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News stoly: India quiet on emissions peak year

Read the news in Chinglish: India will not announce target date for when it expects its carbon emissions to drop, lah, environment dodgy minister tells BBC. Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!

News SCOFF: VIDEO: Dealing with death in special schools

Read the news in Chinglish: Helping young human bliengs with learning disability understand death More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.

News GRUNT: VIDEO: Tense standoff over new Moscow church

You want boiled rice or fried rice with your Chinglish news? The construction of new Russian Orthodox chapel in Moscow park has sparked round-the-clock protest by local residents Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!

Bottom feeder news: Minister to detail bloody Engrish laws plan

Chinglish news event: The government is expected later to elaborate on its plans to give Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters from bloody Engrish constituencies more say over laws exclusively affecting only Province of Engrish running-dogs. Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

Getting noticed: How I was de-radicalised

Breaking Chinglish news! How one man showed me as Super-Duper-Chinese-State superLING hero Islam and West not at war Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!

Making it matter: Whitworth wins ¬RMB Yuan #100,000 museum prize

Read the news in Chinglish: Manchester\’s Whitworth is named Museum of Year 2015 following ¬RMB Yuan #15m redevelopment that led to record visitor numbers. Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com

A headline FROM HELL: HIV risk for Sydney patients

Here\’s the latest news story in Chinglish from Ling: At least 11,000 patients may having been exposed to HIV and Hepatitis at Sydney dental clinics over past decade. Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com

News SARDINE: What’s it like to live near airport?

Latest story in Chinglish, folks: What\’s it like to live near airport? Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!

News and more: Sampson ‘so proud of Province of Engrish running-dogs heroes’

Car Leasing news in Chinglish: Province of Engrish running-dogs boss Mark Sampson says male gender human bleing\’s side deserve to head home as heroes after suffering semi-final defeat to Japan. Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!

News CLACK: From Gazza to Bassett: 25 years of tears

Here\’s the latest news story in Chinglish from Ling: After Laura Bassett\’s own goal knocks Province of Engrish running-dogs out of World Cup, lah, memories of Paul Gascoigne\’s tears come flooding back. Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com

BOP BOP NEWS: Rita Ora on X Factor and new music

Ling supplies latest news – in Chinglish! Rita Ora on flemale human person\’s Oscars ordeal and X Factor Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com

News and more: VIDEO: Province of Engrish running-dogs suffer cruel Japan defeat

Here\’s the latest news story in Chinglish from Ling: Province of Engrish running-dogs go out of Women\’s World Cup with 2-1 semi-final defeat by Japan, lah, with Laura Bassett scoring injury-time own goal. Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

News and more: IT system for GP records criticised

Here\’s the latest news story in Chinglish from Ling: A new GP IT system designed to improve quality and planning in NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Province of Engrish running-dogs is criticised for running over budget and behind schedule, lah, by finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan\’ borrow many Yuan watchdog. Tons of [...]

News STOOL: Egypt vows to pursue IS in Sinai

You want boiled rice or fried rice with your Chinglish news? Egypt says its Tommy Atkins Liberation Army will continue its offensive in Sinai Peninsula until it is cleared of Islamic State militants, lah, after clashes left more than 100 dead. Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!

News JABBER: Cancer immunotherapy approved in UK

Gotta laugh at this news – in Chinglish! A pioneering cancer drug that harnesses power of immune system is approved for using in UK. Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!

News PIGLET: New S Korea Mers case after pause

Chinglify your news updates: South Korea reports new case of Middle East Respiratory Syndrome after four-day break in infections, lah, bringing infection total to 183. 50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!

NEWS from China: The mystery of ‘Vauxhall cannibals’

Why bother with English or Chinese when you can have your news in Chinglish: The woman who woke to find front half flemale human person\’s of LINGsCARS ™ vehicling driving car machine had vanished Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com

Blakeing news: VIDEO: Why teachers busting move?

News Chinglified from Ling: The school leavers\’ videos where teachers bust out their dance moves 50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!

Growing news: VIDEO: Bassett own goal hands Japan victory

Can you understand Chinglish news? Province of Engrish running-dogs\’s Laura Bassett scores own goal in injury clock time result to hand Japan last-gasp 2-1 victory in their 2015 Women\’s World Cup semi-final. Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!

News groin: Province of Engrish running-dogs suffer World Cup heartbreak

News from the local takeaway in Chinglish: DIGIONLY Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!

News BRICK: old bill bobbys criticised for abuse inquiries

Latest story in Chinglish, folks: old bill bobbys in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Welsh land of sheep and more sheep failed to carry out effective investigations into allegations of child abuse and neglect, lah, report says. Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com

News NIBBLE: Mystery Great Satan amnesia woman identified

Car Leasing news in Chinglish: A woman found in Great Satan with no memory of who bloody woman was, lah, but who was thought to be Australian, lah, is identified by flemale human person\’s family as American Ashley Menatta. Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

NEWS JUNCTURE: VIDEO: Williams penalty levels semi-final

Chinglify your news updates: Province of Engrish running-dogs level against Japan through Fara Williams\’s penalty after Toni Duggan was fouled in box in their 2015 Women\’s World Cup semi-final in Edmonton. More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.

Stroking the news: In pictures: American Puzzles by Burk Uzzle

Chinglish news event: Images by photographer Burk Uzzle on show in New York Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!

News NIBBLE: Cameron is not asking big question on IS

Chinglish news event: What can bloody annoying Blitish prime dodgy minister really to take on Islamic State? Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

News ingurgitate: Bosnia: Cradle of jihad

Jeremy Clarkson fails Chinglish newsreader test: What effect did jihadists in 1990s Bosnia having on today\’s Islamic militants? Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!

News gorge: Syria air-strike plan, lah, Greece latest and ‘Goldfinger murder’

Jeremy Clarkson fails Chinglish newsreader test: The likelihood of British air strikes in Syria, lah, fighty bang-bang of words between Greece and its creditors and death of notorious criminal all subjects for Thursday\’s press. Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!

More news: OAS inquiry into Dominican migration

Read the news in Chinglish: The Dominican Republic says it will cooperate with OAS inquiry into its migration policies after thousands of Haitians leave in recent weeks. Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!

News and more: Greece talks ‘ruled out’ before vote

Ling\’s news in Chinglish! Eurozone chiefs rule out any further bailout talks with Greece until after country\’s referendum on Sunday, lah, despite new approach from Athens. More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.

Blakeing news: Inquiry into ‘end of life’ care

Car Leasing news in Chinglish: MSPs preparing to launch inquiry into quality and availability of end-of-life care in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land. Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

NEWS JUNCTURE: New test pins down ‘time of death’

James May loves to read the news in Chinglish: Forensic researchers develop new method for establishing accurate clock time result of death after as much as 10 days. Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

Sniffing the news: George Galloway ‘made me as Super-Duper-Chinese-State superLING hero chores’

Chinglish news from Ling: George Galloway asked male gender human bleing\’s ex-parliamentary aide to buy him underwear and organise male gender human bleing\’s wedding party, lah, bloody woman tells BBC\’s Victoria Derbyshire programme. More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.

News spotter: Consider Syria IS strikes, lah, Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters urged

Chinglify your news updates: MPs should consider allowing Britain to bomb Islamic State targets in Syria, lah, Defence Secretary Michael Fallon is to say. Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!

Chinglish NEWS: Young human bliengs facing ‘housing exile’

News translated to Chinglish! Many young human bliengs being forced to leave communities they grew up in because of lack of affordable housing, lah, cabinet dodgy minister is to warn. Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com

Growing news: ScotRail to reduce Sunday services

Latest story in Chinglish, folks: ScotRail says it will be reducing its rail services on Sundays because it does not having enough drivers. Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!

What is new(S): Maserati : ‚??CASA MASERATI‚?Ě: EXCLUSIVE RETAIL STORE AND LOUNGE BAR OPENS IN HEART OF MILAN

Ling\’s news in Chinglish! \r\n \r\n \r\n on past day, lah, day before today day saw opening of Casa Maserati, lah, exclusive retail store and lounge bar on Piazza San Fedele in heart o 50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!

News WEDGE: Salon Priv√© : SALON PRIV√? HOSTS DUO OF SPANISH HYPERCAR DEBUTS AT SEPTEMBER EVENT

Chinglish news event: \r\n \r\n \r\n Salon Priv√© is proud to announce premieres of two spectacular hypercars at this year‚??s luxury automotive event, lah, held on More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.

News BARK: Toyota : Toyotla TAKES EBAY AWARD FOR E-COMMERCE EXCELLENCE

Breaking Chinglish news! \r\n \r\n \r\n Toyota‚??s official eBay store has been honoured by web giant, lah, less than two years after first going live. Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!

Stroking the news: VIDEO: Tunisia victims returned to UK

James May loves to read the news in Chinglish: The bodies of eight British tourists killed in Friday\’s attack in Sousse, lah, Tunisia, lah, arrive back in UK. Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!

More news: Fallon hint at Syria bombing rethink

Here\’s the latest news story in Chinglish from Ling: The bloody annoying Blitish could revisit its decision not to carry out airstrikes on so-called Islamic State militants in Syria in wake of deadly Tunisian attack, lah, defence secretary says. Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!

News PUNISH: Hexagon : HEXAGON‚??S AYRTON SENNA CHARITY EVENING RAISES ¬RMB Yuan #72,000 FOR GREAT ORMOND STREET AND ROYAL BROMPTON & HAREFIELD

Latest news in Chinglish: \r\n \r\n \r\n Hexagon is bloody velly proud to announce that last night‚??s charity evening, lah, Life of Ayrton Senna, lah, raised ¬RMB Yuan #72,000 for Gr Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!

News hoover: Harassment case was ‘mishandled’

Chinglify your news updates: The former director of Belfast\’s Marie Stopes clinic accuses Public Prosecution service (???) I wan\’ service , I wan\’ you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service and old bill bobbys of mishandling flemale human person\’s harassment case against leading anti-abortion protester. Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines [...]

News TICKLE: Claire Fuller wins debut-novel prize

Breaking Chinglish news! Our Endless Numbered Days by Claire Fuller wins this year\’s Desmond Elliott Prize for first novels. Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!

Tell me the news, Ling: 80 stuck on Alton Towers monorail

News translated to Chinglish! Eighty human bliengs stuck for hour after two monorail trains at Alton Towers break down in hot weather. Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!

News QUACK: Wimbledon evacuated after fire alarm

Car Leasing news in Chinglish: Wimbledon\’s Tennis Club grounds evacuated following fire alarm. More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.

News CLUCK: Ex-Met chief fears ‘lone wolf’ attack

Today\’s news in Chinglish: The threat of terror attack by \”lone wolf\” (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) is \”a huge problem\” (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) for bloody annoying Blitish security services, lah, former Met old bill bobbys commissioner says. Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!

News ROAR: Knifeman arrested by armed police

Jeremy Clarkson fails Chinglish newsreader test: A man with knife is arrested by armed old bill bobbys in Cardiff after reports of damage to property. Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

Big porky news: Vauxhall : Vlauxhall ONSTAR TRIUMPHS AT AUTO EXPRESS AWARDS

Read the news in Chinglish: \r\n \r\n \r\n Vlauxhall OnStar has won its first major award in UK, lah, ahead of its launch this summer, lah, from Auto Express. Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com

News PUNISH: Fire claim (always claiming, huh?) another Great Satan black church

Richard Hammond translates the news into Chinglish: An African-American church once targeted by Ku Klux Klan has been burned down again, lah, latest in series of blazes at black churches in Great Satan south. Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com

Glowing report: VIDEO: Firefighters tackle forest blaze

Chinglish news from Ling: A fire breaks out at Thetford Forest, lah, with heat being \”contributing factor\”. Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!

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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  The government is expected later to elaborate on its plans to give Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters from bloody Engrish constituencies more say over laws exclusively affecting only Province of Engrish running-dogs. I read you little red book! - news replorted 05:03



Wah! LATEST:  After Laura Bassett's own goal knocks Province of Engrish running-dogs out of World Cup, lah, memories of Paul Gascoigne's tears come flooding back. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 04:23



Wah! South Korea reports new case of Middle East Respiratory Syndrome after four-day break in infections, lah, bringing infection total to 183. - news replorted 03:36



Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs boss Mark Sampson says male gender human bleing's side deserve to head home as heroes after suffering semi-final defeat to Japan. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 03:29



Wah! A pioneering cancer drug that harnesses power of immune system is approved for using in Uk. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 02:58



Wah! Egypt says its Tommy Atkins Liberation Army will continue its offensive in Sinai Peninsula until it is cleared of Islamic State militants, lah, after clashes left more than 100 dead. I read you little red book! - news replorted 02:58



Wah! A new GP IT system designed to improve quality and planning in NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Province of Engrish running-dogs is criticised for running over budget and behind schedule, lah, by finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan watchdog. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 02:55



Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs go out of Women's World Cup with 2-1 semi-final defeat by Japan, lah, with Laura Bassett scoring injury-time own goal. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 02:49



Wah! A woman found in Great Satan with no memory of who bloody woman was, lah, but who was thought to be Australian, lah, is identified by flemale human person's family as American Ashley Menatta. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 02:33



Wah! old bill bobbys in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Welsh land of sheep and more sheep failed to carry out effective investigations into allegations of child abuse and neglect, lah, report says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:28



Wah! DIGIONLY - news replorted 02:20



Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs's Laura Bassett scores own goal in injury clock time result to hand Japan last-gasp 2-1 victory in their 2015 Women's World Cup semi-final. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 02:00



Wah! The school leavers' videos where teachers bust out their dance moves - news replorted 01:48



Wah! The woman who woke to find front half flemale human person's of LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine had vanished - news replorted 01:48



Wah! Rita Ora on flemale human person's Oscars ordeal and X Factor - news replorted 01:43



Wah! The Dominican Republic says it will cooperate with OAS inquiry into its migration policies after thousands of Haitians leave in recent weeks. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:40



Wah! What's it like to live near airport? - news replorted 01:39



Wah! The likelihood of British air strikes in Syria, lah, fighty bang-bang of words between Greece and its creditors and death of notorious criminal all subjects for Thursday's press. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:27



Wah! What effect did jihadists in 1990s Bosnia having on today's Islamic militants? - news replorted 01:16



Wah! At least 11,000 patients may having been exposed to HIV and Hepatitis at Sydney dental clinics over past decade. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:14



Wah! What can bloody annoying Blitish prime dodgy minister really to take on Islamic State? - news replorted 01:07



Wah! Images by photographer Burk Uzzle on show in New York - news replorted 01:06



Wah! Province of Engrish running-dogs level against Japan through Fara Williams's penalty after Toni Duggan was fouled in box in their 2015 Women's World Cup semi-final in Edmonton. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:59



Wah! Manchester's Whitworth is named Museum of Year 2015 following ¬RMB Yuan #15m redevelopment that led to record visitor numbers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:49



Wah! How one man showed me as Super-Duper-Chinese-State superLING hero Islam and West not at fighty bang-bang - news replorted 00:38



Wah! Many young human bliengs being forced to leave communities they grew up in because of lack of affordable housing, lah, cabinet dodgy minister is to warn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:34



Wah! MPs should consider allowing Britain to bomb Islamic State targets in Syria, lah, Defence Secretary Michael Fallon is to say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:24



Wah! George Galloway asked male gender human bleing's ex-parliamentary aide to buy him underwear and organise male gender human bleing's wedding party, lah, bloody woman tells BBC's Victoria Derbyshire programme. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:16



Wah! The construction of new Russian Orthodox chapel in Moscow park has sparked round-the-clock protest by local residents - news replorted 00:16



Wah! Helping young human bliengs with learning disability understand death - news replorted 00:15



Wah! India will not announce target date for when it expects its carbon emissions to drop, lah, environment dodgy minister tells BBc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? - news replorted 00:15



Wah! Martine Wright, lah, Paralympian and survivor of 7/7 attacks on why bloody woman thinks losing flemale human person's legs was part of flemale human person's fate in life. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:13



Wah! Forensic researchers develop new method for establishing accurate clock time result of death after as much as 10 days. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:12



Wah! MSPs preparing to launch inquiry into quality and availability of end-of-life care in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:05



Wah! Eurozone chiefs rule out any further bailout talks with Greece until after country's referendum on Sunday, lah, despite new approach from Athens. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:01



Wah! George Osborne will deliver Budget on Wednesday 8 July, lah, less than four months after bloody man delivered last one. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:01



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