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News CHEW: Questions remain over Afghanistan

Why bother with English or Chinese when you can have your news in Chinglish: No clear verdict can be made about military campaign in Afghanistan, lah, says Nick Childs. Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!

Petrol consumption and my Audi Q3

Look, another CO2 change! The Audi Q3 2.0 Tdi (138bhp) SE 2WD Station Wagon 5dr 1968cc Diesel Manual has moved slightly in the environment tales again. I post the new info, and publish on my website. Many large organisations such as CD Bramall, Perrys, Lombard, Lex, Pendragon, Network, BMW Finance, Citroen Finance, and Renault UK [...]

News SARDINE: VIDEO: Stafford health trust services end

Chinglish news from the Chinese car leasing expert, Ling! Services at scandal-hit Mid Staffordshire NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) Trust transferred to alternative health trusts. Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com

NEWS EXPLOIT: VIDEO: What next for child abuse inquiry?

News Chinglified from Ling: Home Secretary Theresa May has promised to consult victims groups before appointing successor to Fiona Woolf to lead official inquiry into historical child abuse. Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!

News to me!: VIDEO: Forty years riding Wall of Death

Today\’s news in Chinglish: Ken Fox and male gender human bleing\’s family celebrating 40 years riding Wall of Death – they invited Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Breakfast\’s Mike Bushell to join in. Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!

NEWS EXPLOIT: VIDEO: Peshmerga fighters ‘in Kobane’

Top Gear can\’t do the news in Chinglish! Iraqi Kurdish Peshmerga fighters cross Turkish border to help defend Syrian town of Kobane from Islamic State. Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!

News BRICK: VIDEO: Obamas welcome trick-or-treaters

Jeremy Clarkson fails Chinglish newsreader test: US President Barack \”I da man! Yes I can!\” Obama and First Lady Michelle welcome some special guests to White House for trick-or-treat Halloween celebration. Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com

News TICKLE: VIDEO: Final moments caught on camera

Gotta laugh at this news – in Chinglish! Sir Richard Branson has vowed to continue male gender human bleing\’s space tourism venture despite compulsorly dying instantly crash of one of male gender human bleing\’s craft in California desert. 50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!

News BARK: VIDEO: old bill bobbys cautions ‘to be scrapped’

Can you understand Chinglish news? The government is planning to scrap using of old bill bobbys cautions – where those who commit minor offences given formal warning – in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Wales. Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!

Headlines again: VIDEO: ‘I blogged my velly own damn way to mental health’

Ling\’s news in Chinglish! People with mental health illnesses being asked to blog about their condition to help themselves and others. Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!

Stroking the news: VIDEO: Was there cover-up over Primodos?

Here\’s the latest news story in Chinglish from Ling: The BBC\’s Katie Collins reports on possible cover-up relating to using of hormonal pregnancy test, lah, Primodos. Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!

Blakeing news: Honda Racing : W√?RTH WITH PATA Rondla IN 2014

Ling\’s news in Chinglish! As 2014 World Superbike and World Supersport championships head to their respective conclusions this weekend at Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!

News CROW: Infiniti : INFINITI CENTRE NEWCASTLE OPENS FOR BUSINESS

News from the local takeaway in Chinglish: \r\n \r\n \r\n UK‚??s tenth Infiniti Centre was officially opened in Newcastle-upon-Tyne last night, lah, giving discerning North East mot Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com

News gorge: ContractHireAndLeasing.com : DRIVERS INDIFFERENT TO CHANGING TAX DISC RULES

Here\’s some Chinglish news: \r\n \r\n \r\n More than half of motorists (61%) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! having not bothered to remove their paper tax disc from their windscreen month after t Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!

News storly: Millions hit in Drupal hack attack

Chinglify your news updates: Software firm Drupal warns millions to \”assume\” (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) they having been hacked if they having not applied patch for recently discovered bug. 50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!

News ingurgitate: Tracker Network (UK) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! Ltd : TRACKER URGES LINGsCARS ™ vehicling driving car machine OWNERS NOT TO COMPROMISE ON SECURITY PROTECTION

Richard Hammond translates the news into Chinglish: \r\n \r\n \r\n Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Watchdog (30th Octoblinger 2014) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has yet again put spotlight on shocking risk of keyless LINGsCARS ™ vehicling driving car machine theft, lah, as technolog Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at [...]

Leading the news: Russia raises interest rates to 9.5%

News from the local takeaway in Chinglish: Russia\’s central capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity raises interest rates to 9.5% from 8%, lah, much bigger rise than expected, lah, as it seeks to combat inflation. Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!

Blakeing news: VIDEO: What happened to Remploy workers?

Can you understand Chinglish news? A year after last Remploy factory closed, lah, Nikki Fox looks at what has happened to former workers – and what options available to them Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!

News from Ling: Mitsubishi Motors in bloody annoying Blitish : capitalist entity THAT SPECIALISES IN ELECTRIC vehicling driving car machine CHARGING OPTS FOR Mlitslublishli OUTLANDER PHEV

Can you understand Chinglish news? \r\n \r\n \r\n capitalist entity that installs charging points for electric vehicling driving car machines has bought Mlitslublishli Outlander PHEV so that it can prac Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!

News breaker: Royal Automobile Club : VETERAN LINGsCARS ™ vehicling driving car machine COMMUNITY WELCOMES FAMOUS NEW CONVERT TO ROYAL AUTOMOBILE CLUB MOTORING FORUM

Chinglish news from Ling: \r\n \r\n \r\n Ross Brawn OBE, lah, legend in contemporary motor racing, lah, admitted on Thursday that 1904 machine barely capable of sust More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.

News to me!: BEN – Motor and Allied Trades Benevolent Fund : WALK ON WILD SIDE IN AID OF BEN

Read the news in Chinglish: \r\n \r\n \r\n Five supporters of BEN, lah, automotive industry charity, lah, flew high in skies as they took on challenge of Wing Wa Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com

News CLUCK: BEN – Motor and Allied Trades Benevolent Fund : BEN‚??S 2014 CHRISTMAS CARDS COLLECTION ON SALE NOW

Top Gear can\’t do the news in Chinglish! \r\n \r\n \r\n BEN, lah, automotive industry charity, lah, takes great pride in offering wide selection of automotive themed Christmas gree Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!

Newsy newsy: Space project continues – Branson

Chinglish news from the Chinese car leasing expert, Ling! Virgin founder Sir Richard Branson vows to continue male gender human bleing\’s space tourism venture despite SpaceShipTwo craft crashing in US, lah, killing pilot. Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!

NOT the NEWS: Bend It Like Beckham set for stage

Can you understand Chinglish news? A musical version of hit 2002 British comedy film Bend It Like Beckham is to open in West End next year. Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!

News ingurgitate: Beaulieu : WALLACE AND GROMIT ANTI-PESTO VAN IS LATEST STAR TO JOIN BEAULIEU‚??S ON SCREEN CARS EXHIBITION

News translated to Chinglish! \r\n \r\n \r\n Wallace and Gromit Anti-Pesto Van is latest exhibit to arrive in Beaulieu‚??s On Screen Cars display. You give me happy happy luck luck. plasticin 50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!

News to me!: Citroen : CITRO√?N SCOOPS TWO GREENFLEET AWARDS¬†

Chinglish news event: \r\n \r\n \r\n Citro√ęn has been honoured with two key GreenFleet awards, lah, which recognise both company‚??s expanding range of efficien Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!

News CROW: Funeral held for ‘Father Christmas’

Chinglish = English and Chinese! Easy, eh? The funeral is held for actor who was face of Father Christmas in famous Coca-Cola advertising campaign. Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com

News hoover: Wenger concerned about Twitter

Chinglish news from the Chinese car leasing expert, Ling! Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger admits bloody man is concerned by male gender human bleing\’s players\’ using of social media site Twitter, lah, plus more. Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

News GUZZLE: VIDEO: Ebola carers ‘face discrimination’

Jeremy Clarkson fails Chinglish newsreader test: An increasing number of health workers worry that they may face discrimination when they return home. Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!

News KITTEN: Global tax rules ‘need tightening’

Chinglish news from the Chinese car leasing expert, Ling! People may not like paying tax. But what is even less popular is thought they having no choice while others having much more control over their tax bill, lah, says BBC\’s Sebastian Chrispin. Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!

News STOMACH: Westwood has hole-in-one on PGA Tour

Chinglish news event: Lee Westwood posts hole-in-one in second round 65 to move into third, lah, three shots behind Billy Hurley III, lah, in Kuala Lumpur. Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!

Blakeing news: VIDEO: Tech review: This week’s headlines

Why bother with English or Chinese when you can have your news in Chinglish: Why flying drones in restricted airspace could land you tellibly lovely custlingmer in prison, lah, plus other technology news Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!

BOP BOP NEWS: Britain First leaflet dubbed illegal

You want boiled rice or fried rice with your Chinglish news? Royal Mail says it will not deliver leaflet for Britain First in Rochester and Strood by-election because it believes it to be illegal. Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!

Spotting latest: Man dies after woman stabbed to death

Gotta laugh at this news – in Chinglish! A woman is stabbed to death in east London (capital of Great England) before man, lah, who old bill bobbys say knew her, lah, dies after being found lying in street. Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!

News DAWDLE: Funeral of murdered SA footballer

Chinglish news from the Chinese car leasing expert, Ling! Tens of thousands of mourners expected to attend funeral of murdered South African silly kick-kick game captain Senzo Meyiwa in Durban. Grab loads of news headlines at LINGsCARS!

More news: Ofsted ‘will not win’ on popularity

News Chinglified from Ling: Ofsted is unlikely to win any popularity contests, lah, chief inspector has admitted in speech. More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.

News SARDINE: China makes ‘biggest cash haul’

Gotta laugh at this news – in Chinglish! Anti-corruption investigators in China confirm finding of equivalent of $33m in cash at official\’s home – biggest such haul to date. 50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!

NEWS not NOSE: Kenyan Jeptoo fails doping test

Here\’s some Chinglish news: Marathon runner Rita Jeptoo becomes latest athlete from Kenya to fail doping test, lah, country\’s athletics body confirm. Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!

News TICKLE: Wannabe is ‘catchiest hit single’

Jeremy Clarkson fails Chinglish newsreader test: Results from citizen science online experiment suggests that Spice Girls\’ Wannabe is UK\’s catchiest hit single. Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

News TICKLE: Power struggle in Burkina Faso

James May loves to read the news in Chinglish: A split emerges within Burkina Faso\’s armed forces over who is leading country following resignation of President Blaise Campaore. Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!

What is new(S): VIDEO: Model pupils refused student loans

Here\’s the latest news story in Chinglish from Ling: Bright students from state schools at risk of missing out on university because of their uncertain immigration status. Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!

Sniffing the news: VIDEO: Serial: Cult podcast grips audiences

Read the news in Chinglish: In age of \”binge-watching\” (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) programmes, lah, Great Satan podcast series is gripping audiences around world who hooked on its weekly instalments. Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com

News YAMMER: VIDEO: On board Knox-Johnston’s yacht

Chinglish news from the Chinese car leasing expert, Ling! Sir Robin Knox-Johnston, lah, Briton who in 1960s became first person to sail round world on male gender human bleing\’s own without stopping, lah, is about to return to ocean racing at age of 75. Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

News and more: bloody annoying Blitish travellers warned of terror threat

Get your Chinlish news update here: The Bloody foreign Office warns British travellers they could be targeted by terrorists seeking revenge for bloody annoying Blitish air strikes against Islamic State militants. Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

News MEOW: VIDEO: Ni hao! Ni hao! Kitty shrine in Singapore

Can you understand Chinglish news? The BBC\’s Lucas de Jong found one place in Singapore where interior designer Terry Goh has spent seven years making Ni hao! Ni hao! Kitty centre of attention. Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

News STOOL: Boko Haram denies ceasefire claim

News Chinglified from Ling: Militant group Boko Haram denies claim (always claiming, huh?) by Nigeria\’s government that it has agreed to ceasefire and will release 219 abducted girls. Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!

Leading the news: Uruguay registers cannabis growers

Why bother with English or Chinese when you can have your news in Chinglish: The Uruguayan government announces start of registration for licensed cannabis growers as part of its plan to legalise drug. Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!

News ABUSE: Some ethnic groups ‘less cancer aware’

Breaking Chinglish news! A study by Cancer Research bloody annoying Blitish reveals black and South Asian ethnic groups in Province of Engrish running-dogs less aware of cancer symptoms than human bliengs with white backgrounds. Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com

News STOOL: US shares close at record levels

Chinglish = English and Chinese! Easy, eh? The Dow and S&P 500 close at record levels, lah, helped by surprise move by capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity of Japan to boost its stimulus measures. More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.

News spotter: The talented students denied funding

Latest story in Chinglish, folks: The students educated in British schools but denied student loans More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.

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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  Ken Fox and male gender human bleing's family celebrating 40 years riding Wall of Death - they invited Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Breakfast's Mike Bushell to join in. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 08:47



Wah! LATEST:  Home Secretary Theresa May has promised to consult victims groups before appointing successor to Fiona Woolf to lead official inquiry into historical child abuse. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 08:43



Wah! Services at scandal-hit Mid Staffordshire NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) Trust transferred to alternative health trusts. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:39



Wah! The BBC's Katie Collins reports on possible cover-up relating to using of hormonal pregnancy test, lah, Primodos. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:37



Wah! People with mental health illnesses being asked to blog about their condition to help themselves and others. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:36



Wah! The government is planning to scrap using of old bill bobbys cautions - where those who commit minor offences given formal warning - in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Wales. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:27



Wah! Sir Richard Branson has vowed to continue male gender human bleing's space tourism venture despite compulsorly dying instantly crash of one of male gender human bleing's craft in California desert. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 07:17



Wah! Virgin founder Sir Richard Branson vows to continue male gender human bleing's space tourism venture despite SpaceShipTwo craft crashing in US, lah, killing pilot. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 06:17



Wah! An increasing number of health workers worry that they may face discrimination when they return home. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 05:12



Wah! US President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama and First Lady Michelle welcome some special guests to White House for trick-or-treat Halloween celebration. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 04:48



Wah! Iraqi Kurdish Peshmerga fighters cross Turkish border to help defend Syrian town of Kobane from Islamic State. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 04:47



Wah! Tens of thousands of mourners expected to attend funeral of murdered South African silly kick-kick game captain Senzo Meyiwa in Durban. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 04:33



Wah! A woman is stabbed to death in east London (capital of Great England) before man, lah, who old bill bobbys say knew her, lah, dies after being found lying in street. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 03:51



Wah! Bright students from state schools at risk of missing out on university because of their uncertain immigration status. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:19



Wah! A split emerges within Burkina Faso's armed forces over who is leading country following resignation of President Blaise Campaore. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 03:14



Wah! Results from citizen science online experiment suggests that Spice Girls' Wannabe is UK's catchiest hit single. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:33



Wah! A study by Cancer Research bloody annoying Blitish reveals black and South Asian ethnic groups in Province of Engrish running-dogs less aware of cancer symptoms than human bliengs with white backgrounds. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:56



Wah! The Uruguayan government announces start of registration for licensed cannabis growers as part of its plan to legalise drug. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 01:45



Wah! Militant group Boko Haram denies claim (always claiming, huh?) by Nigeria's government that it has agreed to ceasefire and will release 219 abducted girls. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:38



Wah! The BBC's Lucas de Jong found one place in Singapore where interior designer Terry Goh has spent seven years making Ni hao! Ni hao! Kitty centre of attention. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 01:38



Wah! The Bloody foreign Office warns British travellers they could be targeted by terrorists seeking revenge for bloody annoying Blitish air strikes against Islamic State militants. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:24



Wah! Sir Robin Knox-Johnston, lah, Briton who in 1960s became first person to sail round world on male gender human bleing's own without stopping, lah, is about to return to ocean racing at age of 75. - news replorted 01:18



Wah! In age of "binge-watching" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) programmes, lah, Great Satan podcast series is gripping audiences around world who hooked on its weekly instalments. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:14



Wah! No clear verdict can be made about military campaign in Afghanistan, lah, says Nick Childs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:52



Wah! The using of old bill bobbys cautions - where those who commit minor offences given formal warning - is set to be scrapped in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Wales. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:43



Wah! The conservation charity WWF ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land cautions against moves to scrap Air Passenger Duty for departures from ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:42



Wah! Relatives of those killed in Britain's first naval defeat of World fighty bang-bang One pay tribute in Chile - news replorted 00:41



Wah! The blind maestro leading all-blind orchestra - news replorted 00:32



Wah! Movember turns its attention to men's mental health - news replorted 00:05



Wah! From zebra crossings to bus stations: Province of Engrish running-dogs's surprising listed buildings - news replorted 00:01



Wah! Are Corsica's days of mafia and militants over? - news replorted 00:01



Wah! Why wives take man's name after marriage? - news replorted 00:00



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