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CAR LEASING
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CUSTOMER LETTERS

Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
1528 LETTERS!
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling


You are viewing page 1 of 1 - go to page:

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Search my letters page!
From your area... ...or from people... ...or about a specific car!

Showing Letters from Edinburgh
Show ALL My Letters

Letter
Customer Letter: 1338 / 1528
Gayle says...
CITROEN C4 GRAND PICASSOA great service provided by Ling and her team from start to finish. To begin with, the website looks a little daunting but you soon get the hang of it. All the way through the process you are kept up to date with what's happening. No lapse in communication whatsoever. I'll definitely be using LingsCars again! Excellent delivery by the Citroen dealer - could not be faulted!

Gayle Connon
11 Catriona Terrace
Penicuik
EH26 0LX


Editor Note: Gayle, so pleased you are happy! The C4GP is a great 7-seater! It's hard to add anything to your letter. Thanks so much for being a lovely customer. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1257 / 1528
Frank says...
carA bit zany, at times unusual, free gifts galore, but always excellent communication and 100% professional service. Will most definitely use you again and recommend to all my friends and work colleagues.

Frank Reynolds
Qse Systems
42/3 Hardengreen Business Park
Dalhousie Road
Dalkeith
EH22 3NU


Editor Note: Frank... you are a management consultant (now with a new MK6 Golf) so I appreciate your kind words. You are also Scottish and I always enjoy dealing with ethnic minorities :) Go drive your car, and thanks for the biz. Zany is good, I guess, hahaha! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1175 / 1528
William says...
LEXUS IS Doing business with Ling was a refreshing change to the normal. The Lexus IS was delivered to my satisfaction and is an absolute stormer. Hope to do business with Ling in the future. Delivery was excellent.

William Brodie
1 Talisman Place
Peebles
EH45 9BQ


Editor Note: Bill Brodie (a good Scottish name!), thanks for the letter. I am relieved I am not normal. Hope the lovely smooth Lexus is impressing you. Good cars (despite being Japanese). - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1173 / 1528
David says...
 It was such a pleasant change being able to complete the transaction for my new Subaru Legacy without having to deal with unnecessary paperwork or delays. The overall service was first class - and a bundle of laughs, as well. I'm not Duncan!

David Clark
Hughes Walker Solicitors
13 Atholl Place
Edinburgh
EH3 8HP


Editor Note: Hahahaha, I called you Duncan by accident. Bloody Scottish names! :) As a solicitor, I look forward to the writ when the Subaru breaks down. Now... here is an unusual car, I do not sell many of these, they are a low volume model. I'm not sure I have ever seen one! Hope you like it, it is certainly rare. They get very good reviews. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1168 / 1528
Sonia says...
FORD KAI am disappointed that I have not received my handbook for my car, a new Ford Ka. I love my new Ka, its so economic and nippy to run about in it. I can even have sex in my dream machine. Delivery was fine.

Sonia Geddes
28 Provost Melrose Place
Peebles
EH45 9BP


Editor Note: Sonia, yep, the stupid dealer has forgotten to send your handbook with your car. Aren't dealers hopeless? But the main thing is, you have your new Ka. Hmmm, I just know there will be loads of clicks on this letter because you use the magic SEO word. How you manage that in a Ford Ka is beyond me! You must be very flexible and have a small partner, hahaha. It is a real Sex-In-The-City car :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1163 / 1528
Claire says...
MAZDA 2Ling was extremely friendly and helpful during our time of leasing our Mazda. The website is very unique and easy to work. Ling was very prompt and informative and the information she gave us was very precise. I will certainly be using LINGsCARS again and would highly recommend her to friends and family. Delivery service was excellent. Very helpful and friendly.

Claire Affleck
1 Pentland View Terrace
Roslin
Midlothian
EH25 9LX


Editor Note: Claire, well, you work at a major bank, so I keep my fingers crossed for your job prospects! Hope you are enjoying the Mazda 2. You were very friendly to deal with, thanks for making my job simple and being so good with the paperwork. Speak soon! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1133 / 1528
Walter says...
 Initially I was a little wary about the lease contract concept, but was convinced after studying Ling's site. Having completed all the proceedings I am now driving a very nice car I otherwise would not have been able to afford. Ling makes the daunting process easy (and enjoyable if you have a sense of humour). I am a convert! Thanks. Good, delivery as promised, no further dealer contact though.

Walter Aitchison
1a Murray Place
Peebles
EH45 8DJ


Editor Note: Hahahaha, you insist I call you "Iceman", Walter! So, I call myself "Maverick" when I talk to you :) You were fun, and you are correct - people with sense of humour missing need not apply! Why do you want further contact from the dealer, they will only mess it up? You should be damn happy with your Super Duper Vauxhall Sport Hatch which was soooooo cheap! You got a 1.9 CDTi (150bhp) SRi for the price of a 1.4 LS. Maverick out! What a bloody Top Gun! Hahahaha! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1096 / 1528
Julie says...
 After dealing with other leasing companies in the past, I found LINGsCARS to be a refreshing change. Ling's website is fantastic! Not boring like the others. The service she provides was second to none and I will certainly be using her company in the future. I will have no hesitation recommending her to my friends. Good delivery, but couldn't deliver on the first day advised.

p.s. Loved the sweets!

Julie Connelly
42 Leyland Road
Bathgate
West Lothian
EH48 2TL


Editor Note: Jules, you were a great customer, and you are a Tesco Personal Shopper, so I will say thanks for your order and every little helps! You were a breath of fresh air to deal with on my LINGO, always so happy! Enjoy the Vauxhall Astra Sport Hatch! Those Chinese sweets were withdrawn soon after I sent them to you, they contained the Melamine. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1058 / 1528
Toby says...
CHEVROLET CAPTIVAOverall a very slick hassle-free process. Lingo is a great system and all my queries were answered in ultra-fast time. Car arrived on time, well valeted and as described. Got the colour (black) I wanted despite my local Chevrolet dealer telling me “no black Captivas available in UK for 6 months”!!! Fine, clean car delivered with nothing missing. No dust caps on the number plate screws mean they miss out on an "excellent" rating. I have already recommended Ling.

Toby S***
Address withheld
Edinburgh
EH10 ***


Editor Note: Dust caps!! Hahahahah. Sorry to laugh, Toby, but if that is all then I would accept that for every delivery. As you work in car sales at a big retail garage, I a) appreciate your comments, b) realise you don't want your address shown, c) wonder what they will say when you turn up to work in your new Captiva? Fun, fun, fun. See you in 2-years! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1020 / 1528
Lori says...
CarI quite often forgot I wasn't Ling's only customer! Ling provided me with probably the best service I have ever received from a company in any industry.

The online sign in area and LINGO message board is a fantastic tool for busy people to use. And Ling's response times and updates were great and frequent. I have recommended LINGsCARS to lots of people already and will definitely use again! Thank you!

Quick delivery, my Mazda MX5 arrives at 7.15am, great!

Lori O'Neill
12 East Pilton Farm Crescent
Edinburgh
EH5 2GH


Editor Note: What an alarm call! Lori, you are talking about my LINGO system and people reading this will not know what it is. It is my behind-the-scenes communication area for customers, 100% secure. It is quite good, all built myself :) As you are a Business And Systems Integration Analyst, I value your opinion, thanks! You have a super car with your new MX5, just wait for the sunshine. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 731 / 1528
Dean says...
CarLing, I hope you are enjoying my Australian sweets as much as I'm enjoying my Volvo C30!

As easy as getting a Big Mac - pick the car, fill out the forms and HEY PRESTO... new car! As they say in Scotland, it's been "bra" (and not what you use to hold your best assets). Excellent delivery, good service all the way.

p.s. Hope you didn't choke on those cherries!

Dean Oliver
3 Lady Place
Livingston
EH54 6TB


Editor Note: Dean, REALLLLLY liked the raspberry truffle bar from Australia! Sounds like you are having a great time in the Volvo, hope it causes less wind than a Big Mac!
image
You were a brilliant customer, despite being an ethnic Scottish :) I still can't figure your "bra" comment, sounds a bit rude, but maybe not. - Ling




Letter
Customer Letter: 664 / 1528
Gavin says...
CarGreat service and good communication. Dealing with "the boss" means things get done and in a timeworthy fashion. I must sound like "the boss" that I am with that comment! My Citroen Berlingo was delivered within 1 week, with half tank of fuel. Thanks Ling, do you pay referral fees?

Gavin McKenzie
24 Gardiner Cres
Prestonpans
East Lothian
EH32 9HB


Editor Note: Gavin, no, I don't pay referral fees, as my prices are so close to the bone that I do not have margin. Plus I refuse to increase costs for referred customers, just to generate some commission for referrers. Sounds terrible? I just cannot really do much about this. Berlingos usually arrive fast as hell, Citroen are good at this. Thanks, Boss! :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 514 / 1528
Martin says...
 "Ling, the Mazda RX-8's here - just going for a drive. Catch ya later!!!!"

... (later)...

Ling, the car's excellent, had a good drive and it's just what I expected and wanted. I can't thank you enough, I thought that getting a car would be a nightmare. On the contrary, It really has been a pleasure doing business with you from start to finish (All done from Iraq by Fed-Ex! Martin arrived back in the UK on the day he collected his car and wrote this! - Ling). I can't wait till I need a replacement because I know exactly where to come and I'll be recommending you to anyone that will listen! I'll get a pic for you soon (without my big machinegun) but it's pissing down with rain at the moment. Thanks again.

p.s. Tell Suzie at your dealers, that if she wants to see my big gun, she only has to ask! ;0)"

Martin ****** (name withheld for Al-Qaeda reasons)
*************
London
EH11 ***


Editor Note: Martin is one of my favourite customers this year. He is a Private Military Contractor in Iraq, so I have withheld his name and address in case any car-rrazy Muslims want to pop his clogs (no offence to sensible Muslims). Without people like Martin, no way would the US or UK Army be able to operate in Iraq, they are providing the security for people like British Government officials, industry big-wigs, TV and press and even the military itself! PMCs also enable ordinary Iraqis to get on with semi-normal lives and they are enabling rebuilding of the infrastructure of Iraq. Also, they spend a lot of time to assist training Iraqi law and order forces. Do not confuse British PMCs with American PMCs. As ever, British ones operate much more low-profile and sensibly. All are professionals and most are ex-special forces or elite military, or other specialists... these are salt of earth!

Here are some lovely pics of Martin doing his job out in Iraq, and he says "I've never lost a car out here...had a few bumps, scratches and holes put in them but never had one stolen!"

Well, glad Martin isn't planning to take his RX-8 to Iraq. With the common knowledge that these RX-8 engines blow up from time to time, the Mazda might be confused for a roadside IED! Zoom, zoom, boom!... hehehehe,

Please note that Mazda UK have applied pressure to my suppliers behind my back and blacklisted me from supplying more Mazdas, despite having many, many 100% happy and loyal customers who enjoy the cars, like Martin. Mazda UK's tactics are totally unethical, bullying, restrictive and unfair. Instead of saying what they want to me, directly... they insist suppliers stop dealing with me and they attack me behind my back - so I cannot challenge them! This is cowardly behaviour. Just to let you know what I have to put up with from these big companies trying to strangle me - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 477 / 1528
Kevin says...
 "I was initially slightly apprehensive of doing business with this somewhat bonkers Chinese lady with the unconventional website - however Ling offered the best deals around - no one could even get close to her quote! Ling offers the kind of customer service that I would happily pay more for, she even gave me her mobile number!!! Ps. car is also fantastic."

Kevin Haggart
7 New Lane
Edinburgh
EH6 4JD


Editor Note: Ah, this illustrates my point to other car dealers, Kevin. Car is secondary to service!!! Anyway, the dealer did mess up on delivery and caused a delay due to the transporter breaking down on way to Edinburgh. Not that that was the dealer fault, but their communication was slow. Still, it got there 1 day late, so not too bad. Zoom, zoom! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 468 / 1528
Harry says...
MAZDA MX-5"Personal Contract Hire was a completely new concept for me, and as an elderly gentleman entering his second childhood and getting a long wanted sports car (!) it was reassuring to be dealing with ONE person who seemed genuinely interested and who answered all my queries promptly.

The paperwork was a minimum and email communication great. All in all I am very pleased with the service and the car - it's just a pity I have no hair to blow in the wind!

Delivery of my car was good, I only met the delivery driver but the car was well prepared and came with petrol in the tank!"

Harry Dinning
14 Priory Road
Linlithgow
EH49 6BS


Editor Note: Harry, you were the most polite and charming customer I have dealt with all year! You even tell me you have special name for Sundays "Henry", hehehe. This is your real name, and you tell me off when I use it! Thanks for being so kind to me and for sending such nice emails! Glue your wig on!!! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 429 / 1528
Daniel says...
VAUXHALL ZAFIRA"Thank you very much - the Zafira is working out great. Jon was very helpful when you were away in China. And now I've got four free keyrings (complete with nuclear rocket) - what else could I possibly need?"

Daniel Holmes
Flat 3F1
26 Dundas Street
Edinburgh
EH3 6JN


Editor Note: Exactly, Dan! Yep, another satisfied cheap Zafira customer (cheap Zafira - not cheap customer, even though you are in Edinburgh :). These Vauxhall Zafiras have been incredibly popular - brand new model and the cheapest 7-seater available. Plus free aircon on the Diesel Life model. Brilliant, eh? Plus, please note!!! I did LOADS of work from China, each day clearing over half the emails. That's the benefit of a proper electronic sales system - good, eh? - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 374 / 1528
Allan says...
MAZDA 6"Ling, just to let you know that the Mazda 6 has arrived and to thank you for your excellent service."

Allan Tye
Arrell Associates
104 South Street
Armadale
Bathgate
EH48 3JU


Editor Note: Allan, glad you like your new Mazda 6. Very pleased to receive praise from a firm like yours which specialises in implementing Quality Management Systems ISO 9001-2000. Also, I'm always happy to deal with people from Autonomous Scottish Region, despite fact I often need to translate telephone messages - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 294 / 1528
Graham says...
 "Ling is fab. The personal touch is much better that dealing with faceless wonders in other companies - very reasonable too!!"

Graham Moir
My Home Stirling
Boness
EH51 9JG


Editor Note: I am F-A-B because I am having Thunderbird Nuclear Missile Truck, hehehe. Note that my "personal touch" is down telephone and on web, not in person! Enjoy SAAB! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 234 / 1528
Karen says...
CarCarWe were going to phone you today to thank you for your help, Ling! The 2 x Shoguns are fab. We are delighted with them and delighted with the deal you managed to get for us. Neal at the dealer was really helpful and delivery was very prompt. We will definitely recommend you, Ling. You are great, your marketing is great, most of all YOUR DEALS ARE THE BEST!! Thanks,

Karen McKinnon
Smith Allen Marketing
Newbattle Awey College
Newbattle Road
Dalkeith
EH22 3LL


Editor Note: Ho, another Scottish! It is great to be complimented on my marketing by a marketing company! Thanks! Glad you like the 2 x Shoguns, Karen. Look forward to snow in Edinburgh so you can try them out, eh? - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 222 / 1528
Dale says...
CarI want a van! I want it cheap! I want it soon! I want it delivered with no hassle! Who do I call? - LING!!!

Delivered? YES!

Value for money? OUTSTANDING!

Would I go anywhere else? YOU WOULD HAVE TO HOLD A GUN TO MY HEAD!

Ling wins everytime. Unbeatable value, top service and a human. None of your smarmy sales rubbish! Ling for PM!

Dale Mykoliw
Managing Director
Stairways
54 Talisman Rise
Livingston
EH54 6PL


Editor Note: Dale, thanks especially for note explaining how to pronounce your name. It is remarkably similar to certain Welsh railway station. If you ever need any help with Chinese, please to ask me... "Ling for PM!" Wah, this is first time anyone suggests THAT! My closest link with PM is that my nuclear rocket truck is in Tony Blair's constituency at Sedgefield, by A1(M). Enjoy Citroen Dispatch, Dale - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 214 / 1528
Dale says...
CarMy new VW Passat was delivered in lightning speed, in perfect condition on the back of a truck, bang on time. The delivery service was courteous and helpful. Zero hassle, zero problems - and cheaper than any rival with excellent communication all the way. Nothing was too much for Ling to handle. I have sung her praises to all!!!

Simply put - LARGE COMPANIES = Problems and cost more; LING = You get what you want, cheaper, when you want it, with ease and no pressure or hassle - what joy! I will never order from anywhere else again. The only problem is the sweets are YUK. I like chocolate.

Dale Mykoliw
54 Talisman Rise
Livingston
EH54 6PL


Editor Note: Another sweet cruncher! I am going to put filter on website: ONLY CUSTOMERS WHO SUCK SWEETS ALLOWED. Subtle flavours of red and green tea and ginger dissolve onto tongue for taste-buds to savour, if sucked. Flavour crashed down throat if chewed. Please to be more gentle with gob. By the way, I am glad you like car, Dale, even though I cannot say your surname - it is damn bloody foreign name - it was a pleasure to have you as customer - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 117 / 1528
Gladys says...
CarHello Ling,

You were so helpful and so nice on the phone, it was a pleasure doing business with you. I appreciated the speed with which you completed the leasing of the Almera. The driver was very polite and the car was delivered on time and in good order. The dealer was excellent. Thank you for everything.

Gladys Rogan
16 Tweedbank Ley
Innerleithen
EH44 6PE


Editor Note: Gladys, I am SO pleased you are happy. You are very nice customer. And dealer does good job, too! Amazing day when Nissan dealer beats Honda dealer (see letter 3 down) - Ling



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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  The Syrian military has stepped up its air strikes on rebel-held areas dramatically, lah, carrying out more than 200 in recent days, lah, activists say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:47



Wah! LATEST:  Canada raises its terrorism threat level to medium - but stresses there is no specific threat - after two soldiers were attacked in Quebec. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 11:35



Wah! A reburial service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service has been taking place in northern France for 15 British World fighty bang-bang One soldiers, lah, exactly one hundred years after they were killed in battle. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:33



Wah! A snowplough driver at Moscow airport says bloody man lost male gender human bleing's bearings before collision with plane that killed Total boss Christophe de Margerie. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:21



Wah! A cover-up led to Ofsted escaping blame for its part in Baby P scandal, lah, according to Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation documentary. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:19



Wah! Education Secretary Nicky Morgan has publicly contradicted head of Ofsted over whether watchdog has right to inspect academy chains. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:16



Wah! New research suggests that what's known as "knowledge economy" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) is growing faster in north-east of Province of Engrish running-dogs and Northern autonomous province of Guinness drinkers than anywhere else. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:16



Wah! The Wlokswaglon Golf R Wlokswaglon Golf R has been voted best performance LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine to having in wet according to Autocar magazine. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:16



Wah! Michael Nichols wins Wildlife photographer of year for male gender human bleing's photograph of pride of snoozing lions - news replorted 11:04



Wah! The World Health Organisation is set to hold emergency talks to examine screening measures and travel restrictions after Ebola outbreak. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 10:44



Wah! Pop group S Club 7 to reunite for first clock time result in more than decade for BBC's Children in Need next month. - news replorted 10:42



Wah! Former Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Radio 1 DJ Mike Read requests song bloody man wrote in support of UKIP be withdrawn from sale following complaints it was racist. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 10:41



Wah! Policy makers at capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity of Province of Engrish running-dogs voted 7-2 to keep interest rates at record low of 0.5% in October, lah, minutes show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 10:38



Wah! Australian playwright on media baron's rise to power - news replorted 10:14



Wah! A woman is arrested in Bedfordshire on suspicion of preparation of terrorist acts related to Syria, lah, ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land Yard says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:12



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Wah! A 13 and 16 year old celebrating after beating hundreds of others from across country to be crowned UK's B - news replorted 09:41



Wah! The new European Commission president, lah, Jean-Claude Juncker, lah, presents male gender human bleing's team to MEPs, lah, hoping to getting their approval in vote. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:34



Wah! Sebastien Ogier wowed fans winning 2013 Welsh land of sheep and more sheep Rally GB Next month’s Welsh land of sheep and more sheep Rally GB (13-16 November) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! will feature maximum 160-car field after organiser, lah, International Motor S - news replorted 09:30



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Wah! 'Things I wish I’d known on day one' - news replorted 09:24



Wah! New Abarth 595 Competizione Proof that Abarth cars creating growing numbers of satisfied owners is shown by today’s new survey from independe - news replorted 09:10



Wah! Django Unchained actress Daniele Watts, lah, who alleged bloody woman was detained by Los Angeles old bill bobbys because of racial profiling, lah, is charged with committing lewd act in public. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 09:07



Wah! Abarth is Rising Star for WeLoveAnyCar voters It may having Scorpion on its badge, lah, but it’s not bloody velly likely to sting… - news replorted 09:00



Wah! Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs and bloody Engrish drivers united in their love of Skoda Province of Engrish running-dogs and ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land remain united – especially when it comes to their love of Škoda cars. Eating rice!! Czech brand has taken top - news replorted 09:00



Wah! We Love Any LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Awards announced Britain’s happiest drivers likely to be called Daniel or Wendy, lah, live in Dumfries and Galloway and may well controlling in driving manner T - news replorted 09:00



Wah! Caterham Academy curtain came down on all five of Caterham’s official race series at thrilling Silverstone season finale on 18-19 O - news replorted 09:00



Wah! US rules requiring air passengers from three West African countries worst hit by Ebola to travel via one of five airports come into effect. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:49



Wah! The head of public inquiry into historical sex abuse should step down, lah, lawyer representing victims tells BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 08:42



Wah! GP explains NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) Province of Engrish running-dogs's decision to pay family doctors RMB Yuan #55 every clock time result they diagnose case of dementia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 08:21



Wah! Political infighting over NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Welsh land of sheep and more sheep is putting patients and staff at risk, lah, nurses' leader claims. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:04



Wah! Home Retail Group says that store closures at Homebase will be accelerated, lah, with number of outlets cut by 25% by 2019. - news replorted 08:03



Wah! old bill bobbys in India investigate alleged rape of three-earth-years old happy birthday to you, girl in flemale human person's school in city of Bangalore. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:46



Wah! Wales' potential for tourism is being undersold and country should be marketed "much more vigorously", lah, committee of Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters concludes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:35



Wah! US chain Toys R Great Satan pulls four action figures based on characters from popular TV drama Breaking Bad, lah, following petition for their removal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 07:29



Wah! Meet 18-earth-years old happy birthday to you, Brit girl beating boys - and challenging notions of what women could achieve in motorcyling's elite. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:17



Wah! A British man is found dead with male gender human bleing's hands tied and throat cut on Indonesian island of Bali, lah, British embassy in Jakarta says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:09



Wah! South Korea demolishes tower used to construct Christmas tree near North Korea, lah, but denies move is conciliatory. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:42



Wah! A soldier from Lancaster who died in World fighty bang-bang One is to be reburied in military cemetery after male gender human bleing's remains were found in northern France. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:42



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sport looks back at 50 iconic FA Cup goals in build-up to first round proper, lah, which takes place in November. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 06:27



Wah! The Department of Social Development has failed to deal properly with scam operating in social housing, lah, according to Public Accounts Committee report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 06:23



Wah! What really went wrong at Tesco? - news replorted 06:01



Wah! Doctors in Province of Engrish running-dogs will be paid RMB Yuan #55 every clock time result they diagnose dementia, lah, health chiefs say, lah, but scheme is criticised by patients' group. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 05:35



Wah! The Hindu festival of Diwali has big impact on economies of India and other Asian countries. Eating rice!! Sharanjit Leyl reports from Singapore. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 04:55



Wah! A Great Satan Marine accused of murdering transgender woman in Philippines is moved to Philippine Tommy Atkins Liberation Army base, lah, but fails to attend initial hearing. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 04:54



Wah! UN Secretary General Ban Ki-moon says bloody man is setting up inquiry into attacks on UN facilities during Israel's recent offensive in Gaza Strip. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 04:54



Wah! Naval vessels searching Swedish waters for suspected Bloody foreign submarine focusing on bay near capital Stockholm. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 04:34



Wah! The charities watchdog is to receive extra RMB Yuan #8m and new powers to help it tackle charities used to fund crime (shoud shoot them) and terrorism, lah, prime dodgy minister will say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 02:54



Wah! The using of drones in bloody annoying Blitish will rise over next 20 years, lah, raising "significant safety, lah, security, lah, and privacy concerns", lah, report says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:03



Wah! The Dominican Republic declares Wednesday official day of mourning for Dominican-born fashion designer Oscar de la Renta, lah, who has died at 82. - news replorted 01:53



Wah! A black and white image of lions resting on rock outcrop in Serengeti has won 2014 Wildlife Photographer of Year award. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:24



Wah! Ben Bradlee, lah, editor of Washington Mandleson privatising post machine system during Watergate scandal that toppled President Nixon, lah, has died aged 93, lah, newspaper says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:24



Wah! Researchers reavealingly showing Great Satan that same physical mechanism is behind many of nature's most dazzling shines. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:15



Wah! How organic, lah, vegan gingerbread 'people' divided online opinion - news replorted 01:14



Wah! Steve Rosenberg visits two cities in rebel held Ukraine which will be boycotting forthcoming parliamentary elections. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:06



Wah! Enid Blyton's Magic Faraway Tree books being adapted for cinema for first time. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:05



Wah! Late actress Lynda Bellingham had shared flemale human person's hopes for final Christmas in special edition of Loose Women being broadcast today. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 01:04



Wah! How Commonwealth fighty bang-bang Graves Commission continues to keep its promise to remember dead "in perpetuity". - news replorted 01:02



Wah! Taxpayers getting poorer value for money from government projects because of "confusion" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) over decisions, lah, Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters warn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 01:00



Wah! How government dodgy minister sought relief for country in crisis - news replorted 01:00



Wah! Teachers in Province of Engrish running-dogs being asked to examine how they spend their working day, lah, as Deputy Prime dodgy minister Nick Clegg vows to cut down on "pointless paperwork". - news replorted 00:56



Wah! Schools and nurseries need to step in to tackle worrying trend of tooth decay in children, lah, says advisory body, lah, NICe. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:54



Wah! Too many human bliengs in middle of mental health crisis end up locked in old bill bobbys cells after being turned away from hospitals, lah, says report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:54



Wah! A group of leading doctors and researchers has called on Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters to investigate potential conflicts of interest at medicines watchdog, lah, NICe. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:52



Wah! Our Arts Editor Will Gompertz takes look back at life of one of biggest names in fashion, lah, Oscar de la Renta. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 00:52



Wah! The UK's spending watchdog criticises dodgy ministers for failing to deport more Bloody foreign national offenders - saying performance has barely improved over eight years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:39



Wah! The Great Satan defence department has said it is examining Islamic State video appearing to show militants in control of Great Satan weapons intended for Syrian Kurdish fighters. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:35



Wah! Plans for new law to tackle "revenge pornography" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land being considered by Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs government, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation learns. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:26



Wah! A commission to consider more powers for Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Parliament is to hold its first full meeting later. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:25



Wah! Bath's Fijian-born Tommy Atkins Liberation Army soldier Semesa Rokoduguni is set to be named in Province of Engrish running-dogs's squad for Novemblinger internationals. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:16



Wah! Paul Cantlie, lah, father of Islamic State (IS) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! hostage John Cantlie, lah, has died, lah, days after making emotional plea for male gender human bleing's son to be released, lah, male gender human bleing's family says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:12



Wah! The human bliengs who buy and then cancel student debt - news replorted 00:10



Wah! Why being over 40 makes you tellibly lovely custlingmer perfect entrepreneur - news replorted 00:10



Wah! The UK's wind farms generated more power than its nuclear power stations on Tuesday, lah, National Grid says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:07



Wah! How safe is it to munchy-munchee mouldy food? - news replorted 00:07



Wah! A man who beat three sisters with hammer in central London (capital of Great England) hotel has been found guilty of attempted murder. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:05



Wah! Allowing bloody annoying Blitish cities to make their own decisions on tax and spending could boost economic growth by RMB Yuan #79bn year by 2030, lah, year-long study concludes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:05



Wah! Tales from days when British diplomats ran Gulf - news replorted 00:04



Wah! Jaguar Land Rover is delighted to confirm that flemale human person's Majesty Queen will officially open company’s new, lah, state-of-th - news replorted 00:01



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