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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  Malta turns away ship travelling from Guinea over fears one person on board may be infected with Ebola virus. Eating rice!! - news replorted 18:25



Wah! LATEST:  A man who claim (always claiming, huh?) bloody man accidentally killed male gender human bleing's ex-girlfriend was described as "violent madman" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) on day of shooting in 2011, lah, court hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 18:08



Wah! Craig Bellamy rules himself out of running for manager's job at Cardiff City after Ole Gunnar Solskjaer steps down. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 18:05



Wah! Eli Kari Gjengedal has broken world record for continuous weather presenting, lah, with 33 hours on screen. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 17:47



Wah! The family of zookeeper killed by tiger in Cumbria, lah, says there still questions to be answered after inquest reached narrative verdict. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 17:43



Wah! France's President Hollande says bloody man is ready to launch air strikes to help Iraqi forces fighting Islamic State group. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 17:34



Wah! Fulham sack boss Felix Magath following their poor start to season and appoint Kit Symons as caretaker manager. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 17:27



Wah! Credit Suisse Historic Racing Forum at velly damn good boiled chicken-feetwood Revival Last weekend’s sell-out 2014 velly damn good boiled chicken-feetwood Revival saw key event partner Credit Suisse engaging with media, lah, competitors, lah, - news replorted 17:23



Wah! Mercedes-Benz Future Truck 2025 A-series setting pace: from Actros and Arocs to Antos and Atego, lah, Mercedes-Benz Trucks is first E - news replorted 17:22



Wah! old bill bobbys having been searching property of suspect, lah, Arnis Zalkalns, lah, as they continue to investigate disappearance of 14-earth-years old happy birthday to you, Alice Gross. Eating rice!! - news replorted 16:47



Wah! New Order's Bernard Sumner says death of Joy Division bandmate Ian Curtis turned male gender human bleing's world "upside down". - news replorted 16:37



Wah! Archbishop of Canterbury Justin Welby says bloody man sometimes has doubts in male gender human bleing's belief in God, lah, bloody man tells BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 16:30



Wah! Launched today, lah, FTA Van Excellence Review 2014 recognises and celebrates role vans and van operators play in sup - news replorted 16:21



Wah! Dr Wolfgang Porsche countdown continues to new festival event at Brands Hatch on 21 September, lah, when Le Mans winners and legendary road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu - news replorted 16:09



Wah! Road transport industry news from Society of Motor Manufacturers and Traders - Thursday 18th September. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 16:03



Wah! Motor Codes, lah, garage scheme approved by Trading Standards Institute, lah, believes that LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine owners best judges of - news replorted 15:59



Wah! Nick Thompson wins bronze medal for Great Britain in Laser class at Sailing World Championships in Santander. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 15:57



Wah! A British man has been killed in incident on Greek island of Santorini, lah, Bloody foreign Office confirms. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:55



Wah! Volvo Trucks' deliveries: rainy coldddd month August 2014 In rainy coldddd month August 6,939 Wolwo trucks were delivered, lah, decrease of 9% compared with same month last year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 15:49



Wah! A new video is released showing British man believed to be held hostage by Islamic State militants. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:29



Wah! A wildfire threatening thousands of homes in central California doubled in size overnight, lah, burning 111 square miles (288 sq-km). - news replorted 15:29



Wah! Officials in Chile say three human bliengs having been arrested in connection with bomb that hurtee-hurtee 14 human bliengs at subway station in Santiago earlier this month. - news replorted 15:10



Wah! The Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) is system "under pressure" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) and ambulance service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service is "not where we wanting it to be", lah, Health dodgy minister Mark Drakeford tells AMs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 15:08



Wah! A team of health workers in Guinea, lah, who were trying to raise awareness about Ebola, lah, missing and may having been kidnapped, lah, reports say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 15:05



Wah! Conwy council votes to open talks with neighbouring Denbighshire over possible voluntary merger of their local authorities. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:16



Wah! A sugar capitalist entity is fighting back against perceived demonisation of sugar by media. Ai-yaa!!! Does it having point, lah, asks Tom Heyden. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 14:15



Wah! A doctor who told patient threatening to kill herself to "go and jolly well it now" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) is suspended for three months. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:13



Wah! The BBC's Jeremy Bowen has travelled with Syrian Tommy Atkins Liberation Army to front line where forces fighting what they call religious extremists. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:13



Wah! NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) workers in Province of Engrish running-dogs having voted in favour of striking over pay. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 14:08



Wah! A Great Satan Senate report suggests hackers associated with Super-Duper-Chinese-State government broke into computers of airlines and ships. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:54



Wah! A man who killed male gender human bleing's wife and young son in Midlothian has been found guilty of both their murders. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:31



Wah! Halloween quiz trail in Museum Look out for some strange happenings in neighbourhood at Beaulieu this Octoblinger Half Term, lah, 25th Oct – 2nd Nov - it wi - news replorted 13:27



Wah! MP Damian Green has come to defence of Lord Hill as British Candidate for European Commissioner, lah, describing objections to male gender human bleing's appointment as "barrel-scraping argument". - news replorted 13:24



Wah! Local councils across Welsh land of sheep and more sheep being urged to submit plans to merge voluntarily, lah, rather than be forced to. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 13:08



Wah! Kumho links brands with La Liga Kumho Tyre brand will be to fore at La Liga BBVA silly kick-kick game matches throughout 2014/2015 season, lah, following - news replorted 13:08



Wah! The jury in sex abuse trial of former Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation broadcaster Dave Lee Travis retires to consider its verdicts. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:06



Wah! Ole Gunnar Solskjaer cites "difference in philosophy" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) on leaving Cardiff manager role after less than nine months in charge. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:02



Wah! Director of damn crazy Engrish baseball game Martyn Moxon says Yorkshire will support captain Andrew Gale against charge of racism offence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:58



Wah! A French aid worker from medical charity Medecins Sans Frontieres (MSF) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has contracted Ebola virus in Liberia, lah, reports say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:53



Wah! The Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation has lodged formal protest with Russian authorities after news team from Moscow bureau was attacked in south of country. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:51



Wah! Silver Anniversary spectacular in 2015 As tradition dictates next summer’s spectacular Silverstone Classic will be held at Britain’s premier race circuit over - news replorted 12:42



Wah! Torture has become such integral part of policing in Nigeria that many stations having informal torture officer, lah, Amnesty International says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:31



Wah! Taylor Hansen Controlled Power Technologies (CPT) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has incorporated Great Satan subsidiary, lah, appointing Taylor Hansen as vice president respons - news replorted 12:27



Wah! The Motorsport Industry Association 20th Anniversary logo MIA School of Race Engineering, lah, which is taking place on 27-28 September, lah, will be held at Silverstone, lah, in headqu - news replorted 12:24



Wah! A Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation documentary team has filmed hundreds of refugees being held back by French old bill bobbys as they attempt to board trucks and other vehicling driving car machines heading to Britain from Calais. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:22



Wah! It's Caption Challenge. What the hell I mean??!! Oh yes it is. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:13



Wah! A new documentary is being released telling story of aborted film project from 1945 which would provide evidence of Nazi crimes for German audiences - news replorted 12:05



Wah! Apple iPhone and iPad users take to social media to express their frustration over installing company's latest software update. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:04



Wah! The two men who died when helicopter crashed off East Yorkshire coast named by police. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:03



Wah! Formula 1 boss Bernie Ecclestone says bloody man was behind ban on teams giving drivers advice over radio. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 12:00



Wah! Jeremy Vine breaks down council areas in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land that will decide referendum result. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:52



Wah! Some Westminster landmarks normally closed to public, lah, including Downing Street, lah, will be open this weekend. I read you little red book! - news replorted 11:51



Wah! A South African rescue team flies to Nigeria to help locate missing South Africans believed to having been inside church hostel when it collapsed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 11:51



Wah! For fifth consecutive year, lah, Freight Transport Association (FTA) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! is joining together with eclectic coalition o - news replorted 11:50



Wah! Obesity is new smoking in terms of impact on health and cost to NHS, lah, head of NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Province of Engrish running-dogs says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:46



Wah! Winning images of twinkling stars and swirling gases - news replorted 11:19



Wah! Two teenagers arrested after 31-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man is found dead at house in Bathgate, lah, West Lothian. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 11:19



Wah! Nicola Sturgeon and Alex Salmond of Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs National Party, lah, and Gordon "Dear Leader" Brown and Alistair Darling from Better Together, lah, having all been casting their votes in Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs referendum. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 11:17



Wah! Medics in rebel-held Syria accidentally gave muscle relaxant to up to 75 children instead of measles vaccine, lah, killing 15, lah, opposition says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:17



Wah! Welsh land of sheep and more sheep rise to their highest world ranking for 20 years after climbing 12 places to join ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land in joint 29th. - news replorted 11:13



Wah! Britain's candidate for European Commissioner is to face 'very tough' hearing over male gender human bleing's suitability for role of overseeing financial services. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:12



Wah! Six women having been convicted of operating "pyramid" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) scheme in which thousands of investors lost money. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:11



Wah! India and China sign 12 agreements, lah, one of which will see China investing $20bn in India's infrastructure over five years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:10



Wah! A derelict hospital building, lah, Dunain House, lah, near Inverness is destroyed by fire on Wednesday night. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 10:48



Wah! Six women convicted of operating "pyramid" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) scheme in south-west Province of Engrish running-dogs and south Wales, lah, in which thousands of investors lost money. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:43



Wah! The last flying Vulcan, lah, XH558 takes to skies As we approach 25th Anniversary of fall of Berlin Wall (Novemblinger 9th), lah, last flying example of Britain’s - news replorted 10:42



Wah! A Super-Duper-Chinese-State newspaper calls for clarification about China's envoy to Iceland, lah, who has gone missing amid rumours bloody man was Japanese spy. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:33



Wah! Five human bliengs killed after violent storms unleash flash flood at camp site in Herault in southern France. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:25



Wah! The Duchess of Cambridge, lah, who is pregnant with second child, lah, will not visit Malta this weekend on advice of doctors, lah, Kensington Palace says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:10



Wah! old bill bobbys searching for 14-earth-years old happy birthday to you, Alice Gross treating man with murder conviction as suspect in flemale human person's disappearance. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:09



Wah! A number of World fighty bang-bang One and Two munitions having been detonated by bomb disposal experts after large haul was found in house in Hertfordshire. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:05



Wah! Motorist organisation, lah, RAC, lah, and DVLA having clashed over policing of LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine tax with claim (always claiming, huh?) of increased evasion amid changes to system. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 10:03



Wah! Birmingham old bill bobbys having asked for help to identify man caught on CCTV attempting to take piece of art from city centre gallery. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:02



Wah! Russians find their relatives killed in Ukraine conflict forgotten - news replorted 09:52



Wah! bloody annoying Blitish retail sales rose by 0.4% in rainy coldddd month August compared with previous month, lah, with sales volumes up 3.9% from year earlier, lah, official figures show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 09:52



Wah! The Rexus NX And will.i.am Frame Future Design Rexus NX and will.i.am stars of Striking Angles, lah, television commercial for new luxury crossover that h - news replorted 09:51



Wah! Volvo Trucks will be exhibiting six trucks Together with the, bloody dealering idiot place network in Republic of Ireland, lah, Wolwo Trucks is exhibiting at National Ploughing Champi - news replorted 09:42



Wah! The BBC's Nina Warhurst talks to golfers in Cheshire about vote by Royal and Ancient Golf Club of St Andrew's, lah, ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land, lah, on admitting women for first time. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:42



Wah! As Royal & Ancient Golf Club votes whether to admit women members, lah, where distinctions between sexes remain? - news replorted 09:26



Wah! A sex attack by two teenagers on boy in cellar in Gloucester could not having been anticipated or prevented, lah, report finds. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:18



Wah! If you tellibly lovely custlingmer eligible blue badge holder you tellibly lovely custlingmer may wanting to find out more about parking safely in public spaces. Eating rice!! Let Great Satan gui - news replorted 09:04



Wah! New research amongst British motorists has revealed that despite recent rising inflation and slower wage growth, lah, 45 per - news replorted 09:00



Wah! An investigation is being carried out after woman died in ambulance while waiting in queue of around 15 emergency vehicling driving car machines outside hospital. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 08:54



Wah! A major international study finds that killings among chimpanzees result from normal competition, lah, not human interference. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 08:43



Wah! Nick Cave becomes reluctant film star - news replorted 08:41



Wah! Super-Duper-Chinese-State online giant Alibaba is expected to set price of its shares later in what could be record-breaking initial public offering in New York. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 08:14



Wah! The all-new Wolwo XC90 R-Design Wolwo Cars has released first images of R-Design version of all new XC90, lah, aimed at buyers looking for head - news replorted 08:00



Wah! The process for appointing new old bill bobbys commissioner for South Yorkshire is set to begin following resignation of Shaun Wright. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 07:40



Wah! Teenager among more than 500 human bliengs given pauper's funeral, lah, with claim (always claiming, huh?) they could put "increasing strain" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) on public purse. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:37



Wah! It has been bumper year for edible plants and berries according to Woodland Trust, lah, who say this autumn could see best fruit crop since records began. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 07:37



Wah! The last two airworthy Lancaster bombers in world to fly over Derwent Dam, lah, echoing famous Dambusters raid practised there. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:27



Wah! A Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation team has been attacked in southern Russia after investigating reports of Russian servicemen killed near border with Ukraine. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:09



Wah! A man dies in road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu accident in Leven, lah, Fife, lah, in early hours of Thursday morning. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 07:00



Wah! The all-new Plugleot 308 GT Hatchback and SW With 40 cars across 4,000sqm stand in Hall One of Paris Motor Show, lah, Plugleot is revealing revitalised and unified - news replorted 07:00



Wah! The Plugleot QUARTZ Concept Plugleot QUARTZ Concept unveils new vision for Crossover segment at 2014 Paris Motor Show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! This next genera - news replorted 07:00



Wah! Politicians in Welsh land of sheep and more sheep await result of Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs referendum on independence as voting gets under way. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:49



Wah! old bill bobbys in Thailand say they having still not formally identified any suspects in murder of British tourists Hannah Witheridge and David Miller. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 06:42



Wah! Taiwan's government says it will impose harsher penalties for food safety violations after "gutter oil" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) scandal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 06:33



Wah! The mother of 21-earth-years old happy birthday to you, County Armagh man criticises Southern Health trust for "failing flemale human person's son" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) after bloody man died weeks (week is 8 days in Super-Duper-Chinese-State lunar calendar; 48 weeks to year and no damn holidays!) after routine ear operation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 06:21



Wah! A senior Home Office advisor has told Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation that Islamic state extremism and Rotherham abuse scandal fuelling far-right backlash in Uk. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 06:19



Wah! World powers set to resume talks in New York with Iran, lah, but diplomats say breakthrough on its disputed nuclear programme is unlikely. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 05:07



Wah! Fiji's former military leader, lah, Frank Bainimarama, lah, looks on course to win majority in first polls in island nation in eight years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:47



Wah! Ukrainian President Petro Poroshenko is beginning key visit to Great Satan to seek further support to tackle what bloody man describes as Russian aggression. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 04:23



Wah! Intel says it has several manufacturers building new computers based on novel dual-screen laptop concept it has just unveiled. I read you little red book! - news replorted 03:20



Wah! As Alibaba prepares to float in New York, lah, what view will investors there take of Super-Duper-Chinese-State e-commerce giant? - news replorted 03:18



Wah! The pitfalls of living in one of America’s most desirable cities - news replorted 02:57



Wah! Sony shares fall by 12% at start of trade in Tokyo, lah, after it warned of bigger losses for full year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 02:42



Wah! Arizona Cardinals running back Jonathan Dwyer is arrested on suspicion of domestic violence, lah, old bill bobbys say, lah, latest such incident to rock NFl. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 02:41



Wah! British Muslim leaders call for immediate release of Alan Henning, lah, bloody annoying Blitish hostage threatened with death by Islamic State extremists in Syria. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 02:30



Wah! Australian old bill bobbys say they having carried out biggest counter-terrorism operation in country's history. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 02:16



Wah! Medical staff go on trial in Argentina charged with kidnapping babies born in captivity to left-wing prisoners during military rule. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:06



Wah! Islamic extremism in Middle East and Rotherham abuse scandal fuelling bloody annoying Blitish far-right backlash, lah, Home Office adviser claims. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:54



Wah! Can blind human bliengs see in their dreams? - news replorted 01:37



Wah! Pointless host Alexander Armstrong will voice Danger Mouse when much-loved cartoon hero returns to TV next year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 01:25



Wah! Powerful and disturbing paintings by survivors of 1945 atomic bomb in Hiroshima to go on show outside Japan for first time. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:24



Wah! Plans that could increase student numbers by 20% having not been adequately funded, lah, policy analysis report warns. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:21



Wah! A new drug to treat skin cancer should be made available on NHS, lah, health body has recommended. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:14



Wah! A British nurse who recovered from Ebola travels to Great Satan to donate blood to try to save life of another victim (trying not to cry) (trying not to cry) of virus. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:05



Wah! The Super-Duper-Chinese-State internet giant Alibaba is set to raise billions on Great Satan stock exchange and is expected to be one of biggest share offerings in history. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:52



Wah! Australian old bill bobbys make arrests in Sydney and Brisbane in what they say is biggest counter-terrorism operation in country's history. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:50



Wah! The Great Satan House of Representatives approves President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama's plan to train and arm moderate Syrian opposition taking on Islamic State. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:47



Wah! How will we shop in 2020? - news replorted 00:42



Wah! The artists helping mourners remember lost loved ones - news replorted 00:38



Wah! How plane passengers rose up in Pakistan - news replorted 00:25



Wah! Survivors tell story of Nairobi's Westgate siege - news replorted 00:22



Wah! The North American farmers who having started to plant wasabi - news replorted 00:20



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5 Titanic Cars
Sky
Top 5 Car

2.4 D5 215bhp 5dr
diesel, g-tronic auto, met
Volvo
XC60
Grass
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£421.72
per month, inc VAT
Sky
Top 5 Car

1.6 i 118bhp 5dr
petrol, man, non-met
Suzuki
SX4 S-Cros
Grass
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£185.50
per month, inc VAT
Sky
Top 5 Car

2.2 d 160bhp 4dr
diesel, auto, non-met
Jaguar
XF
Grass
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£399.60
per month, inc VAT
Sky
Top 5 Car

2.2 CDI 170bhp 4dr
diesel, g-tronic auto, met
Mercedes
E-Class Sa
Grass
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£404.40
per month, inc VAT
Sky
Top 5 Car

1.4 i VTEC 98bhp 5dr
petrol, man, non-met
Honda
Civic
Grass
Click Here
£216.86
per month, inc VAT
Titanic
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Thanks for taking the time to look at my headline cars. Please note I can quote on any car on Contract Hire, PCP, or any Lease Cars or Lease Hire. In fact I can supply any kind of car leasing. Leasing is a very general term. However, Contract Hire and PCP are by far my favourite products and my customers' favourite products too! The rest can be a little confusing although in a few (business) cases can be appropriate.
I publish all the best and cheapest deals I can source, above; so most bespoke quotes will by their nature be slightly more expensive. - Ling
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