My 350th Customer Letter! A Milestone!!!

“Great deals, Ling is competitive and gives fabulous customer service. I’ll always talk to Ling first for a leasing deal.” Adam Foley-Comer 15 Brookland Close London NW11 6DJ Editor Note: Adam! You are my 350th letter writer! Thanks! Hope you have a great summer in your new Mazda MX-5 – Ling

Chinese Take-Aways to sell MG Sportscar – SCOOP

Due to reasons of cost it has apparently been decided that the new Chinese MG will NOT be sold via traditional car dealer networks in the UK, reports the Shanghai Morning Star. Instead, Nanjing chief, Yu Jianwei said: “We are committed to re-building the marque in major markets, with cars supplied from the UK or [...]

Ka-Bam! Customer Letter 349 Flying In

“Ling made my first experience at leasing a car simple and straightforward, handling everything from finance to delivery so efficiently. The time between finance being agreed and taking delivery of my car took longer than expected, but I am delighted with my new Mazda 6. The dealer was excellent with a helpful and friendly delivery [...]

New BMW 3-Series Saloon, £298.96+VAT

I have just uploaded a new BMW 3-Series Saloon deal to my website! I added New BMW 3-Series Saloon 318i 2.0 ES Saloon 4dr 1995cc Petrol, with Automatic gearbox and Non-metallic paint. It is on a 3+23 monthly profile. Only £298.96+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 23 payments on direct debit. [...]

Customer Letter 348 from PDR of Wales!

“A pleasurable and smooth experience from start to finish. Excellent dealer. The personal approach is hard to find these days, but is guaranteed with Ling. Highly recommended, will definitely use in the future.” Wayne Towell 35 Garth View Hillside Park Bedwas CF83 8EW Editor Note: Wayne, you have very nice summer to enjoy your new [...]

BEST Magazine: LINGsCARS meets 1,200,000 readers

With a monthly sales figure of 400,000 and a readership of 1.2m, Best Magazine wanted to find out from me what women find most irritating about car dealers. So I told them. My webpage visitors have gone through the roof, so “HELLO” to all BEST readers! It is very pleasant to have more women customers, [...]

Ta-Daaa! 347th Letter From Crazy Customer Drops In

“Ling, the new VW Transporter van is lovely. The dealer was helpful and I’m happy. You, on the other hand, are quite bonkers (WHAAAAAAT? – Ling) and I love you for it (ummm, OK… – Ling)! We WILL be having another van from you soon. You were helpful and mad; my kinda woman! Carry on [...]

My Dinky Toy Routemaster is Nearly Ready

Wah! It looks like a Dinky toy, but it is really real! My 1966 London bus is getting the final coat of bright red paint and it’s looking brilliant! They think it is (red) all over; it nearly is, now! It is a while now since I completed my last project, the LINGsCARS Nuclear Missile [...]

Pull My Truck! Twice.

Pay attention old people of Britain! Because, in China, a 72-year-old grandmother has pulled a four tonne truck, loaded with people, with her teeth. Wang Xiaobei, from the Shandong province, managed to drag the truck for more than 10 metres. Wang, a senior accountant, said her good health and high spirits were down to more [...]

The Bishop, the Donkey and the Devil

Chinese online car-sales website owner, Ling Valentine, 33, has hit back at Church of England Bishop Richard Chartres who suggested that “buying a large car is a symptom of sin”. Bishop Chartres, who has helped form the Church of England’s policy on the environment, said there was now an “overriding imperative” to “walk more lightly [...]

Letter 346 zooms in to my postbox…

“Most impressed with all aspects of dealing with you. Fun website – and very clear. I really appreciated the fact that you always pick up the phone at once (I can never get through to some companies) and you are really helpful and friendly. The Nissan Note is great, the dealer was excellent and I’m [...]

The Best Food x Foolishness x Far

Land Rover is really gunning for posh nobs with it’s latest hamper of food. Acclaimed chef and restaurateur, Marco Pierre White, and Land Rover are proud to announce the launch of a strictly limited edition picnic hamper, available from June 26. The contents of this luxury hamper, priced at £199 have been been selected by [...]

Customer Letter No.345 Drops in by Email

“Just a short note – my new Mazda RX8 turned up on schedule – I am very pleased with the car and your impeccable service and will be using you again when my current contracts expire. Whilst I don’t like spending money on cars, you make it as painless as possible with your helpful and [...]

Hmmm, New Chrysler

CHRYSLER has chosen this week’s British Motor Show for the world premier of its new Sebring saloon model, even though it will not reach UK showrooms until early next year. Chrysler says that the Sebring will boast several novelty features such as a heated/cooled front cup-holder for hot and cold drinks. What can I say? Chrysler says [...]

New SAAB 9-3 Sportwagon, £289.99+VAT

I have just uploaded a new SAAB 9-3 Sportwagon deal to my website! I added New SAAB 9-3 Sportwagon 1.9 TiD (150bhp) Vector Sport Sportwagon Estate 5dr 1910cc Diesel, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+35 monthly profile. Only £289.99+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 35 payments [...]

New SAAB 9-3 Sport Saloon, £284.99+VAT

I have just uploaded a new SAAB 9-3 Sport Saloon deal to my website! I added New SAAB 9-3 Sport Saloon 1.9TiD (150bhp) Vector Sport (Leather) Saloon 4dr 1910cc Diesel, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+35 monthly profile. Only £284.99+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 35 [...]

New Vauxhall Corsa, £124.99+VAT

I have just uploaded a new Vauxhall Corsa deal to my website! I added New Vauxhall Corsa 1.2 (80bhp) SXi + Hatchback 3dr 1229cc Petrol, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+35 monthly profile. Only £124.99+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 35 payments on direct debit. Private [...]

Million Stupid Motor Dealers.com

I was using Glass’s Guide and I came across a full page advert encouraging motor dealers to advertise on the MillionDollarMotorPage.co.uk. This is a rip-off of Alex Tew’s MillionDollar HomePage, which raised $1m for the enterprising British student from Swindon, to pay (!) for his uni fees. I took some space on that page, because [...]

344th Customer Letter Arrives in Post

“Ling is unique – I’ve been selling for 30+ years, but her marketing and sales approach rates as amongst the best I’ve ever seen. This is (as importantly) backed up by fast, accurate and helpful responses to pricing, queries and completion arrangements. Fast, competitive, helpful – why go elsewhere? I had no complaints and excellent [...]

New SAAB 9-3 Convertible, £329.99+VAT

I have just uploaded a new SAAB 9-3 Convertible deal to my website! I added New SAAB 9-3 Convertible 1.8t (150bhp) Vector Convertible 2dr 1988cc Petrol, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+35 monthly profile. Only £329.99+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 35 payments on direct debit. [...]

New SAAB 9-3 Convertible, £314.99+VAT

I have just uploaded a new SAAB 9-3 Convertible deal to my website! I added New SAAB 9-3 Convertible 1.9 TiD (150bhp) Linear Convertible 2dr 1910cc Diesel, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+35 monthly profile. Only £314.99+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 35 payments on direct [...]

New SAAB 9-3 Convertible, £294.99+VAT

I have just uploaded a new SAAB 9-3 Convertible deal to my website! I added New SAAB 9-3 Convertible 1.8t (150bhp) Linear Convertible 2dr 1988cc Petrol, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+35 monthly profile. Only £294.99+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 35 payments on direct debit. [...]

Issa Da Same Alfa Problems in South Africa, Boss.

This is an excerpt from a South African newspaper, today, The Mail and Guardian. “It’s for this reason that I found the start of the press presentation of the new Alfa 159 so refreshing. Alfa executives chose to focus on the poor infrastructure they had in South Africa while showing us how they had been [...]

Beautiful Poem Sent By Welsh Ethnic Customer

“If you want nice car from Ms Ling, All you got to do is give her a ring, All her cars in perfect working order They have just been smuggled over the Chinese border. You rent a car you get a free polo, Not the Volkswagen one you silly fellow, Her prices are great and [...]

Customer Letter Number 343 Arrives by Fax! (Remember Faxes?)

“We have now converted all our cars to cars on lease – this latest one is a SAAB 9-3 Sportwagon – and all through Ling! Her service is excellent and she really tries to find the car we are looking for. Ling’s website always has the best prices and it’s the most fun, and her [...]

New Mazda 3, £172.42+VAT

I have just uploaded a new Mazda 3 deal to my website! I added New Mazda 3 1.6 TS Hatchback 5dr 1598cc Petrol, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+35 monthly profile. Only £172.42+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 35 payments on direct debit. Private customers, make [...]

LINGsCARS Mongol Rally Entry

Hey, hey, hey! My lads (James and Andy) are setting off on 22nd of July to Ulan Bator (Mongolia you dimwit), on the 2006 Mongol Rally. James Rickwood-Dodsworth, 19, Ryton and Andy Wallace, 19, of Gosforth set off on July 22 from London and will take in Kazakhstan and Uzbekistan in the Mongol Rally. In [...]

New Honda CR-V, £209.99+VAT

NOTE: THIS IS SERIOUSLY DAMN CHEAP 4X4 CAR! I have just uploaded a new Honda CR-V deal to my website! I added New Honda CR-V 2.2 i-CTDi SE Station Wagon 5dr 2204cc Diesel, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+11 monthly profile. Only £209.99+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, [...]

New Volkswagen Golf, £288.08+VAT

I have just uploaded a new Volkswagen Golf deal to my website! I added New Volkswagen Golf 2.0 TDI GT Hatchback 5dr 1968cc Diesel, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+23 monthly profile. Only £288.08+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 23 payments on direct debit. Private customers, [...]

Fuel Prices Mean Changing Your Car Gets Cheaper

According to Reuters news agency this morning, UK petrol and diesel prices are getting to their highest levels -ever: Reuters say : “The average price for premium unleaded petrol at UK service stations reached a new high of 97.31 pence a litre. The pump price for diesel hit 98.93 pence a litre, very close to [...]

OH! It Gets Worse

Today I opened my issue of CAR magazine, and it came with a free CD from Renault. Wow! Huh? Yes. Stunningly crap. You know, they have made a Flash movie. About the Clio. Still pretending it is half French and half British. Just hope the electrical bits aren’t French. The movie isn’t any good. Very [...]

Targeting People Who Cannot Afford It

From time to time, I receive emails like this one I received today (below). What they are trying to get from me are the names and proposal details of customers who have been declined for contract hire. To pass finance checks and get one of my cars you have got to be a reasonably good [...]

New BMW 1-Series Cabrio Coming Soon

Hey, I’ve just seen a picture of the new BMW 1-Series Cabrio which looks MUCH BETTER than the hatchback. As the normal 5dr BMW 1-Series has no legroom in the back, the change to a cabrio won’t hurt it that much, eh? Waiting, anticipating. If the price is sub-£250/mth, I will sell LOADS of these. [...]

Groaning Email Box

Right. I’m a heavy email user. I send over 200 per day, to customers and suppliers. I receive over 300 a day, from customers, suppliers and from f**kwits! Stop sending me chemist-shop stuff!

Really Annoying Car Manufacturers

I am sick of reading about “Fiesta” or “Punto” or “Vectra“. Are these car manufacturers illiterate? Even me, being a bloody Chinese, knows that there should be a THE in front of a car name. It’s as if these cars are people! They’re not. They are just cars, so when they sentences like “New Punto [...]

Crush My (Peugeot) 307.co.uk

Well, the guy with the Peugeot 307 that was so bad he decided to crush it, is getting lots of publicity. Owner Mark Fell-Crook from Prestatyn, Denbighshire says he’s had loads of trouble from it since buying it in 2002 even though it’s only got 30,000 miles under its wheels. So, inspired by an event [...]

WEB ACTIVE Magazine Article: UK Vendors Attack Email Charges

Here’s the text of the article: “Vendors say AOL and Yahoo ‘will make money letting rubbish through’ at the expense of legitimate emails A move by service providers AOL and Yahoo to charge companies for delivering promotional emails has been attacked by some UK online vendors. The charge will allow messages to bypass the service [...]

Customer Letter No. 342 arrives!

“Excellent service, very professional company. Highly recommended. Honda CRV delivered on time, as advised.” Wac Jokhia address withheld Derby DE73 *** Editor Note: Have a great time in your new CRV, Wac!! – Ling

Do NOT Put One on Your Contract-Hire Car!

To add to my list of things you should not fit to your contract hire car, this is a FLAMETHROWER product from a bloody Australian website. Although it does look interesting… Especially as a contract hire car doesn’t actually belong to you. So if you blow the car up you could simply take off the [...]

BEST World Cup Movie! DA SHEEP!

World Cup is over, I know. But I have found THE BEST world cup movie made in Cumbria, using SHEEP. It is completely worth watching. Click on picture to visit site and play movie. Funny as HELL!

Have YOU been snapped by a Digital Speed Camera?

There are many anti-speed camera people out there. I am certainly not one of them. I certainly don’t endorse the lunatics and middle-class superior intellectuals of, for example Safe Speed. I think speed cameras have a definite role. But this morning I have been notified by the DSA of this webpage. Every infringement caught by [...]

New BMW 3-Series Saloon, £285+VAT

I have just uploaded a new BMW 3-Series Saloon deal to my website! I added New BMW 3-Series Saloon 320i 2.0 ES Saloon 4dr 1995cc Petrol, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+23 monthly profile. Only £285+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 23 payments on direct debit. [...]

New BMW 3-Series Saloon, £265+VAT

I have just uploaded a new BMW 3-Series Saloon deal to my website! I added New BMW 3-Series Saloon 318i 2.0 ES Saloon 4dr 1995cc Petrol, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+23 monthly profile. Only £265+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 23 payments on direct debit. [...]

New BMW 1-Series, £215+VAT

I have just uploaded a new BMW 1-Series deal to my website! I added New BMW 1-Series 118d 2.0TD ES Hatchback 5dr 1995cc Diesel, with Manual gearbox and Non-metallic paint. It is on a 3+23 monthly profile. Only £215+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 23 payments on direct debit. Private customers, [...]

New Volkswagen Passat, £264.52+VAT

I have just uploaded a new Volkswagen Passat deal to my website! I added New Volkswagen Passat 2.0 (140bhp) TDi S Saloon 6-speed 4dr 1968cc Diesel, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+23 monthly profile. Only £264.52+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 23 payments on direct debit. [...]

MEN! Save a Fortune on Your New Car!

Look what I’ve just come up with! Some of my male customers could save a fortune on their new car by simply buying these padded briefs, and renting a much smaller, less provocative car. Why waste money on a Porsche or Ferrari or even a Mazda RX-8? These padded briefs will give you all the [...]

New Ford Mondeo, £259.99+VAT

I have just uploaded a new Ford Mondeo deal to my website! I added New Ford Mondeo 2.0 TDCi (115bhp) LX Hatchback 5dr 1998cc Diesel, with Manual gearbox and Metallic paint. It is on a 3+11 monthly profile. Only £259.99+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 11 payments on direct debit. Private [...]

Really Useful Emergency Bike

The inventor Sir Clive Sinclair, who brought us the Sinclair C5, has launched another CRAZY THING: the A-Bike. Looking at press reaction, everyone seems to be missing a point. This little fold up bike is said to be uncomfortable and a bit unstable… but what a great bike to keep in your car boot! Stuck [...]

New Citroen C4 Coupe, £125+VAT

I have just uploaded a new Citroen C4 Coupe deal to my website! I added New Citroen C4 Coupe 1.4i 16v (90bhp) VT Coupe 3dr 1360cc Petrol, with Manual gearbox and Non-metallic paint. It is on a 3+23 monthly profile. Only £125+VAT per month with 3 months initial payment, followed by 23 payments on direct [...]

VW Still Cheapening Themselves with Jetta Ads

On the 2nd of July, I posted on here and on the CompanyCarDriver forum about VW cheapening themselves by comapring the VW Jetta (Golf with a boot) to a Vectra or an Avensis in their adverts (below). I thought their ads were disingenuous; They were pointing out how much cheaper a Jetta was, so I [...]

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I am Ling Valentine as seen on Dragons' Den I lease cheap cars in the UK!. Have a look at my Cheap car leasing website

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MINI BLOG

MY SISTER'S (CHINESE) SKODA!

Posted: 08/07/10

Comments ( 4 )

Although I only lease cars in the UK, my sister Shan asked me to help her buy a brand-new car in China!
She looked at quite a... READ MORE

HIDING VAT

Posted: 02/07/10

Comments ( 0 )

Can you believe prices you see on the web? I've gotta say, how annoyed it makes me that so many websites break the law, also known... READ MORE

THE 3 DEGREES - MY IT CROWD

Posted: 18/07/10

Comments ( 0 )

Just to say that Mark, Jamie and Jonny have graduated. Fantastic!
All have got FIRSTS in Computer something or other from Sun... READ MORE

WHY HYDROGEN NO GOOD 4 CARS

Posted: 15/12/10

Comments ( 1 )

I have a BSc in Applied Chemistry and an MSc in Environmental Management, so have some qualification to comment on this issue. Sor... READ MORE

CHEAPER THAN PENDRAGON

Posted: 02/08/10

Comments ( 0 )

I've just delivered a new car to a senior manager (for his personal use) in PENDRAGON PLC, the UK's largest dealer group. The grou... READ MORE

NO FM CAR RADIO IN 2015

Posted: 04/03/10

Comments ( 3 )

Listening to the radio in our cars is something we all take for granted. Every car these days comes with a good quality radio, and... READ MORE

Don't run, little customers! I'm friendly...

I am the Viz UK business ambassador!
Post me Ferrero-Rochers! Yum Yum!

Unlike most other internet car leasing sites, I publish all my contact information openly!
...so, you know who I am - Ling

THE UK's FAVOURITE
CAR LEASING WEBSITE!

Boss: Ling Valentine MSc IoD
LING World Headquarters
Vance Business Park
Gateshead, NE11 9NE
Tel 0191 460 9444
Fax 0870 486 1130
sales@LINGsCARS.com
I prefer email to phone - Ling
VAT No: 866 0241 30
Co Reg No: 6178634
Consumer Credit Licence: 624022
Data Protection No: Z1098490
Best Before: 17/08/2007

Latest BBC NEWS from LING in CHINGLISH!

Wah! LATEST: Royal capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity of ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land chief executive, lah, Stephen Hester, lah, says bloody man briefly considered resigning during uproar over male gender human bleing's bonus. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:39

Wah! LATEST: Three paintings from Elizabeth Taylor's personal art collection sold for almost RMB Yuan #14 million at auction in London. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 08:31

Wah! Syrian opposition groups say more than 40 human bliengs having been killed as bombardment of city of Homs continues. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:29

Wah! Vauxhall is to unveil brace of stunning new models and groundbreaking concept LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine at this year�s Geneva Show, lah, which opens to press on monthly number-three 6. - news replorted 08:00

Wah! Scientists in Great Satan having successfully made human brain cells in lab that exact replica of genetically caused Parkinson's disease. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:57

Wah! Pakistani PM Yousuf Raza Gilani files appeal against appearing before Supreme Court on contempt charges on 13 February. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:54

Wah! A new squad of 1,000 officers dedicated to tackling gang-related crime (shoud shoot them) in London (capital of Great England) is being launched by Metropolitan Police. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:46

Wah! A old bill bobbys woman's lost mobile phone containing hundreds of photographs and operational details falls into hands of dissident republicans. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:27

Wah! Employers added permanent jobs for first clock time result in four months in January, lah, says Recruitment and Employment Confederation. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 07:24

Wah! A 70-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man was struck dead by stolen LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine minutes after officers stopped chasing it, lah, old bill bobbys say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 07:18

Wah! An assembly member is to lead Senedd debate later in bid to introduce compulsory microchipping for dogs in Wales. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:04

Wah! Papers ponder health bill as it returns to Lords - news replorted 06:58

Wah! A council leader faces vote of no confidence after allegedly disparaging written-down messages on dead tree about staff and hospital protesters were posted on YouTube. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 06:57

Wah! A rock fall that released methane gas may having triggered deadly Pike River mine blast in New Zealand, lah, experts report. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 06:03

Wah! An SDLP delegation is to meet the bloody annoying Blitish dodgy minister for welfare reform in London (capital of Great England) later to discuss concerns about benefit changes for Northern Ireland. I read you little red book! - news replorted 05:57

Wah! A Great Satan court has ruled that ban on same-sex marriages in California is unconstitutional. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 05:49

Wah! Are eating challenges becoming more popular in Province of Engrish running-dogs? - news replorted 05:42

Wah! Syria's opposition dismisses assurances that President Assad is committed to ending violence sweeping country. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 05:27

Wah! A bloody annoying Blitish ticket-holder has won more than RMB Yuan #45m in Euromillions lottery, lah, operator Camelot reveals. Eating rice!! - news replorted 04:00

Wah! Time-lapse footage reveals how mushroom corals inflate and deflate to free themselves from smothering sand. I read you little red book! - news replorted 03:38

Wah! A study of hormones in whale faeces shows that right whales stressed by propeller noise from shipping. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 03:28

Wah! A missile attack by unmanned Great Satan drone aircraft in north-west Pakistan kills eight people, lah, Pakistani security officials say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 03:25

Wah! Crucial assembly elections begin in India's most populous state of Uttar Pradesh. - news replorted 03:12

Wah! The Department for Work and Pensions admits to large backlog of new sickness benefit claims, lah, as tens of thousands await decision beyond 13-week assessment period. I read you little red book! - news replorted 02:55

Wah! The government is set for difficult clock time result when House of Lords debates concessions to its plans to overhaul NHs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 02:46

Wah! South African old bill bobbys having charged man with fraud after bloody man claimed to be famous Zulu musician who had come back from dead. I read you little red book! - news replorted 02:36

Wah! MPs say spending cuts raise concerns over UK's ability to launch another mission on same scale as operation in Libya. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 02:23

Wah! Finance Secretary John Swinney looks set to offer last minute changes to male gender human bleing's budget in effort to secure opposition support. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 02:02

Wah! British actor Mackenzie Crook, I confusing myself again!! Taking too much bloody MSG, OK, OK, lah, best known for playing Gareth in Office, lah, is shortlisted for this year's Waterstones Children's Book Prize. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:51

Wah! Jamaica throws about 2,000 illegal firearms into furnace as part of programme to reduce gun trafficking and violent crime (shoud shoot them) on island. I read you little red book! - news replorted 01:46

Wah! Harry Potter star is spooked in new film Woman in Black - news replorted 01:38

Wah! Harry Potter star is spooked in Woman in Black - news replorted 01:37

Wah! The rise and fall of lap dancing club - news replorted 01:23

Wah! Profits for Walt Disney having risen I give you tellibly lovely custlingmer damn thanks of billion Chinesey human bliengs to rising popularity of its theme parks and earnings from its television channels. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:08

Wah! Older human bliengs needing social care let down by fragmented services - and Health and Social Care Bill will not simplify system - says group of MPs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:06

Wah! Mitt Romney battles rising Rick Santorum as voters in Great Satan three states pick Republican presidential nominee. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:59

Wah! The primate who solves memory test faster than blink - news replorted 00:46

Wah! How drones and satellites catching farming cheats - news replorted 00:43

Wah! Thousands of staff at O2 in Slough working remotely on Wednesday in experiment to see if any Olympic Games disruption would affect businesses. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:33

Wah! Katie Price has told Newsnight's Jeremy Paxman bloody woman thinks breast implants should having age limit of 21, lah, following health scare over implants manufactured by French firm PIp. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 00:09

Wah! Two more men arrested by old bill bobbys investigating murder of man in Lurgan at weekend. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:08


	3.0 CDI Blu... 254bhp 4dr diesel, auto, met S-Class £730.80 per month, inc VAT
	2.2 CDi Blu... 167bhp 4dr diesel, tip auto, met E-Class Sa £388.80 per month, inc VAT
	1.5 i BlueE... 93bhp 5dr petrol, man, met A-Class £172.80 per month, inc VAT
	2.1 CDi Blu... 201bhp 2dr diesel, tip auto, met SLK Roadst £310.16 per month, inc VAT
	1.6 i 115bhp 5dr petrol, man, non-met Juke £213.86 per month, inc VAT