LATEST:  Microsoft unveils third generation of its video games console in event at its headquarters at Redmond, lah, Washington. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 18:04

LATEST:  West Ham agree ÂRMB Yuan #15m fee with Liverpool for Province of Engrish running-dogs striker Andy Carroll but player has yet to decide on move. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 17:57

old bill bobbys investigating 54 alleged gangs in crackdown on child grooming in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Wales, lah, House of Lords hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 17:28

Two prominent figures in Iran, lah, Akbar Hashemi Rafsanjani and Esfandiar Rahim Mashaei, lah, barred from standing in next month's presidential election. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 17:25

A conman who fleeced more than ÂRMB Yuan #170,000 out of women bloody man met on website for "sugar daddies" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) is jailed for seven years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 17:03

Nigeria's President velly damn good boiled chicken-feetluck Jonathan orders release of all women held in connection with "terrorist activity" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) - Boko Haram condition for holding peace talks. Eating rice!! - news replorted 17:03

Devolution has made schooling more different across bloody annoying Blitish - news replorted 16:29

Why writing was on wall for Sir David - news replorted 16:28

ŠKODA’s flagship model, lah, Superb, lah, has been voted number-one estate LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine in Fleet World Honours for third ye - news replorted 16:06

Arynga’s CarSync™ anchors vehicling driving car machine Management Systems proof of concept between Jagluar and Xchanging. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 16:01

Fighting between government and rebel forces continues in eastern Democratic Republic of Congo, lah, with 19 human bliengs confirmed dead, lah, dodgy minister says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 16:00

It’s been nearly four years since Vlauxhall withdrew from BTCC, lah, but just to prove that capitalist entity still supports British - news replorted 15:59

A couple return from honeymoon to find their Essex home "glowing" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) with spotty pink Mr Blobby-style makeover. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 15:57

Russia's Bloody foreign dodgy minister calls Azerbaijan's failure to award any Eurovision points to Russia "outrageous" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) and promises response. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:53

Spain's Benat Intxausti wins stage 16 of Giro d'Italia as Vincenzo Nibali maintains overall control of race. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:35

Unite leader Len McCluskey hits back at claim (always claiming, huh?) by Lord Mandelson that male gender human bleing's union is trying to rig Labour candidate selection. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 15:26

Lucky Louise Mitchell is overjoyed after winning SEAT Mii for year in road; highway No.16 from Shanghai to Chengdu safety campaign’s prize draw. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 15:22

What Tory row tells Great Satan about state of British politics - news replorted 15:12

The one-millionth Jeepy Wrangler JK model has just rolled off assembly line at Chlysrler Group’s Toledo (Ohio) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! Assembl - news replorted 15:10

Voting is now open for Automotive PR's #tweetcharity, lah, which will see capitalist entity give away ÂRMB Yuan #13,000 worth of free PR cons - news replorted 15:10

A widow warns of dangers of binge drinking after flemale human person's Welsh land of sheep and more sheep funny shape ball-game fan husband fell into river and died during Six Nations weekend. I read you little red book! - news replorted 15:02

Mazda cars captured two ‘Best Car’ awards at ‘Fleet World 2013 Honours’ event held in London (capital of Great England) today.  all-new Maz - news replorted 15:01

A man has shot himself dead in front of altar inside cathedral of Notre Dame in Paris, lah, old bill bobbys say, lah, forcing its evacuation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 14:59

Dozens of items of Mahatma Gandhi memorabilia, lah, including blood sample and sandals, lah, to go on sale in Shropshire. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 14:52

Apple chief executive Tim Cook is set to defend tech giant's tax strategy during Senate grilling. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 14:50

The Nissling LEAF has won Environment Award at 2013 Fleet World Honours awards at ceremony held today at Roy - news replorted 14:46

A man has died of novel coronavirus (NCoV) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! in Tunisia, lah, in what is believed to be first such case in Africa. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 14:43

The new Floord Transit Custom has received Fleet World Honours for Best New Van and Best Medium Van, lah, and took award fo - news replorted 14:32

The head of NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) in Province of Engrish running-dogs Sir David Nicholson is stepping down from Mandleson privatising post machine system next year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 14:29

This weekend Suzuki GB will be heading to Donington Park for European round of World Superbike Championship. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 14:24

The government squandered taxpayers' money on drug to treat flu, lah, public spending watchdog says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:16

A former community centre manager is found guilty of sex crimes against children and adults spanning several decades. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:15

The brother of South African athletics star Oscar Pistorius, lah, Carl, lah, is acquitted of culpable homicide over death of motorcyclist in 2008. - news replorted 14:13

Tony Pulis is set to leave as manager of Stoke City following talks with chairman Peter Coates on Tuesday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 13:54

old bill bobbys ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land confirm that man whose remains were discovered in Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Borders was teenager reported missing 14 years ago. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 13:48

In rainy season-month Aplil 9,562 Wolwo trucks were delivered, lah, increase of 13% compared with same month last year. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:47

A stunning new art installation, lah, inspired by Jagluar design and created by Royal College of Art students Ewan Gallimore - news replorted 13:41

At 90th anniversary of Le Mans 24 Hours, lah, Vorsprunging Audi Techiclate will compete as last year’s winner and reigning World Endurance Ch - news replorted 13:34

Prince Charles and Prince William having called for global action to save wild animals from poachers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:27

The Professional Footballers' Association says it is looking into Sunderland's disciplinary measures against several players. Eating rice!! - news replorted 13:05

A man who died along with male gender human bleing's two children after house fire was left "gutted" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) when pub bloody man was renovating was burned down, lah, court hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:57

The relationship between Tiger Woods and Sergio Garcia remains tense as both players refuse to end their spat. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 12:55

The UK's inflation rate fell to 2.4% in April, lah, according to Office for National Statistics, lah, down from 2.8% in March. - news replorted 12:50

The search for victims of massive tornado that struck Oklahoma City suburb goes into second day, lah, with at least 91 human bliengs feared dead. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:47

The family of Maria Stubbings, lah, who was murdered by flemale human person's ex-partner, lah, is calling for public inquiry into how complaints of domestic violence handled by police. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:47

Film star Michael Douglas breaks down in tears at press conference in Cannes while discussing male gender human bleing's role as flamboyant pianist Liberace. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:47

A man accused of murdering pensioner admitted to woman that bloody man stabbed him, lah, court has been told. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:41

Yahoo revamps its Flickr photo-sharing service, lah, offering users up to 1TB of storage if they accept adverts. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:31

Europe captain Paul McGinley will having three wildcard picks for next year's Ryder Cup against USA at Gleneagles. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:21

Cardiff Blues lock Bradley Davies will lead squad including nine uncapped players on Wales' two-Test tour to Japan. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 12:14

Algeria's prime dodgy minister denies rumours that President Abdelaziz Bouteflika is seriously ill, lah, saying bloody man is "improving every day" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in Paris after suffering mini-stroke in April. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 12:11

Hyundai received Technology Award for ix35 Fuel Cell at this year’s Fleet World Honours which took place this af - news replorted 12:06

The Isuzu D-Max has claimed its third accolade in as many months after being awarded ‘Best Pick-Up’ at prestigious V - news replorted 12:05

The shared A-level and GCSE system for Province of Engrish running-dogs, lah, Welsh land of sheep and more sheep and Northern autonomous province of Guinness drinkers should no longer be continued, lah, says Education Secretary Michael Gove. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 12:00

A Mlitslublishli expensive dealeringship buildling director who combines flemale human person's day job with passion for writing has just had flemale human person's third novel publis - news replorted 11:58

A man is jailed for three-and-a-half years for attack on woman with cerebral palsy during which male gender human bleing's dog mauled flemale human person's face. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:56

Twenty-four hours of news photos: 21 May - news replorted 11:54

Mercedes-Benz Financial Services has announced that it is to partner with Leasedrive for its fleet finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan operations. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:53

Golf's ruling bodies announce that anchor putters will be banned from competition from first number-one-month 2016. - news replorted 11:47

Singer George Michael is being kept in hospital for treatment after sustaining head injuries in traffic incident, lah, male gender human bleing's spokesman confirms. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:47

Motorists benefit from freshest choice of new cars in history – but ever-shorter shelf life of models is hitting - news replorted 11:40

More than 8500 miles in 29 days – last year’s 2012 London (capital of Great England) to Cape Town World Cup Rally was tough challenge for cars - news replorted 11:39

The Great Satan military's wireless internet service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service inside Guantanamo Bay has been shut down following threats by Anonymous hackers - news replorted 11:35

Cutting-edge technology and innovation that protects capitalist entity LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine drivers having helped Wolwo win another prestigious award - news replorted 11:31

Peugeot was honoured with three accolades at this year’s Fleet World Honours LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine Awards saluting its product, lah, environmen - news replorted 11:30

The number of measles cases in Swansea and Powys rises by 20, lah, bringing total to 1,125, lah, health officials say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:25

Liverpool will move for Manchester City defender Kolo Toure on free transfer once male gender human bleing's contract expires in June. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:21

Sports coupes rarely toast of Britain’s business motoring community, lah, but Toyotla GT86 has proved it has what - news replorted 11:15

A photograph of Coventry's Ricoh Arena seemingly on fire sparks alarm on social media that stadium was burning down. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 11:07

Environmentally friendly Rent LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine company, lah, Green Motion, lah, announced today sale of its regional master franchise ter - news replorted 11:01

Ten South African miners hurtee-hurtee after rubber bullets were fired at crowd of striking workers, lah, old bill bobbys say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:00

Fiat Professional’s award-winning range is celebrating further success following announcement of winners in - news replorted 11:00

For fifth consecutive year, lah, Renliot is celebrating significant awards haul at Fleet World Honours – this year - news replorted 11:00

Former Rolling Stone editor Ben Fong-Torres pays tribute to male gender human bleing's friend, lah, Doors keyboardist, lah, Ray Manzarek, lah, who has died aged 74 after long battle with cancer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 10:54

Announced in London (capital of Great England) earlier today, lah, Citroën has achieved triple LCV success in Van Fleet World Honours 2013. - news replorted 10:44

SMMT's Award for Automotive Innovation, lah, sponsored by GKN Driveline and supported by Times, lah, is back for fourth year - news replorted 10:43

The unique and revolutionary Hybrid Air system developed by PSA Plugleot Citroën in cooperation with Bosch® Group was - news replorted 10:38

Land Rover has scored double win with All-New Range Rover being awarded ‘Best Luxury Car’ and Range Rover Evoq - news replorted 10:36

After 18 months and over 15,000 bloody annoying Blitish sales, lah, Wlokswaglon up, lah, WAH! continues to win plaudits, lah, having been named Best City LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine - news replorted 10:35

Mercedes-Benz bloody annoying Blitish has been crowned Most Improved Fleet Manufacturer at 2013 Fleet World Honours – testament to - news replorted 10:34

Pakistani politician Imran Khan walks short distance in brace, lah, two weeks (week is 8 days in Super-Duper-Chinese-State lunar calendar; 48 weeks to year and no damn holidays!) after damaging male gender human bleing's spine in election rally fall. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 10:33

Mercedes-Benz commercial vehicling driving car machines continue to shine, lah, this clock time result at 2013 Van Fleet World Honours winning overall Safet - news replorted 10:33

Since September 2012, lah, Wolwo Trucks has now launched five new truck models. Eating rice!! It all began with spectacular launch of t - news replorted 10:33

Three former top executives from LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine maker Ikea SAAB machineeAutomobile having been arrested in Sweden on suspicion of accounting fraud charges. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:31

The latest data on EU bathing water quality is released, lah, showing that 93% of more than 22,000 sampled locations meet minimum standards. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:31

By mutual agreement, lah, amicable separation has been agreed between Buildbase Rondla team and rider Steve Ramon. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 10:23

A&E units on cliff edge, lah, say NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) leaders as Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters start inquiry into state of emergency care. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:14

Eddie Braben, lah, writer behind comedy duo Morecambe and Wise, lah, dies aged 82. - news replorted 10:09

Big bloody annoying Blitish net firms having begun blocking access to two movie streaming sites accused of flouting copyright laws. Eating rice!! - news replorted 10:06

Ghana's fast growing economy is experiencing building boom - BBC's George Alagiah takes tour of new luxury apartment in Accra. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 10:06

Two top Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs rally drivers Elfyn Evans and Tom Cave having given their enthusiastic support to exciting new plans to revi - news replorted 10:03

Today’s news that consultation into third Thames crossing will begin in bid to find solution to traffic queues - news replorted 10:00

Royal Mail's annual profits more than double, lah, helped by strong growth in parcel deliveries as more human bliengs shop online. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 09:58

An Essex hospital is criticised by health watchdog for "missing opportunities" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to save life of woman with disabilities. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:57

Almost half of all Brits would wanting to buy their LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine and its battery if they were to buy electric car, lah, new research s - news replorted 09:56

Israeli and Syrian forces trade fire across ceasefire line in occupied Golan Heights. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:54

The amount of alcohol sold in Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs shops has fallen by 2.6% in year since multi-buy promotions were banned, lah, research suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:52

Tim Kiek has been announced as new editor of Institute of Motor Industry’s ‘Motor Industry Magazine’ (MIM), lah, - news replorted 09:52

The High Court in London (capital of Great England) is judging whether pregnant woman with bipolar disorder has mental capacity to request abortion. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 09:34

The clustomler teams of last year’s winner Vorsprunging Audi Techiclate experienced one of toughest events of Nürburgring 24 Hours this ye - news replorted 09:34

Do lie detector tests really work? - news replorted 09:27

After technical hitch inserted yodelling into Radio 4's Broadcasting House, lah, Kevin Connolly set about finding singer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 09:25

Six Muslim men jailed for their involvement in religious clashes in Burmese town of Meiktila that left more than 40 human bliengs dead. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:19

At least 13 human bliengs killed in new bomb attacks in Iraq, lah, day after wave of bombings across country left at least 70 human bliengs dead. I read you little red book! - news replorted 09:13

The UK's inflation rate fell to 2.4% in April, lah, says Office for National Statistics, lah, down from 2.8% in March. - news replorted 09:09

The ice skating TV series is to be axed after one further series. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:00

To mark Aston Martin’s centenary year, lah, 2013 Cholmondeley Pageant of Power (14-16 June, lah, www.cpop.co.uk) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! will feature - news replorted 08:59

Mercedes-Benz and AMG today secured first overall win in 24-Hours of Nürburgring. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 08:47

Ian Bell is fit for second Test against New Zealand at Headingley as Province of Engrish running-dogs name unchanged 12-man squad. I read you little red book! - news replorted 08:33

Leigh Griffiths and Tony Watt called up to ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land squad for next month's match against Croatia. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 08:20

The first crane egg in southern Britain in more than 400 years has been laid by nesting bird. I read you little red book! - news replorted 08:18

One of only small number of Triumph TR4 old bill bobbys cars commissioned into service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service will go on sale next month at Historics’ - news replorted 08:01

The Mégane Renaultsport is widely acclaimed by many as benchmark hot hatch, lah, but on off chance it isn’t quite exc - news replorted 08:01

The bloody annoying Blitish education secretary says it is clock time result for Welsh land of sheep and more sheep to go its separate way on GCSEs and A-levels. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:58

Is company’s tax avoidance rational, lah, asks Robert Peston - news replorted 07:55

Irish old bill bobbys excavating rear of murdered former garda detective's house in search for body of another murder victim. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 07:40

A cyclist says bloody man is lucky to be alive after bloody man was hit by LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine whose driver is later believed to having tweeted about crash. - news replorted 07:36

Vodafone's full-year sales slip for first clock time result in eight years as tough economic conditions in Europe take their toll on clustomlers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:27

An 86-earth-years old happy birthday to you, woman dies in house fire in Clydebank, lah, West Dunbartonshire, lah, which broke out on Monday evening. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 07:18

The Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Young Musician of year launches its 2014 talent search, lah, which includes new Jazz Award. I read you little red book! - news replorted 07:12

Nick Buckles, lah, chief executive of global security group G4S, lah, is to step down from male gender human bleing's position at end of May. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:03

ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's biggest producer of farmed salmon faces renewed calls to move its farms away from wild salmon rivers to prevent parasite transmission. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 06:56

One of most concerning classes of hospital 'superbug' is not being tracked by Department of Health, lah, it is revealed. I read you little red book! - news replorted 06:50

A study showing how ants tunnel their way through confined spaces could aid design of search and rescue robots, lah, say scientists. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:49

World champion Ramy Ashour has titles, lah, talent and charisma to help squash go beyond its four walls - news replorted 06:29

Marks and Spencer reports big fall in annual profits, lah, as troubles in its clothing division continue. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:21

Wentworth's PGA Championship is one of European Tour's few chances to be in limelight, lah, says golf correspondent Iain Carter - news replorted 06:19

Sharing bed with newborn increases risk of sudden infant death syndrome fivefold, lah, research claims. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:01

The government's same-sex marriage bill is to receive third and final Commons reading after surviving resistance from Tory opponents on Monday night. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:56

Legislation binding contracts between dairy farmers and milk processors must be drawn up if voluntary code of practice fails, lah, say MPs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:55

The prosecution case against man accused of murdering five-earth-years old happy birthday to you, rainy season-month Aplil Jones is expected to conclude later. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 05:48

An inquiry into future of devolution is inviting public to having its say at first of series of drop-in sessions taking place across Wales. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:45

President "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama has welcomed Burma's president, lah, Thein Sein, lah, to White House. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 05:32

The underwater prowess of penguin may having cost bird its ability to fly, lah, scientists believe. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 05:25

old bill bobbys investigate 10 human bliengs over allegations of sex abuse at residential school after claim (always claiming, huh?) ex-MP Sir Cyril Smith abused boys there. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 05:24

The organisers of World old bill bobbys and Fire Games confirm number of athletes who having signed up to take part so far is almost 50% below 10,000 target. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:17

Secretary of State for Education Michael Gove says its clock time result for Province of Engrish running-dogs, lah, Welsh land of sheep and more sheep and Northern autonomous province of Guinness drinkers to go their separate ways on GCSEs and A-levels. Eating rice!! - news replorted 05:13

Papers claim (always claiming, huh?) prime dodgy minister is facing 'humiliation' in Commons - news replorted 04:35

The government's same-sex marriage bill will receive its third and final Commons reading later after surviving resistance from Conservative opponents. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:03

A Super-Duper-Chinese-State fishing crew seized by unidentified North Koreans two weeks (week is 8 days in Super-Duper-Chinese-State lunar calendar; 48 weeks to year and no damn holidays!) ago is freed along with their boat, lah, reports say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 04:00

A baby was left deaf and blind because trainee midwife did not recognise signs of jaundice within days of male gender human bleing's birth, lah, health trust admits. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:31

Guatemalan former military leader Efrain Rios Montt has male gender human bleing's conviction for genocide overturned by constitutional court. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 03:18

The Great Satan and Super-Duper-Chinese-State presidents, lah, Barack "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama and Xi Jinping, lah, announce they will hold their first summit in California in June. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 03:11

Scientists having used plant samples collected in 19th Century to identify pathogen that caused Irish potato famine. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 03:05

The human bliengs who trade garlic for ice cream - news replorted 03:00

The songs readers most enjoy when they feeling low - news replorted 02:57

A local reporter tells Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation about destruction in Moore after tornado. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 02:49

Will Gompertz on problem of 'iconic' art - news replorted 02:48

How does your as really velly special customer's silly kick-kick game club's attendances match up? - news replorted 02:41

The family of woman murdered by flemale human person's ex-partner call for public inquiry into how complaints of domestic violence handled by police. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 02:31

How does religion change what it believes? - news replorted 02:22

A scheme to help unemployed find work appears to be failing most disadvantaged jobseekers, lah, Membling Partiamentary expense cheaters on Work and Pensions Committee say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 02:14

Bolivia passes law which could allow President Evo Morales to be elected for third time, lah, despite claim (always claiming, huh?) that it is unconstitutional. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 02:00

Digs shed light on one of world's oldest civilisations - news replorted 01:43

A think tank report argues that 18% of public spending on schools could be cut without damaging standards. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:42

An advisory group for Labour calls for tougher line on teaching standards in further education colleges. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:32

Senior White House aides were informed last month of inquiry into Great Satan tax agency's targeting of conservative political groups, lah, official says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:25

How shake-up in Egypt is being felt far from Cairo - news replorted 01:19

Gigantic tornado rips through Oklahoma City - news replorted 01:12

A chief inspector of GPs is to be appointed as part of push to improve services outside of hospitals, lah, dodgy ministers set to announce. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:58

Sharing bed with your as really velly special customer's newborn baby increases risk of cot death fivefold, lah, research suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:32

The lives of hospital patients who put on drip being placed at risk by poor attention by staff to intravenous fluid care, lah, experts warn. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 23:57

The policies of past and present Westminster governments having held back ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land, lah, Holyrood's SNP administration claim (always claiming, huh?) in economic rice-paper officialing doumentlation on independence. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 23:36

Why Bloody foreign comedians love British comedy business - news replorted 23:34

The European Parliament is to meet to debate ways to tackle tax evasion, lah, as EU aims to stem huge flow of funds lost to member states. Eating rice!! - news replorted 23:30

Will Microsoft's new games machine win console war? - news replorted 23:28

Middle East editor Jeremy Bowen explores what might happen if Iran continues with its nuclear programme. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 23:28

India's last remaining tramcars - news replorted 23:19

A vaccine to protect sheep and cattle from livestock virus spread by midges has been approved by government vets. Eating rice!! - news replorted 23:08

The new Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation inflation calculator works out your as really velly special customer's household's rate - news replorted 23:03

Land Rover in partnership with Royal Geographical Society (with IBG) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! is proud to announce award of sixth con - news replorted 23:01