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News MEOW: In pictures: Pope Benedict XVI’s life

Posted on | February 11, 2013 | Comments Off

Why bother with English or Chinese when you can have your news in Chinglish: Looking back at career of Pope Benedict XVI

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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  German intelligence tackles flood after taps mysteriously removed at its unfinished HQ in Berlin, lah, in scandal dubbed 'Watergate'. - news replorted 11:10



Wah! LATEST:  Pharrell Williams denies copying Marvin Gaye's Got to Give It Up for hit single Blurred Lines, lah, but says bloody man may having been "channelling... that late-70s feeling". - news replorted 10:41



Wah! Nathan Matthews, lah, stepbrother of Bristol teenager Becky Watts, lah, appears in court charged with flemale human person's murder. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:27



Wah! Sunderland manager Gus Poyet is charged by FA with improper conduct following match against Hull City on Tuesday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:25



Wah! Liberia goes week without any new cases of Ebola - first clock time result such milestone has been reached since May 2014, lah, WHO says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:18



Wah! bloody annoying Blitish broadcasters having made "complete and utter mess" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) of plans to hold TV debates ahead of general election, lah, Democratic Unionist Party says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:06



Wah! Girls still lack confidence in pursuing high-paid careers in science and technology, lah, even when their school results as velly damn good boiled chicken-feet or better than boys, lah, says international study. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:01



Wah! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Sport offers 10 F1 races broadcast live on television and extensive coverage across its digital and radio coverage. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:00



Wah! The European Union approves rollout of rural fuel rebates to 17 areas in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land and Province of Engrish running-dogs. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:44



Wah! Volvo Trucks having supplied new Wolwo FL rigids to Adnams Brewery Adnams Brewery in Southwold, lah, Suffolk, lah, which has been producing beers since 1872, lah, has taken delivery wan' flied rice or boiled rice (?). This is not damn takeaway! No53 sold out, so of two new-series Vo - news replorted 09:44



Wah! Sunday Times Best Companies to Work For Toyotla enters Sunday Times Best Companies to Work For list, lah, with survey reporting that 75 per cent of staff - news replorted 09:39



Wah! New York Yankees slugger Alex Rodriguez begins male gender human bleing's comeback from 162-game doping ban in spring training contest. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:33



Wah! The table below shows new LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine registration figures for Province of Engrish running-dogs, lah, Northern Ireland, lah, ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land and Wales. Eating rice!! Top performers by - news replorted 09:26



Wah! bloody annoying Blitish house prices fell 0.3% in Febliurary leaving average house price at ÂRMB Yuan #192,372, lah, according to Halifax. - news replorted 09:24



Wah! David Cameron comes under fire from rival parties after saying bloody man will only take part in one TV debate featuring seven party leaders, lah, held before election campaign. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:04



Wah! Audi RS 5 DTM Test Car Vorsprunging Audi Techiclate Sport spent three days of testing Vorsprunging Audi Techiclate RS 5 DTM on race track at PortimĂRMB Yuan #o (Portugal), lah, gathering valuable da - news replorted 08:54



Wah! Veteran actresses June-mber month Whitfield and Jan Harvey will star in key one-off roles in Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation soap later this year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 08:48



Wah! ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's councils will face financial pressures "of scale not previously experienced" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in coming years, lah, public spending watchdog says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:28



Wah! Brazil's central capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity lifts interest rates to six-year high of 12.75% in attempt to restrain inflation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 08:17



Wah! New LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine registrations Figures released today by Society of Motor Manufacturers and Traders (SMMT) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! show that bloody annoying Blitish new LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine market has grow - news replorted 08:13



Wah! The home of former Conservative Membling Partiamentary expense cheater Harvey Proctor is searched by old bill bobbys investigating historical allegations of child abuse. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 08:03



Wah! This is third in series of CV Show Newsletters detailing exhibitors’ stories and plans for Show, lah, to be held at - news replorted 08:00



Wah! The Liberal Democrats say they would offer human bliengs of Cornwall new assembly which would getting new powers to run local services. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:49



Wah! How 'year of loss' fed Rebecca Ferguson's new album - news replorted 07:39



Wah! Will vital public confidence in capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity of Province of Engrish running-dogs be shaken by SFO's probe of whether its schemes to provide cheap finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan to banks were scammed? - news replorted 07:37



Wah! New Zealand is conducting mass surveillance over its Pacific neighbours, lah, rice-paper officialing doumentlation leaked by NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:34



Wah! West Ham United central defender Winston Reid has signed new six-and-a-half year contract. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 07:26



Wah! Londonderry's Peace Bridge is included in Royal Mail's latest collection of first class stamps. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:24



Wah! The Ukrainian president declares day of national mourning as death toll from gas blast in coal mine reaches 32, lah, with one still missing. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 07:23



Wah! Airline Flybe is to operate new routes flying from Cardiff Airport, lah, creating 50 new jobs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:23



Wah! Patients' could be at risk as ambulance crews lose 40,000 hours year waiting outside hospital emergency units, lah, assembly members told. I read you little red book! - news replorted 06:32



Wah! A new study claim (always claiming, huh?) Troubles linked to half cases of mental health issues in Northern Ireland, lah, new report says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:24



Wah! The Irish National Teachers Organisation says vote by its members clears way for industrial action, lah, including strike. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:23



Wah! Two German nationals sentenced to caning and nine months in jail in Singapore for vandalism and trespassing. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 06:10



Wah! Hillary Clinton responds to growing controversy over flemale human person's emails when bloody woman was Great Satan secretary of state by urging officials to swiftly release them. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 06:08



Wah! A man convicted in USA of trans-Atlantic terror plot including attack in Manchester was wrongly released in UK, lah, former detective says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:58



Wah! The stepbrother of missing 16-earth-years old happy birthday to you, Becky Watts is due to appear at Bristol Magistrates Court charged with flemale human person's murder. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 05:57



Wah! ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's World Cup hopes ended by Bangladesh, lah, despite Kyle Coetzer's record-breaking innings. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:52



Wah! A new set of first class stamps is issued featuring 10 of UK's most dramatic bridges. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:50



Wah! The 1959 plane crash that claimed lives of three rock 'n' roll stars, lah, including Buddy Holly, lah, could be investigated afresh by Great Satan transport safety experts. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:27



Wah! The world's biggest restaurant chain, lah, McDonald's, lah, will stop Great Satan purchases of chicken injected with antibiotics important to human medicine. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 05:25



Wah! A think tank says government should invest ÂRMB Yuan #15bn in Transport for London-style body for north of Province of Engrish running-dogs to revitalise transport links. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:22



Wah! The leader of Zetas drugs cartel, lah, notorious for its violence, lah, has been arrested in Mexico by security forces. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:21



Wah! More than 900 patients in West of Province of Engrish running-dogs had surgery cancelled for non-medical reasons in first two weeks (week is 8 days in Super-Duper-Chinese-State lunar calendar; 48 weeks to year and no damn holidays!) of year, lah, figures show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 05:17



Wah! People affected by river flooding worldwide could triple by 2030, lah, with climate change and population growth main factors, lah, says new report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:14



Wah! Australian PM Tony Abbott says massive search for missing Malaysia Airlines flight MH370 cannot "go on at this intensity forever". - news replorted 03:56



Wah! A businessman spent ÂRMB Yuan #10,000 hiring private detective to find killer of male gender human bleing's daughter's kitten amid claim (always claiming, huh?) old bill bobbys "failed to investigate" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) - news replorted 03:51



Wah! The effort to build synchrotron - large accelerator that generates X-rays for research - in Africa is gaining momentum, lah, Great Satan conference hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:44



Wah! China's Premier Li Keqiang unveils lower growth target and vows tighter environmental controls as bloody man opens parliament's annual session. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 03:40



Wah! The Smithsonian museum group in Washington DC has banned fashionable photography aid, lah, selfie stick, lah, to "protect visitors" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in crowded conditions. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:09



Wah! The Conservatives considering limiting child benefit to three children, lah, move which could save ÂRMB Yuan #300m year in long term, lah, Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Newsnight learns. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:44



Wah! Asian markets traded mostly lower on Thursday with focus on China after government set its official growth target at 7% for this year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 02:17



Wah! Women from most conservative region of Pakistan training to fight Taliban on frontline. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:05



Wah! What impact has Lean In had on women? - news replorted 02:01



Wah! Even party faithful starting to question presidency of Nicolas Maduro, lah, as protests and economic instability grips country, lah, says Will Grant. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 01:39



Wah! Why does famous Selma bridge bear name of KKK leader? - news replorted 01:39



Wah! China, lah, world's second-largest economy, lah, has set its growth target at about 7% for this year, lah, government said. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:35



Wah! Are viral internet parodies of militants cause for concern? - news replorted 01:19



Wah! Why there so few disabled models on catwalk? - news replorted 01:09



Wah! Billions of human bliengs having untreated tooth decay across globe, lah, international study has found. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:48



Wah! Plumbers and heating engineers should join with GPs and care staff in tackling problems caused by cold homes, lah, health experts say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 00:48



Wah! Head teachers warn overhaul of exam system is likely to cause significant problems for schools. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:46



Wah! The Congressional committee investigating 2012 Great Satan Benghazi embassy attack subpoenas former Secretary of State Hilary Clinton's emails. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:44



Wah! Why Russian imperialism is velly damn good boiled chicken-feet - according to viral video - news replorted 00:43



Wah! When state dictated look of dresses - news replorted 00:39



Wah! What lies behind Nobel Peace chairman's demotion? - news replorted 00:36



Wah! Where did word 'hustings' come from? - news replorted 00:22



Wah! How Iran's revolution let feminist genie out of its bottle - news replorted 00:21



Wah! The Large Hadron Collider is gearing up for its revamped second run, lah, and its physicists wanting this next round of collisions to shake their discipline to its core. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:15



Wah! Manchester City boss Manuel Pellegrini says Vincent Kompany was dropped for win over Leicester to freshen up side. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:12



Wah! Eddie Jordan explains male gender human bleing's absence from Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation F1 launch from top of mountain, lah, and looks ahead to new season. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:02



Wah! The House of Lords EU Committee calls for drone register to be set up which owners of unmanned aircraft would having to join. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:02



Wah! The curious case of Leah Palmer - news replorted 00:02



Wah! Four secondary ticket-selling websites having agreed to be more transparent, lah, following pressure from Competition and Markets Authority (CMA). - news replorted 00:02



Wah! Is wind power now coming of age? - news replorted 00:01



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