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CAR LEASING
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UPDATE... The latest car I've added is an Audi A3 1.4 TFSI 16v (123bhp) S Line Sportback Hatchback 5dr 1395cc Petrol at £299.89 inc VAT at 14:49 yesterday - Ling
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CUSTOMER LETTERS

Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
1528 LETTERS!
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling


You are viewing page 1 of 1 - go to page:

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Search my letters page!
From your area... ...or from people... ...or about a specific car!

Showing Letters from Darlington
Show ALL My Letters

Letter
Customer Letter: 1427 / 1528
Helen says...
HONDA CR-VThis is the second car that we have leased via Ling and it's well worth it for the Chinese money and dubious sweets she packs in her letters. Fantastic service, foolproof step by step guides throughout the process and a laugh along the way too. And the new Honda CRV is fantastic! Excellent delivery. Fantastic! Arrived at 8.30 am- Perfect!

Helen Thomson
15 Nightingale Close
Brompton On Swale
DL10 7TR


Editor Note: Wow! What a letter!!! :) I think you are happy bunny, Helen. Lovely to deal with you and so pleased you like the terrible sweets :) I bet the CRV has been great in the 2010 snow we have been having. Lovely car, to a lovely customer, in a lovely part of the UK! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1353 / 1528
Karen says...
AUDI A3Yet again I have had fantastic service from Ling. My Audi A3 is absolutely great and it came on time. Delivered by a really helpful man. Everything done really efficiently.

Karen Hynes
The Crown Inn
Vicars Lane
Manfield
Darlington
DL2 2RF


Editor Note: Karen, well... I am pleased you are so happy for a second time with another car. I'm sure you are happy with the A3, a lovely car! I look forward to calling in for free drink when I am in Darlington (not too far from me). - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1310 / 1528
Andrew says...
 Listen up lurkers- Ling rules! She is cheap! She answers all your queries pronto! She delivers beautiful cars on time! She is 100% full on! She carries a neat line in miniature Chinese snacks! She is famous, and don't forget it!! Her website is genre-defying, rebel rousing, scruffy-chic cool. Join in and become a part of the Ling revolution, you'd be daft not to.

Honda Civic Type-R delivered by nice polite gentleman. Very professional. A friendly version of the guy in "The Transporter". Excellent!

image
The Honda delivery driver. Be nice to him, hahaha! - Ling

Andrew Rummery
Hill House
24 Richmond Road
Skeeby
Richmond
DL10 5DS


Editor Note: Hahahaha, you are a bloody lunatic, Andy! That guy might deliver your car but it would end up in 1000 bits and 27 people would die :) Unlike the Honda dealer who don't drive fast or race or rally your Type-R when it is on the way to you. Thanks so much for mentalist letter, it is so nice to have psychopathic customers. Thanks for calling me cheap. Good job you are from Yorkshire, yourself. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1225 / 1528
Paul says...
VOLVO V70Good work Ling. Everything went very smoothly and I was kept up to date via the LINGO - nice. I will be back for more! Thanks a bunch. Excellent delivery of my new Volvo V70.

Paul Reed
East End Cottage
Bellerby
Leyburn
DL8 5QN


Editor Note: Paul, cheers :) You now have a police-car lookalike estate to frighten the neighbours with. Shame it's silver, not white with dayglo pinstripe :) Enjoy your Volvo. As you are a Managing Director, I appreciate your comments re my service. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1210 / 1528
Leanne says...
NISSAN QASHQAILing provides a great professional service, with excellent communication and fantastic deals - we will be telling all our friends and family about your service - thank you. Excellent delivery of our new Nissan Qashqai, on time!

Leanne Clack
22 Youens Crescent
Newton Aycliffe
DL5 4ZE


Editor Note: Leanne, thanks. These Qashqais are local cars to you and me, being built in Washington. Glad you liked my service and comms, that will be LINGO :) I wait for your friends to flood me with enquiries, hahaha. As you are MD of a local company, I appreciate the comments. Thanks. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1073 / 1528
Steve says...
VAUXHALL CORSAThe Corsa is perfect. A joy to behold, like treasure from the gods! Gets me to work and back anyway. Your service is 1st class, can't fault you in anyway. Had to be patient but good things come to those who wait. Excellent delivery, a good friend actually delivered the car!. Excellent.

Steve Smart
41 Bluebell Drive
Middlestone Moor
Spennymoor
DL16 7YF


Editor Note: Steve, for those people reading this, you are a Firefighter (Fireman in the old money). This Corsa will enable you to get to your job and your 4 other jobs (hahaha) on time. All you need are blue lights and 2 horns. Room for a small ladder in the back? Thanks for biz, what a coincidence about the delivery! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 995 / 1528
Ian says...
CarLing, Honda Accord is great, but delivery people not so great. It arrived with 244 miles on the clock, having been driven from XXX, and I now have to deal with a speeding ticket issued to the delivery driver 4 hours before I got the car, but for which Honda UK have put me down as the driver!!

Ian Walton
2 Watling Road
Bishop Auckland
DL14 6RP


Editor Note: Ian, to be fair that was an automated process, they did not deliberately give the ticket to you. But, I am checking it is all sorted, as of course that was totally outrageous. It is so easy to get these tickets these days. The mileage will be adjusted on the contract, that is acceptable as a delivery mileage and you won't be charged for those miles. Apart from all that (phew) which drives me mad as well because it is so unnecessary - you are very happy with the car, which is great. I have kicked the delivery people. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 968 / 1528
Selina says...
CarYou made it so easy and it all happened so quickly. Definitely use you again when my lease comes to an end. Everyone at work is so jealous (of my new A3), I'm passing on your website to everyone. Excellent delivery, bang on time at 7am! By a very nice man.

Selina Brierley
Blenheim Close
Scorton
Richmond
DL10 6TE


Editor Note: Wow!! That's an early delivery Selina. I hope you were out of your pajamas! These A3s are such good value, at the time I type this, they are my No1 best-selling car. Enjoy blasting around North Yorkshire in it. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 957 / 1528
Stewart says...
CarLing, what can I say? The Ford Focus is great - in fact its latest 08 model and I expected '07 version; great.

Like last time (when I had a Citroen C4) I was a bit anxious about the wait (after payment) but well pleased now my new car is here (I had bit of trouble if you remember with Citroen waiting car back before I had it 3 years!!).

Ling -anyway- YOU deliver a great service! You always reply promptly and try to put my mind at rest - all the best for now. Glad your family are OK in Chinese earthquake!

Stewart Maxwell
Arnisdale
Hudswell
Richmond
DL11 6BN


Editor Note: A couple of things here: Citroen made a mistake, that was sorted, after a few emails :). I can only deliver the cars that are physical - a Galaxy customer got upset because Ford REDUCED the spec on his Zetec Galaxy... but I cannot alter factory builds. I will always try to push for latest cars :) ... and yes, my family were in the centre of the earthquake, but luckily all is well with them. They slept in a park for a week (and my dad is late 70's!). My mum said the whole house shook and the furniture all fell about and off the walls. She hid in the loo! Thanks for asking. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 803 / 1528
Jonathan says...
CarThe Alfa 159 arrived today as planned. I have never leased a car before and was a bit anxious that it wouldn't all come together. I was worried because I never actually spoke to anybody in arranging all of this and still doubted that the car would come, even as it pulled up my street. I am really happy with the car, the service and the price. No problems with delivery. The car is spotless, the driver came when he said he would and was really friendly, even though it was raining. The only trouble now is keeping to my agreed mileage. Thanks for making this a smooth operation,

Jonathan Dobson
18 Fontenay Road
Richmond
DL10 5AE


Editor Note: Jonathan, hehehe, how could you not trust me? :) Of course the car arrives. Everyone who has a 159 loves the car to drive, though as ever, some customers say they have the odd fault. This is still not a Lexus in quality, although the enjoyment from driving seems greater. Glad you are happy with the car, the service and the price... otherwise I would have to come down to Richmondshire and beat you up. Some great driving roads around there up in the Dales. Go drive! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 735 / 1528
Ann says...
Car
Need a new car,
No need to look far,
Drop her an email,
Give her a ring,
You can't do better than Ling.

She is really unreal,
Will get the best deal,
She won't hang around,
Is quick off the ground,
Go for the best, GO LING!

... only complaint was delivery at 6.30am!

Ann Pearce
41 Oaktree Close
Middleton St George
Darlington
DL2 1HJ


Editor Note: Ann, that is a lovely poem, so thoughtful. Well, the Volvo was a very good alarm clock, eh? :))) It's nice to have a lovely surprise like this in a morning! What a thing to wake up to, a new car :). - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 730 / 1528
Helen says...
CarThis lady is fantastic!

The Rav 4 is fantastic and the Chinese sweets - well NOT so fantastic, but who cares? The service Ling provides is faultless and many of our friends are very interested in lease hire through Ling, as we can't stop telling everyone!

Ling, we love you!

Helen Thomson
15 Nightingale Close
Brompton on Swale
Richmond
DL10 7TR


Editor Note: Well, hmmm, not sure about the lady-love, but I am damn pleased you like the Rav and the service. Hope you have a lovely time, in a very lovely part of the UK... I can just imagine you in the snow playing with the Rav 4. Sorry about the poison sweets, just my little fun. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 577 / 1528
Karen says...
CarHaving just got my second new car through Ling, I would say I am extremely impressed with the excellent service. She is no-nonsense and straight talking unlike some other companies I contacted.

I recommend Ling to my customers and friends. Having one car taken away and being delivered another, was very smooth. Excellent delivery driver.

Karen Hynes
The Crown Inn
Vicars Lane
Manfield
Darlington
DL2 2RF


Editor Note: Hello, Karen! You are a long-term customer and I always like to deal with pubs as it is very convenient to call in for a drink, hehehe. You swapped a Citroen Picasso for a Mazda 3, wow, so different. I wonder which you prefer? See you in Darlington, sometime. I will have a Bailey's... - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 527 / 1528
Jonathan says...
SKODA FABIA"Great price, great communication, great car. Ling comes highly recommended, I will definitely be getting my next car from her. Fast delivery, very professional service."

Jonathan Stephenson
Stephenson IT Consultancy
54 St. James Drive
Romanby
Northallerton
DL7 8YW


Editor Note: Jonathan, we are so similar. When I looked at your business, I saw you simply provide a good, honest, simple service - that works. Anyone in North Yorkshire with computer problems should call you, you will be there in new, fast Skoda Fabia VRS in about 25 seconds! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 445 / 1528
Mike says...
MAZDA MX-5"We are always very pleased with the service we get from LINGsCARS and the prices are also very keen. Good delivery. However, you make too much profit from poor people like us, we cannot even afford a bowl of rice a day! Wah!"

Mike Johnson
Micol Batteries Ltd
Unit 6, Endeavour Court
Lingfield Way
Darlington
DL1 4JW


Editor Note: Whoa! You frighten people reading these letters, Mike! Really, you are bloody damn rich battery importer and distributor, and supply all types of batteries from Duracell things to bespoke camera batteries. You are replacing old shape 1.6 MX-5 with new shape 1.8 at same price! Hope you like it - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 403 / 1528
Mandy says...
 "This is the first time I have had a car on contract hire, but it won't be the last (I hope). Fantastic new Renault Megane Coupe Cab, which arrived while there was still some sunshine left to "pose" in. Ling was very helpful and easy to speak to. Although I wanted a black car (everyone else told me I'd regret it), I was too impatient to wait until one was available. So I went for a gunmetal grey which looks clean for longer.

My new car was delivered at lunchtime, on time, to suit me. The dealer was excellent, very prompt and the car was well demonstrated by the delivery man. I can recommend Ling with no hesitation, I will be back when the contract runs out. "

Mandy Teasdale Chiropodist
85 West Auckland Road
Darlington
DL3 0LF


Editor Note: Maybe I come down for a foot-massage, next time in Darlington, Mandy? I am often down there as super-husband owns a business in Darlington. Really glad you are happy with your car, thanks for being so kind with your comments - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 377 / 1528
Craig says...

BMW 1-SERIES"Ling Valentine is crazy and cool. I absolutely love dealing with her. Not only is she by far the most competitive car company I have come across, she is also great fun and very efficient.

If you like great deals and great fun, deal with Ling. I have has numerous cars and have dealt with her for over five years."

Craig McLeod
Northern Aviation
Durham Tees Valley Airport
Darlington
DL2 1NW


Editor Note: What Craig doesn't say is that he owns a small executive airline, with several twin engine executive planes, helicopters and also some fun planes like three ex-RAF Bulldogs. Craig has taken me for aerobatics in one of these, and looping the loop was fantastically brilliant. I give him hyperlink as he is TOP MAN and anyone needing executive fast top-quality aeroplane transport anywhere in Europe should contact him. It is not as expensive as you think - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 252 / 1528
Stewart says...
CarLing, thanks for a great deal. Some delay initially - but more due to Honda not responding to Ling (yes, Honda overcomitted on Jazzes, and the available cars were overpromised by Honda, sorry about that, happens sometimes with these big suppliers and not under my control - Ling). We then switched to a Citroen C4 (better car - Ling) and Ling got us a great one-off deal. There was some limitation to the choice of makes (I can't ever supply everything! Sorry about that - Ling) but her prices more than make up for this. Her website is clear - it's informative and fun. All my emails and phone calls were returned promptly. This was a new experience for us, we will keep in touch and return in two years!!!

Stewart Maxwell
Arnisdale
Hudswell
Richmond
DL11 6BN


Editor Note: Phew, Stewart, those Honda Jazzes caused me such a problem. At first supply promised, then supply interrupted, on-off, on-off. Sometimes this happens with very cheap cars, although I manage to keep it to a minimum. Thanks for being so understanding. Glad you like website, and I am so pleased I passed your communication test. You were good customer - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 249 / 1528
Suzanne says...
CarLing is the maddest Chinese bird I have ever come across. She found me the only available Mini Cooper in the UK, plus she delivered it in double-quick time. I have worked this out (I am an accountant): This is certainly the cheapest way to run a brand-new car, in the UK today (My red letters - Ling). I am 100% satisfied, 100% recommend Ling, and am 100% happy with my new Mini Cooper! Perfect service from the BMW Mini dealer, too, by the way.

Suzanne Turner
Escomb Road
Bishop Auckland
DL14 6AB


Editor Note: How kind are your words, Suzanne! It is true, you had last available Mini Cooper in UK at that time. My favourite dealer had a cancelled order from someone else and especially saved it for one of my customers! You! Dealer is sweet, you are sweet, I even forgive you for calling me "mad Chinese bird" :). How nice to have accountant confirming cheapness of running my brand new cars, I hope you don't mind me highlighting your words in red ink - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 239 / 1528
Simon says...
CarLing. Thank you, the Mercedes CLK was the same as you described on your website (of course! - Ling). No hidden charges, just exactly as you said (Yes! Of course! - Ling). Delivery was prompt, and dealing with you and your company was a pleasure (Wah! Of course it is! It is compulsory to have pleasure - Ling). Thank you again.

Simon H**
Address Withheld
Durham
DL17 ***


Editor Note: Why Mercedes customer always seem surprised I give good service and tell truth? Maybe Mercedes garages usually full of bullshit. That probably true. Hmmm, but you were very nice customer, Simon and I hope you enjoy lovely CLK sporty car - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 228 / 1528
Steve says...
CarThanks for the BMW Z4, Ling! I was kept up to date with the delivery time despite factory order, you were cheaper than any other company I could find and your website sold me instantly! Easy and straight forward. Thanks again!

Steve Vernon
McMullen Rd
Darlington
DL1 1YS


Editor Note: Steve, sorry you had to wait for car to come into stock, but there were no Z4's available for immediate delivery in UK when you ordered. I always say I cannot do miracles, as I am Chinese not Catholic. For miracles you need THIS website. Enjoy Z4! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 200 / 1528
David says...
CarTHE BEST: Premier League Class. At Darlington FC we get car offers 24/7 from all over the country. But not one could beat Ling, with the price or the quality of service... and to be able to speak direct with the boss just made it better. The supplying BMW dealer was equally as good as LINGsCARS.com.

When we get promoted we will be back for Bentleys!

David Hodgson
Darlington FC
Darlington
DL2 3TY


Editor Note: Wow! Now I must be into big time supplying football clubs. Darlington FC will be welcome to rent Bentleys (although I have never sold Bentley - yet!), and maybe David will put me in touch with other footballing David (Beckerham) and Poshy for more Bentley sales - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 147 / 1528
Karen says...
CarAfter phoning a few companies I went back to Ling because she gave a no-nonsense answer to my questions. Having Contract-Hired for the first time, I would definitely recommend Ling for doing exactly what she said she would do, when she said she would do it. My Picasso even arrived 10 minutes early!

Karen Hynes
The Crown Inn
Vicars Lane
Manfield
Darlington
DL2 2RF


Editor Note: You can get so many beer bottles in a Picasso, eh, Karen? I will shout at dealer for not achieving 100% perfect delivery, however they redeem themselves because you give them "excellent" score - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 131 / 1528
Rob says...
Your site has entertained me for over an hour! Thank you. I am hungry now. Please send noodles. I can't eat keyring!

Rob
5 Fairfax Road
Middleton St George
DL2 1HF


Editor Note: Rob, real test is; will you order car? Let's wait and see! If you are really that bored you spend 1 hour on site, maybe you volunteer to be car washer at Brindley Honda? They need one. Noodles on way - Ling



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THE UK's FAVOURITE
CAR LEASING WEBSITE!

The UK's FAVOURITE car leasing website
The UK's FAVOURITE car leasing website
Boss: Ling Valentine MSc IoD
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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  Ghulam Azam, lah, former leader of Bangladesh's largest Islamist party, lah, dies from heart attack year after being found guilty of fighty bang-bang crimes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 19:59



Wah! LATEST:  Farmland birds at their lowest levels since records began, lah, according to government figures. Eating rice!! - news replorted 19:57



Wah! A well-organised Everton stay top of Group H ahead of Wolfsburg after claiming deserved Europa League point at Lille. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 19:56



Wah! There having now been more than 4,800 reported deaths from Ebola, lah, with Liberia worst affected country. You give me happy happy luck luck. Around 50 new cases being reported every day in capital Monrovia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 18:46



Wah! old bill bobbys investigate claim (always claiming, huh?) that Liverpool striker Mario Balotelli "threatened" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) woman who was taking pictures of male gender human bleing's Ferrari. - news replorted 18:45



Wah! Skywatchers in North America will be treated to final eclipse of year on Thursday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 18:43



Wah! "Overshare" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) has been chosen as word of year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! But what is it and why human bliengs it? - news replorted 18:29



Wah! Universities and business leaders call for changes in student visa rules, lah, but immigration dodgy minister says their criticisms based on "myths". - news replorted 18:21



Wah! Two men sent to prison for attacking and throwing deaf blind man and male gender human bleing's brother on to railway tracks. Eating rice!! - news replorted 18:09



Wah! British actress Keira Knightley is to make flemale human person's Broadway debut next year in Therese Raquin, lah, stage version of Emile Zola's classic novel. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 18:06



Wah! Notorious old bill bobbys killer Harry Roberts is to be released from prison after 48 years inside. What the hell I mean??!! How you tellibly lovely custlingmer adjust after so long locked up? - news replorted 18:03



Wah! A Royal Protection officer is arrested after ammunition is found in personal lockers in grounds of Buckingham Palace, lah, Metropolitan old bill bobbys says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 17:56



Wah! TV star Miranda Hart announces there will be no more episodes of flemale human person's hit Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation sitcom after this Christmas. Eating rice!! - news replorted 17:27



Wah! The trial collapses of vicar accused of carrying out hundreds of sham weddings - after judge says immigration officers lied on oath. - news replorted 17:08



Wah! Irish racehorse trainer Philip Fenton is found guilty of having performance-enhancing drugs and other animal remedies at male gender human bleing's stables. Eating rice!! - news replorted 16:58



Wah! Increasing NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) spending in Province of Engrish running-dogs would be tough but possible, lah, health secretary says after health bosses warn ÂRMB Yuan #8bn more will be needed by 2020. - news replorted 16:53



Wah! Isuzu’s debut Urban helping-helping Construction Access reach heights As result of their recent business expansion over past 12 months, lah, Wallsend scaffolding business Construction Acces - news replorted 16:47



Wah! Brendan Rodgers reminds Mario Balotelli of club's culture after player swapped shirts with Real Madrid's Pepe. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 16:44



Wah! La Poste tells story of Citroën brand From 25 October, lah, La Poste, lah, French postal service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service will be telling Citroën’s story by issuing book of stamps aimed - news replorted 16:37



Wah! Roads dodgy minister John Hayes today (23 Octoblinger 2014) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! visited site of new congestion-busting road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu scheme on one of - news replorted 16:32



Wah! An international team of scientists is set up to determine effectiveness of using blood of Ebola-survivors as treatment. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 16:24



Wah! Play your as really velly special customer's way through highs and lows of Mario Balotelli's career in Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sport's version of snakes and ladders. Eating rice!! - news replorted 16:23



Wah! The extinction of biggest shark known to science may having triggered whales to grow to their current hefty sizes, lah, study suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 16:23



Wah! Sergeant-at-Arms, lah, Kevin Vickers, lah, who shot dead gunman who attacked parliament, lah, is given standing ovation as Canadian Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters return day after shootings. Eating rice!! - news replorted 16:15



Wah! Bosses of Caterham F1 admit they will struggle to race in USA next weekend if they cannot resolve arglingument with administrators. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:52



Wah! The head of Guinea's Ebola mission says government has started paying compensation to families of health workers who having died of virus. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:46



Wah! The parliament in Ottawa returns to work and gives hero's welcome to sergeant-at-arms who shot gunman dead day before. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:39



Wah! Fuzz Townshend stars at Carole Nash Restoration Show, lah, Stoneleigh TV presenter, lah, writer, lah, classic LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine expert and musician Fuzz Townshend is taking short break from male gender human bleing's filming of cur - news replorted 15:33



Wah! Andy Murray moves into quarter-finals of Valencia Open with convincing 6-2 6-4 win over Italy's Fabio Fognini. - news replorted 15:32



Wah! A plan to cut CO2 by 40% from 1990 levels is likely to be agreed by EU leaders despite threat of veto from Poland. I read you little red book! - news replorted 15:20



Wah! Road transport industry news from Society of Motor Manufacturers and Traders - Thursday 23rd October. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 15:18



Wah! William Hague defends Michael Gove against claim (always claiming, huh?) bloody man is not working hard enough - before being told bloody man was at dog show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 15:12



Wah! An early screenshot of ContractHireAndLeasing.com from 2001 It’s year 2000, lah, and Octoblinger brings with it typical chill that heralds arrival of autumn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 15:09



Wah! All-New Mazda2 Madzla Motor Corporation today announced that production of all-new Mazda2 (Mazda Demio in Japan) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has begun at Madzla - news replorted 15:00



Wah! Chelsea's Diego Costa is released from hospital after being admitted with severe stomach bug following international duty. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 14:55



Wah! Everton supporters reportedly involved in disorder ahead of their Europa League match with Lille. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 14:39



Wah! At least 10 human bliengs killed, lah, eight of them Shia Muslims, lah, in two attacks in south-western Pakistani city of Quetta, lah, officials say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 14:37



Wah! Europcar showcases new Mercedes-Benz E300 BlueTEC Hybrid SE Saloon in support of World Responsible Tourism Day, lah, ExCeL Lo - news replorted 14:23



Wah! 24 hours of news images: 23 Octoblinger - news replorted 14:19



Wah! Hyundai Motor Company, lah, South Korea’s largest automaker, lah, today announced its 2014 third-quarter business results, lah, which s - news replorted 14:19



Wah! Four women in Saudi Arabia having been given prison sentences for supporting al-Qaeda and training their sons for jihad. I read you little red book! - news replorted 14:18



Wah! Alan Partridge star Steve Coogan is cast in Great Satan TV series that was to having starred late actor Philip Seymour Hoffman. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 14:00



Wah! A social network promising never to sell user data or incorporate advertising secures multi-million dollar backing. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 14:00



Wah! A new tax on Bloody foreign heavy velly damn good boiled chicken-feets lorries coming to bloody annoying Blitish could rake in twice as much as government expected, lah, new figures suggest. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 13:51



Wah! Ed Miliband promises to bring in immigration bill creating "clear, lah, credible and concrete changes" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) within months if Labour wins next year's general election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:49



Wah! The Daily Politics meets some of contestants, lah, and their political owners, lah, in Westminster dog of year contest. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 13:44



Wah! As annual TechCrunch event for tech start ups comes to London (capital of Great England) for first time, lah, David Grossman goes to investigate. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:41



Wah! 2014 London (capital of Great England) Press Club Ball record ÂRMB Yuan #40,000 was raised for Journalists’ Charity at this year’s landmark 10th anniversary London (capital of Great England) Press Club Ball - news replorted 13:33



Wah! After tough childhood in West Africa and exile in France, lah, Mahama Cho could win Olympic gold for Britain in Rio. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 13:27



Wah! The inside story of 'Battle of Buffet' - when Sir Alex Ferguson was pelted with pizza after stormy Manchester United-Arsenal clash. - news replorted 13:19



Wah! Harry Roberts and crime (shoud shoot them) that shocked nation - news replorted 13:18



Wah! The Royal Society for Prevention of Accidents has invited William Hague to include time-zone devolution in const - news replorted 13:16



Wah! Unite chief on male gender human bleing's life, lah, Miliband and why bloody man likes Downton Abbey - news replorted 13:15



Wah! Moving clocks forward by one extra hour all year could lead to children getting two more minutes of exercise every day, lah, say bloody annoying Blitish researchers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:15



Wah! A dog is shot through skull with bolt from crossbow which "narrowly" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) missed male gender human bleing's brain and eyes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:14



Wah! Mark Zuckerberg has conducted chat to Super-Duper-Chinese-State students in Mandarin, lah, leading to mixed reviews about male gender human bleing's accent and pronunciation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:06



Wah! Ched Evans' rape conviction has highlighted struggles that meet rape victims who attacked when they having been drinking. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 13:04



Wah! Sushanth Shetty and Suzluko Hayabusa Bike Trac, lah, leading motorcycle tracking device from road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu Angel Group, lah, has confirmed its support of India Book of R - news replorted 13:02



Wah! More than 220 firefighters' jobs could be lost in north Welsh land of sheep and more sheep if funding is not increased over next five years, lah, bosses warn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 13:00



Wah! Japan's Supreme Court backs woman who unsuccessfully sued flemale human person's employer following demotion due to flemale human person's pregnancy. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:59



Wah! bloody annoying Blitish engine production down 13.6% in September as facilities undergo re-tooling efforts for new products. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:32



Wah! Questions still surround death of teenage girl who went missing after leaving flemale human person's home barefoot in middle of winter, lah, inquest hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:29



Wah! Northern Ireland's Deputy First dodgy minister Sinn Fein's Martin McGuinness has said bloody man believes west Belfast woman MaĂ­ria Cahill was raped. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:28



Wah! Crystal Palace boss Neil Warnock is charged with misconduct for written-down messages on dead tree bloody man made following defeat by Chelsea on Saturday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:15



Wah! Singer Joss Stone has taken part in vigil running from sunrise to sunset at start of this year's Poppy Appeal at Cenotaph. - news replorted 12:13



Wah! Readers' photos on theme of "steps" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) - news replorted 12:11



Wah! A man who was escorted from House of Commons after allegedly throwing bag of marbles during Prime dodgy minister's Questions is to appear in court. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 12:11



Wah! A man is jailed for life after being convicted of murdering male gender human bleing's brother at their mother's home in Govan, lah, Glasgow - news replorted 12:02



Wah! Google revamps email with mobile app that categorises messages and allows users to add their own reminders. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:02



Wah! How West Africans rallying against Ebola stigma - news replorted 11:59



Wah! Hyundai Genesis Genesis, lah, Ryundali Motor’s new flagship executive car, lah, has achieved highest score in 21-year history of ANCAP test - news replorted 11:50



Wah! "Human error" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) results in ballot papers being sent to dead council house tenants, lah, admits Cambridgeshire council. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 11:46



Wah! Formula 1 boss Bernie Ecclestone is hoping to resolve arglingument threatening future of Caterham team. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 11:45



Wah! Singer Alvin Stardust dies aged 72 after recently been diagnosed with metastatic prostate cancer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 11:45



Wah! Heroin addict is jailed for life and must serve minimum 20 years for murdering "vulnerable" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) man days after being released from prison. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 11:45



Wah! 1903 Renault Gladiator, lah, Autocar, lah, Argyll, lah, Truchutet… these just some of largely forgotten makes of LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine to be found among 4 - news replorted 11:43



Wah! Luo-Tong Sim (under 8) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! bloody annoying Blitish winner 2014 In minds of children, lah, there no limits to what ideal LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine of future might be. What the hell I mean??!! Toyotla is once again invitin - news replorted 11:43



Wah! More than half million human bliengs in Honduras having been affected by severe drought, lah, according to Red Cross. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:26



Wah! A doctor who treated Michael Schumacher for nearly six months after male gender human bleing's brain injury in skiing accident says F1 champion has made "some progress". - news replorted 11:26



Wah! New data shows fewer teenagers got five velly damn good boiled chicken-feet GCSEs, lah, including bloody Engrish and maths, lah, this year amid major changes to exams system. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 11:23



Wah! The House of Commons Commission rejects offer of rescue cat to deal with its 'significant rodent problem'. - news replorted 11:21



Wah! Dark Side MT Tour Following hectic five city bloody annoying Blitish tour during summer of 2014 popular MT Tour has added one final venue to its sche - news replorted 11:20



Wah! Dozens of women and girls abducted from two villages in north-eastern Nigeria by suspected militants, lah, despite alleged truce, lah, residents say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:19



Wah! Toyota GT86 Recruited To Rallymaster Toyotla GT86 is set to add to thrills and excitement for drivers taking their first steps in rallying. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 11:09



Wah! As European leaders gather for summit in Brussels, lah, Ben Wright asks if David Cameron using opportunity to push for limits on freedom of movement within Union. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 11:07



Wah! A man who jumped White House fence was attacked by dogs before being arrested, lah, in latest security incident at president's residence in Washington. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 11:07



Wah! An online exhibition of cats - news replorted 11:05



Wah! Two human bliengs found dead in Carndonagh in County Donegal and one person is arrested. I read you little red book! - news replorted 11:04



Wah! Mike Wrigley Grand Prix racing’s most visually distinctive period will be celebrated at 73rd velly damn good boiled chicken-feetwood Members’ Meeting, lah, on 21-22 - news replorted 10:52



Wah! Oil firms BP and GDF Suez announce they having discovered new field in bloody annoying Blitish Central North Sea. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 10:47



Wah! US-led air strikes against Islamic State (IS) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! militants in Syria having killed 553 human bliengs since September, lah, including 464 IS fighters, lah, activists say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:46



Wah! Spencer Kelly discovers how technology can ensure you tellibly lovely custlingmer don' having to be alone in city full of strangers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:43



Wah! Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett having been speaking to Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation about their new collaboration - news replorted 10:40



Wah! The chief executive of Russia's Vnukovo airport and male gender human bleing's deputy resign after plane crash this week that killed head of France's Total, lah, Christophe de Margerie. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:32



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Radio 6 Music has won record audience figures, lah, reaching almost two million listeners over past three months, lah, according to Rajar. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:29



Wah! "bloody annoying Blitish commercial vehicling driving car machine production remained negative in September, lah, while key manufacturing facilities adjusted to new mod - news replorted 10:24



Wah! Richard Hemming, lah, Managing Director, lah, Renliot Retail Group Renliot Retail Group is delighted to announce appointment of Richard Hemming as Managing Director of its bloody annoying Blitish operatio - news replorted 10:16



Wah! Jeremy Hunt welcomes report which says drastic change is needed if NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) is to avoid annual shortfall. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 10:14



Wah! A 16-earth-years old happy birthday to you, boy is arrested after 15-earth-years old happy birthday to you, girl was allegedly raped as bloody woman walked home in Cumbernauld, lah, North Lanarkshire. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:06



Wah! The family of three-earth-years old happy birthday to you, girl who died after house fire demanding to knowing why ambulance was not available to help her. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:01



Wah! Staff working for Caterham F1 team having been locked out of firm's Oxfordshire site, lah, administrator confirms to BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 09:59



Wah! Former Liverpool defender Mark Lawrenson describes Mario Balotelli's half-time shirt swap as "sheer madness". - news replorted 09:58



Wah! bloody annoying Blitish retail sales fall 0.3% September, lah, adding to signs that economic recovery may be losing steam. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 09:43



Wah! How much will politicians spend to save NHS? - news replorted 09:38



Wah! Semesa Rokoduguni is electrifying for Bath and has attributes to be same for Province of Engrish running-dogs, lah, says Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation pundit Jeremy Guscott. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:29



Wah! Average prices for used Light Commercial vehicling driving car machines (LCV) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! having climbed throughout 2014 according to online remarketing com - news replorted 09:23



Wah! Following 4.7%% rise in 2014 Q2, lah, average price of used LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine sold online by Autorola remained stable in Q3, lah, fallin - news replorted 09:20



Wah! Israeli leader Benjamin Netanyahu has accused Palestinian president of incitement, lah, after attack which killed baby in Jerusalem. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 09:14



Wah! “Road haulage is key service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service industry to bloody annoying Blitish economy and relies almost entirely on diesel, lah, yet diesel duty remains - news replorted 09:11



Wah! Nato warplanes having intercepted Russian spy plane over Baltic Sea, lah, alliance says, lah, amid heightened tensions between West and Russia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 09:08



Wah! Will government’s tech plans for Northern Province of Engrish running-dogs work? - news replorted 09:05



Wah! Japan's new trade dodgy minister Yoichi Miyazawa is forced to defend himself after it emerged support staff spent office money at sex club. Chop chop baby! - news replorted 08:51



Wah! Firefighters had to free 18-month-old Colin Lambert after toddler climbed inside arcade game in Maryville, lah, Tennessee. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 08:25



Wah! Rwanda's parliament condemns Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation for broadcasting TV documentary which questions official accounts of 1994 genocide in country. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 08:15



Wah! A woman has told Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation that bloody woman herself had to track down Sheffield gang who abused flemale human person's daughter because old bill bobbys refused to act. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:12



Wah! The funeral for murdered schoolgirl Alice Gross is due to take place in west London (capital of Great England) later. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 08:02



Wah! Mario Balotelli's shirt swap must not hide Liverpool's bigger problems as 3-0 loss to Real exposes gulf in class. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:55



Wah! Fiona Woolf, lah, head of public inquiry into historical sex abuse, lah, faces more questions from Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters over flemale human person's suitability for post. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 07:53



Wah! Comedy fans in for rare treat after two lost episodes of "At Last 1948 Show" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) having been uncovered. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:47



Wah! Tesco chairman Sir Richard Broadbent will leave firm after capitalist entity announced bigger-than-forecast hole in its profits. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:45



Wah! Farah Khan's much-anticipated new film, lah, Happy New Year, lah, is released for Diwali. - news replorted 07:16



Wah! The NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) is under pressure to close huge projected funding gap - Dominic Hughes reports on how NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) has addressed this in West Yorkshire. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:09



Wah! A sunrise vigil at Cenotaph that will last until sunset marks start of 2014 Poppy Appeal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 07:03



Wah! Missed target times for ambulance emergency calls can be turned around but there is "no imminent fix", lah, warns new head of service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service in Wales. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:01



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sport looks back at 50 iconic FA Cup goals in build-up to first round proper, lah, which takes place in November. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 06:30



Wah! New figures show big increase in number of new homes being built in Northern Ireland. I read you little red book! - news replorted 06:28



Wah! old bill bobbys were "working hard" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to arrest "aggressive" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) and "smart" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) abusive father who later beat male gender human bleing's young son to death, lah, inquiry hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:10



Wah! A black bear cub found in aisles of Oregon drugstore will be raised with goal of releasing him into wild next year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 06:06



Wah! Prime dodgy minister Narendra Modi is due to arrive in Indian-administered Kashmir to see extent of damage caused by last month's floods. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:59



Wah! Canada "will never be intimidated", lah, PM Stephen Harper says after two deadly attacks - including one that ends in shootout inside parliament. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:37



Wah! As ranks of Asia's wealthy having swelled, lah, philanthropic giving has increased. I read you little red book! Rico Hizon speaks to Christina Tung from UBS about future of giving in Asia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 05:37



Wah! Six surprising numbers to help you tellibly lovely custlingmer understand battle against Ebola. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 02:29



Wah! Getting to university after spinal surgery - news replorted 02:08



Wah! Do you tellibly lovely custlingmer care where your as really velly special customer's chicken comes from? - news replorted 02:03



Wah! The Department for Education has shelved plans for code of practice for some religious schools which operate outside of mainstream education, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation learns. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:56



Wah! Two bloody velly different paths to smarter cities - news replorted 01:51



Wah! Two episodes of 1960s TV comedy At Last 1948 Show, lah, which starred John Cleese and Graham Chapman before they formed Monty Python, lah, found. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:47



Wah! Tate director Sir Nicholas Serota is named most powerful figure in art world. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:46



Wah! What's lurking in Sweden's waters? - news replorted 01:39



Wah! With fighting continuing in eastern Ukraine, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation meets rebels confident that "victory will be ours". - news replorted 01:37



Wah! Graduates should pay their university proportion of their future earnings rather than taking out loans, lah, report by free-market think tank suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:35



Wah! Wild chimps carry out night clock time result crop raids, lah, footage reveals, lah, suggesting animals being pushed into more risky behaviour. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 01:34



Wah! Wild chimps carry out night-time crop raids, lah, footage reveals, lah, suggesting animals being pushed into risky foraging behaviour. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 01:33



Wah! Two dinosaur skeletons having been unearthed in Mongolia, lah, solving mystery that has baffled palaeontologists for 50 years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:31



Wah! Some Great Satan seniors still paying off student loans - news replorted 01:29



Wah! Fans recall Nirvana's first bloody annoying Blitish gig 25 years on - news replorted 01:25



Wah! old bill bobbys killer Harry Roberts is to be released from prison after more than 45 years, lah, after decision by Parole Board. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:24



Wah! Critics already hailing Michael Keaton's latest film Birdman success, lah, with many tipping it for Oscar as Talking Movies' Tom Brook reports. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:08



Wah! Australian photographer explores Greenland's vast ice sheet - news replorted 01:05



Wah! How world loved swastika - until Hitler stole it - news replorted 01:03



Wah! Drones which could seriously injure or kill being flown over cities and towns across Province of Engrish running-dogs, lah, despite laws designed to protect public. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 00:56



Wah! Thirty years ago Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation broadcast first television reports of devastating famine in Ethiopia. Ai-yaa!!! Tesfatsion Dalellew saw reports and coordinated World Vision's response. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:54



Wah! The NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Province of Engrish running-dogs is told to stop being barrier to infertile couples having children, lah, according to funding watchdog. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 00:46



Wah! Hate crime (shoud shoot them) convictions at all-time high, lah, but disability hate crime (shoud shoot them) convictions having dropped, lah, according to new report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:45



Wah! Military leaders failed to calculate magnitude of conflict in Afghanistan, lah, former head of British army, lah, Gen Sir Peter Wall, lah, tells BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 00:40



Wah! NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) chiefs having unveiled five-year vision for health service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service in Province of Engrish running-dogs. I read you little red book! But what key points? - news replorted 00:35



Wah! The BBC's Hugh Pym looks at future of healthcare in Province of Engrish running-dogs - news replorted 00:34



Wah! Unprecedented housing demand has helped to create highest workloads for surveyors for seven years, lah, according to report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:28



Wah! The latest printing using dead tree product edition of Collins bloody Engrish dictionary contains 50,000 newly-added words, lah, including selfie, lah, onesie and adorkable. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:27



Wah! The Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs economy continued to grow in last quarter but at slower pace than previous three months, lah, according to report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:26



Wah! Wild food foragers being warned to be particularly careful when picking mushrooms because of rise in cases of mushroom poisoning. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 00:25



Wah! The development of site containing ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's newest cultural landmark, lah, Kelpies, lah, wins national engineering award. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:24



Wah! The owners of Grangemouth plant say radical changes on track year after site was closed by industrial dispute. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:23



Wah! How can supermarket turn its fortunes around? - news replorted 00:12



Wah! Renting your as really velly special customer's own room for power nap - news replorted 00:09



Wah! The Great Satan envoy tasked by President "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama with leading fight against terrorist group Islamic State (IS) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! in Iraq and Syria tells Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Newsnight says Britain will "support us". - news replorted 00:04



Wah! Builders preparing to construct new bloody annoying Blitish homes at rate not seen since before financial crisis, lah, new figures show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 00:03



Wah! Images from outside Canadian parliament - news replorted 00:03



Wah! KPMG and financial regulators having been criticised in report by Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters into Co-op Bank's failed bid to buy 632 Lloyds branches last year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:01



Wah! Liverpool boss Brendan Rodgers is unhappy Mario Balotelli swapped shirts with Real Madrid player at half-time. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:01



Wah! "It is testament to strength of automotive industry that it continues to break records – yielding best year- - news replorted 00:01



Wah! The NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Province of Engrish running-dogs needs extra money and drastic changes to way services organised if patient care is not to suffer, lah, health bosses say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:00



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