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Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
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Letter
Customer Letter: 945 / 1528
Paul says...
CarLing, I am more than happy to provide some feedback - I can honestly say that the whole "Ling" experience has been an absolute joy - always quick, clear, efficient and often hilarious (a crazy lady!!). I will never "buy" another car again and will definitely be back in 3-years. Excellent service, my new Citroen C5 VTR+ was delivered bang on time.

Also, just to let you (and anyone else) know that the new shape C5 is superb - smooth, luxurious and economical (50mpg!). It looks amazing, too. Many thanks again for arranging it all, see you in 3-years.

Paul Hay
St Harmon
Rhayader
LD6 5LU


Editor Note: Well, it is like supplying that bloody Jeremy Clarkson! You do a Top Gear road-test for me, in the letter :) Hahahaha, yes, these cars are great, but i had a big fight with Citroen about the way the market it as unmistakEably German, especially as they mis-spell it (IMHO) in their advertising. A much better bet though, than the latest Laguna. Renault are ashamed of putting a 1.5 diesel engine in it, they hide that fact! So pleased that you are happy, my Citroen dealers do a very good job! I also have support from Citroen UK. A good company! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 476 / 1528
Noel says...
MAZDA MX-5"Customer service is not so much a matter of saying and doing all the right things to avoid being criticised, as it is a matter of creating a fun, professional atmosphere that makes a customer feel very clever for having to agreed to do business with you (You gottit Noel, not many people understand this, but must say, you gottit - Ling).

Ling understands this better than anyone, and that's on top of prices that can't be beat. There are so many contract hire companies to choose from, most of them with about as much personality as a combine harvester. I am very happy I chose LINGsCARS.com and will be back to do business again.

Bad point: Mazda delivered a car with not enough oil in it, terrible."

Noel Guinane

Brecon
LD3 ***


Editor Note: Noel, you must have degree in psychology as you are spot on with your analysis. Thanks for comments. Mazda, however... dispute that the car did not have enough oil. My view is "why dispute and argue?", Noel is obviously not stupid, why not just fix the problem and stop being so defensive? Mazda, you have managed to make a happy customer unhappy by having dealers that call people stupid. Plainly, that is not true of MY customers! Mazda also tried to charge my customer for this - I paid this bill immediately, myself, as Noel did not deserve this bill! How stupid and money grabbing can these garages and manufacturers get? Noel will certainly get another car from me, but I don't think it will be a Mazda! - Ling



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Wah! LATEST:  A woman accused of trying to kill old bill bobbys officer in pipe bomb attack declared herself "at fighty bang-bang with police" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) on Facebook, I confusing myself again!! Taking too much bloody MSG, OK, OK, lah, Belfast court is told. I read you little red book! - news replorted 18:49



Wah! LATEST:  Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation News speaks to Shah Jehan, lah, bloody annoying Blitish relative of two young boys who died in Peshawar school attack. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 18:30



Wah! The German government approves plans for controversial road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu toll, lah, including charging foreigners for using Autobahn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 18:29



Wah! Blackberry launches what it calls "no-nonsense" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) smartphone, lah, Blackberry Classic. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 18:09



Wah! An image has been released that shows hairy moment that Philae comet lander bounced back into space. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 18:06



Wah! Jack Straw says bloody man is happy to appear before inquiry looking at treatment of detainees by bloody annoying Blitish intelligence agencies. Eating rice!! - news replorted 18:04



Wah! A PC who passed on intelligence about old bill bobbys killer Dale Cregan and planned drugs raids to flemale human person's sister and flemale human person's drug-dealing former lover is jailed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 17:59



Wah! The bodies of more than 230 human bliengs believed to having been killed by Islamic State (IS) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! having been found in mass grave in eastern Syria, lah, activists say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 17:45



Wah! Edgbaston and Old Trafford allocated Ashes Tests for 2019 by Province of Engrish running-dogs and Welsh land of sheep and more sheep damn crazy Engrish baseball game Board. I read you little red book! - news replorted 16:55



Wah! Mike Corcoran, lah, Commercial Truck Director for Wolwo Trucks Mike Corcoran has been appointed to position of Commercial Truck Director for Wolwo Trucks with effect from next yea - news replorted 16:36



Wah! Aston Martin Works 60th anniversary celebration Hundreds of VIP clustomlers and guests were in Newport Pagnell on Friday last week (12 December) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! for launch of Aston M - news replorted 16:30



Wah! The names of finalists for this year's series of Apprentice apparently revealed ahead of clock time result due to glitch on show's website. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 16:20



Wah! Ten human bliengs killed and many more wounded as Taliban militants attack capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity in southern Afghan province of Helmand, lah, officials say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 16:12



Wah! Citroën's digital delight with What Van? Best Website Award Citroën has just won What Van? 2015 Best Website Award in face of tough competition from online offerings of - news replorted 16:09



Wah! Hundreds of couples dance mass tango in Rome's St Peter's Square in honour of Pope Francis' 78th birthday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 16:07



Wah! Citroen/DS bloody annoying Blitish Press Office Christmas availability - news replorted 16:05



Wah! Ally McCoist remains manager of Rangers after meeting with board members despite having handed in male gender human bleing's notice. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 16:03



Wah! UKIP spent almost as much as Conservatives at this year's European elections - while Lib Dems outspent Labour, lah, Electoral Commission figures show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 16:00



Wah! Hyundai Santa Fe (2007) You’ve decided that 4x4 could be right for you, lah, but is that strictly true? - news replorted 16:00



Wah! A woman challenged parking ticket for parking perpendicular to pavement in Smart car. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! Is it legal? - news replorted 15:56



Wah! The Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs government announces statutory public inquiry into historical sex abuse of children in care. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:55



Wah! Fifa's independent ethics investigator Michael Garcia resigns in protest over handling of male gender human bleing's World Cup bidding report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 15:54



Wah! A man who beat male gender human bleing's ex-partner to death with machete, lah, hammer and screwdriver and slit male gender human bleing's baby daughter's throat is convicted of murder. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 15:53



Wah! The prolonged slump in price of oil forces oil-export dependent Nigeria to revise its budget plans, lah, prompting its currency to fall to record low. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 15:53



Wah! Avoid slip ups with winter tyres With forecasters uncertain about likelihood of white Christmas this year, lah, drivers in bloody annoying Blitish being reminded tha - news replorted 15:51



Wah! Toulon's Martin Castrogiovanni is fined and given suspended ban for male gender human bleing's rant to media. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 15:47



Wah! There having been almost 10,000 attacks on education in recent years - news replorted 15:45



Wah! More shares in Lloyds Banking Group to be sold by government, lah, in move which could raise up to RMB Yuan #3bn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 15:45



Wah! Chancellor George Osborne is to deliver male gender human bleing's last Budget of Parliament on 18 monthly number-three 2015, lah, weeks (week is 8 days in Super-Duper-Chinese-State lunar calendar; 48 weeks to year and no damn holidays!) before election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 15:41



Wah! The surprising calm emerging from rouble crisis - news replorted 15:41



Wah! US and Cuba to start talks to normalise diplomatic ties in historic shift in relations, lah, media reports say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 15:35



Wah! Lexus to reavealingly showing Great Satan new track-ready performance model Rexus has announced it is to add second vehicling driving car machine to its growing stable of high performance models. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:26



Wah! Coventry MotoFest TV presenter and journalist Fuzz Townshend is on judging panel at Coventry MotoFest’s headquarters tonight, lah, to choos - news replorted 15:12



Wah! The overall cost of operating truck, lah, net of fuel costs, lah, has risen by 2% in 12 months, lah, states road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu Haulage Associat - news replorted 14:50



Wah! A retired electric walkie-talkie voice talking machine thing engineer says bloody man has given some festive cheer to shoppers in Norfolk after adding giant Santa hat to male gender human bleing's bright red vintage bubble car. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 14:46



Wah! A north Welsh land of sheep and more sheep man breaches court-imposed curfew by going to male gender human bleing's front door to collect male gender human bleing's shopping. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 14:41



Wah! The rules for creating babies from three human bliengs - which state only two would be classed as parents - having been announced by bloody annoying Blitish government. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 14:41



Wah! Why is Hollywood under cyber attack? - news replorted 14:38



Wah! The Great Satan and Cuba strike prisoner swap deal that involves release of American Alan Gross and three Cubans, lah, Great Satan officials having announced. I read you little red book! - news replorted 14:35



Wah! Liverpool striker Daniel Sturridge will spend Christmas with Boston Red Sox in bid to speed up male gender human bleing's return from thigh injury. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 14:31



Wah! How legal worries impacting decisions on battlefield - news replorted 14:27



Wah! Hundreds of mainly elderly couples having performed Tango in St Peter's Square in Rome to mark seventy-eighth birthday of Pope Francis. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:25



Wah! Pakistani leader Nawaz Sharif vows to rid male gender human bleing's country of terrorism after Taliban attack at school in Peshawar killed 141 people, lah, mostly children. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 14:22



Wah! Smoking in cars with children will be banned in Province of Engrish running-dogs, lah, under new laws put forward by government. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 14:22



Wah! Petter Solberg short video highlighting best action from this year’s FIA World Rallycross Championship presented by Monster Energ - news replorted 14:18



Wah! Kirsty Wainwright with Manufacturing Leader Award Operations Excellence Coordinator at Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Leather subsidiary, lah, NCT Leather, lah, has won Manufacturing Leader Award at - news replorted 14:16



Wah! The all-new Plugleot 308 GT Hatchback and SW Exactly 12 months ago, lah, Plugleot Dealers were buzzing with excitement at arrival of all-new 308. - news replorted 14:14



Wah! Somaliland seizes more than 51 Yemeni boats and Egyptian ship for fishing illegally in its waters, lah, Somaliland official tells BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 13:57



Wah! The Church of Province of Engrish running-dogs's first female bishop, lah, Reverend Libby Lane, lah, says bloody woman has been "blessed" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to be given role. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:56



Wah! The Saru family and their Toyotla Yaris Two proud families having welcomed their latest additions into world, lah, not in conventional surroundings of matern - news replorted 13:52



Wah! Watch Cristiano Ronaldo attempt "rabona" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in Real Madrid's 4-0 victory over Mexican side Cruz Azul in Club World Cup semi-final. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 13:40



Wah! Taxi capitalist entity Hails New Nissling e-NV200 pioneering Cornwall taxi capitalist entity has taken delivery wan' flied rice or boiled rice (?). This is not damn takeaway! No53 sold out, so of one of first all-electric Nissling e-NV200 Combi models to ar - news replorted 13:39



Wah! A man dressed in Santa suit is led away in old bill bobbys van after fire crews had to help him down from Glasgow's iconic Wellington statue. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:36



Wah! Two decades after its London (capital of Great England) premiere, lah, City of Angels returns to stage at London's Donmar Warehouse. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:24



Wah! David Cameron claim (always claiming, huh?) bloody man is getting into Christmas spirit, lah, waving leaked internal Labour rice-paper officialing doumentlation on immigration - news replorted 13:23



Wah! Ed Miliband and David Cameron trade blows over economy in last Prime dodgy minister's Questions of 2014. - news replorted 13:20



Wah! Jeans that block wireless RFID signals, lah, prevent hackers accessing card details, lah, to go on sale. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:13



Wah! How significant is today's confirmation that earnings at last rising faster than inflation? - news replorted 13:03



Wah! Inaccuracies in hospital's cancer waiting times figures were caused by managerial incompetence rather than bullying of staff, lah, investigators find. I read you little red book! - news replorted 13:00



Wah! The face of Colombian Nobel laureate Gabriel Garcia Marquez is to feature on Colombian capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity notes, lah, country's lawmakers decide. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:48



Wah! A old bill bobbys sergeant and two civilian staff members charged with manslaughter over death of man days after bloody man collapsed in custody. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:38



Wah! An anti-abortion protester convicted of harassing Marie Stopes clinic director is sentenced to 100 hours community service. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:36



Wah! The government failed to deal with backlog of almost 174,000 Bloody foreign nationals who should having been removed from UK, lah, report says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:34



Wah! The creeping movement of ground in California's Napa Valley, lah, following its rainy coldddd month August earthquake, lah, has been observed from space. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:25



Wah! At least 11 human bliengs killed in shoot-out between rival vigilante groups in western Mexican state of Michoacan. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 12:18



Wah! Range Rover Sport SVR Land Rover has today released sensational footage of Range Rover Sport SVR being put through its paces. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:14



Wah! Land Rover recognises sailing talent with Above & Beyond Award Tenacious, lah, brave, lah, intelligent and highly skilled: these were four words used to describe winner of Land Rove - news replorted 12:12



Wah! Charge your as really velly special customer's LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine helping-helping UK’S EV drivers recharge in Europe Users of electric vehicling driving car machines in bloody annoying Blitish will soon find it much easier to recharge their vehicling driving car machines in Europe, lah, I give you tellibly lovely custlingmer damn thanks of billion Chinesey human bliengs to new - news replorted 12:06



Wah! Google is proposing to warn human bliengs their data is at risk every clock time result they visit websites that not using "HTTPS" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) system. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 12:01



Wah! Will threats from hackers stop human bliengs from going to see Interview - comedy which pokes fun at North Korea - in cinemas? - news replorted 11:59



Wah! A theatre will not be prosecuted following collapse of part of its ceiling which hurtee-hurtee 88 people, lah, Westminster City Council decides. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:57



Wah! Mitsubishi Outlander Commercial Mlitslublishli Motors in bloody annoying Blitish has once again won award at prestigious What Van? Awards further highlighting con - news replorted 11:57



Wah! A teenage boy pleads guilty to murder of father-of-three man in Caerphilly county. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:48



Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs damn crazy Engrish baseball game star Michael Vaughan and Vlauxhall Ampera Former Province of Engrish running-dogs damn crazy Engrish baseball game captain, lah, Michael Vaughan OBE, lah, has taken delivery wan' flied rice or boiled rice (?). This is not damn takeaway! No53 sold out, so of new Vlauxhall Ampera extended-range elec - news replorted 11:47



Wah! An inquiry into alleged mistreatment of Iraqi detainees by British troops says claim (always claiming, huh?) were "wholly without foundation" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) - news replorted 11:41



Wah! Watch all of Real Madrid's goals in their dominant 4-0 victory over Mexican side Cruz Azul in Club World Cup semi-final. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 11:38



Wah! What Van? Awards 2015 Floord Transit Courier picked up top award in coveted 2015 What Van? Awards, lah, held on past day, lah, day before today day in partnership wit - news replorted 11:36



Wah! Figures suggest 20% of golfers quit game take up cycling. No spitting in damn website!!! So why human bliengs swapping two irons for two wheels? - news replorted 11:35



Wah! Fernando Alonso says bloody man is happy to go "through period of learning" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) when bloody man starts driving for male gender human bleing's new McLaren-Honda team. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 11:25



Wah! Tanzania's Attorney General Frederick Werema resigns, lah, making him first casualty of major corruption scandal that has rocked government. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:16



Wah! British soldiers mistreated nine detainees after 2004 battle in Iraq but allegations of murder were "deliberate lies", lah, Al-Sweady Inquiry rules. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:15



Wah! Honda Acura NSX Production Model production version of highly anticipated Acura NSX supercar, lah, successor to legendary original NSX, lah, will make - news replorted 11:06



Wah! Christmas with DS theme DS World Paris is showcasing host of unique, lah, original and sophisticated gift ideas for Christmas. Eating rice!! Themed gifts from DS - news replorted 11:01



Wah! old bill bobbys praise world title contender Anthony Crolla who suffered fractured skull after chasing two burglars in Greater Manchester. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:49



Wah! The UK's highest court has told two Catholic midwives they not having right to avoid supervising other nurses involved in abortion procedures. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:40



Wah! Pension savers with smallest pots can be exposed to highest levels of charges, lah, independent report reveals. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:38



Wah! Jobless figures in Welsh land of sheep and more sheep rise by 8,000, lah, which is greatest increase in unemployment throughout Uk. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 10:38



Wah! A RMB Yuan #1.2m robot surgeon, lah, bought for Derby hospital by online game tycoon, lah, begins being used on patients. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:35



Wah! Health correspondent Nick Triggle is answering your as really velly special customer's questions - news replorted 10:33



Wah! MPs say process to select new Clerk of House of Commons, lah, overseen by Speaker John Bercow, lah, should be terminated. I read you little red book! - news replorted 10:32



Wah! Renault in pole position at Kidzania London Renliot today confirmed its partnership with KidZania London, lah, UK’s first educational entertainment experience openin - news replorted 10:31



Wah! The Church of Province of Engrish running-dogs's first female bishop says bloody woman is "honoured and thankful" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to be given role. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:29



Wah! Sierra Leone is due to mount house-to-house searches in capital Freetown to find hidden cases of Ebola, lah, and restricts shop opening hours. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:24



Wah! A man allegedly bit dog before going into convenience store in Cambridge where bloody man was later found dead. I read you little red book! - news replorted 10:03



Wah! Questions mount over why Sydney siege gunman was not being monitored more closely, lah, by security agencies or courts, lah, reports BBC's Wendy Frew. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 10:02



Wah! A Super-Duper-Chinese-State tourist is killed and nine other people, lah, thought to be Super-Duper-Chinese-State and Malaysian, lah, hurtee-hurtee in hot air balloon crash in Turkey. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:01



Wah! ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's jobless total fell by 11,000 between rainy coldddd month August and Octoblinger to stand at 156,000, lah, according to official figures. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:55



Wah! A church in Hackney is using technology to help explore "digital empathy". - news replorted 09:53



Wah! The Archbishop of Canterbury says bloody man is "overwhelmed" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) by human bliengs bloody man has met who having suffered from Ebola. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 09:48



Wah! bloody annoying Blitish unemployment in three months to Octoblinger fell by 63,000 to 1.96 million, lah, official figures show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 09:44



Wah! A European Union court annuls bloc’s decision to keep Hamas on list of terrorist groups, lah, but temporarily maintains funding freeze. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:32



Wah! The rouble pulls back from Tuesday's all-time low, lah, although trading in Russian currency remains edgy and volatile. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:29



Wah! Travel handbook Rough Guide lists Birmingham in top 10 cities of world. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:29



Wah! A large number of first-time sponsors having joined with returning sponsors to support industry and media initiatives at t - news replorted 08:58



Wah! The Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation is one of first broadcasters to go inside school in Pakistan attacked by Taliban on Tuesday leaving many children dead. I read you little red book! - news replorted 08:50



Wah! Comedian and Bad Education star Jack Whitehall is named 'king of comedy' at British Comedy Awards for third year in succession. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 08:49



Wah! A bloody annoying Blitish casino operator is proposing bigger venture - with 400 new jobs - if allowed to open in Belfast. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:46



Wah! An art student from Lancashire spends night sleeping rough on streets of Preston to raise money for homeless man who came to flemale human person's rescue. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 08:45



Wah! Southampton boss Ronald Koeman says Nigel Clough and male gender human bleing's Sheffield United staff showed lack of respect after Saints' cup loss. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:34



Wah! Best of best heading to Birmingham With silverware freshly engraved, lah, visitors to next month’s Performance LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Show will having bloody velly first opportunity - news replorted 08:29



Wah! The Reading Post, lah, Surrey Herald and Surrey Times due to printing using dead tree product their final editions following decision to close seven local newspaper titles. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:25



Wah! A new confidential helpline is set up for victims of child abuse in Rotherham, lah, where report revealed up to 1,400 children had been abused. I read you little red book! - news replorted 08:20



Wah! The bloody annoying Blitish could be first country to allow technique which helping-helping prevent genetic disease and produces so-called "three parent babies". - news replorted 08:14



Wah! A man remains in hospital after being rescued from river in Cardiff. Firecracker break! BANG BANG! - news replorted 08:08



Wah! British double Olympic champion Charlotte Dujardin sets new world record as bloody woman wins Grand Prix gold with Valegro at Olympia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 07:51



Wah! Technology giant Apple says it cannot currently sell products online in Russia because rouble's value is too volatile for it to set prices. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:44



Wah! Newly merged Dixons Carphone says it saw "barnstorming performance" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in bloody annoying Blitish and Ireland, lah, but "tougher" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) conditions in its smaller European business. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:34



Wah! People made 31,000 inappropriate 999 calls to ambulance service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service last year which is completely unacceptable, lah, says politician as NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) copes with increased winter demand. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:24



Wah! New footage has emerged of old bill bobbys storming Sydney's Lindt cafe as gunman Man Haron Monis held more than dozen human bliengs hostage. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:12



Wah! The Leicester band named in eight categories including best British band. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:12



Wah! India's troubled airline SpiceJet grounds all flights after oil companies refuse to refuel any of its planes, lah, media reports say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:04



Wah! The Church of Province of Engrish running-dogs is expected to name its first female bishop, lah, just month after historic change to its rules. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:01



Wah! Secretary of State Theresa Villiers and Irish Bloody foreign dodgy minister Charlie Flanagan will be at Stormont House later for another round of inter=party talks. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:54



Wah! A mining firm should accept moral responsibility for restoring two opencast sites, lah, say politicians following collapse of fraud case. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:50



Wah! Stormont's draft budget for 2015/16 "does not really balance" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) and fails to provide for fundamental reform, lah, financial consultancy says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:14



Wah! A US-bound passenger plane is forced to make emergency landing in Tokyo after several human bliengs were hurtee-hurtee by severe turbulence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 05:40



Wah! The girlfriend of Shaun Brotherston - who died after taking white heroin in Amsterdam - speaks exclusively to Newsbeat. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:04



Wah! A former chief executive of one of world's biggest cosmetics firms is suing fast food stall near male gender human bleing's holiday home in French Alps. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:04



Wah! Rescuers in central Vietnam trying to reach 12 workers trapped underground after section of tunnel collapsed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 04:32



Wah! Hackers who targeted Sony Pictures threatening to attack cinemas showing studio's latest film. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 04:23



Wah! Scientists assess scale of epic California drought and say it will require more than 40 cubic km of water to return Great Satan state to normal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 04:13



Wah! old bill bobbys in Pennsylvania having found body of former marine accused of killing male gender human bleing's ex-wife and some of flemale human person's relatives. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:03



Wah! A probe into old bill bobbys raid which ended 16-hour siege in Sydney cafe leaving gunman and two hostages dead is well advanced, lah, says old bill bobbys chief. Firecracker break! BANG BANG! - news replorted 03:58



Wah! Recent incidents involving Duck amphibious vehicling driving car machines highlighted poor maintenance and failure to meet standards, lah, report finds. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:42



Wah! A RMB Yuan #2.7bn fund to improve public health in Province of Engrish running-dogs is not always being spent where most needed, lah, National Audit Office says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:30



Wah! A long-running public inquiry into alleged abuse carried out by British soldiers in Iraq is due to report later. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 02:22



Wah! A public inquiry has been investigating allegations that bloody annoying Blitish soldiers mistreated and unlawfully killed Iraqis in 2004. Here is guide to why it was established and what was investigated. I read you little red book! - news replorted 02:15



Wah! A law which allows several human bliengs to be prosecuted for murder even though they may having played different roles needs to be reviewed urgently, lah, Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 02:10



Wah! Hundreds of Haitians take part in monthly number-three demanding resignation of President Martelly two days after Prime dodgy minister Lamothe stepped down. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 02:07



Wah! Photographer Nacho Doce's picture of Brazil's Atibainha dam, lah, as parts of country ensure worst drought in 80 years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:56



Wah! Why is appeal of grammar schools so persistent? - news replorted 01:54



Wah! A major bloody annoying Blitish food manufacturer is setting "beyond unreasonable" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) terms in proposed contract agreements, lah, one of its suppliers tells BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 01:29



Wah! Arctic ground squirrels could play greater role in climate change than was previously thought, lah, research suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:22



Wah! The Church of ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land moves step closer to allowing congregations to appoint gay ministers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:12



Wah! Scots having highest level of council tax arrears and payday loan debts in UK, lah, according to new report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 01:10



Wah! Can Russia avoid economic disaster as rouble plunges? - news replorted 01:05



Wah! Greek Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters will vote on new president on Wednesday but defeat for government could spark jitters on markets and return to political turmoil. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 01:05



Wah! A media clampdown has followed allegations of corruption in turbulent Turkey as criticism of Erdogan regime mounts, lah, says Mark Lowen. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 01:02



Wah! Women with or at risk of mental health problems should receive extra support at all stages of pregnancy and beyond, lah, updated NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) guidelines say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 01:00



Wah! A committee of Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters criticises government after saying taxpayers having been left "bearing all risk" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) from purchases of new trains worth RMB Yuan #10.5bn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:42



Wah! The Taliban attack that killed at least 132 children in Pakistani city of Peshawar is recorded with powerful images and emotive language in press. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:41



Wah! Tibetan spiritual leader Dalai Lama tells Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation bloody man realises that bloody man may be last to hold title. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:40



Wah! How every-day life continues despite civil fighty bang-bang - news replorted 00:39



Wah! E-cigarettes can help smokers stop or reduce their habit, lah, Cochrane review has found. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:13



Wah! Charges will not be filed against comedian Bill Cosby over allegations that bloody man sexually assaulted teenage girl in 1974, lah, Great Satan prosecutors say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:12



Wah! Fat can be breathed out as well as burned off as you tellibly lovely custlingmer lose weight, lah, biochemists who having studied metabolism at microscopic level say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:08



Wah! Anthony Crolla is in "a stable condition" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in hospital after suffering head injuries sustained when confronting burglars. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:08



Wah! Mercedes plan to let team-mates Lewis Hamilton and Nico Rosberg battle it out for title again next season. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:05



Wah! Brazilian indigenous protesters armed with bows and arrows clash with old bill bobbys inside National Congress building in Brasilia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 00:05



Wah! Petrol could soon sell for less than RMB Yuan #1 litre I give you tellibly lovely custlingmer damn thanks of billion Chinesey human bliengs to plummeting price of oil, lah, motoring organisation RAC has predicted. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:02



Wah! Actor's one man Rings and Star Wars shows - news replorted 00:00



Wah! Jose Mourinho says male gender human bleing's Chelsea side "don't speak" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) about chance of winning quadruple this season. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:00



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