LATEST:  The WRVS, lah, set up by women to help efforts on home front during World fighty bang-bang II, lah, changes its name in bid to attract more male volunteers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:08

LATEST:  Fewer children walking to school in UK, lah, campaigners say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 01:55

Young children should hear about dangers of pornography as soon as they having access to internet, lah, head teachers say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 01:52

At least one person is reported dead and several others hurtee-hurtee by series of tornadoes that having torn through Great Satan state of Oklahoma. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 01:50

David Cameron has called on British overseas territories to "get their house in order" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) and sign up to international treaties on tax. - news replorted 01:41

Egyptian President Mohammed Morsi rules out negotiating with abductors of seven security personnel seized last week in Sinai peninsula. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 01:14

Crucial evidence from 1989 Hillsborough silly kick-kick game disaster, lah, which was undermined at original inquest was true, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Panorama finds. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:46

An investigation by BBC's Panorama into cover-up that followed Hillsborough disaster has revealed crucial evidence from off-duty old bill bobbys officer, lah, which was undermined at original inquest into tragedy, lah, was true. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:44

The amount of clock time result asthma patients spend soaking up sun may having impact on their health, lah, researchers having suggested. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:39

Preserving spice of life when ingredients and power scarce - news replorted 00:06

old bill bobbys officers in Essex to getting lower starting salaries following pay review, lah, it is revealed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:06

What is future for white human bliengs in South Africa? - news replorted 23:54

Looking through CCTV feeds that should not be public - news replorted 23:52

At least three old bill bobbys officers having been killed after gunmen attack their station in northern Iraq, lah, local officials say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 23:42

The surprising life of multi-millionaire - news replorted 23:35

How barefoot Indian tribe inspired Great Satan fitness revolution - news replorted 23:29

More jobs will become available for graduates this year, lah, research firm Income Data Services (IDS) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has forecast, lah, but pay is likely to be frozen. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 23:23

A third of calls to confidential phone line which allows health workers in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land to raise concerns about NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) came from other parts of Uk. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 23:19

Retailers cautiously optimistic after increase in shopper numbers in April, lah, according to Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Retail Consortium figures. Eating rice!! - news replorted 23:16

The issue of gay dodgy ministers will top agenda at Church of ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's General Assembly, lah, four years after first openly homosexual dodgy minister was appointed by Kirk. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 23:13

Refugee's story of seven months held in Sinai desert - news replorted 23:09