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CUSTOMER LETTERS

Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
1528 LETTERS!
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling


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Letter
Customer Letter: 1537 / 1528
Dean says...
MAZDA 6Ling made everything so easy for me, with outstanding, excellent service all round. Everything went smoothly and we received our new car within 4 weeks. We shopped around a lot for the best deals, and Ling by far came out with the best deal and cheapest price. Received the Mazda 6 on time in person from an excellent dealer.

Dean Wells
9 Deepdale
Hadrian Lodge West
Wallsend
NE288SL


Editor Note: Dean, great letter, thanks. Really appreciate the kind comments, from the ancient Roman settlement of Wallsend. I thank the dealer . Enjoy the Mazda! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1533 / 1528
Cristopher says...
MERCEDES C-CLASS SALOON An excellent service for my new Mercedes C Class, very fast, friendly and efficient. Thank you very much!! Dealer was excellent – It was a pleasure.

Cristopher Beattie
76 Sevenacres
Great Lumley
Chester Le Street
DH3 4JT


Editor Note: Great news, Cris. I like fast, friendly and efficient. Hard to beat that, especially as the car was very cheap. :) Mercs rock, eh? - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1532 / 1528
David says...
FORD FIESTADealing with Ling is a pleasure, her staff are friendly and informative, which coupled with the website actually makes replacing your car a fun experience. Thanks Ling, love the Fiesta by the way.

David Gallon
Heathcol Welding Supplies Ltd
257a Dukesway
Team Valley Trading Estate
Gateshead
NE11 0PZ


Editor Note: Hmmm, I must beat my staff up more, if they have that much time to be friendly, hahaha. Glad you had fun, everyone with these new Fiestas, loves them. You are local to me, in Gateshead - on the same trading estate in fact! Great, eh? Acapulco of the North. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1524 / 1528
Brian says...
 Ling, it was a pleasure to deal with your company from start to finish. Every query and question was dealt with promptly. I was made to feel like I was your “only” customer such was the personal nature of your service. Dealer Service – Excellent – Very prompt and efficient.

Brian Roffe
45, Stratford Ave
Grangetown
Sunderland
SR2 8RY


Editor Note: Brian, but you were my only customer, it was a quiet week, hahahahaha! I do treat everyone individually, I find it much more enjoyable. Mazda 3 is a great car, low-profile, but very good. Thanks for your communication, you were very good to deal with, that helps. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1512 / 1528
Sydney says...
RENAULT MEGANE COUPEThanks Ling; absolutely fab service from start to finish. Staff were brill, always helpful and friendly couldn't have asked for a better first experience. Would recommend you without a doubt and have been telling everyone how impressed I was. Dealer Service – Excellent – Prompt on time and exceptional with my new Renault Megane Coupe.

Sydney Fraser
18 Percy Lonnen
Prudhoe
NE42 5QU


Editor Note: What another lovely letter. The supplier will appreciate getting a copy - I have forwarded it. You are pretty local to me, so possibly I will see you buzzing around in your Megane. Cool cars, these. Thanks for being lovely customer, Syd! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1489 / 1528
Andrew says...
NISSAN QASHQAII simply cannot believe how easy leasing a car has been. In fact the most difficult part of the whole process was actually choosing a car that I wanted. There was so much choice!

I have never leased a car before and was rather pessimistic about leasing as I have always owned my car. One visit to LingsCars.com totally changed my mind as it listed all the costs, how it all worked and instant access to a member of staff who also were brilliant when I asked questions.

I am very happy with my new Qashqai and is the best decision I have ever made regarding cars as especially in this snowy weather the car is brilliant.

I can't ever see myself buying a car again; I just don't see the point. Especially with what Ling is offering. The customer service on the website is literally phenomenal and you know exactly where you stand all the time.

Thanks very much Ling.

Dealer Service – EXCELLENT, brilliant service. Thank you!

Andrew Appleyard
11 Fox Howe
Coulby Newham
Middlesbrough
TS8 0RU


Editor Note: What a long letter, lovely! You are a Programme Executive with the Prince's Trust, so you are an expert in excellence. I appreciate your comments. Thanks for that PHENOMENAL word, love it. Enjoy the bloody nice Qashqai, hope Charlie is impressed when he sees it! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1486 / 1528
Susan says...
VOLKSWAGEN SCIROCCOFrom the very beginning I received nothing but excellent service. I would say that LingsCars are very professional organised and approachable – no one else can touch Ling for her deals. She is also however quite crazy!!

As the car I wanted (Scirocco) was an automatic and particular colour, it had to be factory order and the wait was approx 4 months. However, I was kept informed of the progress all the way – many times I received e-mails just checking in and wishing me a good weekend etc. I would log into the website just for a laugh and to share it with colleagues at work – MAD!

I still get immense pleasure from just getting in the car and I don't think, especially as this is a second car for us, that I could have afforded to buy it with this spec. I will definitely be using LingsCars again when this lease is up. However, Love the car so much – don't want to think that far ahead.

Excellent dealer, car was clean, delivered when advised and very courteous service.

Susan Hobson
17 Sunningdale Drive
Usworth
Washington
NE37 2LL


Editor Note: Woooo Hooo. It is great to read this stuff! Always difficult when a bespoke car is such a long lead time, but this is why I have LINGO, so the wait is painless. Progress is always passed on, even if bad news. But your car was all GOOD NEWS, Susan. Thanks so much for the business. Hope you have lovely time in the fast Scirocco! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1484 / 1528
Brian says...
CITROEN C5If I knew then what I know now I would have contract hired a car from Ling years ago, its so easy and cheap! No messing about, no hard sell and a great service. From asking for a quote to having my C5 delivered to my door it couldn't have been simpler. Delivery is free and prompt. Finance was quick and information accurate.

Brian Nelson
16 Frederick Street North
Meadowfield
Durham
DH7 8NB


Editor Note: Hahaha, well, it has taken me years to get to this stage... but really you had a very successful time getting a car. The C5 is lovely car. Plus, you got Sat Nav! So you won't get lost around County Durham. Thanks for being great customer, Brian! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1481 / 1528
Marie says...
NISSAN QASHQAIWould highly recommend LingsCars. No other dealer/ lease company could match the great deal I got from Ling. Easy, easy, easy process thanks to the Lingo website. All my questions were answered within minutes! Friendly/ funny staff – had many laughs along the way. In other words, EXCELLENT customer service. Many freebies – mainly Chinese polos! Remember confusions say “too many Chinese polos mean many trips to dentist” :o)

Marie Culley
14 Limetrees Gardens
Low Fell
Gateshead
NE9 5BE


Editor Note: Hahahah, good job you are not a dentist, Marie. You are local to me in Gateshead, you live less than 1 mile away, so I will see you around and about in the Qashqai... and the car is made only 5 miles from us both, too! Thanks for super letter! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1464 / 1528
Gary says...
CITROEN C5 TOURERGood service. Very Happy. Good dealer service, nice guy.

Gary Bone
35 Tamarisk Way
Sheriff Hill
Gateshead
NE9 6GD


Editor Note: WoW! Gary, you live about 500m from me, amazing, and from the best music pub in the UK - the Three Tuns! So, I will definitely see you flashing around in your new C5 Tourer. These are great cars, so comfortable. Glad everything went well! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1460 / 1528
Rajiv says...
TOYOTA AYGOApart from the long delivery time for the Aygo and the delivery of the vehicle to the wrong address, I cannot fault he excellent service you and your team provide. Good dealer, but... Oops!! Delivered car to the wrong address, but then brought the car to the correct address the same day.

Rajiv Menezes
Address Withheld
North Shields
NE29 ***


Editor Note: Aaaagh, I pull my hair out at these damn car dealers, why can't they get it right? The Aygos are simply in demand and there is not much stock. We had to wait for a car to be built. Glad you like the service, Rajiv. I withhold your address, because you are a doctor - to avoid druggy idiots attacking you. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1457 / 1528
Allen says...
AUDI A4 SALOONLing, I have been delighted with the service from LingsCars and as well as being an easy way of leasing a car it is done in a fun and wacky way! Keep up the good work. Good delivery of my Audi A4.

Allen Jones
37 Hartley Ave
Whitley Bay
NE26 3NS


Editor Note: Allen, thanks. Another Audi bites the dust :) Glad you enjoyed the process, it's great that you send me this lovely letter! Cheers, mate! You are quite local to me too, maybe I see you around? - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1442 / 1528
Jonathon says...
CITROEN C5Words to describe LINGsCARS.com:- Personal, efficient, friendly, professional, fun.

My car/deal- I am delighted with my car and feel that I have got a good value for money deal. Score for LINGsCARS.com = 10/10

Very happy customer! Suggestions for improvement- although the car was delivered with a couple of weeks of signing the docs, things did go a little quiet. Try to keep in touch to reassure that car is coming. Excellent delivery, the delivery driver was very courteous.

Jonathon Malton
14 Monkseaton Drive
Whitley Bay
Tyne And Wear
NE26 1SZ


Editor Note: Whoa! Looks like I did not communicate well enough on delivery. I take massive note and improve this, Jon. However, checking, between the time you received the documents and delivery, I had 12 messages to you on LINGO, but I admit there were 6 days while we waited for the delivery to take place when you had no updates. So, I have changed procedures and my system will now not let more than 3 days pass without an update. I appreciate that feedback, thanks. So pleased you still give me 10/10!

Apart from this, you are a chai expert with Ringtons, so I had loads of tea advice along the way :) Hope you enjoy the C5 immensely. Super customer, great fun! - Ling




Letter
Customer Letter: 1439 / 1528
Dr says...
FORD FIESTAIt's been a really good experience for me as it was the first time I had taken a car on lease and definitely will go for it again through Ling. Service was prompt and excellent. Have already promoted and recommended LINGsCARS to a couple of friends. Excellent delivery, the Fiesta was brought on time as promised.

Dr Punekar
Address Withheld
Newcastle Upon Tyne
NE3 ***


Editor Note: Samad, thanks so much for the letter. You are a doctor very close to me, so: I hope I never have to meet you, hahaha! If I do, I hope your service is as good as mine and you keep me alive. Really pleased you are happy. I withhold your address as doctors can be targetted by druggie idiots. Enjoy the Fiesta! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1427 / 1528
Helen says...
HONDA CR-VThis is the second car that we have leased via Ling and it's well worth it for the Chinese money and dubious sweets she packs in her letters. Fantastic service, foolproof step by step guides throughout the process and a laugh along the way too. And the new Honda CRV is fantastic! Excellent delivery. Fantastic! Arrived at 8.30 am- Perfect!

Helen Thomson
15 Nightingale Close
Brompton On Swale
DL10 7TR


Editor Note: Wow! What a letter!!! :) I think you are happy bunny, Helen. Lovely to deal with you and so pleased you like the terrible sweets :) I bet the CRV has been great in the 2010 snow we have been having. Lovely car, to a lovely customer, in a lovely part of the UK! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1425 / 1528
Sarah says...
PEUGEOT 308Found LINGsCARS after recommendation from family and expected the service to be compromised because the price of my new Peugeot 308 was so much lower than anywhere else I had looked. This wasn't the case and I couldn't have been treated any better - despite the remote location of my house. I would and have recommended Ling to everyone I know.

Sarah Jarrett
6 Portland Steet
Workington
Cumbria
CA14 4BQ


Editor Note: Hahahaha, price of the car has nothing to do with service, Sarah. I treat all customers the same, from Matiz to BMW M3. No difference to me. I generate the lowest prices possible, and demand top service from suppliers. Lovely letter from wild and windy (and wet) Cumbria, thanks so much! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1400 / 1528
David says...
VOLKSWAGEN SCIROCCOThis is the first time I've used contract hire to get a car and I must say that the experience of using LingsCars has been excellent from start to finish. The communication has been superb throughout and by far the best for any product that I've purchased recently.

I think your Lingo system is great and really lets people feel a lot more in control of things. Other companies (not just those in the car leasing business) could learn a lot from this. I have already recommended LingsCars to friends and would have no hesitation in using you again. Good delivery, car arrived not quite agreed time, but otherwise great.

David Groark
1 Avoncroft Close
Seaton
Seaham
SR70LL


Editor Note: Dave, thanks so much :) As this was a VW Scirocco, it was subject to a small delay as the production was overbooked at the factory and VW struggled to cope, but... you have one of the best selling cars of 2009, and so cheap. Hope you love it. Thanks for kind comments. Great customer. Funny name though, I still can't say it. :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1393 / 1528
David says...
FORD FIESTALeasing a car from LingsCars was the easiest and quickest way I have ever had. Top class secure system and update information given every day. Would not go anywhere else for my cars! Spot on delivery with a friendly service.

David Peareth
58 Woodside Gardens
Dunston
Gateshead
NE119RB


Editor Note: Peas, you are a skilled gardener with local council, so I went on Google Earth to show a pic of the very flower beds you maintain. In summer they are stunning:
image
Good eh? Glad you love my service and the Fiesta. See you around, in Gateshead! - Ling




Letter
Customer Letter: 1369 / 1528
John says...
AUDI A3Hi Ling, thanks for the great service during the whole process. Car arrived two days earlier than planned. Loved the crack during the emails, the best thing was the sweets sent in the post, ta. Excellent services Ling, who needs a Dragon? Good service and good communication from the dealer during delivery, too.

John Wardropper
7, Craster Point
East Shore Village
Seaham Co Durham
SR7 7WW


Editor Note: Hey, you are easily pleased if the best thing about getting a new Audi A3 are some rancid Chinese sweets! :) I choose the worst ones, especially! Hahahaha. Have a super time in your new A3 Sport. You are quite close to me, in Seaham, maybe see you around? - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1355 / 1528
Jayne says...
CITROEN C5First car I have leased. I found the service very professional, Ling is great to deal with, great sense of humour!! The website and secure LINGO system for communication is "Boss"!! Cannot speak highly enough! Good delivery of my new C5.

Jayne Wilson
Hollygarth
Carlton-in-Cleveland
Middlesbrough
TS9 7BB


Editor Note: Jayne, you are Op Manager for a company in Carlisle and I am so happy to get good reports like this from someone who deals with day-to-day operations. It means I am doing something right!!! Have a great time in the C5, and welcome to the world of leasing! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1353 / 1528
Karen says...
AUDI A3Yet again I have had fantastic service from Ling. My Audi A3 is absolutely great and it came on time. Delivered by a really helpful man. Everything done really efficiently.

Karen Hynes
The Crown Inn
Vicars Lane
Manfield
Darlington
DL2 2RF


Editor Note: Karen, well... I am pleased you are so happy for a second time with another car. I'm sure you are happy with the A3, a lovely car! I look forward to calling in for free drink when I am in Darlington (not too far from me). - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1346 / 1528
Nina says...
PEUGEOT 107The service was fantastic, it was so fast and efficient. I love my new car and will be looking for a new deal as soon as my current agreement expires. Good delivery of my Peugeot 107, very pleasant and on time.

Nina Sexton
32 Edward Street
Pegswood
Morpeth
NE61 6UH


Editor Note: That is excellent, Nina! So happy you are so happy. You are not far from my office so I may see you driving around. It's lovely that you say you will be back. Please enjoy the 107! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1327 / 1528
Susan says...
FORD FIESTAI'm thrilled with my new Ford Fiesta! Ling made the process idiot proof, was professional and even when there was a glitch to resolve after the delivery inspection, this was done with a sense of urgency and no-nonsense. Thanks Ling, we're recommending you to all our friends and family. Delivery was poor, but the dealer's effort to resolve things was excellent!

Susan Sehzade-Cosway
20 Dalesman Drive
Carlisle
CA1 3TH


Editor Note: OK, for the benefit of people reading this I will detail: On delivery, Sue noticed the airbag warning light had come on. There were also some other things - there were a couple of stone chips and the car was dirty (a wet day). The dealer immediately, personally went to sort this stuff out. Sue then sent me a message: "Really appreciate your swift response and push to resolve the prob with the car. 'Neil' just called and has assured me that surplus mileage will be reimbursed by cheque, and he is coming personally to collect my car leaving me with his until mine is back with me. He was extremely apologetic and very reluctant to send the car to our local Ford dealership given their shoddy response to me earlier today. The car is booked into his service dept first thing tomorrow and he has let them know he wants a 'diagnosis' by 10am."

(Then Sue sent another message)...

"Neil called me about an hour ago to confirm that it was a tiny problem of a connector not having been connected properly (under the seat for the airbag) by the manufacturer. Such a relief and finding my excitement rising again at getting my new and perfect car :o). I can't thank you enough for your superb customer service and personal attention in this matter. As I stated previously, the glitch with the warning light was a Ford problem and we cannot fault your handling of this matter. You have been superb! We also feel that Neil went the whole extra mile too in his handling of this issue and will be conveying this to his manager (s) if you would be so kind to supply us with their name(s) and contact address. Needless to say we will recommend you to as many people as will listen!"

(Then a bit later)...

"Just to confirm, the car was delivered by Neil about an hour and a half ago. Everything is in order and very pleased with it."

All in all excellent dealer response, I agree! Glad you love the car, Sue, and thanks so much for all comments. Other customers will appreciate to read this. Well done to Neil at the dealer! - Ling




Letter
Customer Letter: 1320 / 1528
Jayne says...
CITROEN C5This was the first time I have had a car on contract hire and I was surprised how easy it was. I believe a lot of it was down to you. I can recommend you to anyone and have already done so. Many thanks. Good delivery. The CD installation let the dealer down, after 3 weeks I still don't have it fitted.

Jayne Wilson
Hollygarth
Carlton-in-Cleveland
Middlesbrough
TS9 7BB


Editor Note: Well, for the record, the supplier (today) said: "The company we use for CD players has let us down. He promised he could supply and fit the correct CD player but now he is saying he cannot and not phoning any of us back. Our parts department is ordering one from the factory which we will then go up and fit. I will give Mrs Wilson a call with an update. I did call Mr Wilson yesterday and explained what we were doing.". However, I am annoyed that it has to take this long for action, and the supplying Citroen dealer must take responsibility at an earlier stage. The dealer has been kicked. It is so important to give customers good service and it is always finance companies and dealers who let the side down. Soon, you will be able to blast out your CDs, Jayne! :) I must say, you do have a CD player in your car, just not the CD changer system. I would not allow you to have NO music :) Apart from that, thanks so much for the comments about my service. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1314 / 1528
Kevin says...
FORD FIESTAExcellent service from start to finish. The web login is fantastic and an easy way to keep track of progress. Ling's replies are almost instant as well! Absolutely chuffed to bits with the price, the service, the car (Ford Fiesta 1.6 TDCi Zetec S) - any chance of some mats?

Kevin Royal
Address Withheld
Durham
DH1 ***


Editor Note: I withhold your address as you have a sensitive public service job. Yes, I will send some mats :) Special ones with my head on them so you can kick it with your feet, hahaha! I try to reply as fast as possible, average reply time is often less than 5 minutes, normally around 10 minutes (I need time to find the answers you want!). Glad you like the LINGO web management. Enjoy the Fiesta! - Ling



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Wah! A picture of stampeding antelopes captured on plains of South Africa’s Kariega Game Reserve wins overall best European Wildlife photograph. - news replorted 14:34



Wah! Younus Khan becomes Pakistan's highest Test century maker as they set Australia 438 to win first Test in Dubai. - news replorted 14:27



Wah! Ted Bishop, lah, former president of PGA of America, lah, has apologised after calling Ian Poulter "little girl" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) on social media. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 14:25



Wah! A 15-earth-years old happy birthday to you, boy is arrested on suspicion of attempted murder after teenage boy was stabbed on bus in south London. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 14:09



Wah! A year ago, lah, funny shape ball-game player Sam Chalmers' world collapsed after bloody man admitted using prohibited substances. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:00



Wah! First dodgy minister Carwyn Jones tells Radio 4's Any Questions bloody man is not afraid of scrutiny of NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Wales. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:27



Wah! Egypt faces existential threat from jihadists, lah, president says, lah, after at least 31 soldiers killed in two attacks in Sinai peninsula. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 13:03



Wah! A fourth man from Portsmouth who went to fight in Syria for Islamic State is believed to having been killed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:55



Wah! The case of Belfast woman Maíria Cahill has been unfairly politicised, lah, says Sinn Féin President Gerry Adams. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:48



Wah! Basic pilot training for RAF and Royal Navy will now take place in Anglesey, lah, it is confirmed by Ministry of Defence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:28



Wah! World number one Serena Williams beats Caroline Wozniacki in third set tie-break to reach WTA final in Singapore. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:23



Wah! A 49-earth-years old happy birthday to you, woman dies after flemale human person's crash collided with another LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine on A862 Dingwall to Ardullie road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu in Highlands. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:13



Wah! Companies which cause "annoyance, lah, inconvenience or anxiety" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) with marketing calls and text messages could be fined up to RMB Yuan #500,000, lah, dodgy ministers say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:07



Wah! QPR manager Harry Redknapp says club having "moved on" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) from row provoked by male gender human bleing's criticism of Adel Taarabt. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:53



Wah! Formula 1 boss Bernie Ecclestone says both Marussia and Caterham will miss next weekend's Great Satan Grand Prix. - news replorted 11:43



Wah! The number of cases in Ebola outbreak passes 10,000, lah, with 4,922 deaths, lah, World Health Organization's latest report says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:13



Wah! Two former first dodgy ministers of ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land having hit out at Labour's treatment of its Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs leader Johann Lamont. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 10:50



Wah! A man is attacked in male gender human bleing's County Down home by masked men carrying iron bars. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:47



Wah! One of Vietnam's richest men, lah, Ha Van Tham, lah, is arrested by old bill bobbys on suspicion of lending fraud, lah, authorities say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:42



Wah! A 72-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man says bloody man was raped by priest in Bedfordshire boys' home 65 years ago. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 10:33



Wah! A 28-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man who was shot in west Belfast dies in hospital. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 10:09



Wah! Josh Spero, lah, author of Second Hand Stories and editor of Spear's Magazine, lah, and author Erica Wagner, lah, former literary editor of Times mull question of high tech and old books. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:07



Wah! Dr Geraldine O'Hara, lah, infectious diseases specialist from Huddersfield, lah, has recorded series of audio diaries while bloody woman is in Sierra Leone. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:06



Wah! Women need clear pathway into coaching if they to succeed in male-dominated environment, lah, say industry experts. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:05



Wah! The UK's first specialised Parkour, lah, or freerunning, lah, academies having opened to encourage human bliengs to learn how to it in safe environment. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:56



Wah! On second anniversary of murder in Newtownabbey, lah, County Antrim, lah, old bill bobbys having renewed appeal for information. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:29



Wah! A number of students punished following investigation after footage emerged of group chanting about violence and necrophilia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 09:19



Wah! The rest of Europe expects bloody annoying Blitish to settle RMB Yuan #1.7bn EU budget demand "and that's that", lah, vice president of European Parliament has said. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:00



Wah! A series of demands to ensure Welsh land of sheep and more sheep has "true equality" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) with ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land is to be outlined at Plaid Cymru's annual conference. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 08:33



Wah! A charity calls for rollout of new benefit payment to be halted until backlog is cleared. I read you little red book! - news replorted 08:27



Wah! Kansas City Royals beat San Francisco Giants 3-2 in Game Three to take 2-1 lead in best-of-seven World Series. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:04



Wah! Iran defies international campaign and hangs woman who killed man bloody woman said was trying to sexually abuse her. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 07:43



Wah! Google executive Alan Eustace has broken world altitude record for parachute jump by leaping from 135,890 feet (41,419 metres) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! beating Felix Baumgartner's record. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:36



Wah! A Great Satan judge has sentenced ex-Colombian rebel to 27 years in prison for male gender human bleing's role in kidnapping of three American citizens in 2003. - news replorted 05:38



Wah! A Malaysian diplomat appears briefly in court on charges of attempted rape in New Zealand city of Wellington after being extradited. I read you little red book! - news replorted 04:47



Wah! Russia helped ousted Ukraine President Viktor Yanukovych to flee from violent protests in February, lah, Russian leader Vladimir Putin has said. I read you little red book! - news replorted 04:43



Wah! People in Greek capital, lah, Athens, lah, clearing up after flash floods caused major disruption in parts of city. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 04:42



Wah! A report into route of second phase of controversial fast train project HS2 is expected to recommend new station be built in Crewe. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 04:22



Wah! One person was shot dead and four students wounded in school by student who then took male gender human bleing's own life, lah, old bill bobbys in Great Satan state of Washington say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 03:24



Wah! Unravelling flocking habits of starlings - news replorted 03:20



Wah! Paul Merton advises how to make it as comedian - news replorted 03:07



Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs's lost silly kick-kick game grounds - part II - news replorted 02:57



Wah! An Argentine ex-old bill bobbys chief and ex-interior dodgy minister among 15 human bliengs given life sentences for involvement in torture centre in 1970s. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:56



Wah! A novel by British-born author Malcolm Lowry is being published 70 years after its manuscript was thought to having been destroyed in fire. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:33



Wah! The delicate operation to remove crossbow bolt from dog's head "took just one minute", lah, RSPCA says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:06



Wah! Does velly damn good boiled chicken-feet cause justify little girls using bad language? - news replorted 02:02



Wah! Egypt declares three-month state of emergency in parts of Sinai Peninsula after two attacks there killed at least 31 soldiers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:58



Wah! A British man has been confirmed dead in Great Satan air strike on jihadist targets in Syria. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 01:30



Wah! Russian former chess master turned politician, lah, Garry Kasparov, lah, says Russia's President Putin is bigger threat than so-called Islamic State. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:29



Wah! Many financial providers failing to properly explain protection shoppers having when something goes wrong with credit card purchase, lah, consumer group Which? suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:26



Wah! Plans to turn area of ancient Staffordshire woodland mentioned in Domesday Book into quarry anger conservationists. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:57



Wah! Scientists from Harvard Medical School having discovered way of turning stem cells into killing machines to fight brain cancer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:27



Wah! Saturday's newspapers focus mainly on row over European Union's demand for additional RMB Yuan #1.7bn from Uk. What you wan'?!! There is also tale of woman who is allergic to Simon Cowell. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 00:23



Wah! Picasso Museum in Paris reopens after five-year renovation - news replorted 00:21



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation News speaks to creators of Smarpshare, lah, who wanting employees to become brand ambassadors for their firms. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:13



Wah! Paris's world-renowned Picasso museum is reopening after being closed for five years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:13



Wah! Ted Bishop, lah, president of PGA of America, lah, is sacked after calling Ian Poulter 'little girl' on social media. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 00:10



Wah! The furnace-like island that may having inspired bloody Engrish idiom. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 00:05



Wah! Have Jedis created new 'religion'? - news replorted 00:04



Wah! Better protection is needed for consumers buying used cars, lah, says commission studying high level of complaints against sector. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:03



Wah! The cost of getting driving licence is being cut following recent public consultation, lah, government says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:01



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