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Hi! I am Ling Cheap Car Leasing - WAH! from Dragons' Den. I lease cheap new cars!
I expose ILLEGAL and MISLEADING contract hire and leasing websites! Why are you being tricked? - Ling
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I reveal CHEATING LOW LEASING PRICES from other car leasing companies! Why they do THIS? - Ling
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Manager says:
"Ling is such a superb 2009 Award Winner for the best use of IT and Communications. Innovative use of the internet and her first class customer service should bring her many more years of business success."
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UPDATE... The latest car I've added is a Jaguar XF 3.0 i V6 (234bhp) Luxury Saloon 4dr 2968cc Petrol at £464.11 inc VAT at 10:32 yesterday - Ling

Car Leasing Cheap Car Lease Contract Hire




WEBSITE ADVICE
from Ling


Stop regarding website as a "thing". Regard it as real life, alive, like an animal or pet. You need to feed website EVERY day! Maybe like pet spider.

On other hand, spider can be baked like potato in China, delicious! hehe, with added bonus of 8 "drumsticks" per spider. Better value than frog or chicken - Ling


I am so pleased that most people like website. Recently, I have many questions asked about how to make own site that works like my site. Here are Ling thoughts...


Most people and business look at website wrong way. Try plugging head into 240v mains electric to clear brain.

Website is like an extension of you, person behind business. Are you alive? Then website should be alive. Do you change, have emotion, get angry, get happy? Then website should do all these things. Here is how (in Ling humble opinion):


Learn how to do basic editing on website. Use program like Macromedia Dreamweaver and sit with clever druggy student who show you some basic skill. It is actually quite easy. Learn to do things in source code. This is trick. Then you UNDERSTAND. Suddenly you say WAH! Then easy. You are capable adult, you can learn this stuff if you have interest. You can view source code of pages, and copy and paste something to duplicate an idea from someone else's site. Or to do same thing again on your own site. Every time I do something like this window, I just copy paste and then change text and pictures. Not do it from scratch. So easy!



Whatever question, any question, answer is always "DATABASE". If you are showing any "things" on website ALWAYS use database. SQL (MySQL) is best and free, Access is Microsoft shit but works OK I suppose. Always begin by creating database. This is so, so important. Talk to student, pay money to get this right! If you do this well, you may be able to run WHOLE BUSINESS from website database, making website pivot of business. This is how it should be, as website is more real than a real shop.

Get a nice FTP client like WS-FTP and be familiar with it. FTP like mad, up, down, up, down into your server space. Learn this. Do things live on web. Send up, refresh page, look, change, send up again, refresh, look, change and so on. Nobody just gets it right. Ask drug student to help when you hit errors, you soon understand. (Always save old page under different name - I use > symbol after page name so I can restore it if I go wrong).

And that's it! Now just extend your life into your webpage. You get an idea, put it up! You get a letter, just post it up! You want a picture, google image search, fanny to size, then post! So quick, so easy, so alive. Avoid mistake of writing like you are doing PR booklet. Talk normally, express emotions. DO NOT get someone else to write your stuff!!! Visitors are normal people, they like "feeling". Best TV programs have emotion and feeling. Website same!... Do you read and understand this, or are you stupid dumb dumb who goes down boring "professional" route? All you do there is throw money. I am talking about throwing your feelings. Gettit?

Most business make mistake of paying a company to build page, without learning. Learn! Modify, change. Don't pay the idiots to do this, do it yourself. Treat webpage like business office or shop. If you want to move a desk in office you move it. Put calendar on wall, you put. Do the same on website. Do every day. So simple. All your customers can see this. They get "feeling" from it.

Just make sure pages load right. Test each page all the time. Be your website's best visitor. Keep an eye on stats. Make sure up, up, up.

Make sure website can do everything normal person can do if they visit your shop in real life. Avoid long forms, think like customer. So easy all this. Now promote website by every means, fax shot, letter, find an advertising site bring you traffic.

Last, don't let 1 day go by without changing or feeding or petting website, even tiny thing. If you don't feed website it will die. Like pet. This is all emotion, not fact. You think I'm wrong? Look at your website, look at my website. When last time you even visit, never mind change? In real life you tell jokes, eat, drink, shout etc; do all this on website! Wah, this is so simple but most people consume in "professionalism". Visitor just want website to work well for them.

That's it. Sorry if this is too long. Sorry if you expect more. Hope this helps you, please let me know! - Ling

CLICK! See 466 clients live in LINGO!
CLICK to VIEW!
Online Service
Response Times
Quote > Proposal > Order > Delivery
 
45 CLIENTS IN 'PROPOSAL'
...LING REPLIES IN:
  HRS : MINUTES sec  
 
421 CLIENTS IN 'ORDER'
...LING REPLIES IN:
  HRS : MINUTES sec  
Customers use my secure LINGO management system.
Response times above based on last 4 hour period between
9am - 6pm, Mon to Fri
-Ling

No Waiting
 
MINI BLOG
 
CHEAPER THAN PENDRAGON
Posted: 02/08/10
Comments ( 0 )
CHEAPER THAN PENDRAGON I've just delivered a new car to a senior manager (for his personal use) in PENDRAGON PLC, the UK's largest dealer group. The grou... READ MORE
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NO FM CAR RADIO IN 2015
Posted: 04/03/10
Comments ( 3 )
NO FM CAR RADIO IN 2015 Listening to the radio in our cars is something we all take for granted. Every car these days comes with a good quality radio, and... READ MORE
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MY SISTER'S (CHINESE) SKODA!
Posted: 08/07/10
Comments ( 4 )
MY SISTER'S (CHINESE) SKODA! Although I only lease cars in the UK, my sister Shan asked me to help her buy a brand-new car in China!
She looked at quite a... READ MORE
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HIDING VAT
Posted: 02/07/10
Comments ( 0 )
HIDING VAT Can you believe prices you see on the web? I've gotta say, how annoyed it makes me that so many websites break the law, also known... READ MORE
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I am GAY ICON! WoW!
Posted: 04/02/10
Comments ( 1 )
I am GAY ICON! WoW! How amazing! I have my first Civil Partnership couple, both applying a car EACH! That was two weeks ago; the sensible one has alre... READ MORE
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THE 3 DEGREES - MY IT CROWD
Posted: 18/07/10
Comments ( 0 )
THE 3 DEGREES - MY IT CROWD Just to say that Mark, Jamie and Jonny have graduated. Fantastic!
All have got FIRSTS in Computer something or other from Sun... READ MORE
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Hello, hello! This is me!
Don't run, little customers! I'm friendly...
I am the Viz UK business ambassador!
Post me Ferrero-Rochers! Yum Yum!
Unlike most other internet car leasing sites, I publish all my contact information openly!
...so, you know who I am
- Ling


THE UK's FAVOURITE
CAR LEASING WEBSITE!

The UK's FAVOURITE car leasing website
The UK's FAVOURITE car leasing website
Boss: Ling Valentine MSc IoD
LING World Headquarters
Vance Business Park
Gateshead, NE11 9NE
Tel 0191 460 9444
Fax 0870 486 1130
sales@LINGsCARS.com
I prefer email to phone - Ling
VAT No: 866 0241 30
Co Reg No: 6178634
Consumer Credit Licence: 624022
Data Protection No: Z1098490
Best Before: 17/08/2007
LING World HQ
People's Republic of Gateshead!

 

Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

LATEST: Inside Royal Navy's newest, lah, most powerful attack submarine - news replorted 03:45



LATEST: The government of Mozambique says price rises which having led to deadly riots "irreversible", lah, as Maputo residents urged to continue their protests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:10



The Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation denies director general compromised its independence by visiting Downing Street to discuss coverage of govenrment's spending cuts. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:01



Preparations for Commonwealth Games badly behind schedule - news replorted 02:51



Roger Federer overcomes windy conditions to beat Andreas Beck and reach Great Satan Open third round, lah, but seeds Nikolay Davydenko and Maran Cilic crash out. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 02:49



The Mexican Tommy Atkins Liberation Army says it has killed 25 suspected drug cartel gunmen in clash near Great Satan border after its soldiers came under fire. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:26



Why tensions rising in South China Sea - news replorted 02:14



A health watchdog reports marked improvement in 999 response times at Yorkshire Ambulance Service. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:53



Ultrafine measurements of atmospheric gases could help scientists track down last sources of CFCs thought to be slowing recovery of ozone hole. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:49



The government's chief environment scientist calls for more openness in admitting UK's cuts in greenhouse gas emissions illusion. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 01:49



The River Amazon has dropped to its lowest level in 40 years in north-eastern Peru, lah, leaving boats stranded. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:49



bloody annoying Blitish Independence Party members gather for their autumn conference in Torquay with search for new leader top of its agenda. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 01:40



Judges to deliver verdict more than five years after trial began - news replorted 01:19



A lottery system for school places in Brighton failed to give poorer children equal access to top schools, lah, academics say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:49



Why bed-bugs on monthly number-three again - news replorted 00:42



Alcohol consumption has fallen faster than ever, lah, figures from British Beer and Pub Association suggest. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:38



Engineering manufacturing in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land is showing its best performance since 2006, lah, according to latest figures. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:30



Unison ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land members will discuss how to respond to move by councils to impose pay deal on 150,000 workers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:28



Gardeners being warned about risk of Legionnaire's disease from compost after pensioner developed disease after handling compost. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:03



Long-term using of bone-strengthening drugs may boost risk of oesophageal cancer, lah, study suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:03




Ncap
Crash tests!
I take the trouble to show every crash test for my new cars, in the interests of customer health and safety!
Click HERE - Ling

My Top 10 Car Adverts!
FIAT Panda baby!

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PLAY BOTTOM TRUMPS!


JUST FOR FUN!
I research and publish a full Chinese Car Guide. Full facts and figures! Interesting reading. Hope you enjoy! - Ling

Now I search 75,000 mobile deals to find you the cheapest! Click to buy. Top 50 mobile handsets - HERE.
- Ling

My Top 10 Car Adverts!
FIAT Panda baby!

Funny car leasing TV ads!


Not sponsored by


...don't do lease cars, but if they did, they would be done like this - Ling


Lunch!
UK Contract Hire NEW FEATURE "There is no free lunch" - YES THERE IS! I bring you free lunch. Nowhere else give you this offer! Click here - Ling

My Top 10 Car Adverts!
Bouncy Jeep advert!

Funny car leasing TV ads!

UK Car Sales Statistics
I expose HIDDEN UK Car Sales Fig's
make-by-make!

See the sales stats the
car industry hides!

Not sponsored by


...don't do lease cars, but if they did, they would be done like this - Ling

My Top 10 Car Adverts!
Mazda Pick-Up!

Funny car leasing TV ads!

Extra Cheap Cars
EXTRA CHEAP
CARS
HERE
See 30 cheapest cars!

Sidebar Letters
Sidebar Letters Read my customer letters! Choose a CAR TYPE and read letters from customers who have rented this type from me!

My Top 10 Car Adverts!
FIAT Panda baby!

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Lunch!
UK Contract Hire NEW FEATURE "There is no free lunch" - YES THERE IS! I bring you free lunch. Nowhere else give you this offer! Click here - Ling

Now I search 75,000 mobile deals to find you the cheapest! Click to buy. Top 50 mobile handsets - HERE.
- Ling

My Top 10 Car Adverts!
Audi S4 & a dog!

Funny car leasing TV ads!

My Top 10 Car Adverts!
Pimp my VW Golf!

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LINGsCARS is verified by Norton Security

Now I search 75,000 mobile deals to find you the cheapest! Click to buy. Top 50 mobile handsets - HERE.
- Ling

Nuclear Truck
My Nuclear
Missile Truck

My Top 10 Car Adverts!
Citroen 2CV dance!

Funny car leasing TV ads!

My Top 10 Car Adverts!
Pimp my VW Golf!

Funny car leasing TV ads!

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