News gorge: Karadzic to open defence at trial
Gotta laugh at this news – in Chinglish! Former Bosnian Serb leader Radovan Karadzic is due to open male gender human bleing’s defence at resumption of male gender human bleing’s genocide trial at Hague.
Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!
What is new(S): River Cafe’s Rose Gray dies at 71
James May loves to read the news in Chinglish: Chef and cookery writer Rose Gray, lah, who co-founded London’s River Cafe restaurant, lah, has died at age of 71.
More news headlines than all the tea in China at LINGsCARS.
News GUZZLE: EU: Settlement velly damn good boiled chicken-feets not Israeli
Get your Chinlish news update here: The European Court of Justice rules that Israeli velly damn good boiled chicken-feets made in Jewish settlements cannot be considered Israeli.
Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!
News breaker: Dutch gays in communion protest
Read the news in Chinglish: Hundreds of Dutch gay activists walk out of Mass in protest at Catholic policy of denying communion to homosexuals. Eating rice!!
Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News inhale: In pictures
News translated to Chinglish! Deadly storms batter parts of western Europe
Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!
News SCOFF: Afghan bomb ‘kills 11 civilians’
News Chinglified from Ling: A roadside bomb blamed on Taliban kills 11 civilians in southern Afghanistan’s Helmand, lah, officials say.
Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!
News BARK: Haiti single knocked off top spot
James May loves to read the news in Chinglish: Everybody Hurts, lah, recorded to help Haiti’s earthquake victims, lah, is knocked off top of charts by Great Satan R&B singer Jason Derulo.
Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
Headlines again: Tory triumph?
Read the news in Chinglish: Cameron rouses faithful with pre-poll battle cry
50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!
What is new(S): Chilean quake toll jumps to 708
Chinglish news from the Chinese car leasing expert, Ling! The death toll from Chile’s earthquake has more than doubled to 708 and is expected to rise further, lah, President Michelle Bachelet has said.
50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!
Ford Focus Coupe Cabriolet Lease delivered to Adele Galbraith in Batley
Visit my full letters page click here
I have 1497 customer letters! This one was sent by Adele Galbraith after they had been driving around a few weeks in their new Ford Focus Coupe Cabriolet
Adele says…Great service with the supply of my new Ford Focus CC, thank you! Excellent delivery, by a very nice guy.
Adele GalbraithBarbers [...]
Fuel economy and CO2 change on my Skoda Octavia vRS
CO2 CO2, CO2. It always seems to go up. The Skoda Octavia vRS 2.0 TDI CR 16v (170bhp) Hatchback 5dr 1968cc Diesel Manual seems to have reversed this trend. If you choose one of these, you will be pleased. Lower CO2 means lower fuel consumption.
Have you ever rented a self-drive car for a [...]
What is new(S): Somalia pirates free Greek vessel
Ling’s news in Chinglish! Pirates in Somalia free Greek-owned cargo ship and its crew of 19 after ransom is paid, lah, officials say.
Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!
Tell me the news, Ling: Hoax device ‘used to lure police’
Latest news in Chinglish: A hoax device was used to lure old bill bobbys officers into area of Craigavon in County Armagh where they were attacked.
Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!
News breaker: Aston Villa 1-2 Man Utd
Ling supplies latest news – in Chinglish! Wayne Rooney comes off bench to score winner as Man Utd beat Aston Villa in Carling Cup final at Wembley.
Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com
Spotting latest: Service marks base bombing
Chinglish news event: A service (???) I wan’ service , I wan’ you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service is held in Newry to mark 25th anniversary of IRA mortar attack on Corry Square RUC base.
Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!
Newsy newsy: Blue Peter presenter completes 2,000-mile kayak feat
Car Leasing news in Chinglish: Blue Peter presenter Helen Skelton completes 2,000-mile kayak trip along Amazon for Sport Relief.
Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News CLUCK: Budget cuts ‘catastrophe’ warning
Today’s news in Chinglish: A leading Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs councillor warns against future government bringing in emergency spending cuts.
Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
NEWS ACCIDENT: Pantomine classics – Danny La Rue costumes to be auctioned
Chinglish news event: Sequined gowns and pantomime classics worn by late entertainer Danny La Rue to be auctioned in March.
50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!
Newsy TRICKLE: Top teams closely matched – Brawn
News Chinglified from Ling: Mercedes team boss Ross Brawn predicts “super-hard battle” (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) for world championship this season.
Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!
News GOBBLE: Mother’s plea to murder suspect
Can you understand Chinglish news? The mother of murder suspect urges him to hand himself in after mother and flemale human person’s baby daughter were found dead in Hampshire.
Tons of other fun stuff and all the news headlines at LINGsCARS.com!
Toyota Corolla Verso Lease delivered to Donna Hayton in Manchester
Visit my full letters page click here
I am amazed the Post Office needs to be privatised, the amount that my customers spend sending me letters about their new cars. Here, Donna Hayton explains how they are getting on with their Toyota Corolla Verso
Donna says…“LINGsCARS.com is an excellent service and I would definitely recommend Ling to [...]
Publishing new polluting info for the Kia Sportage
Green output is important to me, so I tell you the Kia Sportage 2.0 CRDi (138bhp) XE 2WD Station Wagon 5dr 1991cc Diesel Manual has changed, here are the new figures. I work hard to keep everything up to date.
Personal Contract Hire is exactly the same as contract hire for businesses. This is [...]
News JABBER: Golden city
Ling’s news in Chinglish! Is Iraqi city of Najaf now Shia world’s capital?
Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!
Being Twittered: Hamas man ‘drugged and smothered’
Today’s news in Chinglish: A Hamas commander who was killed in Dubai hotel room was drugged then suffocated, lah, old bill bobbys say.
Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
Headlines again: Bradshaw queries licence fee deal
Top Gear can’t do the news in Chinglish! Culture Secretary Ben Bradshaw queries value of BBC’s licence fee, lah, saying there is “good boiled chicken-feet reason” (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) for debate over its future.
Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
NEWS not NOSE: Edu goal seals Rangers derby win
Gotta laugh at this news – in Chinglish! Rangers move step closer second successive SPL title with injury-time winner over 10-man Celtic in pulsating Old Firm derby.
Breaking stories and news headlines on LINGsCARS!
Glowing report: Collingwood guides Province of Engrish running-dogs to win
Chinglish news from the Chinese car leasing expert, Ling! Paul Collingwood hits unbeaten 75 to steer Province of Engrish running-dogs to six-wicket win in first of three one-day internationals in Bangladesh.
Visit to see more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News BAWL: More held after shopkeeper murder
Top Gear can’t do the news in Chinglish! old bill bobbys investigating murder of shopkeeper who was attacked with hammer at male gender human bleing’s Huddersfield store arrest three more people. What the hell I mean??!!
Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
Newsy newsy: Pensioners robbed by armed men
You want boiled rice or fried rice with your Chinglish news? Three masked men armed with what is thought to having been crowbar rob two elderly women at their home in south Belfast.
Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com
Bmw 1-series Lease delivered to David Hodgson in Darlington
Visit my full letters page click here
Many customer letters contain really funny stuff. It’s unusual to receive a very dry one. However, I publish them all. Here is a letter from David Hodgson. It was sent to me quite a while ago!
David says…THE BEST: Premier League Class. At Darlington FC we get car offers 24/7 [...]
Making the Toyota IQ greener
Don’t spend so much on fuel! If you get a new Toyota IQ Petrol 1.0 VVT-i (68bhp) Hatchback 3dr 996cc Manual, then you will spend less because the CO2 value has changed. That means more MPG.
At the end of the contract, the car is collected from you and you have no further obligations. [...]
News JABBER: Maple madness
News Chinglified from Ling: Will 2012 Olympics whip Britain into patriotic fervour?
50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!
News NIPPLE: Live text – F1 testing
James May loves to read the news in Chinglish: Lewis Hamilton, lah, Michael Schumacher and Rubens BarricNi hao! Ni hao! all in action on final day of pre-season testing in Barcelona.
Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com
Gimme news bleat: Marie Osmond’s teenage son dies
Latest story in Chinglish, folks: The 18-earth-years old happy birthday to you, son of American singer Marie Osmond, lah, has died, lah, spokesman for family has said.
Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
NEWS ACCIDENT: Live – Sunday football
Why bother with English or Chinese when you can have your news in Chinglish: Tottenham host Everton in Sunday’s early game ahead of Carling Cup final and two other Premier League games.
Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
Newsy TRICKLE: For sale – country property to protect against nuclear attack
Top Gear can’t do the news in Chinglish! A nuclear bunker and surrounding land in Derbyshire is expected to fetch up to RMB Yuan #25,000 in eBay auction.
Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News GOBBLE: Live text – Rangers v Celtic
Chinglish news from the Chinese car leasing expert, Ling! Rangers take on Celtic in crunch match at Ibrox in Scotch tight ethnic human bliengs Premier League, lah, with defeat for visitors likely to end their title hopes. Eating rice!!
Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!
Chinglish NEWS: Two die following property fire
Chinglish = English and Chinese! Easy, eh? A man and woman die after house fire in Rugby, lah, Warwickshire, lah, sparking house-to-house inquiries by police.
Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!
News from Ling: Chile counts cost as tsunami ebbs
Latest news in Chinglish: Chile begins to count cost of its deadly 8.8 magnitude earthquake as fears of devastating Pacific tsunami ease.
Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!
Nissan Qashqai Lease delivered to Peter O’Sullivan in Bacup
Visit my full letters page click here
Many customer letters contain really funny stuff. It’s unusual to receive a very dry one. However, I publish them all. Here is a letter from Peter O’Sullivan. It was sent to me quite a while ago!
Peter says…“The hassle free way to lease a car”
After seeing Ling on Dragons’ Den, [...]
Publishing new polluting info for the Toyota IQ
Everyone moans that things go up and up and up. Well, the CO2 on the Toyota IQ 1.0 VVT-i (68bhp) Hatchback 3dr 996cc Petrol Manual has just come down! What a result! This post is to let you know.
You run this new car for 12, 18, 24 or 36 months depending on the [...]
Greetings from Ling: Hit squad trail
Gotta laugh at this news – in Chinglish! Piecing together alleged Dubai assassination
Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com
Big porky news: O’Neill v Ferguson
Can you understand Chinglish news? Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation experts assess Carling Cup final
50 more news headlines at LINGsCARS website!
News stoly: Live – Bangladesh v Province of Engrish running-dogs
Why bother with English or Chinese when you can have your news in Chinglish: Province of Engrish running-dogs look to restrict Bangladesh in first one-day international after fine century from Tamim Iqbal.
Tons of latest News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News MEOW: Key Eta leader ‘held in France’
Chinglify your news updates: One of top leaders of Basque separatist group Eta is arrested in northern France, lah, Spain’s interior ministry says.
Read all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS!
News bleat: Resist Tory ‘disaster’, lah, says Hain
Here’s some Chinglish news: Peter Hain will tell Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs Labour conference that Conservatives would bring change only “for worse”.
Click here: News headlines to read more! LINGCARS!
News from Ling: ‘Blind panic’
Chinglish news event: Last remlaining few white ethnic Britons tell of ‘praying in dark’ as Chile quake hit
Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com
Tell me the news, Ling: old bill bobbys ‘in Jerusalem holy site’
News from the local takeaway in Chinglish: Israeli old bill bobbys move to disperse Palestinian protesters throwing stones at Jerusalem holy site, lah, officials say.
Grab more News headlines from LINGsCARS!
News CHEW: Petrol bombs thrown at police
Why bother with English or Chinese when you can have your news in Chinglish: A number of petrol bombs thrown at old bill bobbys vehicling driving car machines during trouble in Dunmurry, lah, on outskirts of Belfast.
Grab all the latest news headlines at LINGsCARS.com
News BELLOW: Terry will not lead Province of Engrish running-dogs under Capello
Ling’s news in Chinglish! Province of Engrish running-dogs coach Fabio Capello says John Terry will not regain captaincy while bloody man is in charge of team.
Voted Worlds Worst Website! News headlines at LINGsCARS.com
Recent Posts
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- Nissan Qashqai Leasing Cheap £287.86 inc VAT
- Nissan Qashqai Leasing Cheap £279.64 inc VAT
- Nissan Qashqai Leasing Cheap £272.59 inc VAT
- Nissan Qashqai Leasing Cheap £262.01 inc VAT
- Nissan Qashqai Leasing Cheap £240.86 inc VAT
- News PUNISH: Fines threat over tram deadline
- Blakeing news: Forensic role for hand bacteria
- Citroen Xsara Picasso Lease delivered to Peter Boyes in Driffield
- Comparative label for the Toyota IQ
- News inhale: old bill bobbys quizzed over abuse deaths
- Renault Grand Scenic Leasing Cheap £252.61 inc VAT
- Citroen C-crosser Lease delivered to Stephen Kealey in Cheshire
- News hoover: Omagh bomb new inquiry call
- Lower CO2 on my Toyota IQ
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About
I am Ling Valentine as seen on Dragons' Den I lease cheap cars in the UK!. Have a look at my Cheap car leasing website
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MINI BLOG |
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NO FM CAR RADIO IN 2015
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Posted: 04/03/10
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Listening to the radio in our cars is something we all take for granted. Every car these days comes with a good quality radio, and... READ MORE
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I am GAY ICON! WoW!
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Posted: 04/02/10
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How amazing! I have my first Civil Partnership couple, both applying a car EACH! That was two weeks ago; the sensible one has alre... READ MORE
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 I am the Viz UK business ambassador! Post me Ferrero-Rochers! Yum Yum! |
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Every brand new car has breakdown cover. This means no roadside repair bills for your contract hire car! | |
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Complete a proposal form here. Fill in the details online or paper, with no commitment, and your new car is one step closer! | |
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| Audi S4 & a dog! | ||
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Funny car leasing TV ads! |
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Every brand new car has breakdown cover. This means no roadside repair bills for your contract hire car! | |
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Are you a complete mentalist? ...get a Can Am Spyder! Ferrari eater! 0-60 in 4 secs Can Am Quads too! Would suit my customers! LUNATIC FUN! - Ling |
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 £12,929 OTR visit Spyder site 3-wheels, 1000cc V-Twin, 4 brains |
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 PLAY BOTTOM TRUMPS! |
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JUST FOR FUN! I research and publish a full Chinese Car Guide. Full facts and figures! Interesting reading. Hope you enjoy! - Ling |
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LINGsCARS is the ONLY new car supplier to display and promote environmental info for ALL new cars, on the web! - Ling |
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Q: "Name kind and benign world leader who invented Lada car?" A: Comrade Joe! Try my new quiz - click here. It's not easy! - Ling | |
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| FIAT Panda baby! | ||
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Funny car leasing TV ads! |
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PLAY BOTTOM TRUMPS! |
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Complete a proposal form here. Fill in the details online or paper, with no commitment, and your new car is one step closer! | |
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Are you a complete mentalist? ...get a Can Am Spyder! Ferrari eater! 0-60 in 4 secs Can Am Quads too! Would suit my customers! LUNATIC FUN! - Ling |
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£12,929 OTR visit Spyder site 3-wheels, 1000cc V-Twin, 4 brains |
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All my contract hire cars come with the FULL manufacturer's warranty. So you'll have no repair bills! | |
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GORDON BROWN'S FUEL COST! See how much you spend on fuel while you rent a car from me. Every car listed! No one else shows you this! -Ling | |
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| Audi S4 & a dog! | ||
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Funny car leasing TV ads! |
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Read my customer letters! Click on your own NAME and read letters from customers called the same name ...hehe! | |
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GORDON BROWN'S FUEL COST! See how much you spend on fuel while you rent a car from me. Every car listed! No one else shows you this! -Ling | |
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| Mercedes GL Class! | ||
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Funny car leasing TV ads! |
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 Get my latest EMAIL car updates! |
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Compare the daily cost of your prospective car to a packet of cigs. Easily work out the REAL cost of your new contract hire car! COOL! | |
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...get a FREE BADGE! Collectors item - FREE! APPLY NOW! |
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| Rude Radio! | ||
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Funny car leasing TV ads! |
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| So many customers recommend so I pass on details of this cheap contract hire car insurance company... for all visitors! - Ling | ||
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Compare the daily cost of your prospective car to a packet of cigs. Easily work out the REAL cost of your new contract hire car! COOL! | |
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| Citroen 2CV dance! | ||
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Funny car leasing TV ads! |
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JUST FOR FUN! I research and publish a full Chinese Car Guide. Full facts and figures! Interesting reading. Hope you enjoy! - Ling |
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| Rude Radio! | ||
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Funny car leasing TV ads! |
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 | Crash tests! I take the trouble to show every crash test for my new cars, in the interests of customer health and safety! Click HERE - Ling |
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| FIAT Panda baby! | ||
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Funny car leasing TV ads! |
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Compare the daily cost of your prospective car to a packet of cigs. Easily work out the REAL cost of your new contract hire car! COOL! | |
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Every car gets FULL road tax for the whole contract term. This saves you up to £165 per year, or £495 on a 3-year contract! | |
