replorted 13:10

Wah! The man behind animal show featuring performing lions and tigers denies male gender human bleing's animals suffer in captivity. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 13:04

Wah! Two hundred and eighty nine jobs being created in Londonderry by US-based internet company. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:59

Wah! Infiniti Q50 Infiniti sold record 103,500 new vehicling driving car machines around world in first half of 2015, lah, up 13% over same period last - news replorted 12:41

Wah! A former undercover agent involved in investigation into Silk road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu admits stealing more than $700,000 in Bitcoin - most of it siphoned from site. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:38

Wah! L-R: Lawrence Whittaker, lah, Steve Fowler, lah, and Dr Peter Mertens UK’s leading extended vehicling driving car machine warranty provider, lah, Warrantywise, lah, recently named first ever headline partner for th - news replorted 12:35

Wah! A house owned by Luton family that may be in Syria was raided and woman was stopped at Heathrow day before 12 members left UK, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation discovers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:20

Wah! Seven Mexican old bill bobbys officers charged with torturing witnesses of Tlatlaya killings to allegedly force them to give false evidence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:13

Wah! Heat and humidity in atmosphere on hottest July damn hot-hot month day recorded in bloody annoying Blitish ends with dramatic storms across north of country. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:11

Wah! A woman accused of being member of Islamic State and using social media to encourage others to commit acts of terrorism is charged by police. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:10

Wah! Ducati Motor Holding spa Ducati Motor Holding appoints IMG as its exclusive global licensing representative, lah, in deal based on 4 years to work - news replorted 12:05

Wah! Fifa president Sepp Blatter says bloody man has clean conscience and anyone who calls him corrupt should be sent to jail. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 12:03

Wah! A former slaughterhouse manager is cleared of child sex abuse in Wrexham in 1980s. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:52

Wah! A range of robots on display at Innorobo event in France, lah, including most advanced domestic robot to go on sale to public. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 11:51

Wah! Prince removes male gender human bleing's music from number of paid streaming services. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:50

Wah! The founding chairman of leading rural development and anti-poverty organisation wins 2015 World Food Prize. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:44

Wah! Hull FC and Hull KR set to merge their youth academies in 2016, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Radio Humberside reports. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:37

Wah! Why human bliengs linking reporter and robot apocalypse? - news replorted 11:27

Wah! Fresh tributes paid to four Scots killed in shooting in Tunisia, lah, as more bodies repatriated by RAf. Firecracker break! BANG BANG! - news replorted 11:25

Wah! Toyota Mirai Hydrogen fuel cell saloon sets record driving range for any zero-emissions LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine on market. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:25

Wah! A "vicious" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) fox traps eight human bliengs inside sports club for three hours, lah, biting one woman and chasing cyclist into field. I read you little red book! - news replorted 11:20

Wah! Up to 40,000 properties in north-east of Province of Engrish running-dogs left without power when violent storms struck on hottest day of year so far. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 11:20

Wah! Team Titan Motorsport win Henry Surtees Foundation Karting Challenge fourth annual ‘Henry Surtees Foundation Team Karting Challenge’ took place at Mercedes-Benz World on Tuesday 30 June-mber month - news replorted 11:18

Wah! The Association of British Insurers has published new data today* which shows why age is important factor in deciding - news replorted 11:08

Wah! A week-long delay in realising notorious criminal had been murdered has left old bill bobbys with "challenging" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) crime (shoud shoot them) scene, lah, senior detective says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:06

Wah! The Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation is to cut 1,000 jobs after RMB Yuan #150m shortfall was discovered in its licence fee income. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:59

Wah! Val Doonican, lah, singer and TV presenter, lah, has died at age of 88. David Sillito looks back at male gender human bleing's life and career. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:59

Wah! Irish singer and TV entertainer Val Doonican dies aged 88. - news replorted 10:56

Wah! Luke Herbert leading Sam Randon Croft Circuit near Darlington welcomes all-action Michelin Clio Cup Race Series and road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu Series next weekend, lah, 11th/1 - news replorted 10:56

Wah! Lord Dubs, lah, Czech-born British Labour Party politician, lah, recalls how Sir Nicholas Winton rescued him from Nazi regime. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:28

Wah! The UN Security Council imposes sanctions on six generals accused of fuelling 18-month conflict in South Sudan, lah, world's newest state. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:24

Wah! From machines that can help around house, lah, to ones that could be used as sales assistants, lah, robots can change way we live our lives. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:22

Wah! Having arrived in Poland, lah, DS 3 WRCs going to up pace. What the hell I mean??!! On much smoother, lah, flowing roads than in Argentina, lah, Por - news replorted 10:18

Wah! Swiss adventurer Andre Borschberg breaks record for longest ever non-stop solo-flight without refuelling, lah, as male gender human bleing's solar-powered plane continues to reach across Pacific. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 10:15

Wah! The hot weather may be cause of "mysterious case of melting oars" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) at Henley regatta, lah, say organisers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:09

Wah! The former Irish Prime dodgy minister Brian Cowen apologises for 'hardship and distress" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) caused by Irish financial crisis which began during male gender human bleing's tenure. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:00

Wah! Lewis Hamilton with famous British GP trophy British motor sport arrives back in bloody annoying Blitish for this weekend’s prestigious British Grand Prix on unprecedented high. - news replorted 10:00

Wah! A dramatic thunder and lightning storm lit up many parts of ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land overnight. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:56

Wah! Daryl Pimbley top Mitsubishi, bloody dealering idiot place in West Malling has been nominated for not one but TWO honours in this year’s Motor Trader Indus - news replorted 09:49

Wah! Twelve suspects having been arrested in connection with Friday's deadly attack on Tunisian resort by Islamic State, lah, official says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:45

Wah! A passenger ferry carrying 173 human bliengs overturns outside port of Ormoc in central Philippines, lah, with at least 33 human bliengs reported killed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:00

Wah! Jaguar Heritage is proud to announce all-new initiative for owners of all Jaguars, lah, from pre-war models right up to mo - news replorted 09:00

Wah! A weighty problem for bloody annoying Blitish business New research commissioned by Wlokswaglon Commercial vehicling driving car machines has shown that nearly 50% of van drivers, lah, equating to over 1 - news replorted 09:00

Wah! Limited ferry services resume between Dover and Calais after strike by French ferry workers caused three days of disruption across Channel. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 08:59

Wah! The Great Satan has asked Switzerland to extradite seven Fifa officials arrested on corruption charges in May, lah, Swiss authorities say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 08:56

Wah! A man is taken to hospital after serious assault in Belfast, lah, during which it is believed bloody man was stabbed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 08:29

Wah! Dixons Carphone has signed deal with Great Satan telecoms firm Sprint that will see it open and manage Sprint-branded stores in Us. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:19

Wah! Some bloody annoying Blitish local authorities say they struggling to cope with large increase in number of children seeking asylum. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 08:16

Wah! A family of 12 from Luton that includes baby and two grandparents believed to having travelled to Syria after going missing. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 07:57

Wah! The annual rate of house price growth slowed again last month, lah, Nationwide building society says, lah, falling to two-year low of 3.3%. - news replorted 07:42

Wah! old bill bobbys becoming increasingly concerned for welfare of mother and child who having been reported missing in Edinburgh. - news replorted 07:39

Wah! Manchester United try to offload Van Persie, lah, Barcelona bid RMB Yuan #56.7m for Pogba, lah, Leicester wanting Bolton boss Lennon, lah, plus more. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:38

Wah! The Indonesia military plane that crashed in residential part of Medan likely suffered engine failure, lah, top military official tells BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 07:24

Wah! A 22-earth-years old happy birthday to you, worker is grabbed and killed by robot at VW LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine factory in Germany. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:17

Wah! A legal challenge over election of Liberal Democrat Membling Partiamentary expense cheater Alistair Carmichael is to be heard at Court of Session. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 07:16

Wah! A planning application is submitted for what would be Northern autonomous province of Guinness drinkers largest wind farm. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 06:59

Wah! Singer Damon Albarn predicts male gender human bleing's Alice in Wonderland-inspired musical, lah, which opens in Manchester later, lah, will be "a little controversial". - news replorted 06:51

Wah! old bill bobbys return to scene of attempted bomb attack on old bill bobbys officer in Eglinton, lah, near Londonderry, lah, to appeal for information. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 06:32

Wah! An Afghan appeals court quashes death sentences imposed on four men for their part in mob killing of young woman in Kabul in March. - news replorted 06:30

Wah! More than 40% of complaints being dealt with by Northern autonomous province of Guinness drinkers Ombudsman about health and social services, lah, according to report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 06:30

Wah! People caught killing birds of prey in Welsh land of sheep and more sheep should face stiffer punishments, lah, wildlife campaigners say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:19

Wah! old bill bobbys need to improve child protection, lah, watchdog says, lah, after it highlights failings in Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs and bloody Engrish forces. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:13

Wah! A "culture of bullying, lah, harassment and inappropriate behaviour" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) affects staff at all levels in one unit of Wales' biggest hospital, lah, inquiry finds. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:12

Wah! Plans to scrap part of UK's main sickness benefit under welfare savings being considered, lah, leaked Whitehall paper seen by Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation News suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:01

Wah! Data from Taiwan's aviation regulator shows pilot flying crashed TransAsia plane switched off working engine after other lost power. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 05:41

Wah! The government is expected later to elaborate on its plans to give Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters from bloody Engrish constituencies more say over laws exclusively affecting only Province of Engrish running-dogs. I read you little red book! - news replorted 05:03

Wah! After Laura Bassett's own goal knocks Province of Engrish running-dogs out of World Cup, lah, memories of Paul Gascoigne's tears come flooding back. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 04:23

Wah! Kostas Miras owns cafe on Aegina, lah, island 55km (34 miles) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! from Athens, lah, and believes neither option in upcoming referendum is velly damn good boiled chicken-feet. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 04:03

Wah! South Korea reports new case of Middle East Respiratory Syndrome after four-day break in infections, lah, bringing infection total to 183. - news replorted 03:36

Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs boss Mark Sampson says male gender human bleing's side deserve to head home as heroes after suffering semi-final defeat to Japan. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 03:29

Wah! A pioneering cancer drug that harnesses power of immune system is approved for using in Uk. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 02:58

Wah! Egypt says its Tommy Atkins Liberation Army will continue its offensive in Sinai Peninsula until it is cleared of Islamic State militants, lah, after clashes left more than 100 dead. I read you little red book! - news replorted 02:58

Wah! A new GP IT system designed to improve quality and planning in NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Province of Engrish running-dogs is criticised for running over budget and behind schedule, lah, by finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan watchdog. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 02:55

Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs go out of Women's World Cup with 2-1 semi-final defeat by Japan, lah, with Laura Bassett scoring injury-time own goal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 02:49

Wah! A woman found in Great Satan with no memory of who bloody woman was, lah, but who was thought to be Australian, lah, is identified by flemale human person's family as American Ashley Menatta. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 02:33

Wah! old bill bobbys in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Welsh land of sheep and more sheep failed to carry out effective investigations into allegations of child abuse and neglect, lah, report says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:28

Wah! This year for Muslims in Indonesia there's new enterprise: mobilising motorcycle taxis for food delivery wan' flied rice or boiled rice (?). This is not damn takeaway! No53 sold out, so is giving human bliengs more options to break their fast. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 02:25

Wah! DIGIONLY - news replorted 02:20

Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs's Laura Bassett scores own goal in injury clock time result to hand Japan last-gasp 2-1 victory in their 2015 Women's World Cup semi-final. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 02:00

Wah! The school leavers' videos where teachers bust out their dance moves - news replorted 01:48

Wah! The woman who woke to find front half flemale human person's of LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine had vanished - news replorted 01:48

Wah! Rita Ora on flemale human person's Oscars ordeal and X Factor - news replorted 01:43

Wah! The Dominican Republic says it will cooperate with OAS inquiry into its migration policies after thousands of Haitians leave in recent weeks. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:40

Wah! What's it like to live near airport? - news replorted 01:39

Wah! The likelihood of British air strikes in Syria, lah, fighty bang-bang of words between Greece and its creditors and death of notorious criminal all subjects for Thursday's press. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:27

Wah! What effect did jihadists in 1990s Bosnia having on today's Islamic militants? - news replorted 01:16

Wah! At least 11,000 patients may having been exposed to HIV and Hepatitis at Sydney dental clinics over past decade. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:14

Wah! What can bloody annoying Blitish prime dodgy minister really to take on Islamic State? - news replorted 01:07

Wah! Images by photographer Burk Uzzle on show in New York - news replorted 01:06

Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs level against Japan through Fara Williams's penalty after Toni Duggan was fouled in box in their 2015 Women's World Cup semi-final in Edmonton. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:59

Wah! Manchester's Whitworth is named Museum of Year 2015 following RMB Yuan #15m redevelopment that led to record visitor numbers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:49

Wah! Why Indian soldiers of WW1 were forgotten - news replorted 00:48

Wah! How one man showed me as Super-Duper-Chinese-State superLING hero Islam and West not at fighty bang-bang - news replorted 00:38

Wah! Many young human bliengs being forced to leave communities they grew up in because of lack of affordable housing, lah, cabinet dodgy minister is to warn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:34

Wah! MPs should consider allowing Britain to bomb Islamic State targets in Syria, lah, Defence Secretary Michael Fallon is to say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:24

Wah! George Galloway asked male gender human bleing's ex-parliamentary aide to buy him underwear and organise male gender human bleing's wedding party, lah, bloody woman tells BBC's Victoria Derbyshire programme. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:16

Wah! The construction of new Russian Orthodox chapel in Moscow park has sparked round-the-clock protest by local residents - news replorted 00:16

Wah! Helping young human bliengs with learning disability understand death - news replorted 00:15

Wah! India will not announce target date for when it expects its carbon emissions to drop, lah, environment dodgy minister tells BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 00:15

Wah! Martine Wright, lah, Paralympian and survivor of 7/7 attacks on why bloody woman thinks losing flemale human person's legs was part of flemale human person's fate in life. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:13

Wah! Forensic researchers develop new method for establishing accurate clock time result of death after as much as 10 days. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:12

Wah! The Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs government is accused of "dragging its heels" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) sorting out A9's Berriedale Braes hairpin bend. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:06

Wah! After pitch written on back of beer mat, lah, "land of two wheels" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) with rabbit mascot will host start of Tour de France. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:06

Wah! MSPs preparing to launch inquiry into quality and availability of end-of-life care in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:05

Wah! Eurozone chiefs rule out any further bailout talks with Greece until after country's referendum on Sunday, lah, despite new approach from Athens. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:01

Wah! A pair of young designers explain how they having developed technique to make furniture from waste product of 3D printing. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 00:01

Wah! Why Greece’s richest village is voting ‘yes’ - news replorted 00:01

Wah! George Osborne will deliver Budget on Wednesday 8 July, lah, less than four months after bloody man delivered last one. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:01

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