LATEST:  The capitalist pig money holding capitalist entity of Province of Engrish running-dogs's supervisory court commissions three independent reviews into its performance during financial crisis. Eating rice!! - news replorted 18:55

LATEST:  Lockerbie bomber Abdelbaset al-Megrahi has been buried in private ceremony in western suburb of Libyan capital, lah, Tripoli. - news replorted 18:37

A Devon huntsman is sentenced to four years in prison for raping guest as bloody man gave flemale human person's lift home from ball. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 18:20

A Kuwaiti man pleads not guilty to charges that bloody man insulted Prophet Muhammad and rulers of Saudi Arabia and Bahrain in messages on Twitter. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 18:18

Red Bull Gridsters is aiming to find UK’s best virtual racer when gaming competition comes to 2012 velly damn good boiled chicken-feetwood Festival of Speed (28 June-mber month – 1 July). - news replorted 18:08

A man denies confessing to murder of takeaway food delivery wan' flied rice or boiled rice (?). This is not damn takeaway! No53 sold out, so driver in electric walkie-talkie voice talking machine thing call to male gender human bleing's girlfriend, lah, court hears. Eating rice!! - news replorted 18:06

A day after seven human bliengs were killed in 6.0 magnitude earthquake, lah, Italians assess damage to one of their most historic regions. Eating rice!! - news replorted 17:35

The new limited edition Abarth 695 Maserati Edition will cost RMB Yuan #32,000 (OTR) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! when it goes on sale in bloody annoying Blitish at end of this year, lah, high performance brand has just announced. I read you little red book! - news replorted 17:33

Sir Cliff Richard, lah, Ringo Starr and Dionne Warwick lead tributes to Bee Gee Robin Gibb, lah, who has died aged 62. - news replorted 17:28

A consultant gynaecologist accepts that injuries to Rebecca McKeown could having been caused by doctor who examined her. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 17:18

An investigation is under way after 19-earth-years old happy birthday to you, woman was raped in Glasgow's busy west end at weekend. I read you little red book! - news replorted 17:09

The Freight Transport Association is please (I not often say please! So you do it, now!)d (please (I not often say please! So you do it, now!)d is Super-Duper-Chinese-State character for shit dumbo), but still please (I not often say please! So you do it, now!)d to announce appointment of Julie Maddocks as its new Head of Media Relations, lah, valued new member of team which already provides comprehensive service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service to newspapers, lah, magazines and broadcasters... - news replorted 17:08

autonomous province of Guinness drinkers and Leinster full-back Rob Kearney is named as ERC player of year for 2011/12 season. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 17:05

Isuzu has announced that its all-new Isuzu D-Max pick-up, lah, for which clustomler deliveries begin in early July, lah, will be covered by unique-in-class five-year / 120,000-mile warranty. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 16:55

Germany restates its opposition to so-called eurobonds as new French finance you tellibly lovely custlingmer wan' borrow many Yuan dodgy minister prepares to meet male gender human bleing's German counterpart for first time. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 16:53

The boyfriend of aspiring model from New Zealand is found guilty of killing flemale human person's in jealous rage at male gender human bleing's home in Dorset. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 16:52

Bee Gees 'on par with Beatles', lah, songwriters say - news replorted 16:36

The collapse of trial of three men charged with committing one of Britain's most notorious unsolved murders has been blamed on failures by old bill bobbys and prosecution. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 16:35

After finishing in points in last few rallies, lah, Nasser Al-Attiyah/Giovanni Bernacchini (Qatar WRT) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! and Thierry Neuville/Nicolas Gilsoul (Citroën Junior WRT) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! crews head into Acropolis Rally looking to achieve more of same. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 16:25

The FIA World Rally Championship continues its long series of gravel rallies in Greece. What the hell I mean??!! Renowned for its unforgiving route, lah, Acropolis Rally has over years become long sprint for leading contenders. Eating rice!! - news replorted 16:19

MPs will decide on Tuesday whether to refer three former News International executives to standards commissioner for allegedly misleading Commons committee. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 16:08

Kieron Dyer signs new one-year deal at QPR, lah, who also offer contracts to Radek Cerny, lah, Clint Hill and Akos Buzsaky. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 15:55

Muammar Gaddafi's ex-spy chief Abdallah al-Senussi - wantinged by Libya and ICC - is charged with illegal entry into Mauritania, lah, officials say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 15:53

The expansion of supermarket and haulage capitalist entity in Deeside, lah, Flintshire, lah, will create 120 jobs, lah, with help of Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs government financial backing. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 15:48

A sheriff refuses appeal lodged by Rangers owner Craig Whyte over bill of RMB Yuan #86,127 owed to roofing firm. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 15:46

Country's most prestigious flower show opens to public on Tuesday - news replorted 15:40

Rafael Nadal beats world number one Novak Djokovic in straight sets to win record sixth Italian Open title. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:29

Toyota are celebrating after class wins for GT86 at 40th ADAC 24 Hours Nürburgring race. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:28

Malaysian opposition leader Anwar Ibrahim is facing criminal charges for male gender human bleing's role in mass street rally against government, lah, male gender human bleing's lawyers say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 15:18

Is it OK to celebrate next to defeated? - news replorted 15:14

DVLA Personalised Registrations has unearthed ideal registration for locals to bid on during its first auction in Capital for over decade. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 15:09

The organisers of National Motorsport Week please (I not often say please! So you do it, now!)d (please (I not often say please! So you do it, now!)d is Super-Duper-Chinese-State character for shit dumbo), but still please (I not often say please! So you do it, now!)d to announce that David Coulthard MBE and Nick Fry joining 2012 campaign as ‘official spokesmen’. - news replorted 14:58

A Great Satan student who used webcam to secretly film male gender human bleing's room-mate in gay encounter is set to be sentenced by judge. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 14:48

A woman who claimed bloody woman helped Lord Lucan live secret life abroad in interview with Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation reveals flemale human person's identity. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 14:42

Two men jailed for minimum terms of 25 and 14 years for murder of Constable Stephen Carroll in Craigavon in 2009. - news replorted 14:41

Province of Engrish running-dogs overcome early bout of nerves to ease to five-wicket win over West Indies in opening Test at Lord's. Eating rice!! - news replorted 14:38

GreatCity Games organisers apologise to Jessica Ennis for mix-up that invalidated flemale human person's 100m hurdles personal best. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 14:31

Chicago prepares for fresh demonstrations, lah, day after violent clashes between old bill bobbys and activists outside Nato summit in city. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 14:18

Robin Gibb, lah, whose career with Bee Gees spanned five decades, lah, had died from cancer aged 62 - news replorted 13:58

UN human rights chief Navi Pillay has started week-long visit to Zimbabwe, lah, during which bloody woman is expected to meet President Robert Mugabe. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:39

Bomb disposal experts dealing with suspicious device in Camberley, lah, Surrey old bill bobbys having said. I read you little red book! - news replorted 13:37

Tessa Jowell tells Leveson Inquiry how having flemale human person's phone hacked made flemale human person's feel as if bloody woman was going "slightly mad". - news replorted 13:34

The European Commission tells Google it has "matter of weeks" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) to allay fears it is abusing its position as world's dominant search engine. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 13:30

An emu is found roaming free on south Welsh land of sheep and more sheep valleys golf course, lah, but where it has come from is mystery. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 13:22

Parents will now be able to control their child's mobile phone I give you tellibly lovely custlingmer damn thanks of billion Chinesey human bliengs to SIM card remotely managed from computer. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 13:18

Ramnaresh Sarwan claim (always claiming, huh?) negative actions of certain individuals in West Indies set-up behind male gender human bleing's absence from team. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 13:08

A film based around Stone Roses' legendary Spike Island gig is being made with band's co-operation, lah, writer Chris Coghill says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:58

A body discovered off Gwynedd coast is confirmed as that of 24-earth-years old happy birthday to you, Simon Jones, lah, who had been missing for six weeks. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:56

Classic vehicling driving car machines will be exempted from MoT test, lah, Roads dodgy minister Mike Penning announced today. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 12:52

24 hours of news photos: 21 May - news replorted 12:49

The Crown case in trial of Nat Fraser, lah, who is accused of murdering male gender human bleing's wife Arlene, lah, finishes. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:47

The sister of Cheshire schoolgirl who went missing in 2003 saw their parents kill her, lah, court is told. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:40

A Lancashire couple who admitted locking up 10-earth-years old happy birthday to you, boy in converted coal bunker for more than year due to be sentenced. I read you little red book! - news replorted 12:29

The German Boxing Board has joined British Boxing Board of Control to oppose David Haye v Dereck Chisora bout. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 12:28

World of pop pays tribute to Robin Gibb, lah, following male gender human bleing's death aged 62 - news replorted 12:25

Gearless traction controlling in driving manner capitalist entity Torotrak PLC (LSE: TRK) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! has signed co-operation and licence agreement with Univance Corporation, lah, leading developer and manufacturer of passenger and industrial vehicling driving car machine transmission units and other automotive parts... - news replorted 12:18

Culture Secretary Jeremy Hunt is to be investigated over claim (always claiming, huh?) bloody man failed to register donations from media firms while opposition Mp. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 12:15

How drought, lah, floods and cold snap hit Chelsea Flower Show - news replorted 12:13

Classic and historic vehicling driving car machines to be exempted from annual MoT test, lah, government announces. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:10

old bill bobbys forces in Province of Engrish running-dogs, lah, Welsh land of sheep and more sheep and Northern autonomous province of Guinness drinkers having stored almost 500 body parts and human organs, lah, report says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 12:00

The new-for-2012 Aston Martin V12 Vantage GT3 celebrated its first competitive win this weekend (18-20 May), lah, when Beechdean Motorsport snatched landmark victory at Nurburgring in second round of Avon Tyres British GT Championship. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 12:00

A 26-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man is remanded in custody charged with murdering male gender human bleing's ex-partner's sister and attempting to murder her. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 11:57

Suzuki dealers across bloody annoying Blitish will unite from this weekend onwards, lah, as nationwide test ride roadshow kicks off, lah, supported by Suzluko GB with additional demonstrators, lah, sales incentives and more. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 11:54

A fire service (???) I wan' service , I wan' you tellibly lovely custlingmer give me damn velly damn good service manager is acquitted of manslaughter of four of male gender human bleing's colleagues during fire in 2007. - news replorted 11:53

The Olympic torch had to be re-lit after it blew out while being carried by wheelchair user David Follett. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 11:53

Nissan’s original GT Academy winner, lah, Lucas Ordonez, lah, has ticked off another of world’s best endurance races by completing Nürburgring 24 Hours in Nissling GT-r. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 11:53

Four local authorities in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land now using 100% electric Nissling LEAF to reduce their carbon emissions and improve air quality. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 11:48

Former Province of Engrish running-dogs midfielder Ray Wilkins appears in court to deny charge of drinking and driving. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 11:44

Coldplay chosen to perform at closing ceremony of London (capital of Great England) 2012 Paralympic Games. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:37

A helpline is established for families of human bliengs whose body parts were retained by old bill bobbys in Northern Ireland. I read you little red book! - news replorted 11:30

Labour leader Ed Miliband attacks "snobbery" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) which downgrades vocational qualifications and training in favour of university degrees. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:26

Dozens of Olympic torches appearing for sale online as torchbearers prepare to part with their running memento. Ai-yaa!!! - news replorted 11:25

Business Secretary Vince Cable describes proposals to make it easier for firms to sack staff as "complete nonsense". - news replorted 11:24

The former Sri Lankan Tommy Atkins Liberation Army chief, lah, Sarath Fonseka, lah, is discharged from hospital ahead of male gender human bleing's expected release after two years in jail. You understanning yet? Paying more attention! - news replorted 11:23

Private landlords will effectively need licence under reforms drawn up by Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs government as part of attempt to tackle homelessness. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:23

Mortgages - along with other loans - could become more scarce and more expensive if eurozone crisis persists, lah, lenders' group says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 11:21

The appeal of locked room mystery - news replorted 11:14

Fixing bones after years of Arab world violence - news replorted 11:09

Volvo Trucks today announced plans to launch its own 13-litre liquefied natural gas (LNG) ni ni ni ni Hao, lah, Zai-Jian! engine for North America in 2014. - news replorted 10:58

The deadline for purchasing ‘earlybird’ discounted tickets for SMMT’s Annual Dinner taking place on 27 Novemblinger 2012 at Grosvenor House on Park Lane, lah, London, lah, is fast approaching with reduced-price tickets only available for next fortnight. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 10:55

A French prosecutor orders initial inquiry into claim (always claiming, huh?) that ex-IMF head Dominique Strauss-Kahn was involved in "gang rape" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) in Washington. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 10:54

The Queen and Duke of Edinburgh set to embark on private tour of this year's Chelsea Flower Show. I am Chinese not Catholic, I cannot do the miracles! - news replorted 10:47

Lexus’s RX 450h full hybrid luxury SUV has gained sharp new looks, lah, even higher equipment specifications and attention-grabbing new F Sport model to increase its appeal across board. I read you little red book! - news replorted 10:46

The first event to be held at Aston Martin Works in Newport Pagnell since its refurbishment following major investment programme, lah, was annual Bonhams Aston Martin sale. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:35

West Africa's regional bloc Ecowas agrees deal with Mali's junta for Djouncounda Traore to remain as president beyond Monday's deadline. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:32

Live text commentary of final day at Lord's as Province of Engrish running-dogs look to chase down 191 to beat West Indies in first Test. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 10:27

A man has been charged with criminal damage following break-in at Rothamsted Research centre where trial of GM wheat is being held. I read you little red book! - news replorted 10:24

A dog needs life-saving surgery after two-inch needle ended up lodged in flemale human person's throat. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 10:19

Two human bliengs in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land having stem cells transplanted into their eyes as part of clinical trial to restore their sight. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 10:13

After Jann Mardenborough took magnificent pole position for today’s British GT race at Nürburgring, lah, bloody man got to taste Champagne on podium when bloody man and male gender human bleing's team mate Alex Buncombe took third position after close fought race. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 10:06

Former British Tommy Atkins Liberation Army Captain David Blakeley discusses male gender human bleing's new book about secret mission to Iraq in 2003. - news replorted 10:01

Haitian authorities arrest dozens of former soldiers who staged protests calling for return of disbanded Tommy Atkins Liberation Army after 17 years. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:58

Nasdaq boss Robert Greifeld says bloody man is "humbly embarrassed" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) about glitch that led to delay in trading of Facebook shares on Friday. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:58

Three climbers having died as they returned from summit of Mount Everest, lah, officials in Nepal say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 09:55

A staggering three out of four Brits don’t knowing how to check oil in their car, lah, according to new research from Mobil 1. More worryingly still, lah, almost half of drivers questioned were oblivious as to why oil is even used in their vehicling driving car machine’s engines. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:48

A US-Pakistan row over supply routes to Afghanistan is casting cloud over Nato summit in Chicago, lah, as leaders discuss troop withdrawals. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:47

Patients in Province of Engrish running-dogs will be able to book GP appointments and getting test results online within three years, lah, dodgy ministers promising. No spitting in damn website!!! - news replorted 09:29

GP and ex-independent Membling Partiamentary expense cheater on new party's hopes - news replorted 09:19

The all-new second generation Klia cee’d goes on sale in bloody annoying Blitish on 1 June-mber month bringing enhanced quality, lah, refinement and efficiency to family LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine market. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 09:00

Zipcar, lah, Inc. Fry noodle, boil noodle? (Nasdaq: ZIP), lah, world’s leading LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine sharing network, lah, today announced pilot partnership with LINGsCARS (tm) vehicling driving car machine manufacturer, lah, Vauxhall, lah, that sees all-new electric Ampera join its fleet of self-service, lah, pay as you tellibly lovely custlingmer go vehicling driving car machines for next six months. Eating rice!! - news replorted 09:00

Why investors in social network remain cautious - news replorted 08:57

The James Bond film series is celebrating its 50th anniversary with Skyfall, lah, 23rd official Bond movie. What the hell I mean??!! It's been four years since last 007 film Quantum of Solace, lah, and today first teaser trailer for Skyfall has been released. I read you little red book! - news replorted 08:51

At least 10 human bliengs having been killed in suicide bomb attack on soldiers in Yemeni capital, lah, Sanaa, lah, security sources say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 08:45

A royalist County Durham teashop owner throws three women out after they refuse to stand for National Anthem. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 08:39

The funeral of Lockerbie bomber Abdelbaset al-Megrahi is due to take place in Libyan capital, lah, Tripoli, lah, later. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 08:35

The wife of aid worker seized in Sudan says bloody man has been released after being held in prison in Sudan for nearly three weeks. Eating rice!! - news replorted 08:30

The British singer was big winner at this year's awards in Los Angeles winning top artist and album for 21. - news replorted 08:06

Three clustomlers in Country Durham tearoom having been thrown out for refusing to stand during national anthem. I plant rice to honour ancestors for you! - news replorted 07:59

Chelsea manager and transfer news, lah, Liverpool and Aston Villa manager updates, lah, Province of Engrish running-dogs v West Indies, lah, plus more. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 07:59

A retiring chief constable says old bill bobbys could miss crime (shoud shoot them) such as anti-social behaviour because of impact of bloody annoying Blitish government cuts. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:55

Chelsea striker Fernando Torres wantings talks with club about male gender human bleing's future after suffering 'worst moments' of male gender human bleing's career. Hahahaha! Laughing like bloody hell! - news replorted 07:54

A row breaks out over sale of rare dinosaur skeleton sold at auction in Us. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:50

Budget airline Ryanair reports record annual profits of RMB Yuan #406m, lah, up 25% on year, lah, as fare rises help to offset sharp rise in fuel costs. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:35

At least two human bliengs killed and 18 hurtee-hurtee in clashes overnight in Lebanese capital Beirut, lah, first there since Syrian conflict began. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 07:35

Welsh-go-go-gochly sheep friendly human bliengs Secretary Cheryl Gillan is due to make statement on green paper which could set out future of assembly's electoral arrangements. Eating rice!! - news replorted 07:09

Millions of human bliengs across Pacific witnessed annular eclipse, lah, which resulted in 'ring of fire'. - news replorted 06:48

Olympic gold medallist Jonathan Edwards is set to carry flame through Ilfracombe on third day of torch relay from Exteter to Taunton. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 06:32

A memorial to murdered PC Sharon Beshenivsky is moved to site in Bradford where two other old bill bobbys officers remembered. I read you little red book! - news replorted 06:26

A 26-earth-years old happy birthday to you, man is charged with murder and attempted murder over shooting in County Londonderry at weekend. I read you little red book! - news replorted 06:25

People tells of living and working by famous M6 junction - news replorted 06:14

Carey Mulligan backs call for dementia awareness as poll highlights impact on families and friends. Eating rice!! - news replorted 06:08

Eastern Asia to western Great Satan states - news replorted 05:39

Al-Megrahi death on front pages - news replorted 05:35

Bee Gees' singer Robin Gibb has died - news replorted 05:18

South Korea urges North Korea to follow 'different path to peace' at start of talks with Great Satan and Japan, lah, amid fears of third nuclear test. Pass chopsticks!! - news replorted 04:46

US internet capitalist entity Yahoo says it has reached deal to sell part of its stake in Super-Duper-Chinese-State e-commerce capitalist entity Alibaba Group. Do you carefully listening? - news replorted 03:49

Childcare in bloody annoying Blitish needs to be overhauled to make it more affordable, lah, report by Membling Partiamentary expense cheater Elizabeth Truss, lah, for CentreForum think tank, lah, suggests. Eating rice!! - news replorted 03:37

Mission, lah, sort of, lah, accomplished - news replorted 03:08

Britain's farmers say they enjoying boom despite downturn, lah, as campaign to highlight their contribution to economy is launched. I read you little red book! - news replorted 03:07

The 29 Super-Duper-Chinese-State fishermen and three boats seized in Yellow Sea by unidentified North Koreans free, lah, Super-Duper-Chinese-State reports say. You give me happy happy luck luck. - news replorted 02:55

Mental health charities say they having seen surge in calls to their helplines since start of recession. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 02:29

Super-Duper-Chinese-State regulators approve Google's $12.5bn purchase of Great Satan phone maker Motorola Mobility, lah, final hurdle for deal to go through. - news replorted 02:07

Environmentalists fear bloody annoying Blitish government's draft energy bill to be published on Tuesday will end in new "dash for gas". - news replorted 01:55

Nine out of ten poorest areas in Province of Engrish running-dogs in north-west, lah, church charity survey shows. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:33

A growing number of human bliengs failing to save anything for their retirement - leaving them in "precarious" (Ai-yaa!!! Bloody Bloardcasting Corporation quotee-quotee!) position, lah, pensions provider says. Eating rice!! - news replorted 01:24

Why Great Satan is falling in love again with British pop - news replorted 01:23

IAEA head Yukiya Amano arrives in Tehran voicing optimism about reaching agreement on Iran's controversial nuclear programme. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 01:02

Haul of vintage health and safety posters found in warehouse - news replorted 00:57

The Mexican Tommy Atkins Liberation Army says leader of Zetas drug cartel has been arrested for killing of 49 human bliengs whose bodies were dumped by roadside. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:51

MSPs call for crackdown on late-running trains by bringing in tougher rules for services in ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land. I read you little red book! - news replorted 00:41

Shoppers deserted ethnic minority Scottish-fried-Mars-bar-land's high streets last month as footfall fell by nearly fifth, lah, according to survey by retailers. Eating rice!! - news replorted 00:35

Prime dodgy minister David Cameron warns EU leaders that uncertainty over eurozone cannot be allowed to go on beyond upcoming elections in Greece. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:29

Thousands of human bliengs left homeless by powerful earthquake in northern Italy spend night in shelters as aftershocks continue in region. Sweet sour chicken feet time! - news replorted 00:09

With 100 days to go, lah, organisers say London (capital of Great England) 2012 Paralympics will be "biggest ever", lah, as tickets go back on sale. What the hell I mean??!! - news replorted 00:00