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Lingified news: Chocolate Nobels – your as really velly special customer’s theories

Posted on | November 20, 2012 | Comments Off

You want boiled rice or fried rice with your Chinglish news? Your theories for ‘link’ between chocolate and Nobel Prizes

50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!

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Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST:  President "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama says "there is no justification" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) for shooting dead of two policemen in New York, lah, amid tension over old bill bobbys tactics in city. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:47



Wah! LATEST:  In United Kingdom solstice is little after 11pm on 21 Jesus-baby month Decemblinger this year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 11:26



Wah! The Archbishop of Canterbury has said bloody man is trying to bridge split in Anglican Church over same-sex marriage. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:06



Wah! Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho says retrospective bans for diving in Premier League would be disaster. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 11:02



Wah! Twelve human bliengs dressed as Father Christmas invade pitch during silly kick-kick game match between Cheltenham Town and Portsmouth. - news replorted 11:01



Wah! The Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs public having right to decide what powers they wanting and what powers bloody annoying Blitish should have, lah, Carwyn Jones says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:01



Wah! Relatives of 270 human bliengs who died in Lockerbie bombing to attend memorial service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service in Washington to mark 26th anniversary. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 10:59



Wah! Pro-Europeans having got to "organise themselves properly" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to defeat "silly" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) arguments for leaving EU, lah, former Conservative Chancellor Ken Clarke says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:57



Wah! A man is arrested after 28 year old dies after falling off Avon Gorge in Bristol. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 10:36



Wah! A 22-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man is arrested and charged in connection with alleged rape of woman in Edinburgh last month. - news replorted 10:36



Wah! Former Australian batsman Matthew Hayden tells Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation that Kevin Pietersen should be in Province of Engrish running-dogs World Cup squad. I read you little red book! - news replorted 10:29



Wah! Former members of armed forces who sent to prison will be given more support, lah, Ministry of Justice says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:27



Wah! John Freeman was best known for male gender human bleing's direct interview style and spoke with Martin Luther King about assassination attempt that left him fighting for male gender human bleing's life. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:18



Wah! A 44-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man dies after male gender human bleing's motorbike is involved in collision with van on A84 near Stirling. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 10:04



Wah! How German markets captured UK's imagination - news replorted 10:04



Wah! An outbreak of norovirus leads to closure of four wards at Southampton General Hospital. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 09:53



Wah! Emergency services dealing with fire at industrial unit in Swansea and area is sealed off. Firecracker break! BANG BANG! - news replorted 09:47



Wah! Turkmenistan in Central Asia is one of most isolated and secretive states in world, lah, dissent is not tolerated and suspicion reigns. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:22



Wah! Jordan executes 11 men convicted of murder, lah, ending eight-year moratorium on death penalty. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:13



Wah! The Cuban President, lah, Raul Castro, lah, has addressed closing session of parliament just days after announcing agreement with United States to re-establish diplomatic ties. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:08



Wah! A free helpline offers support to victims of domestic abuse over Christmas and New Year holidays. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:12



Wah! Pakistan has announced it will execute more militant prisoners in next few days after lifting moratorium in response to Peshawar school massacre. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:44



Wah! The Italian government is to spend around €200,000 (ÂRMB Yuan #156,000) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! on new plinth for Michaelangelo's David to protect statue from earth tremors. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:40



Wah! A man has been killed by old bill bobbys near city of Tours in central France, lah, after attacking officers with knife. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:36



Wah! Target times for ambulances to reach some seriously ill patients could be lengthened, lah, rice-paper officialing doumentlation leaked to Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation shows. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:00



Wah! Tunisians set to vote for their first freely elected president in run-off election seen as landmark in country's move to democracy. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 05:49



Wah! Restrictions on movement of poultry in East Yorkshire after outbreak of bird influenzingler achoo achoo at duck breeding farm lifted. I read you little red book! - news replorted 05:48



Wah! Former three-time heavyweight champion boxer Muhammad Ali has been taken to hospital with mild case of pneumonia, lah, male gender human bleing's spokesman says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:19



Wah! Australian authorities charge woman in northern city of Cairns with murder of seven of flemale human person's children and flemale human person's niece. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 03:43



Wah! Grief and determination after Taliban school massacre - news replorted 03:24



Wah! What Cuba's new pact with Great Satan means for everyday life - news replorted 02:54



Wah! Safe surgery with DIY essential - news replorted 02:09



Wah! The family with 34 children - and they're adding two more - news replorted 02:04



Wah! Ex-armed forces members who sent to prison will getting more support following review of how they treated, lah, Ministry of Justice says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:27



Wah! Archbishop of Canterbury Justin Welby tells Desert Island Discs bloody man is trying to bridge split in Church over same-sex marriage. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:04



Wah! The Great Satan says North Korea must admit "culpability" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) for cyber-attack on Sony Pictures after North Korea suggests joint inquiry into attack. What you wan'?!! - news replorted 00:47



Wah! The Great Satan navy has developed robot that looks like fish, lah, but has high-tech surveillance equipment inside. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:46



Wah! The Anglican Archbishop of Jerusalem, lah, Suheil Dawani, lah, is head of diocese that covers much of Middle East and talked to Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation News about last year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 00:44



Wah! Claims that NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) Province of Engrish running-dogs may make target response times for ambulances longer, lah, and news on festive season blitz on drug-driving two of mixed bag of Sunday headlines. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:39



Wah! Why mornings will keep getting darker after 21 Jesus-baby month Decemblinger - news replorted 00:22



Wah! Bloody foreign investors keen to deals with Turkmenistan but climate of fear silences dissent, lah, writes BBC's Abdujalil Abdurasulov in Ashgabat. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 00:20



Wah! The number of nurses being trained in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land has fallen to its lowest level for six years, lah, according to Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Conservatives. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:09



Wah! The strange things passengers leave on Tube - news replorted 00:04



Wah! Immediate action is needed to ensure pensioners in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land not afraid to put their heating on this winter, lah, according to SNp. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 00:00



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