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CAR LEASING
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Note: I live inside this website Monday to Friday 9am-6pm, to give you the very best service and make your experience a happy one! - I am Ling, accept no substitutes
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Version 237.1.
You can trust me! ... In 2015 I rented over £85million of cars (at RRP).
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Richard Farleigh - "I wanted to invest; I was amazed by Ling's
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invest... but ye turrn'ed me dooon!"

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Hi! I am Ling Cheap Car Leasing - WAH! from Dragons' Den. I lease cheap new cars!
UPDATE... The latest car I've added is a Hyundai Ioniq Hatchback 1.6 GDi Hybrid 16v (141bhp) SE Connect (2019) Hatchback 5dr 1580cc Hybrid at £232.92 inc VAT at 15:31 yesterday - Ling
Car Leasing Traffic Light
Candybar
ARE YOU OLD?
Too old to have a car? Claim FREE Werther's Original!

Every old person loves a Werther's.
TRY A CHINESE ONE! FREE!
I give away 10x Werther's/day!
Ling and Free Lunch!
Fill in my form below to apply Werther's!

WERTHER SONG!
Listen while sucking!


This is damn advert for Ling's van leasing and contract hire page
Ling Van Leasing!

Every web visitor...
...who is too old to drive, can apply for a Chinese Werther Original. Old people with false teeth should be DAMN CAREFUL about choking. Free sugar-rush!

FREE!
Chinese Werther Originals! ONLY FOR OLD PEOPLE!

There is some DANGER to elderly people if they choke on Werther's Original and fall off Mobility Scooter and crash, this is unfortunate. Werther can cause BIG CRASH!

Note Werther Original is INDIVIDUALLY WRAPPED and from China. This is due to it being a NOVELTY COLLECTOR ITEM! Do not go complaining to British Trading Standards about Chinese chemical ingredients or I will label you a pig-headed capitalist-roader and you will be subject to my substantial penalties.
Mao recommends Ling's Werthers!
Mr Mao recommends Ling's Werther Originals. "Mmmm, you're lovin' it!"


Werthers do not look like this!
If you own one of THESE ...


Werthers do not look like this!
...OR one of these poverty models


Werthers do not look like this!
...OR a super-fast scooter!
FILL IN FORM!
   
Your Name
Your Age - must be OLD GIT age.
Your Address
City
Postcode
Email
How you find my site?
 

Safety advice: WERTHER'S KILLS *You agree not to sue me if you ill or choke on Werther! Do not feed Werther to English children. Chinese children OK can cope with Werther. You also agree to receive price list and consider having a damn car!

If you kind, please give some nice comments about website or service or offer! I send 10 Werthers per day based on these comments! Thanks.
Pay attention! If you too lazy to original comment, or just write 1 word, then I am too lazy to post these noodles!

Also, maybe you recommend me to friend who may buy car, not just rob me of free gifts? Thanks for this - Ling
Make sure you write
interesting comments.

Maybe you get lucky STRAWBERRY Werther? Do you feel lucky, punk?




No Werther's were hurt in this promotion.


LingsCars
Chinese WERTHER
ORIGINALS LOOK LIKE THIS!


As soon as you fill in the details above (for 10 OLD visitors per day) your Werther Original may be in post!
No need to wait 21 days for delivery!
If the British Post Office government monopoly Peter Mandelson sell-off works OK, you will have Werther next day!
- You have free Werther, now give my details to a younger person who will rent cheap car!
If you are lucky, you get STRAWBERRY Werther!
DANGER!
causes big shit!

You should seek truth from facts.
Three sayings which match my philosophy are;


"It does not matter if a car is black or white
as long as it gets you to the shops"

- Deng Xiao Ping


"People of Britain, you can trust me"
- Tony Blair

"I am Chinese not Catholic:
I cannot do miracles"

- Ling


Long Live Ling
- Ling
lingscars.com
CLICK! See 206 clients live in LINGO!
Live!!
CLICK to VIEW!
Online Service
Response Times
Quote > Proposal > Order > Delivery
 
77 CLIENTS IN 'PROPOSAL'
...LING REPLIES IN:
  HRS : MINUTES sec  
 
129 CLIENTS IN 'ORDER'
...LING REPLIES IN:
  HRS : MINUTES sec  
Lingscars.com Limited (GB)
Customers use my secure LINGO management system.
Response times above based on last 4 hour period between
9am - 6pm, Mon to Fri
-Ling
WOW! UK's best service times!
No Waiting
lingscars.com
Hello, hello! This is me!
Don't run, little customers! I'm friendly...
I am the Viz UK business ambassador!
Post me Ferrero-Rochers! Yum Yum!
Unlike most other internet car leasing sites, I publish all my contact information openly!
...so, you know who I am
- Ling


THE UK's FAVOURITE
CAR LEASING WEBSITE!

The UK's FAVOURITE car leasing website
The UK's FAVOURITE car leasing website
Boss: Ling Valentine MSc IoD
LING World Headquarters
Vance Business Park
Gateshead, NE11 9NE
Tel 0191 460 9444
Fax 0870 486 1130
sales@LINGsCARS.com
I prefer email to phone - Ling
VAT No: 866 0241 30
Co Reg No: 6178634
Consumer Credit Licence: 663330
Data Protection No: Z1098490
Best Before: 17/08/2007
LING World HQ
People's Republic of Gateshead!

 
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...don't do lease cars, but if they did, they would be done like this - Ling
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