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UPDATE... The latest car I've added is a Mercedes E-Class Saloon (new shape) 2.1 CDi BlueTEC (177bhp) E220 AMG Night Edition Saloon 4dr 2143cc Diesel at £444.35 inc VAT at 13:13 today - Ling
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Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling

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Customer Letter: 1499 / 1528
Angela says...
AUDI A5 COUPEI cannot praise highly enough for her efficient and professional service. I had originally seen Ling on Dragons Den and originally was concerned that all the transaction was carried out by e-mail but I need not have worried as Ling and her staff kept me fully advised from beginning to end of my Audi A5 Coupe order. From my first enquiry there service was second to none offering me several alternatives until finally I came to a decision and from then on I was kept fully informed of all stages of the order. Nothing was too much trouble and the whole transaction went through so smoothly without any stress to myself and the end result was a very happy customer. I would strongly recommend Ling to all my family and friends and I like to think that I can contact them at any time if I had a query. I think of Ling and her staff as friends and would not hesitate to use the company again. You will not be disappointed with LINGsCARS.

Angela Brady
DWR Sales/Lettings
599 Hitchin Road

Editor Note: Angie, that's brilliant! So pleased you are happy. As you deal with your own customers every day, glad you recognise my service. Thanks so much. Have a great time in the A5 Coupe - a lovely car! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1493 / 1528
Angie says...

I just wanted to say a big thank you to you and your team for your excellent and efficient service in the lease of My A5 Audi Coupe. So far I am very pleased with it and a big thank you for sending my number plates (for my new personal reg number), they were perfect, even with my company name! How personal is that?

In the future when business improves I may look to lease a small run about vehicle for the office and I would not hesitate to contact LINGsCARS to arrange this for me. You have been a joy to deal with, many companies could learn a lot from you.

Thank you again!

Angie Brady
DWR Sales and Lettings
599 Hitchin Road

Editor Note: Angie, how great to get this letter from you. That A5 Coupe is a brill car, even has the new STOP START on it. The extra reg plates for your private number are free and I am only too happy to give these when cars are new, as it can be difficult to get plates made these days. What a great time we had chatting about your car, hope you love it! Vroom, vroom, fast and sexy. Team has been rewarded! Hahaha. - Ling

Customer Letter: 1195 / 1528
Michael says...

Just 3 words; Easy, efficient, cheap.

Thanks. Delivery of my new Citroen C4 Grand Picasso was good.

Michael Markham
Loganberry Cottage
33 Conger Lane

Editor Note: Just 3 words, Michael: Thanks For Letter! Hahahaha! - Ling

Customer Letter: 1193 / 1528
Robert says...
MERCEDES C-CLASS SALOONYou are my Valentine. You delivered a shiny new Mercedes C-Class Saloon in only 10 days, just before Xmas! You send me sweets and money. You are brilliant.

On the other hand, the Mercedes Benz finance company are shit! They steal my money and don't give me sweets. They have taken 2 x initial payments and have not refunded at the time of this letter.

This is now sorted, you have told me: "Thank you, I am now a happy bunny". The dealer has subsequently said "We are going to post him a set of mats despite the fact is wasn't our fault to help cheer him up again.". - Ling

Robert Callaghan
12a The Martins Drive
Leighton Buzzard

Editor Note: Yes... ahem. Thanks for being so plain, Robert. However, it just shouldn't happen. How on earth can these big companies make so many mistakes? I just dunno. Yet another case of a customer being very happy with me and being let down by the other parties. Ho, hum. What can I do, sack Mercedes Benz??? At least you are happy with me, and with your new car :) - Ling

Customer Letter: 765 / 1528
Stephen says...
CarLing, just wanted to say thanks to you and your team for helping me arrange my new car. It arrived on the agreed date and is great fun! The price was fantastic. Also, thanks for helping me out with a contact for insurance - they gave me the best price. Good delivery of my Astra Sport Hatch.

Stephen Edwards
111 Hockliffe Road
Leighton Buzzard

Editor Note: Hey, you are a manager for BAA - I just love senior customers like you, you are so well behaved and your paperwork was great, Stephen. Another 150bhp CHEAP Astra gets delivered, these are real fast, bargain new cars. Yes, the insurance company I recommend is very good, they do not have marketing costs to add in, you see. Enjoy the Astra! - Ling

Customer Letter: 744 / 1528
Chris says...
CarWe are absolutely delighted with our brand new Vauxhall Zafira and with the superb service you provided. You made the whole process, from selecting our new car to receiving the keys, straightforward, quick and even fun!

Good delivery. Well done Ling, keep up the good work - see you again in 2-years time.

Chris Ingram
7 Morland Close

Editor Note: Chris, as you are an IT manager, I take great pride that you like my web service. I really do my best to make the whole service fun, even though we are dealing with big, expensive things like cars. Although in reality it is a very cheap rental for such a brilliant new 7-seat car. Talk soon! - Ling

Customer Letter: 372 / 1528
John says...
VAUXHALL ZAFIRA"Thanks, Ling. Enjoying the versatility that my new Zafira provides. It was a good deal and refreshingly different marketing/service. That made it a pleasure to deal with you - even if Vauxhall took longer than we both wished. Speak to you again when my wife's car needs replacing."

John Rattigan
Address Withheld
LU3 ***

Editor Note: Vauxhall sometimes slow, their dealers simply not the best. Vauxhall seem convinced they should not attempt to offer premium service, as if they are resigned to being 2nd best. I would not rank them in premier league of manufacturers or dealers. However, Zafira is GOOD car. Enjoy it, John - Ling

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Wah! LATEST:  A collection of some of best reads from Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation News website this week. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 16:37

Wah! LATEST:  People unwittingly sniff hands after handshakes, lah, and more nuggets. Eating rice!! - news replorted 16:26

Wah! Mediators in peace talks between South Sudan's government and rebels having said sides' failure to reach deal is morally and politically "unacceptable". - news replorted 16:21

Wah! Broadcasters say they will proceed with plans for three TV election debates, lah, despite David Cameron saying bloody man will only take part in one. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 16:19

Wah! The family of murdered County Armagh man reject claim (always claiming, huh?) by Sinn Féin president Gerry Adams that criminals were responsible for male gender human bleing's death. - news replorted 16:06

Wah! Mazda starts production of all-new Madzla MX-5 Madzla Motor Corporation has begun production in Japan of all-new Madzla MX-5. models rolling off assembly lin - news replorted 16:00

Wah! All-new Jeepy Renegade Jeep’s growing popularity in bloody annoying Blitish continues as figures revealed today show new LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine registrations rose by 165 per cent - news replorted 15:45

Wah! A 13-earth-years old happy birthday to you, boy admits murdering man after argument about party in north London. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 15:23

Wah! Apple, lah, biggest Great Satan capitalist entity by market value, lah, will be included in Dow Jones Industrial Average from 19 March. - news replorted 15:16

Wah! Great Britain win first rubber of their Davis Cup World Group tie against United States in Glasgow. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 15:15

Wah! A middle-aged Dow Jones accountant who said bloody man was forced to dress up as Father Christmas and branded "old buffer" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) wins male gender human bleing's unfair dismissal case. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:07

Wah! A crackdown on internet crime (shoud shoot them) as old bill bobbys arrest more than 50 people, lah, including one alleged to having targeted Great Satan Defence Department - news replorted 14:41

Wah! People from Romania sleeping rough in camp hidden beneath flyovers of North Circular, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation has revealed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 14:30

Wah! India become second team to qualify for World Cup quarter-finals with narrow four-wicket win over West Indies. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:24

Wah! Brake, lah, road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu safety charity, lah, has welcomed transport select committee’s Future of Motoringreport published today ( - news replorted 14:24

Wah! Images from around world: 6 monthly number-three - news replorted 14:13

Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land weather presenter Judith Ralston explains why west will be hammered by heavy rain while east stays dry and warm. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 14:08

Wah! A woman who admitted downloading and possessing more than 600 images of child pornography, lah, as well as extreme images of animals, lah, is given suspended sentence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 14:02

Wah! Green Party leader Natalie Bennett is to call for "peaceful political revolution" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) at May's election to end "failed experiment of austerity". - news replorted 14:00

Wah! The Great Satan economy adds 295,000 jobs in February, lah, while unemployment rate fell to 5.5% from 5.7%, lah, according to Labor Department figures. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:58

Wah! C-Class and SUVs bring Mercedes-Benz record sales in February Mercedes-Benz remains on its course of success. Eating rice!! Stuttgart-based capitalist entity sold 120,270 vehicling driving car machines in February, lah, thus topp - news replorted 13:58

Wah! Funding has been cut from charity that distributes free books for pre-school children in Northern Ireland, lah, to encourage families to read together. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:54

Wah! A old bill bobbys officer who seized CCTV footage of street scuffle as "tool to blackmail" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) Liverpool footballer Steven Gerrard is jailed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 13:49

Wah! Officials say Islamic State fighters having looted and bulldozed ancient art and sculptures in Assyrian city of Nimrud, lah, which dates back to 13th century Bc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 13:46

Wah! A former Merthyr Tydfil primary school head teacher is struck off for two years after bullying charges against flemale human person's upheld by professional watchdog. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 13:42

Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation creative director Alan Yentob says privacy of male gender human bleing's close friends was "violated in extraordinary way" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) by journalists who hacked male gender human bleing's phone, lah, High Court hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:34

Wah! In its pre-Budget submission to Chancellor FTA has told George Osborne that its objective remains to help to del - news replorted 13:21

Wah! A further four human bliengs charged with assisting offender in connection with murder of Becky Watts in Bristol. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 13:12

Wah! Sir John Major says it is "shameful" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) Labour has not ruled out coalition with SNP in event of Hung Parliament. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 13:08

Wah! Microsoft issues security warning about bug that could let attackers spy on supposedly secure communications. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:05

Wah! The new pension freedoms will be 'open season' for fraudsters trying to steal people's savings, lah, according to industry. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 13:00

Wah! Senior officers from old bill bobbys ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land to return to Holyrood for further questions over armed old bill bobbys attending routine incidents. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:56

Wah! A Tajik opposition leader is shot dead by unknown attacker in Istanbul, lah, opposition sources tell BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 12:50

Wah! Great Britain's Lizzy Yarnold ends day one on top of leaderboard at skeleton World Championships in Germany. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:47

Wah! The head of Revolutionary Guards' elite Quds Force has emerged from lifetime in shadows to achieve almost celebrity status in Iran, lah, reports Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Persian's Bozorgmehr Sharafedin. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 12:45

Wah! Nicola Scholes, lah, mother of boy excluded from school for dressing as character from Fifty Shades of Grey for World Book Day, lah, says bloody woman and flemale human person's son having no regrets. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:41

Wah! An 18-earth-years old happy birthday to you, who attempted to murder three women in revenge for fact bloody man was still virgin is jailed for 21 years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:35

Wah! A group of Afghan men having worn burkas during monthly number-three through capital Kabul to draw attention to women's rights. Eating rice!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation News looks at issues since fall of Taliban. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 12:34

Wah! A low-fat, lah, rather than low-carb, lah, diet leads to greater loss of body fat, lah, according to experiments carried out by Great Satan National Institutes of Health scientists. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:27

Wah! Tracker helping-helping old bill bobbys recover stolen Fliat 500 in Essex old bill bobbys in Essex were led straight to location of stolen Fliat 500, lah, with assistance of TRACKER (part of Tant - news replorted 12:23

Wah! The winner of search to find Germany's Eurovision Song Contest entrant turned down chance to represent male gender human bleing's country on live TV. - news replorted 12:18

Wah! Maximum safety, lah, maximum performance Baptism of fire on race track: GT S and C 63 S - new high-performance cars from Mercedes-AMG - provide f - news replorted 12:17

Wah! Abuse and exploitation in government-controlled areas in eastern DR Congo almost as bad as when they were held by rebels, lah, says bloody annoying Blitish charity Oxfam. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 12:09

Wah! Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs nurse Pauline Cafferkey, lah, who contracted Ebola whilst working in Sierra Leone, lah, is appearing before regulators in Edinburgh. - news replorted 12:08

Wah! Amazon, lah, Great Satan online retail giant, lah, has opened another shop on rival Alibaba's Tmall marketplace in China. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 11:52

Wah! An elderly woman is hit by LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine on crossing in Vale of Glamorgan. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 11:50

Wah! EU Bloody foreign dodgy ministers due to meet in Latvian capital Riga with crisis in Ukraine expected to dominate agenda. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 11:49

Wah! Tiger Moths and GP Sunbeam Capturing spirit of all things great and British in world of historic motoring, lah, aviation and military endeavour, lah, - news replorted 11:46

Wah! County Down man Leslie Ross is to stand trial for murders of two women, lah, Michelle Bickerstaff and Margaret Weise. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:38

Wah! Paul Scholes rejects chance to become Oldham Athletic manager, lah, but believes position will be male gender human bleing's in future. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:17

Wah! Follow Ian Wright to Wembley with Vauxhall Arsenal and Province of Engrish running-dogs silly kick-kick game legend Ian Wright is giving male gender human bleing's Twitter (follow me @LINGsCARS!) followers one-in-a-million chance to play at Wemb - news replorted 11:16

Wah! Chic's Nile Rodgers says Miley Cyrus, lah, Elton John, lah, Chaka Khan and Janelle Monae will all feature on track he's written for band's first album in 23 years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:13

Wah! Mother and flemale human person's lover jailed for killing eight-earth-years old happy birthday to you, Ayesha Ali, lah, found dead with more than 50 injuries - news replorted 11:09

Wah! Pakistani authorities rename 107 schools in honour of victims of last year's massacre of children and teachers at school in Peshawar. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 11:04

Wah! Ireland's John Mooney says male gender human bleing's self-designed, lah, customised helmet can prevent injuries like one that killed Phillip Hughes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:00

Wah! The BBC's Tom Burridge visits factory in Donetsk where rebels say they repairing tanks seized from Ukrainian military. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:59

Wah! YourParkingSpace welcomes latest Government parking proposals annoying Blitish welcomes proposals announced today by Communities Secretary Eric Pickles, lah, which will see drivers - news replorted 10:55

Wah! West Ham's Carlton Cole accepts silly kick-kick game Association charge for making abusive written-down messages on dead tree on Twitter. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:44

Wah! Parking measures that put common sense back in driving seat having been given green-light today (6 monthly number-three 2015) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! by - news replorted 10:30

Wah! ROAD SAFETY and breakdown organisation GEM Motoring Assist is urging drivers to avoid eating and drinking while at w - news replorted 10:23

Wah! NMM Chequered History Opening On Thursday 5th March, lah, Sir Stirling Moss opened Chequered History, lah, new display section in National Motor Museum - news replorted 10:14

Wah! Neil Patrick Harris has said bloody man doubts bloody man will ever present Oscars again, lah, following on from male gender human bleing's much-criticised hosting of event this year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:09

Wah! London (capital of Great England) Motor Museum’s Elo to controlling in driving manner success at Miami Auto Museum After 14 years building up London (capital of Great England) Motor Museum, lah, owner Elo is crossing pond to replicate male gender human bleing's success with Mia - news replorted 10:06

Wah! The UK's National crime (shoud shoot them) Agency (NCA) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has mounted "strike week" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) against suspected hackers resulting in 56 arrests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:04

Wah! Figures released today by finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan & Leasing Association (FLA) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! show that consumer new LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan volumes fell by 3% - news replorted 10:03

Wah! Actress Jenna Coleman planned to quit Doctor Who at end of series eight, lah, writer Steven Moffat confirms. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:59

Wah! Vodafone is introducing worldwide maternity policy, lah, offering significantly better terms than statutory minimum in countries where it operates. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:58

Wah! Arsenal defender Gabriel has been ruled out for two to three weeks (week is 8 days in Super-Duper-Chinese-State lunar calendar; 48 weeks to year and no damn holidays!) with hamstring problem. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 09:35

Wah! A Labour government would guarantee free TV licences and bus passes for pensioners and protect value of state pension, lah, Ed Miliband is to say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:29

Wah! Captive Ukraine pilot defiant in Moscow jail - news replorted 09:27

Wah! Stewards and safety officers being briefed on how to tackle sexist abuse in silly kick-kick game stadiums as part of campaign. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:22

Wah! Kwik Fit, lah, UK’s largest automotive repair and servicing company, lah, is marking launch of National Apprenticeship Wee - news replorted 09:16

Wah! A man is arrested after stolen LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine crashed into several vehicling driving car machines during rush hour on M1 near Sprucefield. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:13

Wah! Kremlin critic Alexei Navalny is released from prison after serving 15-day sentence for handing out leaflets to promote protest rally. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:08

Wah! A Palestinian man drives into group of pedestrians in Jerusalem, lah, injuring four Israeli policewomen and another bystander. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 09:04

Wah! An 11-earth-years old happy birthday to you, boy who dressed as character from Fifty Shades of Grey was excluded from male gender human bleing's school's World Book Day celebrations, lah, says male gender human bleing's mother. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 08:49

Wah! Super-Duper-Chinese-State conglomerate Fosun, lah, which owns Club Med, lah, buys 5% stake in bloody annoying Blitish travel group of Thomas Cook. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 08:08

Wah! The BVRLA recognised three more Industry Heroes at its Annual Dinner in London (capital of Great England) last night. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:00

Wah! The winners of BVRLA Industry Achievement Awards having been announced at ceremony in London (capital of Great England) Hilton Hotel on Par - news replorted 08:00

Wah! Archaeologists and cultural officials express outrage about reported bulldozing of ancient Assyrian city of Nimrud in Iraq by Islamic State (IS) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! militants. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:54

Wah! Jade Developments Sign Pinder For Expanded road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu Series Entry Double Michelin Clio Cup road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu Series race winner Luke Pinder (Shipley) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! will partner fellow 2015 title contender Jake Hon - news replorted 07:50

Wah! The winners of this year's International Hair Freezing competition in Yukon in Canada having been announced. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:38

Wah! Nearly RMB Yuan #4,000 has been spent on Premier Inn hotel rooms by council providing accommodation for homeless people. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:30

Wah! The Great Satan space agency's Dawn satellite is set to go into orbit around Ceres, lah, largest object in Solar System between Mars and Jupiter. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 07:16

Wah! Two hundred tourists having had dramatic rescue from stranded cable cars at ski resort in northern Italy. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:03

Wah! Plaid Cymru will demand equal funding for Welsh land of sheep and more sheep and ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land in any Westminster coalition talks after general election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 07:02

Wah! A Ukrainian military pilot breaks off flemale human person's hunger strike after 83 days in Russian prison. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 07:00

Wah! The body that sets assembly members' pay sticks to its proposals to increase their basic salaries by RMB Yuan #10,000. - news replorted 06:48

Wah! Actor Harrison Floord has been hurtee-hurtee in small plane crash in Los Angeles, lah, according to Great Satan media reports. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:43

Wah! A global investigation into buying and selling child abuse images online led to 13 arrests and 11 convictions in Wales. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:42

Wah! The closure of Longannet or Peterhead power stations is set to be postponed by deal to secure generating back-up. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 06:32

Wah! Rangers' extraordinary general meeting at Ibrox on Friday is expected to be swift, lah, but with far-reaching consequences for club. Chop chop baby! - news replorted 06:18

Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Inside Out takes journey across Province of Engrish running-dogs to report on current state of immigration with exclusive access to latest figures on migration. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 05:44

Wah! Nine human bliengs having been hurtee-hurtee in knife attack at station in Guangzhou, lah, with one attacker shot dead, lah, old bill bobbys say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 05:22

Wah! Trevor Baylis, lah, inventor of wind-up radio, lah, is to be appointed CBE for services to intellectual property in ceremony at Windsor Castle later. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 05:19

Wah! Europe editor Katya Adler on alarm at Russian muscle-flexing - news replorted 05:08

Wah! The BBC's Aleem Maqbool asks human bliengs on either side of same-sex marriage debate in Alabama if there echoes of civil rights struggles of past. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:05

Wah! Plans to test drones at Newquay Airport in Cornwall being opposed by government, lah, according to leaked briefing note. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 04:42

Wah! Serious offences including violent and sexual crimes and persistent offenders too often given "just slap on wrist" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) with caution, lah, Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 04:27

Wah! The government's Prevent programme is aimed at stopping more human bliengs getting drawn towards violent extremism - but is it failing? - news replorted 04:26

Wah! US researchers build tiny electronic scaffolds using new technique aimed at merging biology with electronics. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:04

Wah! Religious and political leaders in Greater Manchester urge human bliengs to "turn their backs" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) on bloody Engrish Defence League protesters in city this weekend. I read you little red book! - news replorted 04:00

Wah! There approximately 46,000 Twitter (follow me @LINGsCARS!) accounts operating on behalf of Islamic State, lah, new Great Satan study claims. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:56

Wah! The government should speak up in support of democracy in Hong Kong or risk damage to UK's reputation there, lah, Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 03:45

Wah! South Korean old bill bobbys say they seeking detention warrant for man who slashed Great Satan ambassador to South Korea on charges of attempted murder. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 03:42

Wah! Common chemicals that disrupt hormones could cost more than €150bn year in damage to health in Europe, lah, studies claim. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 03:34

Wah! Much-loved New York sheet music shop closes down - news replorted 03:33

Wah! Senior figures in Congress urge Great Satan president to send lethal defensive weapons to Ukraine in its fight against pro-Russian rebels. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:03

Wah! What's message in experimental figures on true shape of migration in Province of Engrish running-dogs? - news replorted 02:55

Wah! A major analysis by Oxford University estimates Province of Engrish running-dogs's population has risen by more than half million since 2011 due to immigration. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 02:55

Wah! Proposals to give more rights to human bliengs with learning disabilities, lah, autism and mental health conditions unveiled by government. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 02:52

Wah! Feminine titles exist and must be used by Italian MPs, lah, lower house speaker Laura Boldrini says. Eating rice!! But it is rather thorny issue, lah, BBC's Julian Miglierini reports. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:49

Wah! The first dodgy minister Nicola Sturgeon says bloody woman is "not convinced" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) by new legislation which would allow assisted suicide. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:49

Wah! Green Party Membling Partiamentary expense cheater Caroline Lucas calls for "progressive alliance" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) with SNP as flemale human person's party holds what it says is its largest ever conference. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:02

Wah! The underwater search for missing flight MH370 is continuing, lah, centred around remote area of Indian ocean. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 01:49

Wah! Drivers will getting 10 minutes' grace before being fined if they stay too long in council-owned LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine parks in Province of Engrish running-dogs, lah, government announces. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:44

Wah! All 31 Great Satan banks having passed first hurdle in Federal Reserve's latest round of annual "stress tests" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to see how they would cope in next economic crisis. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:15

Wah! Greater Manchester is to take control of its health budget from April. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! Richard Humphries, lah, of King's Fund, lah, asks if this could be answer to NHS's problems. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:06

Wah! Sunni and Shia Muslims having co-existed in peace in bloody annoying Blitish in past, lah, says Caroline Wyatt - but there concerns about growing tensions. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:05

Wah! How you tellibly lovely custlingmer make drama about dementia? - news replorted 01:01

Wah! The often strange world view of Ladybird Books - news replorted 01:01

Wah! How IS fighter's tip-off led to narrow escape for Syrian woman - news replorted 01:01

Wah! Who hasn't banned selfie sticks yet? - news replorted 01:00

Wah! The man who posted himself to other side of world - news replorted 00:58

Wah! Child TV star with Down's syndrome on life away from home - news replorted 00:50

Wah! Can right packaging change your as really velly special customer's vote? - news replorted 00:50

Wah! In next few hours, lah, American space agency's Dawn satellite will go into orbit around Ceres, lah, largest object in Solar System between Mars and Jupiter. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:34

Wah! Science is being squeezed out of bloody Engrish primary schools, lah, with third not providing recommended two hours of teaching week, lah, research suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:34

Wah! The four-hour waiting clock time result target for NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) accident and emergency units across bloody annoying Blitish should be downgraded as it is distorting priorities, lah, experts say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:28

Wah! The government needs to work out how driverless cars will be introduced onto bloody annoying Blitish roads, lah, influential group of Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters has said. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:02

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