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CAR LEASING
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Van leasing is the leasing of the use of a motor vehicle for a fixed or indefinite period of time. It is commonly offered by dealers as an alternative to van purchase. The key difference in a lease is that after the lease expires, the lessee must return the van to the dealer or buy it. Rationale: Van Leasing offers advantages to both buyers and sellers. For the buyer, lease payments will usually be lower than payments on a van loan would be and qualification is usually easier. Some consumers may prefer leasing as it allows them to simply return a van and select a brand new van when the lease expires, allowing a consumer to drive a new vehicle every few years without the responsibility of selling the old vehicles. A lessee does not have to worry about the future value of the van, while a vehicle owner does. For the leasor, leasing generates income from a vehicle the leasor still owns and will be able to sell or lease again once the original lease has expired. As consumers will typically use a leased vehicle for a shorter period of time than one they buy outright, leasing may generate repeat customers more quickly, which may fit into various aspects of a dealer's business model. Lease agreement: Lease agreements typically stipulate an early termination fee and limit the number of miles a lessee can drive a common number is 10,000 to 15,000 miles per year of the lease. If the mileage allowance is exceeded, fees may apply. Dealers will typically allow a lessee to negotiate a higher mileage allowance, for a higher lease payment. Van Lease agreements usually specify how much wear on the vehicle is allowable, and the lessee may face a fee if that amount of wear has been exceeded. The actual van lease payments are calculated very similarly to the way loan payments are, but instead of an APR, the company uses something called the money factor. At the end of a lease term, the leasee must either return the van to the owner or purchase it. The end of lease price is usually agreed upon when the lease is signed.
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Hi! I am Ling Cheap Car Leasing - WAH! from Dragons' Den. I lease cheap new cars!
UPDATE... The latest car I've added is a Volvo XC60 2.0 D4 16v (190bhp) SE Nav Leather 2WD Station Wagon 5dr 1969cc Diesel at £276.52 inc VAT at 16:36 on 26th May - Ling
Car Leasing Traffic Light
Candybar
CLAIM FREE LUNCH!!
Eat like a capitalist-pig peasant rice-farmer!

Everyone says there is no free lunch.
YES THERE IS! FUKU!
I give away 10x free lunch/day!
Ling and Free Lunch!
Fill in my form below to apply FUKU noodles!

NOODLE SONG!!
Listen while eating!


This is damn advert for Ling's van leasing and contract hire page
Ling Van Leasing!

Every web visitor...
...can apply for delicious out-of-date collectors item FUKU brand noodles. Free lunch now includes out of date Chinese Nescafe sachet (some with extra hydrogenated fat) and sugar-based CHEMICAL pudding. Free chopsticks!

FREE!
Genuine rainforest bamboo chopsticks!

There is some DANGER to small children if they choke on dried plum stone or poke eye with chopsticks, this is unfortunate. Dried plum can also cause BIG SHIT!

Note FUKU noodle may be OUT OF DATE. This is due to it being a NOVELTY COLLECTOR ITEM! Do not go complaining to Trading Standards or I will label you a pig-headed capitalist-roader and
you will be subject to my substantial penalties.

Mao recommends Ling's FUKU noodles!
Mr Mao recommends Ling's FUKU noodles. "Mmmmmmm, you're lovin' it!"


Noodles do not look like this!
Noodles do NOT look like this!


Noodles do not look like this!
...OR like this!


Noodles do not look like this!
...OR like this!

Grabbing Bastards from Magic Freebies


Due to the fact that thousands of grabbing bastards from Magic Freebies are requesting Free Lunch from me, I am getting pretty hacked off by these takers who give nothing back to society and just want to scam loads of free stuff. They are not exactly in need like Japanese Tsunami victims, Magic Freebies grabbers are mainly benefit cheats and gift-suckers.


I offer free lunch of out-of-date dead chicken FUKU noodles for normal visitors, not for professional freebie scrapers who seem live on nothing but what they can grab for free, from others.


Free Noodles are withdrawn from the grabbing bastards, and are only available to normal visitors who arrive through natural visits. I am pleased to support normal ethical visitors. - LING


FILL IN FORM!
   
Your Name
Your Address
City
Postcode
email
How you find my site?
 

Safety advice: NOODLE KILLS *You agree not to sue me if you ill or choke on noodle! Do not feed noodle to English children. Chinese children OK can cope with noodle. You also agree to receive price list and consider having a damn car!

If you kind, please give some nice comments about website or service or offer! I send 10 noodles per day based on these comments! Thanks.
Pay attention! If you too lazy to original comment, or just write 1 word, then I am too lazy to post these noodles!
Also, maybe you recommend me to friend who may buy car, not just rob me of free gifts? Thanks for this - Ling
Make sure you write
interesting comments.

Maybe you get noodles AND pudding!




No noodles were hurt in this promotion.


LingsCars
FUKU
NOODLES LOOK MORE LIKE THIS!


As soon as you fill in the details above (for 10 visitors per day) your noodles and pudding may be in post!
No need to wait 21 days for delivery!
If the British Post Office government monopoly Peter Mandelson sell-off works OK, you will have free lunch next day! - You have free lunch, now rent cheap car!

If you are lucky, you get dried plum pud!
DANGER!
causes big shit!

You should seek truth from facts.
Three sayings which match my philosophy are;


"It does not matter if a car is black or white
as long as it gets you to the shops"

- Deng Xiao Ping


"People of Britain, you can trust me"
- Tony Blair

"I am Chinese not Catholic:
I cannot do miracles"

- Ling


Long Live Ling
- Ling
lingscars.com
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Online Service
Response Times
Quote > Proposal > Order > Delivery
 
79 CLIENTS IN 'PROPOSAL'
...LING REPLIES IN:
  HRS : MINUTES sec  
 
146 CLIENTS IN 'ORDER'
...LING REPLIES IN:
  HRS : MINUTES sec  
Lingscars.com Limited (GB)
Customers use my secure LINGO management system.
Response times above based on last 4 hour period between
9am - 6pm, Mon to Fri
-Ling
WOW! UK's best service times!
No Waiting
lingscars.com
Hello, hello! This is me!
Don't run, little customers! I'm friendly...
I am the Viz UK business ambassador!
Post me Ferrero-Rochers! Yum Yum!
Unlike most other internet car leasing sites, I publish all my contact information openly!
...so, you know who I am
- Ling


THE UK's FAVOURITE
CAR LEASING WEBSITE!

The UK's FAVOURITE car leasing website
The UK's FAVOURITE car leasing website
Boss: Ling Valentine MSc IoD
LING World Headquarters
Vance Business Park
Gateshead, NE11 9NE
Tel 0191 460 9444
Fax 0870 486 1130
sales@LINGsCARS.com
I prefer email to phone - Ling
VAT No: 866 0241 30
Co Reg No: 6178634
Consumer Credit Licence: 663330
Data Protection No: Z1098490
Best Before: 17/08/2007
LING World HQ
People's Republic of Gateshead!

 
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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  Top prize at Cannes Film Festival goes to Ruben Ostlund's Square - news replorted 19:12



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Wah! The WSL 1 Spring Series title race swings into Chelsea's hands as they thrash Liverpool 7-0, lah, while rivals Man City lose. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 14:26



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Wah! France's president says male gender human bleing's white-knuckle encounter with Great Satan leader was designed to getting respect. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 13:45



Wah! A minute's silence for victims and casualties of Monday's terror attack was held. I read you little red book! - news replorted 13:43



Wah! Kell Brook's trainer says British fighter broke male gender human bleing's left eye socket during Saturday's defeat by Errol Spence Jr. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:35



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Wah! Failure saw most services cancelled from Heathrow and Gatwick, lah, with disruption set to continue through capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity Holiday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 13:06



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Wah! A Surrey couple postpone their Santorini ceremony as guests, lah, including three bridesmaids, lah, stuck at Heathrow. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 12:47



Wah! Labour, lah, Liberal Democrats and SNP having called for employment tribunal fees to be scrapped. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:26



Wah! An emoji translator and wedding hashtag creator. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Minute speaks to five human bliengs with jobs you tellibly lovely custlingmer probably never knew existed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:02



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Wah! Diane Abbott says quote about flemale human person's and IRA is 34 years old and "we having all moved on" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) since then. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:55



Wah! Civilians hardest hit in final phase of Iraq's military assault on IS militants, lah, says Un. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:52



Wah! Two amateur runners who provided defining image of this year's London (capital of Great England) Marathon meet for first clock time result to take part in Great Manchester Run. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:21



Wah! Nell Jones' family says bloody woman was their "world" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) and "always put everyone else before herself". - news replorted 08:10



Wah! This is summer of great significance for Arsenal - and we will soon see most significant moment of all, lah, writes Phil McNulty. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 06:49



Wah! The Great Satan president said bloody man would announce this week if bloody man would pull out of Paris agreement. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 04:47



Wah! The velly damn good boiled chicken-feet and bad to come out of Cannes this year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 03:52



Wah! The Courteeners play emotional gig for 50,000 people, lah, five days after bomb attack. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 03:07



Wah! Schapelle Corby was jailed for marijuana smuggling in case which caused outrage in Australia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 01:11



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Wah! The images once hung on walls of Province of Engrish running-dogs's last tobacco factory in Nottingham. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 00:44



Wah! A massive IT systems failure led to all flights from Heathrow and Gatwick being cancelled on Saturday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:32



Wah! It started as free festival but Castlemorton Common became UK's biggest ever illegal rave. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:30



Wah! American Errol Spence Jr produces stunning display to defeat Kell Brook and take IBF world welterweight title from Briton. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:28



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Wah! Faith was drugged and taken to forest by al-Shabab militants fighting in Somalia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 00:11



Wah! With half million tenants now having to borrow to pay rent, lah, what parties promising? - news replorted 00:07



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Wah! For 20 years, lah, Christian group has held prayers on train carriage during their one hour commute. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:04



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