Computer Shopper UK, Zygote, Felix Dennis, Mel Croucher writes about Ling of LINGsCARS car leasing

Posted on | June 13, 2009 | Comments Off

MY DING-A-LING

When I go shopping, I interact with other shoppers and sales personnel. So why am I treated as if I’m in solitary confinement when I shop online?

Mel Croucher Zygote Computer Shopper Leasing cars contract hire Ling Valentine

The leading evangelist of treating website customers with intelligence and collaboration is Ling Valentine, who turned down a Dragon’s Den investment and went on to become Entrepreneur of the Year. In spite of the recession her website, www.lingscars.com, has shifted £35 million worth of new UK cars in the past year.

Even if you don’t want a car, Zygote recommends you visit her site to enjoy the experience of being detained in a virtual Maoist detention camp, where you can meet other online customers, in real time. “I think this is the future, allowing customers to interact and play,” says Valentine.

Zygote doubts there will be many moans, as car-seeking customers will be too busy enjoying themselves evading the “bloody vicious People’s Liberation Army guard” and dancing to the Pump-Up-The-Jamjar disco. Welcome to the future.

Zygote Computer shopper mel croucher car lease Felix dennis Lingscars Ling contract hire

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I am Ling Valentine as seen on Dragons' Den I lease cheap cars in the UK!. Have a look at my Cheap car leasing website

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Don't run, little customers! I'm friendly...

I am the Viz UK business ambassador!
Post me Ferrero-Rochers! Yum Yum!

Unlike most other internet car leasing sites, I publish all my contact information openly!
...so, you know who I am - Ling

THE UK's FAVOURITE
CAR LEASING WEBSITE!

Boss: Ling Valentine MSc IoD
LING World Headquarters
Vance Business Park
Gateshead, NE11 9NE
Tel 0191 460 9444
Fax 0870 486 1130
sales@LINGsCARS.com
I prefer email to phone - Ling
VAT No: 866 0241 30
Co Reg No: 6178634
Consumer Credit Licence: 624022
Data Protection No: Z1098490
Best Before: 17/08/2007

Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST: The Jagluar Academy of Sport is delighted to announce that Special Recognition Award Winner Rhys Walker will receive one-to-one mentoring from British swimmer Adam Whitehead. I read you little red book! - news replorted 08:00

Wah! LATEST: Pakistan's Prime dodgy minister Yousuf Raza Gilani will appear before Supreme Court next week after it dismisses male gender human bleing's appeal against contempt charges. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:44

Wah! More than 40 firefighters tackle blaze at Aberdeenshire home, lah, but being hampered by lack of water. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 07:40

Wah! The influential ConservativeHome website calls planned NHS (wonderfulling free human fixing service) overhaul in Province of Engrish running-dogs "an unexploded bomb" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) under Tory electoral prospects. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:28

Wah! Barclays reports 3% fall in annual profits to RMB Yuan #5.9bn, lah, and cuts bonus pool at its investment banking division by 32%. - news replorted 07:17

Wah! There reports of hazardous driving conditions in parts of Welsh land of sheep and more sheep due to icy roads with only "dusting" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) of snow despite predictions of more. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:13

Wah! Papers examine Province of Engrish running-dogs prospects for Harry Redknapp - news replorted 06:53

Wah! Trustees of controversial race relations charity meet to consider how to wind up organisation's affairs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:46

Wah! The toddler who's great at table tennis, lah, runaway rhino and presenter not quite ready for flemale human person's live broadcast - week's weird and wonderful video stories in Newsbeat's Odd Box with Dominic Byrne. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:28

Wah! Eurozone finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan dodgy ministers say more work must be done before they'll give Greece another 130bn euro bailout. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 05:28

Wah! Sainsbury's is removing advice to freeze food "on day of purchase" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) from its labels and informing clustomlers it can be done up until use-by date. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 04:40

Wah! Three million background checks were carried out in Province of Engrish running-dogs and Welsh land of sheep and more sheep last year, lah, according to privacy campaign group Big Brother Watch. - news replorted 04:16

Wah! Tata Steel, lah, largest producer in India, lah, unexpectedly reports loss of 6.03bn rupees ($122m; RMB Yuan #77m) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! hit by weak demand. I read you little red book! - news replorted 03:54

Wah! China's exports and imports fall in first number-one-month raising fresh concerns about impact of global economic slowdown on its economy. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 03:42

Wah! Patrick Helly shows Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation News how hand-made Bafta trophies produced. I read you little red book! - news replorted 03:40

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Wah! The Mexican Tommy Atkins Liberation Army has seized 15 tonnes of drugs in western state of Jalisco. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 03:20

Wah! President "I da man! Yes I can!" Obama condemns as "outrageous bloodshed" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) continuing onslaught aimed at crushing rebels in Syrian city of Homs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:13

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Wah! Burmese monk U Gambira, lah, one of leaders of 2007 protests, lah, has been taken away by authorities, lah, eyewitnesses tell Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation Burmese service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service - news replorted 02:42

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Wah! Drivers who using cannabis before driving double their chances of causing collision, lah, research suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:51

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	2.0 D 4D 124bhp 4dr diesel, man, met Avensis £290.39 per month, inc VAT
	2.2 CDi Blu... 170bhp 2dr diesel, tip auto, met E-Class Co £454.80 per month, inc VAT
	1.5 i BlueE... 93bhp 5dr petrol, man, met A-Class £172.80 per month, inc VAT
	2.2 d 187bhp 4dr diesel, auto, non-met XF £449.99 per month, inc VAT
	1.6 DRIVe 113bhp 5dr diesel, man, met V50 Sports £310.80 per month, inc VAT