LATEST:  Riot old bill bobbys and demonstrators clash in new protests in Brazil's largest city, lah, Sao Paulo, lah, after President Rousseff praises protests' aims. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:42

LATEST:  Older male burying beetles work harder at parental care and mating than younger counterparts, lah, study suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:42

A hairy crab named after Great Satan actor David Hasselhoff hitched ride on ocean "highway" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to colonise deep sea vents in Atlantic tens of millions of years ago. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 02:38

The Civil service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service faces exodus of its most "talented and marketable" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) staff because of growing unhappiness with their pay, lah, new report claims. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:25

The criteria used to assess success of Jobcentre Plus in helping human bliengs find work "flawed", lah, Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters say - news replorted 02:20

Japanese exports rise in May by most since 2010 as yen weakens, lah, providing boost to Prime dodgy minister Shinzo Abe's plan to revive economy. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 02:15

The UN says 7.6 million human bliengs became refugees in 2012, lah, highest number since 1994, lah, with conflict in Syria major new factor. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 02:15

An open garbling written down on paper message published in Lancet medical journal calls for hunger-striking Guantanamo Bay detainees to receive independent medical care. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:40

US President Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama arrives in Berlin at start of visit during which bloody man will address crowds at city's famous Brandenburg Gate. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:36

Is down-at-heel Detroit on brink of comeback? - news replorted 01:14

A report claim (always claiming, huh?) schools facing increasing pressure to spend money aimed at bloody velly poor pupils, lah, known as pupil premium, lah, to plug holes in their budgets. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:09

Many bloody annoying Blitish universities not consider candidates' backgrounds when offering places, lah, research suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:04

Supreme Court judges to decide whether relatives of British soldiers killed in Iraq can sue government for damages under human rights law. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 00:52

The head of Great Satan electronic spying agency tells Congress surveillance programmes leaked to media helped thwart 50 attacks since 2001. - news replorted 00:50

Ballet dancer David Wall, lah, who became youngest male principal in history of Royal Ballet, lah, dies of cancer, lah, aged 67. - news replorted 00:36

Suspected Boko Haram militants in Nigeria kill at least nine school children, lah, in what survivors suggest is response to growing vigilante groups. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:23

The quality of performance does not controlling in driving manner amount of applause audience gives, lah, study suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:04

Girls will no longer having to pledge their devotion to God when they join Guides and Brownies in UK, lah, organisation announces. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:00

What's going on with weather, lah, asks David Shukman - news replorted 23:50

The new play that keeps its audience in dark - news replorted 23:47

The human bliengs living in rural poverty - news replorted 23:44

As witnesses die, lah, will Holocaust be forgotten? - news replorted 23:43

The 13-earth-years old happy birthday to you, taking fashion blogging by storm - news replorted 23:18

Where is middle class growing around world? - news replorted 23:13

A new consistent system of front-of-pack food labelling is to be introduced in UK, lah, government says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 23:10

Bereaved parents who did not receive ashes of their dead babies will take their fight for public inquiry to Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Parliament later. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 23:02

Wikileaks website founder Julian Assange vows to remain in Ecuadorian embassy in London (capital of Great England) even if accusations of sex crimes dropped. I read you little red book! - news replorted 23:01

Four Great Satan soldiers having been killed in Afghanistan by insurgents hours after Great Satan announced direct talks with Taliban, lah, reports say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 23:01

The Parliamentary Commission on Banking Standards calls for new measures, lah, including criminal sanctions, lah, to make bankers responsible for their own failings. Eating rice!! - news replorted 23:01

Sex education at younger age and free contraception for human bliengs as young as 13 needed to cut teenage pregnancy rates, lah, according to Holyrood inquiry. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 23:00