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CUSTOMER LETTERS

Customer car leasing letters    shout about 1350 customer letters!    Customer car leasing letters
1528 LETTERS!
More customer letters than any other car sales site IN THE WHOLE WORLD! - Ling


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Letter
Customer Letter: 1531 / 1528
Keith says...
AUDI A6 AVANTWhile getting my new Audi A6 Avant, I noticed that Ling may be bonkers but she does everything she says she'll do, and does it well.

Keith Willmore
1 Hunts Yard
Massingham Drive
Earls Colne
CO6 2TD


Editor Note: Thanks for calling me "bonkers", Keith. From a Barrister, that is appreciated. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1514 / 1528
Gareth says...
TOYOTA PRIUSLing

Thanks so much for the fantastic service and our lovely new car. You are the best - at everything: best prices, best customer service and best for free Chinese noodle lunch! We tell everyone we know not to buy but to car lease from LINGsCARS.com.

It would be great if every business was as easy to deal with, reliable and offered such great customer service as you all at LINGsCARS.com. Forget looking elsewhere. Car lease from Ling! I'm happy for you to post this in your comments section for the world to see.

Gareth Prendergast
Address Withheld
Downham Market
PE38 ***


Editor Note: Hey World, look at this lovely letter! :) Gareth, you are now officially green motoring champion, buzzing around in the quiet Prius. I have withheld your address as you have sensitive military job, but lovely to see someone from a lovely little Norfolk town. I was in Downham Market one month ago, it is a great place. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1500 / 1528
Mike says...
CITROEN BERLINGOLing,

You must be doing something right as I am waiting for delivery of our 6th vehicle from you. Good dealer service.

Mike Donovan
Jensen Security Systems Ltd
15 Orton Enterprise Centre
Bakewell Road, Orton Southgate
Peterborough
PE2 6BY


Editor Note: Hahahaha, and you get sick of writing these letters, eh, Mike? You are one of my best customers :) Keep the orders coming! Enjoy the little van. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1494 / 1528
Gareth says...
TOYOTA PRIUSI would just like to thank you and your team once again for the new Toyota Prius that we have now got. Your teams professionalism and understanding made the whole process completely painless. The delivery could have been extremely stressful with me not being in the country and my wife in full time work - but you pulled out all the stops to make is convenient for us.

When the time comes we will be happy to lease another car from you; safe in the knowledge that you put the customer first. Thanks Ling.

Gareth Prendergast
Address Withheld
Downham Market
PE38 ***


Editor Note: Gareth, as you are a highly qualified RAF operative, I withhold your address for security. I would hate Osama to bother you :) The Prius is a tremendous car and should go for miles on batteries as your place is flat I think. You and your wife were super-duper to deal with. Thanks so much for kind letter. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1488 / 1528
David says...
 A bubbly, fizzy, garish website packed with more information than I have found on any website. Backed up by a personal, friendly staff. Will certainly will use Ling again. Dealer Service – EXCELLENT.

David Gethings
3 Fenleigh Close
Waterbeach
Cambridge
CB25 9RA


Editor Note: And you had a bubbly, fizzy car, too. An Alfa 159! Powerful Lusso model with extra 17" diamond effect flat spoke alloys in Black. Nice. Hope you have a good local Alfa dealer as they can be curate's eggs. But the deal was great fun to sort out with you, thanks for kind letter! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1477 / 1528
Karen says...
FORD FIESTAI found the whole process surprisingly easy and refreshingly friendly. I'm also happy that I got a good deal on my car. We loved your extra touches, especially the sweets. Delivery was excellent, very prompt and professional.

Karen Mcnulty
1 Greenacres Drive
Bourne
PE10 0FQ


Editor Note: Brilliant! Bourne was one of the very first towns I visited when I came to the UK 12 years ago, so I know it well. Glad everything went smoothly with the Fiesta Titanium, you have a lovely car there! See you in 3 years, Karen! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1476 / 1528
Michael says...
 The Audi is the third vehicle from your company. Your service and the car are both excellent.

Dealer Service – TERRIBLE. The car was dropped off and left without any instruction as to what button did what and even how to start it.

Michael Donovan
Jensen Security Systems Ltd
15 Orton Enterprise Centre
Bakewell Road, Orton Southgate
Peterborough
PE2 6BY


Editor Note: Well, I know the answer is to turn the key, but yes, that is terrible. There is a big gap between my service and the dealer service, eh? I am really sorry about this. However, tyou continue to order cars and vans and have another 3 vehicles on order. So I guess you forgive me for the daft dealer. Continue ordering, Mike! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1443 / 1528
Samantha says...
FORD FIESTALing and her colleagues are absolutely fantastic, a tad crazy but above all know their stuff! They answer queries at the speed of lightning and make the whole process of leasing fun and exciting. I can't praise them high enough and would definitely recommend Ling. Excellent delivery, delivery really helpful, knowledgeable and friendly.

Samantha Etheridge
133 Saturn Road
Ipswich
IP1 5PS


Editor Note: Great stuff, pleased you had such a good delivery of your new Fiesta, Sam. Thanks for the comments, you are very kind. Apologies for the "tad" craziness, but otherwise, I get bored :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1426 / 1528
Mark says...
CITROEN C5 TOURERHi Ling, a delightful transaction for my new Citroen C5 Tourer and will definitely use you again. It all was smooth and effortless. Love the bribery of sweets and money. Pity the money was worthless but as they say, it's the thought that counts. Love the comparison to burgers, great idea, lose weight and have a new car.

Mark Cook
239 Wroxham Road
Norwich
NR7 8AQ


Editor Note: Smooth and effortless, like the new C5? :) Lovely cars! Hey!!!! - the money is not worthless, it is Chinese Yuan and it is worth loads now against a devalued UK £££. Bribery is good, just like being back in China! My Big Mac index annoys McDonald's, but so what... it makes their burgers look expensive! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1409 / 1528
Justyn says...
PEUGEOT 308LINGsCARS was a pleasure to use - quick and prompt. All slightly wacky but made a mundane chore far more fun, and free sweets too!! Recommended. Delivery good but no info given re Peugeot 308 when delivered.

Justyn Campbell
The Blue Lion
74 Main Street
Hardwick
Cambridge
CB23 7QU


Editor Note: Hmmm, Justyn, I have kicked the supplier for the lazy delivery. They should always take time to go through the car - not to do so is bad. However, regarding the rest of the service, I am so glad you are happy and that you thought dealing with me a pleasure. Wacky is good :) (I think so anyway, it brightens up the day). Thanks for letter, here is one about The Blue Lion, your pub/restaurant (the village's only pub):



"What a great pub, we were made to feel welcome from the moment we walked in the door. The food was excellent and at reasonable prices. We had been told about the landlady's sheep and encountered them when they came up to the conservatory and knocked on the window. We will definitely return!"

You sound Baaaa-rking, Justyn, hahaha! - Ling




Letter
Customer Letter: 1376 / 1528
Emma says...
FORD FIESTAWhat fantastic personal service! Great to know whenever I have a question or query, someone always at the end of the Lingo system to help and advise. Would highly recommend and knocks spots off the big boys! Well done Ling and gang! Good delivery, great service and the driver was very obliging.

Emma Parsons
24 Sperling Drive
Haverhill
CB9 9SH


Editor Note: Not TOO obliging I hope? Hehe, hope he got home in one piece! You have a lovely new Fiesta Titanium to bomb around in now Emma, all alloys and loads of kit. Thanks for the great comments, I appreciate them! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1336 / 1528
Martin says...
 Hey Ling! You were great once again during our recent encounter, and the second car you have supplied me is brilliant too!! Car arrived very early on the agreed date - perfect! Thanks for all your help and once again a faultless service! I have passed your details on to loads of colleagues.

p.s. - Does anyone else own a Koleos? I still haven't seen any more on the road!!

Martin Roberts
166 Old London Road
Marks Tey
Colchester
CO6 1EJ


Editor Note: Errr, to my knowledge Regie Renault are in the doldrums with barely half the market share of a year ago. They have only sold one Koleos; to some mug in Essex. I think it was white with chrome wheel trims. Hope you enjoy it, hahahahaha! As you are a repeating customer, I won't be TOO cruel, Martin. :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1333 / 1528
Jensen says...
CITROEN BERLINGOHello Ling. The service on ordering to the delivery of the Berlingo van was great. The noodle were tastless and the Chinese polo mints were in pieces. Delivery good, no problems.

Jensen Security Systems Ltd
15 Orton Enterprise Centre
Bakewell Road, Orton Southgate
Peterborough
PE2 6BY


Editor Note: Well, that's the problem with Chinese Polo mints, they come from China and the ChinaPost is just not as good as the Royal Mandelson. These are bargain vans, for the price they are wonderful. Hope it does really good service installing alarms for you! You can add peanut butter to the noodles if you want some delicious flavour. Just don't stray too far from a toilet! Hahaha - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1309 / 1528
Deborah says...
VOLVO V70I would recommend Lingscars to anyone. You made the whole experience of leasing a car enjoyable from beginning to end! You made us laugh when filling out the forms, which has to be a first.... Your website is hilarious. Lingo is really efficient and easy to use. I would def use you again. Excellent delivery of my new V70 Estate.

Deborah Barlow
Valley Farm
Valley Road
Battisford
IP14 2HN


Editor Note: Surprisingly, Debs, you are not an Antique Dealer, but a "desk manager" whatever that is!!! Usually these big Volvo estates have very specific customers. But I hope you enjoy it. Thanks so much for the kind comments, especially about the LINGO... I am very proud of that. Filling out forms has to be one of the worst things about the Internet, so I try to spice them up a bit. Too much for some people, but I ignore the moaners :) Glad you liked everything. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1255 / 1528
Susan says...
 Hi Ling, the car is superb and your service was fantastic!!! This Astra Sport Hatch is the first car we have had on contract hire and also the first brand-new car we have had. We will be back for our next car when the contract is over! Keep up the good work. Excellent delivery.

Susan Ashby
28a Station Road
Clenchwarton
Kings Lynn
PE344DG


Editor Note: Sue, thanks. It's always a pleasure to help someone into a brand new car for the first time. I'm pleased you found my service to be good, I do try my best. Thanks so much for kind letter. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1236 / 1528
Darren says...
SEAT LEONThis is the first time I have gone trough the process of renting a car. Ling made this whole experience less confusing. She is a joy to do business with and I would gladly go throgh the whole process again. Excellent delivery, well handled, very good.

Darren Challender
25 Stocker Way
St Neots
PE19 2HA


Editor Note: Darren, you have a cheap Seat Leon for the next 2-years. Hope you enjoy it. It was great to deal with you, you were a very responsive customer. Take care! I want you back soon... - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1206 / 1528
Katie says...
 Our new Mazda 3 is the second car we have got through LINGsCARS.com. Brilliant and quick service. We particularly liked the new LINGO system. Excellent delivery, our Mazda arrived when expected with no problems.

Katie Smyth
86 Lackford Close
Brundall
Norwich
NR13 5NL


Editor Note: Hey! Katie, you came back for a second car! That's great :). So happy you love the LINGO system, I get loads of great feedback about that. It works REALLY will :) See you in a couple of years, again. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1196 / 1528
John says...
 Don't be fooled by the unusual website or light hearted correspondence you get from Ling. She is well organised and determined that her customers receive a great deal with the minimum of fuss. Having dealt with other leasing companies I would have no hesitation in recommending Ling to anybody who wants a good deal on a new car. A pleasant experience which I look forward to repeating in two years.

Delivery was good with a free set of mats supplied.

John Burman
10 Pintail Drive
Bradwell
Great Yarmouth
NR31 8JQ


Editor Note: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagggggh! Don't tell everyone about my mats. I can't remember why I sent them free, but there was a reason. Whatever, you are happy chappy :) Have a great time in your Mazda 3. Thanks for comments! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1176 / 1528
Paul says...
FORD FOCUSLing is HOT!!! Great communicator and cars supplied at best prices. Delivery of my new Focus 2.0 TDCi Titanium was good.

Paul Childs
Norfolk Street Post Office
Norwich Street
Wisbech
PE13 2LE


Editor Note: Norfolk Street Post Office on NORWICH Street? I'm confused; Well, anyone in and around Wisbech who wants to cash their pension... see Paul, if you can find him! He sells all sorts from stamps to string. No wonder you think I am HOT, that stuff on the stamps you lick contains drugs, I think. Thanks for letter. There was no stamp on it. Glad to see you have SOME job benefits :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1166 / 1528
Philip says...
 Fantastic service!!

Ling uses an innovative way of providing this service - and it all comes with a big smile too! Being the cheapest supplier for my new Volvo C30 is just a bonus! Delivery was good.

Philip Gilbert
Beans Coffee Stop Limited
1 New Street
Oundle
PE8 4EA


Editor Note: Kevin, I drink a coffee to you, hahaha. But, you know Chinese prefer tea! Thanks for the lovely letter, if I am ever in Oundle (hmmm, some hope) I will drop in and have a cappucino with extra chocolatey bits and a 99 flake, please. Get driving your smart new Volvo! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1151 / 1528
Robert says...
FORD FOCUSDealing with Ling has been a blast. Her service and professionalism has been 100% and I'm glad I held back my initial reservations when I saw her website for the first time. The leasing process was doodle and Ling was very accommodating to my specific needs. She's a star and I thank her very much - but not for the rank sweets - bleurgh. Good delivery, the Focus is a great car, but I had to have a problem fixed in the first week.

Robert Wood
53 Durham Way
Thetford
IP24 1DU


Editor Note: Hahaha, well, I don't build the things, Robby! If I did then you would not have problems. I am so glad it has all been a blast. Fun is what it should be, getting a car should be enjoyable, eh? The sweets are poisonous, I agree - you ATE them? Hahaha! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1135 / 1528
Darren says...
 It was a pleasure ordering my car from Ling. The whole process was extremely easy and she explained things very simply. Everything went seamlessly with very little effort from me. Her crazy sense of humour added to the experience! Not only was she the cheapest, LINGsCARS were hands down the best leasing company I have dealt with. The new Lingo online web system made things much easier. I would definitely do business with them again and have recommended Ling to various colleagues and friends. Delivered the car (Vauxhall Antara) on time and in perfect condition - excellent!

Darren ****
Address Withheld
Ipswich
IP3 ***


Editor Note: Darren, you are an IT Consultant, so I very much appreciate the comments about my Lingo system. I think you appreciate the amount of work I put into it. You have a massively good Granite Black car for a massively cheap price. Hope you enjoy. Really, thanks so much for comments. - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1092 / 1528
Samuel says...
FIAT PANDABeing the first time that I had leased a car, I had lots of questions which you answered quickly and clearly, in fact you were very caring and supportive all the way. I am really pleased with my new Fiat Panda and I promise to recommend your company to my friends. Thanks very much Ling I look forward to dealing with you again in the future. Good delivery, efficient and prompt.

Samuel Davis
111 Front St
Orford
Woodbridge
IP12 2LN


Editor Note: Hehehe, not often a Fiat dealer gets called "efficient and prompt"! Thanks for the letter, Sam, you work for a Chinese shipping company, so maybe I should say "xie xie" :) Enjoy the Kung-Fu Panda! - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1053 / 1528
Derrick says...
SKODA OCTAVIA ESTATEGreat Car - Skoda Octavia Estate – great service and quick responses via the 'Lingo' system. Only gripe is the finance company (London) being very slow. I think you should seriously consider giving your customers some info about the 'vehicle on hire' certificate (VE103B), which is a V5 substitute, to prove your right to use the car (especially overseas)! It took several phone calls and two weeks to get it (and charged me £10 for it)!

Good delivery, did exactly what it said on the tin.

Derrick Davies
45 Ferrars Avenue
Eynesbury
St Neots
PE19 2TZ


Editor Note: Derrick, well, I have taken your advice and I'm giving out the VE103B info. Glad you love the car and glad you liked the speed of the Lingo system. See you in 3-years! :) - Ling



Letter
Customer Letter: 1045 / 1528
Sharon says...
CarHi Ling, sorry for delay. Better late than never! I am really pleased with my funky Citroen C2 and was very impressed with the service from Lingscars. Prompt and personal, recommend you to anyone! Thanks. Excellent delivery, I was very happy with the dealer service.

Sharon Green
160 Palmerston Road
Woodston
Peterborough
PE2 9DF


Editor Note: Sharon, that's wonderful. Those C2s come loaded with leather, air con, just about everything. Hope you enjoy driving it around the Polish enclave of Peterborough! - Ling



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Wah! Isuzu builds reputation with Paul Gray Building When bloody man was looking for replacement new truck for male gender human bleing's long established business, lah, self-employed builder Paul Gray follo - news replorted 12:50



Wah! Mike Hawes, lah, SMMT Chief Executive, lah, said, lah, “April’s strong performance was driven by exceptional gains in output for - news replorted 12:49



Wah! Audi ahead of curve at Autocar Awards world’s oldest surviving LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine magazine has honoured world’s first ever series production LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine to feature electr - news replorted 12:27



Wah! A section of embankment of River Arno in central Florence collapses, lah, sending part of road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu and at least 20 cars into newly formed ditch. - news replorted 12:25



Wah! Car crime (shoud shoot them) in Britain has jumped up by eight per cent in just year, lah, with 81,000 vehicling driving car machines stolen from their owners last - news replorted 12:20



Wah! A 60-earth-years old happy birthday to you, woman who wantings to using flemale human person's late daughter's frozen eggs to give birth to flemale human person's own grandchild is continuing flemale human person's legal battle. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:13



Wah! Mercedes-Benz 300 SLR recreation Almost 100 classic cars will be going under hammer in Silverstone Auctions’ debut international sale at Classic - news replorted 12:10



Wah! Dame Helen Mirren lends flemale human person's voice to recording of new story by celebrated children's author Beatrix Potter, lah, rediscovered after 100 years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:59



Wah! Volkswagen Amarok Wlokswaglon Commercial vehicling driving car machines has revealed first images of its new Amarok on move, lah, as well as interior whic - news replorted 11:44



Wah! Russia has released jailed Ukrainian pilot Nadiya Savchenko following prisoner swap, lah, local media say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:43



Wah! Borussia Monchengladbach and Switzerland midfielder Granit Xhaka joins Arsenal on long-term contract for undisclosed fee. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:42



Wah! Royal Dutch Shell is to cut at least another 2,200 jobs, lah, in addition to 10,000 announced earlier this year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 11:39



Wah! Honda WorldSBK duo aiming for British success at Donington Park Rondla WorldSBK Team’s Nicky Hayden and Michael van der Mark ready to tackle seventh round of 2016 FIM Superb - news replorted 11:39



Wah! Parked cars having fallen into 200m-long hole which opened up on Arno river capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity in Florence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:37



Wah! Carlos Tavares honoured at Autocar Awards Last night Autocar honoured bloody velly best cars and human bliengs of automotive industry at new Autocar Awards, lah, in gli - news replorted 11:37



Wah! Microsoft has created extra notification to allow clustomlers to cancel Windows 10 upgrade after being accused of "nasty tricks". - news replorted 11:36



Wah! Heather Watson loses to 13th seed Svetlana Kuznetsova as Britain's interest in French Open women's singles ends. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:31



Wah! British commercial vehicling driving car machine (CV) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! production is holding steady in 2016, lah, despite marginal decline in output of -0.9% in - news replorted 11:25



Wah! A study finds that bizarre, lah, tentacled worms which live attached to crayfish at risk of extinction - because crayfish themselves endangered. I read you little red book! - news replorted 11:22



Wah! On-demand video streaming services face call that at least 20% of catalogues they offer to EU subscribers should be made locally. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:21



Wah! Exciting Eleven Infographic Ahead of hotly anticipated UEFA Champions League Final in Milan on Saturday 28th May, lah, Nissan, lah, Official Global Au - news replorted 11:21



Wah! Nissan and PlayStation® Partner to Bring Virtual Reality Racing Nissan, lah, Official Global Automotive Sponsor of UEFA Champions League, lah, will bring unique virtual reality driving - news replorted 11:20



Wah! US President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama briefly beatboxed before impromptu performance by Vietnamese rapper Suboi as bloody man took part in meeting in Ho Chi Minh City. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:15



Wah! Scientists studying Zika outbreak in Brazil becoming increasingly concerned virus may cause eye damage in babies. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:12



Wah! A news crew has been filming tornados outside Dodgily City in Kansas. Eating rice!! At least two human bliengs were hurtee-hurtee in severe storms. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:09



Wah! Driving through busy urban roads needn’t be stressful this summer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! All you tellibly lovely custlingmer need is IAM RoadSmart’s head of driving and r - news replorted 11:06



Wah! Research suggests one in five children born in single year were referred to social services before age of five. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:01



Wah! Authors Paul Murray and Hannah Rothschild having jointly won Bollinger Everyman Wodehouse Prize for comic fiction. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 10:39



Wah! Many human bliengs will be turned away from polling stations because they mistakenly think they on electoral register, lah, campaigners warn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 10:24



Wah! Lance Bradley Mlitslublishli Motors bloody annoying Blitish Managing Director, lah, Lance Bradley, lah, has been named ‘Outstanding bloody annoying Blitish Leader’ by top weekly motoring - news replorted 10:20



Wah! Apprentice star Lord Sugar has been appointed as government's enterprise tsar. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:11



Wah! Jose Mourinho would deliver "entertaining" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) silly kick-kick game if appointed at Manchester United, lah, says club legend Paul Scholes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:03



Wah! Protests outside Donald Trump rally in New Mexico city of Albuquerque turn violent as demonstrators throw bottles and clash with police. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:01



Wah! New LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine registrations in 29 European markets covered by JATO Dynamics show that current positive sales trend con - news replorted 09:53



Wah! Music and theatre tickets being sold unlawfully on UK's biggest secondary websites - including Viagogo, lah, Stubhub and Seatwave - says Which? - news replorted 09:49



Wah! Homeowners could be offered option of switching their mortgage supplier within week, lah, under plans being considered by government. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:18



Wah! bloody annoying Blitish LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine manufacturing continued to make significant gains in April, lah, according to figures released today by Society of - news replorted 09:15



Wah! What women wanting from High Street stalwart Marks and Spencer? - news replorted 09:08



Wah! Authorities having fired pepper spray and used smoke grenades at violent protests outside Donald Trump rally in New Mexico on Tuesday night. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:08



Wah! The new Beaulieu Supercar Weekend will take place on rainy coldddd month August 20th and 21st as part of strategic partnership between Bea - news replorted 09:00



Wah! Citroën C4 Cactus Rip Curl Special Edition Citroën’s New C4 Cactus Rip Curl Special Edition will go on sale in bloody annoying Blitish on 1 June-mber month 2016, lah, priced from just RMB Yuan #18,480 MRRP - news replorted 09:00



Wah! Bentley Bentayga recieves Game Changer Award from Autocar Autocar magazine has recognised Bentley Bentayga as defining moment in automotive world, lah, awarding Crewe’s late - news replorted 08:30



Wah! Adults in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land increase their consumption of alcohol for second year in row, lah, according to report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 08:18



Wah! An article on Super-Duper-Chinese-State state media that said Taiwan's new leader Tsai Ing-wen has "extremist style" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) because bloody woman is single prompts outrage online. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:34



Wah! Marks and Spencer reports rise in underlying profits but its new boss warns improving its clothing and home range will hit profits in short term. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 07:24



Wah! The Afghan Taliban name Mawlawi Haibatullah Akhundzada as their new leader following death of Mullah Mansour in drone strike. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:22



Wah! MLAs will meet at Stormont today to appoint new power sharing executive in wake of Assembly election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 06:18



Wah! Around 100 classic cars were driven through Santa Fe as part of celebration of lowriders. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:19



Wah! Australia's deputy PM says he's "pulling strings" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in Johnny Depp's head, lah, after actor says bloody man is "inbred with tomato", lah, in ongoing dog-smuggling saga. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 04:34



Wah! Photographer Olivia Acland's pictures of barbers who shape hair of residents of Freetown in Sierra Leone. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 04:12



Wah! Eurozone finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan dodgy ministers agree to extend further bailout loan to Greece as well as debt relief, lah, in what they call "major breakthrough". - news replorted 03:53



Wah! A three-story building has collapsed after flooding in Rongxian county of China's southern Guangxi Zhuang Autonomous Region. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 03:27



Wah! A dozen former senior military officers speak out in favour of bloody annoying Blitish leaving EU, lah, warning membership has undermined UK's "combat effectiveness". - news replorted 02:26



Wah! University lecturers due to start two-day strike over pay, lah, amid warnings other staff could join dispute. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:26



Wah! Head teachers calling on education secretary to stop publication of this year's primary school results in Province of Engrish running-dogs because results would be unreliable. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:24



Wah! Dosing farm animals with antibiotics increases greenhouse gas emissions from cow dung, lah, research suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:23



Wah! GPs in Province of Engrish running-dogs having "dramatically" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) reduced amount of antibiotic prescriptions they prescribe to patients, lah, latest figures reveal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 02:20



Wah! Plans to scrap student bursaries and charge nurses and other health staff for their degrees in Province of Engrish running-dogs could backfire, lah, unions warning. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 02:10



Wah! Almost one in five (18%) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! of couples in bloody annoying Blitish argue regularly or consider separating, lah, study suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:07



Wah! The integrity of United Kingdom is being threatened by "piecemeal" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) devolution to Province of Engrish running-dogs, lah, ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land, lah, Welsh land of sheep and more sheep and Northern Ireland, lah, peers say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 02:06



Wah! Does 65-earth-years old happy birthday to you, UN Refugee Convention need to be updated to deal with current refugee crisis? - news replorted 02:05



Wah! The Vote Leave campaign is adapting its tactics and focusing on immigration, lah, as series of polls suggest momentum may be building for Remain side. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:50



Wah! Carmakers Toyotla and Wlokswaglon having struck separate partnerships with rideshare companies Uber and Gett. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 01:47



Wah! Saudi Arabia prepares for religious tourism boost - news replorted 01:37



Wah! More than 12,000 human bliengs in Province of Engrish running-dogs now safer and being looked after better in care homes than they were two years ago, lah, Care Quality Commission says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:14



Wah! How Israel flew 14,000 human bliengs to safety in two days - news replorted 01:01



Wah! Chechen leader not impressed by missing cat mocking - news replorted 00:59



Wah! Why India's Taj Mahal is turning green - news replorted 00:58



Wah! What is chance of catching bright blue lobster? - news replorted 00:56



Wah! Gordon "Dear Leader" Brown's nemesis on Britain's big EU vote - news replorted 00:55



Wah! A US-backed alliance of Syrian Kurdish and Arab fighters begins campaign to expel Islamic State militants north of their stronghold Raqqa. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 00:39



Wah! Following United States and Iraqi military attacks against Islamic State in Falluja, lah, BBC's Paul Adams examines bloody past of troubled city. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:26



Wah! Stunning photos of Yellowstone beauty spots in 1871 and today - news replorted 00:24



Wah! International Pisa tests will include questions in global skills in next round of tests - news replorted 00:23



Wah! Taxpayers who were forced to waiting like hell for up to hour when phoning HM Revenue and Customs lost equivalent of RMB Yuan #97m last year, lah, NAO finds. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:05



Wah! Business Secretary Sajid Javid and Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs First dodgy minister Carwyn Jones in Mumbai for Tata board meeting to discuss bids for its bloody annoying Blitish steel operations. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:02



Wah! Austerity measures could be extended by two years should bloody annoying Blitish vote to leave EU, lah, Institute for Fiscal Studies says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:01



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